Now That You Know
by SdaisyS
Summary: Now that Anastasia Steele has an idea of what BDSM is about, will she forgive her first Dominant/Boyfriend for going too far with a belting incident or will she explore the lifestyle on her own? Original Characters in this story. Slight OOC. NO CHEATING. [HEA] {I do not own FSoG}
1. (1) Curious

**APOV**

 _"Count, Anastasia."_

I wake with a start, bracing myself for the bite of the brown leather belt on my behind.

I rub my face as I continue to pant when I realize it was just a dream. _Or was it a nightmare?_ I can't believe I actually agreed to do that, but at least now I know I can't be want he needs and he can't be what I want. I knew I should of told him I only agree to do the sexual stuff and not the punishing, controlling stuff, although, I guess he wouldn't of agreed to that so I would of been stuck in my life, one cat shy of becoming the crazy cat lady.

I ease myself up gently to sit, careful of my sore behind, and climb out of bed to get a drink of water.

As I drink my water, I lean against the kitchen counter and think about BDSM.

The sex is hot, really hot. He may not of wanted to eliminate punishments but perhaps there are some who would. I know I'm too 'innocent' to go to an actual BDSM club to ask questions so I decided to search online.

I walk to Kate's room and grab her laptop, taking it back to my room so I can look up more about BDSM.

I lay on my stomach so I wont have to sit on my behind, since it's still hurting, and power up the laptop.

I search BDSM chat-rooms so I can ask my questions without actually talking to a Dominant or a Submissive, too afraid they would either intimidate me or convince me into doing something I didn't want to do.

I click on a link that leads me to a fetish chat room. It's not what I'm looking for so I close the window and open another. This one seems more tame and sophisticated, if BDSM can be labeled as such, so I think I'll use this one.

I have to enter a pen-name and log in to chat. After I take some time thinking of a pen-name, I chose _BlushingRose,_ because I blush a lot and my middle name is Rose. I wouldn't want to use my real name for this.

When I'm logged in, I read the forum that is going on and it all seems pretty tame with nothing too inexplicable happening. I have the option to private message the users but I don't want to click someone at random so I write a message for the board and hope someone will respond.

 _BlushingRose:_ **New to BDSM. Curious. I have some questions, can anyone help?**

I get a few responses.

 _DarkMaster:_ _ **I'd be more than happy to help train you.**_

 _Slave4U:_ _ **I'm new as well, but I can help as best as I can. What would you like to know?**_

 _Mistress50:_ _ **There is a FAQ at the top with Q & A. Most questions can be answered there.**_

I'm about to respond to Slave4U when a chime alerts me that I have a private message so I click on the icon and a small private box pops up with a message.

 _FiftyShades:_ _ **I'm available to assist you.**_

I message this person back.

 _BlushingRose:_ **Does BDSM have to involve pain/punishment?**

 _FiftyShades:_ _ **It's a part of the lifestyle. Goes with the territory**_ **.** _ **The intensity will be discussed and decided on before you begin a scene and Submissives are given safewords to use. As you get more comfortable with everything you can increase intensity to allow you to test your limits and tolerance for pain, however, it's mainly about pleasure. Pain can be very pleasurable.**_

I roll my eyes as I type.

 _Pain can be very pleasurable my ass, literally._ My behind is still in pain and there's nothing pleasurable about it.

 _BlushingRose:_ **So I can choose no punishments as like, my hard limit?**

 _FiftyShades:_ _**You can chose to add punishments as your hard limit, yes. You can choose anything as a hard limit, though not many Doms/Subs choose punishment in general as a hard limit. It's usually more specific, for example, no caning. I'm assuming you're a Submissive since you don't want punishments. May I ask if you are?**_

 _BlushingRose:_ **I guess I would qualify as a Submissive. I'm not really in the lifestyle but I guess if I were, I'd be a Submissive.**

I definitely couldn't be a dominant that's for sure.

 _FiftyShades:_ _ **Have you done a scene before or are you looking to enter the lifestyle?**_

 _BlushingRose:_ **I've done some BDSM as a Submissive, though I'm not very submissive, and my experience was very limited.**

 _FiftyShades:_ _ **Have you been punished?**_

 _BlushingRose:_ **Yes. I didn't like it.**

 _FiftyShades:_ _ **You're not meant to like it, it's a punishment. Did you safe word?**_

 _BlushingRose:_ **No.**

 _FiftyShades:_ _ **So it wasn't that bad? Most pain is in your head.**_

 _BlushingRose:_ **Actually, I forgot to safe word.**

 _FiftyShades:_ _ **You forgot? Did you say anything to let him/her know to stop?**_

 _BlushingRose:_ **No. I didn't say anything until he finished.**

 _FiftyShades:_ _ **How is your Dom going to trust you to notify him/her when you've reached your limit?**_

 _BlushingRose:_ **Well, I've left him so that wont be an issue.**

 _FiftyShades:_ _ **Why?**_

 _BlushingRose:_ **For beating me. I can't do that again so I left.**

 _FiftyShades:_ _ **If you can't handle pain, how did you become involved with BDSM, if I may ask?**_

 _BlushingRose:_ **He pursued me and convinced me to try it.**

 _FiftyShades:_ _ **I see.**_

 _BlushingRose:_ **Thanks for your help, I'm not sure if BDSM is for me.**

I shut the laptop and push it aside as I get out of bed and go to the bathroom.

In the bathroom, I lower my pajama bottoms and look at my red, sore behind in the mirror.

 _Would he of stopped if I used a safe word? Would I have stayed even after he stopped now that I know what he likes? Are there Dominants that would only give me kinky sex or would I have to find a ... vanilla boyfriend and convince him to be kinky and dominating in the bedroom?_

I guess I did ask for it, and not in the 'I asked for it' type of way that I didn't actually do anything, I literally asked for it, telling him to show me the worst. I wanted to see if I could handle the pain side of BDSM since the sex side was so good.

I grab some cream and rub it on my behind to sooth the pain then go back to my room.

I'm tired and when I look at the clock I see it's well after midnight. I need to get some sleep because I need to get a car tomorrow. I was too sore to look for one today and since I started working today I just used Kate's car. I can use Kate's car while she's gone, but I'll need transportation to and from work when Kate returns home and I'd prefer not to ride the bus.

Thinking of this reminds me of the check he gave me for Wanda.

Before I climb into bed, I grab my bag and pull out the envelope that has the check he gave me inside.

 _$24,000?!_

I shake my head at the ridiculous amount and put it back in the envelope.

I'm not sure if that's accurate, but I need a new car since he sold mine, saying it was an unsafe deathtrap, so I'll have to use it.

I climb back into my bed and go to sleep.

* * *

After work I went to a used car lot but haven't found a car yet. I'm going to need help, because the used car salesmen see young, unknowledgeable female and pounce like a cat would a mouse. I did deposit the check into my bank account this morning and finished my second day at SIP. My boss is a little creepy, bossy, and grouchy. He's so demanding, such a tyrant, and stands much too close but I notice he does that with everyone.

I'm home now, eating my dinner with the television on in, though I'm not watching or listening I just have it on for background noise because it's too quiet here without Kate. She's still in Barbados with her parents and Ethan for another few days.

 _~buzz~_

The door buzzer startles me. We've just moved to Seattle so I'm not sure who it could be.

I set my food down and walk to our entry system.

"Yes?"

 _"Delivery for Ms. Steele."_ A bored voice comes through the intercom.

"I didn't order anything."

 _"I have a package here for you, ma'am."_

I huff. "I'll be right there."

I'm not allowing anyone access to the building when I know I didn't order anything. I can only assume Kate would order something, but they said the delivery was for me and Kate has been gone for awhile.

I put on a sweater, wrapping it around my body and slip on some flip-flops, then go down to the front door of the apartment building.

When I open the main door there is a delivery boy, noisily chewing bubble gum, holding a long gold cardboard box that has a red bow attached to it.

"Ms. Steele?"

"Yes."

"Sign here, please." He thrusts a clipboard in front of me, so I sign my name on the line and accept the huge box which is surprisingly light and close the door.

Once I'm back inside my apartment, I sit on the sofa, crossing my legs under myself and open the package. The moment I open the box I know who sender is when I see the 2 dozen long-stemmed, white roses and a card. I pick up the card, turning it around to read the finely cursive writing.

 _Anastasia,_  
 _Congratulations on your first day at work._  
 _I hope it went well._  
 _C.G._

I stare at the card confused, wondering why he sent this to me. He said if I left, there was no going back. And my first day was yesterday.

I stand to throw the roses in the trash, but as I hold them, hovering above the wastebasket, I can't bring myself to throw the beautiful roses away. So instead I hunt for a vase, add water and arrange them, sitting the bouquet on the small breakfast bar in the kitchen.

After I clean up and shower, I change into my pajamas and get into bed. My foot hits something hard so I move the blankets and see Kate's laptop. I forgot I left it on my bed after I used it last night.

I grab the laptop and open it, squinting from the bright light it makes in my dark room. When my eyes finally adjust I see it's still on the BDSM site that I was on last night. Thank goodness Kate isn't home to have seen this, what was I thinking? Well, in my defense was tired last night.

I'm about to close the windows and go to sleep when I see _FiftyShades_ has sent me a message from last night after I sent my final message.

 _FiftyShades:_ _ **If you have anymore questions, I'd be happy to answer them for you if you're interested in exploring the lifestyle.**_

 _BlushingRose:_ **Thank you for your help last night.**

I'm about to close the windows so I can go to sleep but the private message chime goes off.

 _FiftyShades:_ _ **You're welcome. Do you have anymore questions?**_

 _BlushingRose:_ **No. I don't think it's for me.**

 _FiftyShades:_ _ **Is it because of the punishments? Or is there more?**_

 _BlushingRose:_ **The punishments and the controlling my life.**

 _FiftyShades:_ _ **So you enjoyed the rough, kinky sex?**_

"Oh my gosh." I whisper and blush as I read his or her message.

 _BlushingRose:_ **Um.**

 _FiftyShades:_ _ **No need to be shy.**_

 _BlushingRose:_ **Yes,** **I enjoyed that.**

 _FiftyShades:_ _ **May I ask what you've done?**_

 _BlushingRose:_ **That's a little too personal.**

 _FiftyShades:_ _ **Okay. How have you been punished?**_

 _BlushingRose:_ **He hit me with a belt.**

 _FiftyShades:_ _ **Is that the only time he's struck you?**_

 _BlushingRose:_ **Well, no.**

 _FiftyShades:_ _ **So the other times were tolerable.**_

I think about the flogger and squirm when I remember him using it on me then the incredible orgasm I received after, but then I remember when he spanked me when I rolled my eyes. I didn't like it, it hurt and I didn't like the way it made me feel. I'd rather not do that again, but I will admit I became aroused and he proved to me how wet I was when he put his fingers inside of me then fucked me from behind.

 _Was that punishment tolerable?_

 _BlushingRose:_ **I guess so, yes.**

 _FiftyShades:_ _ **The belt, was that your first punishment?**_

 _BlushingRose:_ **No. Why are you asking?**

 _FiftyShades:_ _ **I'm just trying to help. You said you were intrigued with the lifestyle.**_

 _BlushingRose:_ **I also said the lifestyle isn't for me.**

 _FiftyShades:_ _ **How do you know that?**_

 _BlushingRose:_ **Because I don't want to be beat before I have sex.**

 _FiftyShades:_ _ **Which is why I asked what you have done. You said you're curious and experienced scenes before the belting. Did you enjoy yourself?**_

 _BlushingRose:_ **Yes.**

 _FiftyShades:_ _ **So it may have to do with your pain tolerance level and your ex-Dom pushing you over your limit. Perhaps, if you learn what your limits are, regarding pain, you will enjoy the lifestyle.**_

 _BlushingRose:_ **How am I to do that?**

 _FiftyShades:_ _ **Where are you located?**_

 _BlushingRose:_ **Are you serious?**

 _FiftyShades:_ _ **Very.**_

 _BlushingRose:_ **No offense, but I'm not comfortable telling someone over the internet, in a BDSM chat room no less, where I'm located.**

 _FiftyShades:_ _ **Fair point well made.**_

 _BlushingRose:_ **Besides, you don't even know me. You don't know if I'm male or female, anything about me. I could be a serial killer. You really shouldn't try to meet people this way, you could get hurt.**

 _FiftyShades:_ **I've never met anyone online before, I have Subs hand-picked for me and my specific tastes, but another point well made. What I meant by that was, there could be BDSM clubs near you that you can visit and try a scene with your new found limits to see if the lifestyle is for you.**

 _BlushingRose:_ **Oh. Sorry. I thought... well, you know. *shrugs shoulders apologetically***

 _FiftyShades:_ _ **Understandable. If you were mine, I would reward you for being so cautious with your safety.**_

 _Fifty would reward me?_

I feel my insides clenching deliciously with pleasure at the thought of being rewarded. I choose to ignore the suggestive message as I reply.

 _BlushingRose:_ **I wouldn't feel comfortable going to a club and surely any Dominant wouldn't want a Submissive with a low tolerance for pain. Besides, I would feel used if I did that. I'm not a one-night stand type of girl.**

I lost my virginity not too long ago, but I don't mention that.

 _FiftyShades:_ _ **Is there any chance you can reconcile with your previous Dom? Perhaps he will go easier on you now that he knows your tolerance for pain is low, and you will safeword when you need to, to let him know when you've reached your limit.**_

 _BlushingRose:_ **I don't think so. He said if I left there was no going back to him.**

I look towards the kitchen, even though there is a wall blocking my view.

 _BlushingRose:_ **Although, he did send me roses today to congratulate me on my new job.**

He takes a bit longer to respond than usual.

 _FiftyShades:_ _ **Congratulations on your new job.**_

 _BlushingRose:_ **Thanks.**

 _FiftyShades:_ _ **What is it that you do?**_

 _BlushingRose:_ **I'm in publishing. You?**

 _FiftyShades:_ _ **Business.**_

I yawn and look at my alarm clock.

 _BlushingRose:_ **Speaking of work, we've been talking for hours. It's late and I should be sleeping.**

 _FiftyShades:_ _ **I've enjoyed chatting with you, Rose. I don't sleep well so if you find yourself up, message me and we can talk.**_

 _BlushingRose:_ **Surprisingly, I've enjoyed chatting with you, Fifty.**

 _FiftyShades:_ _ **Should I be offended?**_

 _BlushingRose:_ **No, I'm sorry, I didn't mean it like that.**

 _FiftyShades:_ _ **Sleep well, Rose.**_

I can tell I'm speaking with a Dominant when he dismisses me.

I look outside and see the rain falling, it comforts me when I sleep.

 _BlushingRose:_ **You too, Fifty. It's raining here, I like to sleep when it storms so hopefully I will sleep well.**

 _FiftyShades:_ _ **It's raining where I am as well.**_

* * *

 ** _Join me on Facebook in the FSoG group that lanieloveu & I created:  
_FSoG Fanfic Obsessed**


	2. (2) Now That You Know

**A/N:** ** _I cannot tell you how excited I am for you to read this chapter!_**

 **Enjoy!** **:D**

* * *

 **APOV**

"Hey, Ana." I look up from the manuscript I was editing when I hear Claire from SIP's front reception and see her standing at my desk.

"Did you hear the rumor going around that SIP was sold?" She says in a hushed whisper as she looks around to make sure nobody heard her.

"No." I try to sound clam, but what does that mean for SIP's employees, for me? I just started working here Monday.

"Yeah, I heard GEH bought SIP."

"GEH?"

"Grey Enterprises and Holdings." She clarifies. "GEH is known for buying companies and selling them off, piece by piece."

"Great." I sigh and roll my eyes.

"Ana!" My boss calls for me through his open door.

"I'll let you get back to working for the Grinch."

I giggle at Claire's nickname for him as I stand and smooth the skirt I borrowed from Kate's closet.

"Yes, Mr. Hyde?" I ask when I enter his office.

"Get me a coffee, sugar."

At first I'm taken aback, thinking it's an endearment, but then I realize he's telling me he wants sugar with his coffee.

"Yes, sir."

I go to the employee kitchen/break room and grab his coffee and a few sugar packets as he requested and walk back to his office.

I knock before I enter and place the coffee mug and sugar pockets on his desk.

"I don't need any sugar." He tosses the packets aside.

I frown, confused. _Didn't he ask for sugar?_

"If it's alright, I'd like to take my lunch break now."

"Sure."

I give him a polite smile as I turn to leave and gather my bag from my desk to leave.

There's a café down the street on the corner I want to try so I walk the few short blocks and order a sandwich.

I'm given a number, and am told they will bring my meal to me, so I find a table in the back of the small café and sit alone. I pull out a book to read while I wait since I always have a book with me. It doesn't take long for my food to arrive so I put my book down on the table and start eating.

I look up when I see shadows in my peripheral vision and see two men sitting at the table in front of mine. I can see the front of an older gentleman with salt and pepper like hair, dressed in business attire, and the back of the other younger gentleman with copper color hair, dressed the same but slightly more expensive, not that I would know anything about designers but his suit looks like it was made specifically for him.

They begin a conversation that I'm not paying any attention to as I continue eating my lunch.

"Will there be anything else, Mr. Grey?"

My head snaps up when I hear the waitress purr his name.

 _Grey? Grey of GEH, Grey? GEH that is taking over SIP, Grey?_

"No, thank you." The older gentleman dismisses her and she takes one last longing look at the younger of the two then sashays away, putting way too much swing in her hips.

Mr. Grey looks like I would expect a CEO to look. Sophisticated, distinguished, older gentleman, although, he has kind eyes.

I wasn't listening to their conversation before, but now I inch forward a bit to listen in, hopeful that they will discuss SIP and I will know if he plans on selling or keeping the company.

Mr. Grey chuckles, shaking his head.

"What?" The younger man snaps.

"She was just being polite, did you have to roll your eyes?"

"She was trying to get laid." He's so brusque.

Mr. Grey begins eating and soon they converse.

"What is GEH planning to do with the publishing house?" Mr. Grey asks the younger gentleman, I suspect is a GEH employee.

 _So it's true, GEH did buy SIP._ Unless GEH bought another publishing house, but it can't be a coincidence. _Can it?_

"Sell it." The younger man says after he swallows his bite.

I gasp when I hear this.

"Ros convinced me to buy it since it was going under so we're going to sell it piece by piece and make a lot of money from it. I have no need for a publishing house, there's no money in it." The younger employee continues.

He must work for Mr. Grey.

Mr. Grey notices me watching them which alerts his employee and just as the younger man turns around, I quickly look down and take a big bite of my sandwich to act as if I wasn't eavesdropping, but to no surprise, the sauce from my sandwich gets all over the side of my mouth.

I put my sandwich down and quickly wipe my lip with my finger and suck on it as I reach for a napkin.

I realize I no longer hear the men talking so I peek at them through my lashes, looking like a fool with my finger still in my mouth. I am met with intense grey eyes that belong to the most beautiful man I have ever seen, a glimpse of perfection at it's finest.

I gasp but start to cough as I still had food and my finger in my mouth.

I finally take my finger out of my mouth and cover my coughing as I grab the napkin and clean my face.

I risk another glimpse of the gentlemen when I take a drink of my water, looking over the rim of the glass, and see the man glancing over his shoulder before he turns back around completely to continue his lunch and conversation with Mr. Grey.

I can feel my cheeks heat with the familiar blush as I continue my lunch.

When I'm finished eating, I quickly walk passed Mr. Grey's table even though he has already left and only his younger companion remains, but that's the reason I'm rushing. I'm so embarrassed he caught me staring and with food all over my face and my finger in my mouth.

I make it out of the café without any bodily harm or tripping over my own two feet, only to realize I forgot my book on the table so I quickly turn around and nearly crash into someone but luckily I don't.

"I'm sorry." I look up as I apologize and am met with the same grey, beautiful, intense, eyes.

There's something about the look he has, I've seen it before, and for some unknown reason, I quickly bow my head and look down in his dominating presence.

I swear I think I heard him gasp but I can't be sure since he cleared his throat immediately after he sharply inhaled.

"Look at me." He demands mildly.

Almost instinctively, I lift my head and see a spark in his eyes like he's just found a missing piece to a puzzle, and that smirk is totally swoon worthy.

I bite my lip as I get my first good look at this man. Handsome, extremely handsome, and tall, really tall, muscular, his strong jaw, his straight nose, his unruly copper hair, his grey eyes that now shine with wonder and awe. He looks like the Greek God Adonis. I'm completely taken with his beauty.

When he looks at my mouth, breaking the hold his eyes had on me, I quickly shake my head to clear it and release my lip.

 _What am I doing?!_

"Excuse me." I try to walk around him but he holds up a book, my book, stopping me.

"Is this yours?"

"Yes, sir." I say when I see the book I forgot in his hand. "Thank you."

"You're welcome."

I look at him again, but I can't hold his gaze for long.

I don't say anything more, I just turn around and walk away.

As I walk, I glance over my shoulder to see the man still standing in the middle of the sidewalk with his hands deep inside his pockets watching me like a lion would a lamb before he strikes.

 _Is he a Dominant?_

When I return to work from lunch, I don't mention the conversation I overheard with Mr. Grey and his employee about selling SIP because I don't want to scare everyone. I just sit at my desk and begin to work.

Mr. Hyde is in a meeting, but left me a note, asking me to type and send an email to his authors.

I turn my computer on and log into my SIP email account. I'm about to create a new message when I see I have an email. I roll my eyes when I see it's from him and that he sent it to my work email address as I click to read the message.

 **.**

 **To:** Anastasia Steele

 **From:** Chadwick Garrett

 **Subject:** Tomorrow

 _Dear Anastasia,_

 _Forgive this intrusion at work. I hope that it's going well._

 _Did you get my flowers?_

 _I note that tomorrow is the gallery opening for your friend's show, and you did invite me to join you._

 _I would be more than happy to give you a ride since we are both attending, should you wish._

 _Let me know._

Chad Garrett  
Owner of Garrett's Bar & Grill

 **.**

We broke up, his invitation surely is voided, right? Although, it is quite a long drive and it will be late when I returned to Seattle, perhaps it's wise to go with a man since I'm alone, and I guess I did invite him. But why does he still want to come after we broke up? He said if I left that would be it.

I text José to find out when his show starts tomorrow and receive his message saying 7:30.

 **.**

 **To:** Chadwick Garrett

 **From:** Anastasia Steele

 **Subject:** Tomorrow.

 _Hello, Chad._

 _Yes, I received your flowers, they're lovely._

 _How did you get this email address?_

 _And yes, I would appreciate a ride to José's show._ _It begins at 7:30._

 _Thank you._

Anastasia Steele  
Assistant to Jack Hyde, Editor, SIP

 **.**

I don't mention he sent the roses on my second day and not my first, maybe he was nervous to send them since he said once we're done, we're done, and didn't want me to get the wrong idea. After I send the email I get back to work and start to type out the email Mr. Hyde left for me to send to the authors but I get another email alert and see it's from Chad again, responding to my message.

 **.**

 **To:** Anastasia Steele

 **From:** Chadwick Garrett

 **Subject:** Tomorrow

 _Anastasia,_

 _It wasn't difficult, regarding how I got your work email._ _Anyone with a brain could have figured it out._

 _What time shall I pick you up?_

Chad Garrett  
Owner of Garrett's Bar & Grill

 **.**

I roll my eyes, knowing full well he can't see me or punish me for my misdemeanor. _Not everyone is computer smart_.

 **.**

 **To:** Chadwick Garrett

 **From:** Anastasia Steele

 **Subject:** Tomorrow

 _I'm finished working at 5 o'clock.  
_ _  
I will drive home, you can pick me up there.  
_

Anastasia Steele  
Assistant to Jack Hyde, Editor, SIP

 **.**

 **.**

 **To:** Anastasia Steele

 **From:** Chadwick Garrett

 **Subject:** Tomorrow

 _I look forward to seeing you._

Chad Garrett  
Owner of Garrett's Bar & Grill

 **.**

 _He looks forward to seeing me?_ He didn't seem to mind me leaving Saturday morning with my sore behind and ego. I don't even understand why he's offering to accompany me to José's show. I asked him Friday when we were still together, but I'm thankful to go with someone and since Kate is still in Barbados, Chad will have to do. Maybe we can be friends or try a more tame BDSM relationship like my pen-pal _FiftyShades_ suggested.

I continue working on the email but quickly look up when someone sits on my desk and leans toward me a little too close for comfort.

"Looking good, Ana." Mr. Hyde murmurs with dark eyes and a smirk as he rubs my shoulder with one hand.

It almost sounds like he's talking about something else, something dirty minded.

"I hope so," I say as I shrug him off discreetly, putting some of my hair that has fallen out of place behind my ear and move my chair a little further from him so he wont touch me again. "I had to correct a few grammar errors so far and I've just started."

"You're doing great. Perhaps we should celebrate with drinks."

"Oh." I frown. "I don't think that's very appropriate."

 _I can't date my boss! Even if he wasn't creepy. It's just... wrong._

"A few of us go out on Friday after work, perhaps you can join us?"

"Maybe." I say to pacify him and get him off my desk since we would be going with a group.

"Great." He grins as he finally gets off my desk, like I just agreed to something else entirely, and walks into his office.

I shake off the creepy feeling he gives me and get back to work.

* * *

I'm laying in bed, trying to sleep but I'm just tossing and turning because I feel like I'm forgetting something, but I know I'm not. Then I turn my head and see Kate's laptop on my bedside table and sit up. I've been messaging that person from the BDSM chat room the last couple nights, perhaps that's the reason I'm feeling like I'm forgetting something.

I grab the laptop and open it, power it on and log into the BDSM chat-room site to private message _FiftyShades,_ wondering if he or she will be on as well.

 _BlushingRose:_ **Hi.**

It doesn't take Fifty long to respond.

 _FiftyShades: **Hello.**_

 _BlushingRose:_ **Are you always on this site?**

 _FiftyShades: **Actually, no. The first time I was on the BDSM chat site was the night we began chatting after I stumbled upon it. After we spoke, I set it up that your messages are sent to my email instead of the BDSM site incase you had anymore questions. Are**_ **y** **ou** _ **always on the BDSM site?**_

 _BlushingRose:_ **Only to message you.**

 _FiftyShades: **Interesting.**_

 _BlushingRose:_ **I just felt like I was forgetting something until I remembered I was talking to you the last couple nights.**

 _FiftyShades: **I see. So have you made your decision regarding the BDSM lifestyle?**_

 _BlushingRose:_ **Um, I'm still not sure about the punishments or controlling every aspect of my life, but the um, kinky sex is great. I'd like to try it again but more tame. I'm not sure if I could find anyone willing to have just kinky BDSM sex without the hardcore punishments, but my ex emailed me today and I'm seeing him tomorrow.**

 _FiftyShades: **To reconcile?**_

 _BlushingRose:_ **To escort me to my friend's photography show. I'm not sure why he offered to take me after we broke up though.**

 _FiftyShades: **Perhaps you can talk to him about trying a lighter version of BDSM, since you're still interested.**_

 _BlushingRose:_ **I think I will. Thank you, Fifty.**

 _FiftyShades: **You're welcome.**_

I like chatting with Fifty and I'm not ready to sleep just yet so I continue.

 _BlushingRose: **How was your day?**_

 _FiftyShades: **Busy, per usual, although, interesting. Very interesting. You? How's the new job?**_

 _BlushingRose:_ **Ugh, creepy boss, rumors of a takeover, and I still don't have a car. I've been using my roommates while she's on vacation.**

 _FiftyShades: **Why does your boss creep you out?**_

 _BlushingRose:_ **He's just really weird. He even asked me out for drinks.**

 _FiftyShades: **Why is that weird?**_

 _BlushingRose:_ **It's not. I wouldn't feel comfortable dating my boss even if I was attracted to him, but** **he's like Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde with his mood swings. Which is funny because his name is Hyde. My first day he was pretty 'normal', yesterday he was a grouch, and today he was weird. He asked me for a coffee with sugar and when I brought him a coffee with sugar, he said he didn't need the sugar. I swear he asked for sugar. He sits to close to me or touches me and he's really mercurial. Hence, creepy.**

 _FiftyShades: **He touches you?!**_

 _Why is he getting so upset?_ Oh, he must think inappropriately.

 _BlushingRose:_ **Just my shoulder, nothing like you're thinking. It's just uncomfortable.**

 _FiftyShades: **You need to speak with him about your boundaries and if he continues, take the issue to higher up. You shouldn't feel uncomfortable at work.**_

 _BlushingRose:_ **Okay, I will. Thank you.**

 _FiftyShades: **You mentioned rumors of a takeover?**_

 _BlushingRose:_ **Yes, it's going around my office that another company is going to takeover the company I work for, and the company is known for keeping companies or selling them piece by piece to the highest bidder. It's believed they are going to sell the company I work for. I just started, if the rumors are true, which I believe they are, I'll be out of a job before I even start. I guess I should start looking for another job now** **.**

It's only rumored that GEH bought SIP, but I heard Mr. Grey and his employee talking about selling a publishing company. It can't be a coincidence.

 _FiftyShades: **What company is taking over yours?**_

I don't know much about GEH or Mr. Grey because I'm not involved in the business world, but I know a few people know of Grey Enterprises and Holdings and the infamous CEO, Mr. Grey, and Fifty said he was in business so if I tell Fifty, Grey Enterprises and Holdings, he may know I'm located in Seattle, then again, GEH does take over companies all over the world so he may not now I am located in Seattle. I decide to go ahead and tell him. _What harm could it do?_ Even if he finds out I'm from Seattle there are tons of people here and he doesn't know my real name.

 _BlushingRose:_ **A company named GEH.**

He doesn't reply as fast as he usually does so I wait for a response.

I wait and wait and _wait_ with still no reply.

 _BlushingRose:_ **Fifty?**

He still doesn't reply.

 _Maybe it's really late where he is and he fell asleep?_

Before I turn off the laptop, I set up a personal email account since I don't have one yet then I click the box that will send Fifty's messages to my email so I wont have to log into the BDSM chat room again, then put the laptop on my side table and lay down in bed.

I didn't even get a chance to tell Fifty I think I ran into a Dominant today.

 _Is it weird that I'm not thinking about seeing Chad tomorrow but about the mysterious FiftyShades?_

I hope Fifty is a guy, perhaps I should ask.

When I close my eyes, I dream of grey eyes, copper just fucked hair, and designer gray suits as my _FiftyShades_.

* * *

 **A/N:** ** _I hope I didn't disappoint too much since most of you were so convinced you knew what was going on._**

 ** _Those who have read my previous stories know I do FSoG with a twist._ ;) _This is my twist for this story_.  
 _If you want it to be more like the books, my suggestion; re-read the books._**

 _ **Thanks for reading and reviewing this story.**_


	3. (3) He Knows

**APOV**

I was interviewed today by a red-haired woman named Ros Baily from GEH, and I'm not sure why, but everyone at SIP was being interviewed by this lady. I've not seen her at SIP before so the rumors are now spreading like wild fire that GEH is keeping the publishing company, but I know they are selling since I overheard Mr. Grey and his employee at lunch yesterday. But it doesn't make sense if they are selling to re-interview the employees.

If Mr. Grey decided against selling... I wonder why he changed his mind?

I woke not feeling well and Mr. Hyde was in a piss poor mood all day today which didn't help. I've already been told at least ten times how awful I look by a handful of my coworkers, and my response is 'I feel awful' but I really didn't want to call in sick since I'm still in my first week and tomorrow is Friday, however, if I still feel like this tomorrow, I'm going to take the day off.

 _What could I miss if they are selling?_

I really should begin looking for another job. I doubt it will be something in publishing since I was interviewed by two publishing companies after graduation but SIP was the only one to offer me the job. Maybe I'll try GEH, surely another company wont buy and sell GEH.

"I'll see you tomorrow, Ana."

I look up hearing Jack, then I look at the time. I didn't even realize it was time to go.

"You got a hot date tonight?" He asks as I shut my computer down and pack away a few things for tomorrow.

I don't understand why he's asking, I don't think I look any different than any other day I've been here, in fact, I look worse because I don't feel well. Not to mention, it's a weekday, not the weekend.

"No." It's really none of his business and I just blurted it out. I don't want him to think I'm available so I correct myself. "Yes."

"Boyfriend?"

"Ex."

 _Ugh, damn it, Ana, stop blurting things out!_ _What is the point of saying you have a date if you say you're going out with your ex?!_

Since it's time to go, I stand ignoring the way he eyes my body as I grab my bag.

I try to move around him in a way where he can't check out my ass, but that's impossible. I ignore his lecherous stares at my body as I walk passed him.

I would take Fifty's advice and go to management about this, but what good would that do? He's a senior editor, having been with the company for years, and I've not been here a week yet.

 _Ugh, one good thing about finding a new job, no Jack Hyde_.

"You joining everyone tomorrow for a drink?" He asks, following me to the main lobby.

"I'm not sure, Jack, I'm not feeling well today so I would need to see how I feel tomorrow."

"Well, we need to celebrate your first week, even if it's one drink. We go to a pub across the street called Fifty's."

"Fifty's?" I abruptly stop when I hear this.

I can't help how thrilled I sound thinking of _FiftyShades,_ or the way my heart rate increased, _and is that butterflies?!_ I've never felt them before.

Maybe he lives in Seattle and owns Fifty's Pub? _Ugh, I don't even know if he's male or female or some 800lb lonely cat lady._

"Yes." Hyde sounds wary, and he brings me from my thoughts of Fifty. "Some significance to you?"

"No." My voice a little more high-pitched than I'd like. "I'll think about it. I'm going to go now, bye."

He nods and watches me leave.

I get the chills from some reason, like a window was left open, but obviously that's not the case as the windows here do not open.

I wave goodbye to Claire, instead of stopping since she's on the phone, and continue walking through the lobby of SIP.

Once I'm home, I rush to get ready since Chad is picking me up soon.

 _~buzz~_

"Yes?" I answer the intercom.

 _"I'm here, beautiful."_

Ugh, he's early and that gives me no time to get ready. I guess I'll go to José's show in my work attire.

"I'll be right down."

When I walk out, Chad is leaning against his black sports car with his hands in his pockets.

He's your typical, tall, dark, and handsome type, and that is originally what drew me to him. Well, that, and Kate would often say I'm missing the need-a-boyfriend gene, so when Chad showed an interest in me, I decided to give it a go, however, I never got that heart racing, palms sweaty, butterflies in my belly feeling with him. I long for that feeling, and I'm starting to think it either only happens in story books and fairy tales, or there's something wrong with me.

As I walk towards him, he pushes off his car and leans down to kiss me but I turn my head, giving him my cheek.

When I look at Chad, he looks disappointed.

 _What did he expect? Me to let him kiss me?_

"Hello, beautiful." He greets me.

"Hi." I'm surprised at how calm I sound.

I get in the passenger seat when Chad opens the door for me and I watch him walk around to get in on his side.

He starts to drive in the direction of SIP so I look out the window when we approach, hoping to see Fifty's Pub, and I do. I can't help the increase of my heart or the flutters in my belly as I think about the mysterious man that I've been chatting with the past few nights. Again, it's someone mythical is giving me these feelings. Fifty may be real, but it's not like I'll ever meet him.

 _How neat would that be if_ FiftyShades _owned Fifty's Pub, though?_ We work near each other and we talk online without even knowing it.

Chad continues to drive passed, not stopping, so I look out my window, following the pub with my eyes, even craning my neck, hoping to see _FiftyShades,_ however, I have no idea what this mystery person looks like.

After we pass the pub, I pull out my phone to give me something to do during the long drive to Portland.

I see I have a private message sent to my new email account and then I remember I set the private messages from the BDSM chat room to be sent to my email last night. _FiftyShades'_ messages are now forwarded to my email, but Fifty doesn't have my email address.

I open the email and read the message.

 _FiftyShades: **Sorry, I had something important come up.**_

I look at the time and see it was sent well after midnight, so I know he's apologizing for leaving our conversation unexpectedly last night. I thought he fell asleep, but it looks like something important, presumably business, came up.

 _BlushingRose:_ **It's okay. I understand.**

His response is as immediate as it has been, before he got called away last night.

 _FiftyShades: **Hey, you're back. How did your reconciliation go with your ex-Dom?**_

 _BlushingRose:_ **Actually, I'm with him now.**

 _FiftyShades:_ **_You_ are _kinky, aren't you._**

I giggle out loud.

 _BlushingRose:_ **Not like that!** **He just picked me up after work to take me to my friend's show.**

 _FiftyShades: **So why are you messaging me?**_

 _BlushingRose:_ **I saw your message from early this morning, you really don't sleep do you, and I wanted to ask you something.**

 _FiftyShades:_ **_About BDSM?_**

 _BlushingRose:_ **About you.**

 _FiftyShades: **Ask away, Rose.**_

"Anastasia, do you mind?" Chad calls my attention sounding annoyed.

I look at him and he doesn't look very happy.

"What?"

"You're with me and you're on your phone, giggling and laughing, totally ignoring me. It's rude and disrespectful, and I want to talk to you."

"Sorry." I put my phone down in my lap.

He sighs. "How are you?"

"I'm fine. How are you?"

"If I told you I was fine, I would be lying."

I want to say _'well, who's fault is that'_ , but I keep quiet, only flicking my eyebrow at him.

"You look good." He continues.

I furrow my brow. "What is that supposed to mean?"

"Nothing, I just didn't expect..." He trails off.

"What? You expected that I'd look like crap after we broke up?"

"Anastasia." He growls my name in warning.

"Look, Chad-"

"Anastasia, please. We need to talk." He interrupts me. "I miss you."

I just shake my head, deciding not to antagonize him since he's my ride home and we're not even in Portland yet.

"What do you want me say? You said-."

I feel my phone buzz in my hand and look down, biting my lip when I see _FiftyShades_ has messaged me again.

 _FiftyShades: **Crickets.**_

 _BlushingRose:_ **Sorry. Dealing with my ex.**

 _FiftyShades:_ **_Don't let him get on top of you, Rose._ ** **_What was it that you wanted to ask me?_**

I giggle again. Fifty's more playful today, more so than usual, and I like it. He is usually more 'professional' when we chat.

 _I wonder what's changed?_

 _BlushingRose:_ **Do you own a pub? Like a bar.**

 _FiftyShades:_ **_I own many things. A club being one, yes._**

I feel my heart beat pick up. _It is him. I know it. He owns Fifty's Pub._

 _BlushingRose:_ **Fifty's?**

 _FiftyShades: **What?**_

 _BlushingRose:_ **Is your bar called Fifty's Pub?**

It takes him a fraction longer to answer my question.

 _FiftyShades:_ **_No. Mile High._**

I try to rack my brain, thinking if there is a Mile High bar here in Seattle, but I come up empty and my phone buzzes letting me know I have a new message, bringing me out of my thoughts of Mile High bars in the Seattle area. Maybe he's not from Seattle, or I just don't know the area well enough since I'm still new here.

 _FiftyShades: **Why do you ask?**_

 _BlushingRose:_ **There's a local bar here where I am called Fifty's Pub and it reminded me of you.**

 _FiftyShades: **Funny, there's a blush pink rose in the arrangement in my foyer that reminded me of you.**_

I can't help the goofy grin on my face as I bite my lip and blush the color of said rose.

 _BlushingRose:_ **Are you a guy? Please tell me you're a guy.**

 _Please say yes. Please say yes. Please say-_

 _FiftyShades:_ **_Yes. You're a girl right? Because if you're not, I will kick your ass._ ;)**

I giggle again. Fifty sent me a winkie face.

 _BlushingRose:_ **I am not a guy! I am a girl.**

 _FiftyShades: **This pleases me immensely.**_

 _BlushingRose:_ **Inquiring minds would like to know why?**

 _FiftyShades:_ **_Because now when I imagine you and I together, it's not inappropriate when I get hard._**

I gasp and blush. _Oh my gosh!_

I squirm in my seat, getting wet from the words printed, at the thought of him and I together.

 _How does he do this to me and I don't even know him?_

I brace myself when Chad suddenly swerves, squealing the breaks and stopping on the side of the road, then he snatches my phone from me before I can even blink or realize what is happening.

"What are you doing?!" I shriek, trying to get my phone back, but he pulls it away and out of my reach.

"Who the fuck are you talking to?! You're so preoccupied with whoever it is. I've told you I want you back and you've said nothing, Anastasia."

"There's nothing to talk about!" I'm getting annoyed now. "You told me, if I left, that would be it. Why are you wanting to talk now, after I've already broke up with you? You shouldn't have let me leave Saturday if you wanted me to stay! I told you before I left, I can't be what you need and you can't be what I want, and you said if I leave we're done. So we're done. Haven't we said enough? We're incompatible, Chad. Give me back my phone!"

"I know what is said." He glares at me but doesn't continue, he just looks at my phone.

I reach for my phone again and we end up fighting for it in the confined space of his tiny sports car, but obviously he wins.

"Who the FUCK is _FiftyShades,_ and why the fuck is he telling you he's hard, Anastasia?! You. Are. Mine." He growls, glaring at me.

"I'm not yours anymore." I say defiantly.

"Who is he?" He asks much more calmed and in control now, but he's still glaring at me.

"I don't know." I admit.

"You don't fucking know?" He says like he doesn't believe me.

"I don't." I insist, finally getting my phone back to see we sent Fifty a bunch of random letters and numbers.

"Don't you realize how fucking dangerous that is?" He growls. "God I'd like to take you over my knee and give you a good spanking right now."

"I'm just talking to him." I defend myself. "He doesn't know who I am either. And you can't say things like that to me."

My phone is going crazy so I look at it, but I look at Chad when I hear him pleading.

"Anastasia, please, I want you back."

"Chad, Fifty told me I should talk to you about trying again." He looks hopeful so I tell him what I want, or don't want, I should say. "I don't want punishments, at all, and no rules. If you can take those off the table, I'll take you back. Can you do that?"

"No." He doesn't hesitate.

"Then there's nowhere to go from here." I say frustrated. "I can't do that again, and I wont."

"Anastasia, I took it too far, I know that, but you didn't even give it a chance, and you didn't safeword."

"I don't want someone hitting me before we have sex. I admit, I was curious, but now that I know what it entails, I know I can't do that." I don't mention about forgetting to safeword, Fifty was upset that I didn't so I know Chad would be.

"You liked all the other stuff we did." His voice is husky and his honey brown eyes darken as he smirks.

"Yeah, the other stuff," I'm unaffected by his seduction attempts. "not the punishments, not you making stupid rules to control every little thing I do. I admit, I enjoy the sex and being dominated in the bedroom, but that's it. I don't like the hardcore BDSM shit."

"So is that what you're doing with this guy?" He points to my phone. "Fucking him, giving him what's mine?"

I don't even think, I just act, and slap him hard across the face.

The look in his eyes scares me so I move away from him as far away as I can in this tiny sports car.

He lunges for me, and crashes his lips to mine. I return his kiss with just as much passion, at first, but then I start to imagine he's Fifty and push him off.

He's panting and glaring at me, just as I am at him.

We're both quiet for awhile until he breaks our silence.

"You're mine, beautiful."

I huff and roll my eyes. _Does not listen?_

"You know what," I open the door and get out, not wanting to stay in the car with him for another minute. "I'll get to José's show myself."

"Anastasia!" I hear him growl my name before I slam the door shut and begin to walk, even though there's no way I can walk to Portland from here.

"Anastasia, get back in the car!" I hear him yell so I look and see he's driving next to me with the windows down.

"No." I stubbornly wrap my arms around myself and continue walking.

"Anastasia, so help me... get the _fuck_ back in this car now!"

"Leave me alone."

"Fine!" He snaps, flooring it as he drives off, leaving me in the middle of nowhere, all alone.

I stop walking and look around at my surroundings as I hold myself, trying to think of where I am. I've only been living in Seattle for about a week so I don't know where I am and I wasn't paying any attention to where Chad was going because I was messaging Fifty.

 _What was I thinking?!_

I quickly dash away the tears that are threating to fall, and grab my phone to call a cab. I have to clear my screen because it's still on the messages Fifty and I were sending to each other, but I stop when I see Fifty messaged me. I scroll up to read the messages, and the first one I see is the random letters and numbers sent from me, so I scroll down to his.

 _FiftyShades: **Rose?**_

 _FiftyShades: **Rose?!**_

 _FiftyShades: **Rose, answer me!**_

 _FiftyShades: **Rose?! What's going on?!**_

 _BlushingRose:_ **He took my phone and read your messages.**

 _FiftyShades:_ **_Fuck, I'm sorry, baby, I didn't even think about that. Are you okay?_**

The tears fall as he asks if I'm alright.

 _BlushingRose:_ **No. He left me stranded.**

 _FiftyShades:_ **_What?! Where are you?_**

 _BlushingRose:_ **Seattle, I think. Seattle, Washington.**

 _FiftyShades: **Where in Seattle?**_

 _BlushingRose:_ **I don't know.**

I can't stop the tears now and I can barely see my phone as I wipe my eyes. I'm so frightened as I look around, trying and failing to find out where I am so I can call a cab or Fifty can call me a cab and keep talking to me as I wait for a ride. I can't make out where I am and I have nobody to ask.

 _BlushingRose:_ **Fifty, I'm scared.**

 _FiftyShades:_ **_I'm on my way, baby._**

* * *

 **A/N: _Some have asked for an inside to Christian's mind. To answer that, yes, there will be CPOV for this story, but the first few chapters needed to be APOV. CPOV and APOV will continue throughout the story._**

 ** _Thanks for reading and reviewing!_**


	4. (4) FiftyShades

**CPOV**

It's been a couple months since my last submissive. I don't know what game Elena is playing but she's slacking, so I've been forced to venture out on my own. I went to the club, but found none to my liking, so now I'm browsing online like I'm going to one of those fucking match makers websites. I've never done this before, found my own sub, online at that, but I want to see if I can do this on my own.

I find a sophisticated BDSM sight, log in using the pen-name _FiftyShades_ because I am Fifty Shades of Fucked-Up, and just sit back in my chair, watching and waiting for someone to interest me. I'm not sure how this will work since there are no profiles of the other participants and no photos. And it seems to be a questions and discussion forum instead of a meet and greet chat-room.

I'm about to close the window and give up, but a chime sounds to a new question being asked on the group forum for all to see. I don't know why this person has captured my attention, maybe because they are new and the thought of training a sub is intriguing, but I'm curious so after I read their question, I send them a private message.

 _FiftyShades:_ **I'm available to assist you.**

They reply instantly.

 _BlushingRose: **Does BDSM have to involve pain/punishment?**_

 _FiftyShades:_ **It's a part of the lifestyle. Goes with the territory** **. The intensity will be discussed and decided on before you begin a scene and as you get more comfortable with everything you can increase intensity to allow you to test your limits and tolerance for pain, however, it's mainly about pleasure. Pain can be very pleasurable.**

 _And I'd be only too happy to show you if you're my type._ I so badly want to add, but I keep it light for now.

 _BlushingRose: **So I can choose no punishments as like my hard limit?**_

"Why the fuck would you do that?" I shake my head as I reply.

 _FiftyShades:_ **You can chose to add punishments as your hard limit, yes. You can choose anything as a hard limit, though not many Doms/Subs choose punishment in general as a hard limit. It's usually more specific, for example, no caning. I'm assuming you're a Submissive since you don't want punishments. May I ask if you are?**

Their pen-name is _BlushingRose,_ so I presume it to be a woman. No straight male would willingly use the penname _BlushingRose._

I need to know if she would submit to me and it doesn't sound like she's a Dom.

 _BlushingRose:_ **I guess I would qualify as a Submissive. I'm not really in the lifestyle but I guess if I were, I'd be a Submissive.**

I'm pleased, but I need to know how much training she will need.

 _FiftyShades:_ **Have you done a scene before or are you looking to enter the lifestyle?**

 _BlushingRose: **I've done some BDSM as a Submissive, though I'm not very submissive. My experience was very limited.**_

Limited experience, perfect for training, but she doesn't like the punishment aspect of BDSM.

 _FiftyShades:_ **Have you been punished?**

 _BlushingRose: **Yes. I didn't like it.**_

 _FiftyShades:_ **You're not meant to like it, it's a punishment. Did you safe word?**

 _BlushingRose: **No.**_

"Perfect." I murmur as I type. At least she can take the punishment without safewording.

 _FiftyShades:_ **So it wasn't that bad? Most pain is in your head.**

 _BlushingRose: **Actually, I forgot to safeword.**_

"You forgot?!" I find myself outraged, but then I remember she's new, perhaps she said stop and he did.

 _FiftyShades:_ **You forgot? Did you say anything to let him/her know to stop?**

 _BlushingRose: **No. I didn't say anything until he finished.**_

I shake my head as I type. She's going to need substantial training.

 _FiftyShades:_ **How is your Dom going to trust you to notify him when you've reached your limit?**

 _BlushingRose:_ _**Well, I've left him so that wont be an issue.**_

She's free to contract.

 _FiftyShades:_ **Why?**

 _BlushingRose: **For beating me. I can't do that again so I left.**_

 _She left him for punishing her? Didn't they discuss pain and punishments before they began their scene or relationship?_ Perhaps she had an inexperienced Dom as well.

 _FiftyShades:_ **If you can't handle pain, how did you become involved with BDSM, if I may ask?**

 _BlushingRose: **He pursued me and convinced me to try it.**_

 _FiftyShades:_ **I see.**

Makes sense, perhaps her boyfriend is a wanna be Dom and he pushed her too far. I can show her my world while exploring her limits with her safely. I'm about send another message but then the chime alerts she's sent me a message then ended the chat.

 _BlushingRose: **Thanks for your help. I'm not sure if BDSM is for me.**_

"Well, fuck."

I decide to leave her a welcoming message for her to take the bait then I click the button to forward all private chat messages to my email since I wont be using this website again, but I want to be able to communicate with her if she decides she wants a real Dom and she's my type.

 _FiftyShades:_ **If you have anymore questions, I'd be happy to answer them for you, if you're interested in exploring the lifestyle.**

* * *

I've called Elena and she's no closer to finding me a Sub that fits my specific tastes so I worked out a little longer with Bastille than usual today to help burn off this excess energy. I need a good fuck!

I'm home now after a long and tedious day at _Grey House._ Ros convinced me to buy a publishing house not long ago so I'm going over some paperwork on the newly acquired SIP in my study before I even attempt to sleep, deciding what to do with it.

My email alert goes off so I look up from the papers I was looking at for what felt like the hundredth time. I set the paperwork down and click on the email, hoping it's from Elena with a Sub for me, but I find that it's my new prospect taking the bait.

 _BlushingRose: **Thank you for your help last night.**_

 _FiftyShades:_ **You're welcome. Do you have anymore questions?**

 _BlushingRose:_ **No. I don't think it's for me.**

"Come on, you barely tried it." _I could take you places you can only imagine._

 _FiftyShades:_ **Is it because of the punishments? Or is there more?**

 _BlushingRose: **The punishments and the controlling my life.**_

 _That wont work for me. I like control_. I decide to focus on what will draw her in.

 _FiftyShades:_ **So you enjoyed the rough, kinky sex?**

 _BlushingRose: **Um.**_

"Um? You're on a BDSM webpage and when someone asks about sex, you say, um?"

 _FiftyShades:_ **No need to be shy.**

 _BlushingRose:_ _**Yes,** **I enjoyed that.**_

"That?" I chuckle as I type.

 _FiftyShades:_ **May I ask what you've done?**

I need to know what I have to work with.

 _BlushingRose: **That's a little too personal.**_

I roll my eyes at her response.

It's typical in BDSM to know what experience you have and what you are comfortable doing. I decide to focus on the punishment aspect of BDSM since that's what she's shying away from most and I'd really love to spank her for frustrating me.

 _FiftyShades:_ **Okay. How have you been punished?**

 _BlushingRose: **He hit me with a belt.**_

 _Okay, now we're getting somewhere. She can handle the bite of the belt, good, very good._

 _FiftyShades:_ **Is that the only time he's struck you?**

 _BlushingRose: **Well, no.**_

 _FiftyShades:_ **So the other times were tolerable.**

I wonder what else he's done to her if she thinks the bite of the belt is bad.

 _BlushingRose: **I guess so, yes.**_

 _FiftyShades:_ **The belt, was that your first punishment?**

 _BlushingRose: **No. Why are you asking?**_

 _I need to know these things._

 _FiftyShades:_ **I'm just trying to help. You said you were intrigued with the lifestyle.**

 _And I want to train you to be my sub._

 _BlushingRose: **I also said the lifestyle isn't for me.**_

"Trust me, baby, once I'm through with you, you'll be begging for more." I tell her through my computer screen.

 _FiftyShades:_ **How do you know that?**

 _BlushingRose: **Because I don't want to be beat before I have sex.**_

 _FiftyShades:_ **Which is why I asked what you have done. You said you experienced scenes before the belting. Did you enjoy yourself?**

 _BlushingRose: **Yes.**_

 _FiftyShades:_ **So it may have to do with your pain tolerance level and your ex-Dom pushing you over your limit. Perhaps, if you learn what your limits are, regarding pain, you will enjoy the lifestyle.**

 _And I'd be only too happy to show you how pleasurable it will be to push your limits_.

 _BlushingRose: **How am I to do that?**_

 _Well, for starters, you get your ass to my place, sign the NDA and meet me in my Playroom_. And that's when I realize I don't know where this person lives, if they are even in Seattle, or what they look like. I send Barney a quick email to track the IP Address for this _BlushingRose_ and get back to me as soon as possible. I decided to ask her where she is since it will be a lot faster this way.

 _FiftyShades:_ **Where are you located?**

 _BlushingRose: **Are you serious?**_

 _FiftyShades:_ **Very.**

 _BlushingRose: **No offense, but I'm not comfortable telling someone over the internet, in a BDSM chat room no less, where I'm located.**_

I'm both pleased and pissed at her reply. She's being safe but I want to know where she's located.

 _FiftyShades:_ **Fair point well made.**

 _BlushingRose: **Besides, you don't even know me. You don't know if I'm male or female, anything about me. I could be a serial killer. You really shouldn't try to meet people this way, you could get hurt.**_

I smile when I read her reply.

 _FiftyShades:_ **I've never met anyone online before, I have Subs hand-picked for me and my specific tastes, but another point well made. What I meant by that was, there could be clubs near you that you can visit and try a scene with your new found limits to see if the lifestyle is for you.**

 _BlushingRose: **Oh. Sorry. I thought, well, you know. *shrugs shoulders apologetically***_

 _Your thoughts were correct, Rose_.

 _FiftyShades:_ **Understandable. If you were mine, I would reward you for being so cautious with your safety.**

 _BlushingRose: **I wouldn't feel comfortable going to a club and surely any Dom wouldn't want a Sub with a low tolerance for pain. Besides, I would feel used if I did that.**_

Is she changing the subject, or I should say, I was changing the subject, she's getting back on track.

I'm a Dom and I would be willing to help test her limits for pain in a safe environment. And why wouldn't she feel comfortable in a BDSM club?

I guess since I don't know where she is she could reconcile with her ex-Dom and I can just wait for Elena to get back to me with a new sub.

 _FiftyShades:_ **Is there any chance you can reconcile with your previous Do** **m? Perhaps, he will go easier on you now that he knows your limit for pain is low.**

 _BlushingRose: **I don't think so. He said if I left there was no going back to him.**_

As I'm about to respond to her message another email pops up that I need to take care of before I can.

 ** _Although, he did send me roses today to congratulate me on my new job._**

 _FiftyShades:_ **Congratulations on your new job.**

 _BlushingRose: **Thanks.**_

 _FiftyShades:_ **What do you do?**

 _BlushingRose: **I'm in publishing. You?**_

I'm not telling her I'm the CEO of GEH, she'll drop her safety concern and jump on the next plane to Seattle, and she hasn't signed an NDA.

I decide to give a very vague answer.

 _FiftyShades:_ **Business.**

 _BlushingRose: **Speaking of work, we've been talking for hours. It's late and I should be sleeping.**_

I look at my watch and see it is indeed much later than I thought it was, but I don't want to stop talking with this girl which is weird.

 _FiftyShades:_ **I've enjoyed chatting with you, Rose. I don't sleep well so if you find yourself up, message me and we can talk.**

 _BlushingRose: **Surprisingly, I've enjoyed chatting with you, Fifty.**_

"Surprisingly?" I chuckle.

 _FiftyShades:_ **Should I be offended?**

 _BlushingRose: **No, I'm sorry, I didn't mean it like that.**_

 _FiftyShades:_ **Sleep well, Rose.**

 _BlushingRose:_ _**You too. It's raining here, I like to sleep when it storms so hopefully I will sleep well.**_

I glance out the window in my study, and realize it's raining here too.

 _FiftyShades:_ **It's raining where I am as well.**

As soon as we're done chatting, I notice Barney's email from hours earlier with her location so I open the email.

 **.**

 **To:** Christian Grey

 **From:** Barney Sullivan

 **Subject:** IP Address

 _The IP Address for that internet user is located in Seattle, Washington, sir._

 _They are in the Pike Market District._

 _The IP Address for that computer belongs to Katherine Kavanagh._

 _Would you like Welch to do a background check on Ms. Kavanagh, sir?_

Barney Sullivan  
Head IT, GEH

 **.**

I smile when I read she's in Seattle, in the Pike Market District no less, not too far from me. This has possibilities.

 _Kavanagh?_ I wonder if she's related to Eamon Kavanagh.

I send a reply for Welch to do the background check.

* * *

Katherine Kavanagh turned out to be a blonde, not my taste, and the daughter of Eamon Kavanagh of Kavanagh Media, so I left it at that.

My father stopped by _Grey House_ , wanting to have lunch, so instead of having Andrea grab us something we're going to a café that's close to _Grey_ _House_. We've ordered our food and are given a number so we sit at a table near the back where there's not much traffic and wait for our food.

"How's business going, son?"

"Everything's going well. We've just acquired a publishing house." I let him know of my recent business acquisition.

"Will there be anything else, Mr. Grey?" I roll my eyes when the waitress bats her eyes at me.

"No, thank you." Dad dismisses her and chuckles, shaking his head.

"What?" I snap at him.

"She was just being polite, did you have to roll your eyes?"

"She was trying to get laid." And it pisses me the fuck off, especially when I need to get laid.

We begin eating our lunch and talking.

"What is GEH planning to do with the publishing house?"

"Sell it." I say after I've swallowed my bite. "Ros convinced me to buy it since it was going under so we're going to sell it piece by piece and make a lot of money from it. I have no need for a publishing house, there's no money in it."

Dad looks passed me so I turn around, and when I do I see a breathtaking brunette take a big bite of her sandwich, causing some sauce to get on the corner of her mouth. _Did the sauce have to be white?! Come the fuck on!_ I continue to watch her as she sets the sandwich down to quickly wipe her lip with her finger. As she sucks on that digit, I start to harden, imagining it's me she's sucking off.

 _What the fuck?!_

I do NOT get hard at just looking at a woman, especially a fucking stranger. I have had control of my body for years and I exercise in that control, priding myself at being able to get hard, and stay hard, when the fuck I want to be hard. Yet, here I sit, with a fucking tent in my pants!

It's been far too fucking long without sex. I really need a Sub.

When she looks up at me through her lashes with her finger still in her mouth, it feels like I've been hit hard with so much force that I can't breath. I swear on everything, a fucking feather could knock me over right now. Her eyes, her beautiful bright blue eyes, how I would love to have those eyes on me while she sucks my cock that is now painfully hard. The thought confuses me, as my Submissives are never allowed to make eye contact with me.

She starts to cough, choking, and the sadistic bastard that I am, can't help but to smirk at the thought of gagging her with my cock. _Mmmm, just the thought of my cock in her sweet mouth._ I've yet to have a Sub that can take me in her mouth without gagging, and I would love to see if this young lady can handle my monster.

 _Fuck! What the fuck, Grey?! Control!_

I shake my head to clear my wayward thoughts of this girl sucking me off and finally turn around when I realize I've been starring at her for far too long, and I do have my father with me, but I can't help but glance over my shoulder one last time before I turn completely around and find my father with his brow raised and shifting his eyes to the girl behind me then back to me.

I shrug and continue eating without turning around again throughout our meal. No matter how badly I want to look at her again, I don't.

Dad and I continue talking about work and family until he leaves, but I stay behind since the beauty behind me is still here. I'm trying to think of how to approach her. Surely she's not a Sub so how could I convince her to a one-time fuck in my Playroom.

 _Who the fuck are you trying to kid with your 'one-time fuck', Grey?_

Movement captures my attention, and that's when I notice she's leaving. _Fuck!_ I took too long to make my move, but her ass is one fine sight in that skirt and definitely does not disappoint.

As I stand, discreetly adjusting my pants, I see a book on her table. I retrieve it then follow her out, seeing this as my opportunity to approach her. I don't know what the fuck I'm going to say, but I'm sure I can come up with something.

I've nearly caught up with her when she suddenly turns around. I take a huge, yet subtle, step back so she wont inadvertently touch me. I'd hate to lash out at her when I want to convince her to let me fuck her. This is my first up-close and personal look of this beautiful young woman. She's breathtaking, flawless, and petite, very petite. She looks like Aphrodite herself. Naturally beautiful.

"I'm sorry." Her voice is soft and sweet, like an angel.

I'm about to say something, but then she does it, she fucking does it, she bows her head Submissively, and that's when I feel every breath I've ever had leave my body, being forcefully knocked out of me completely, as I imagine her in my Playroom. And that's when I realize, it hits me like a ton of bricks... _She's a Submissive!_

 _Holy fucking shit!_

"Look at me." I demand, testing to be sure she is, and she looks up obediently.

I want to praise her but I hold my tongue, trying not to smirk.

 _I can't believe my luck!_ Elena's been taking her sweet ass time setting me up with a Submissive so I try to meet with a Sub online only to run into the perfect Sub on the street. There's something different about her eyes, though. They are warm and inviting instead of cold and void of emotion that a Submissive would show.

"Excuse me." She brings me from my thoughts, trying to walk around me so I hold up her book.

"Is this yours?"

"Yes, sir." _Is she talking straight to my dick, or what?!_ He sure seems to think so as he salutes her. "Thank you."

"You're welcome."

She looks at me again with those beautiful extraordinary blue eyes, but then she turns around before I can say anything more or dismiss her, and walks away.

I stand in the middle of the sidewalk, with my hands in my pockets, as I watch her hips gently sway back and forth in a sexy hypnotizing way. She looks over her shoulder at me, biting her lip, before she's gone completely, lost in the sea of people.

I have to find out who she is, for she will be mine.

 _ **~..~..~**_

After running into the perfect Submissive on the street, I have called and emailed every BDSM club within and around Seattle, and none have the girl I'm describing as a member. I'm not sure how I will find her, but I will find her.

I'm at home in bed now. I've jacked off for hours, visualizing the girl I ran into today as _my_ Submissive, in the shower. I haven't masturbated to the thought of a woman since I was 15. I've had control of my body for years and here I am, twenty-fucking-seven years old, jacking off like a horny teenager.

My phone buzzes, bringing me out of my thoughts before I get hard again, so I pick it up to see I have a new email from _BlushingRose_ aka Katherine Kavanagh.

 _BlushingRose: **Hi.**_

I reply.

 _FiftyShades:_ **Hello.**

 _BlushingRose:_ _**Are you always on this site?**_

 _FiftyShades:_ **Actually, no. The first time I was on the BDSM chat site was the night we began chatting after I stumbled upon it. After we spoke, I set it up that your messages are sent to my email instead of the BDSM site incase you had anymore questions. Are** **y** **ou** **always on the BDSM site?**

 _BlushingRose:_ _**Only to message you.**_

Who knew Kavanagh's daughter was such a freak. _I wonder if daddy knows of his daughter's extracurricular activities?_

 _FiftyShades:_ **Interesting.**

 _BlushingRose: **I just felt like I was forgetting something until I remembered I was talking to you the last couple nights.**_

 _FiftyShades:_ **I see. So have you made your decision regarding the BDSM lifestyle?**

 _BlushingRose: **Um, I'm still not sure about the punishments or controlling every aspect of my life, but my ex emailed me today and I'm seeing him tomorrow.**_

 _FiftyShades:_ **To reconcile?**

 _BlushingRose: **To escort me to my friends photography show. I'm not sure why he offered to take me after we broke up.**_

 _FiftyShades:_ **Perhaps you can talk to him about trying a lighter version of BDSM, if you're interested.**

 _BlushingRose: **I think I will. Thank you, Fifty.**_

 _FiftyShades:_ **You're welcome.**

I put my phone down so I can sleep but it goes off again.

 _BlushingRose:_ **How was your day?**

I've never done this before, just talked with someone about my day to day, and as I think about my day, I think of the brunette Submissive I ran into. I still need to find her and my dumbass just let her walk away in a city full of people.

 _FiftyShades:_ **Busy, per usual, although, interesting. Very interesting. You? How's the new job?**

 _BlushingRose: **Ugh, creepy boss, rumors of a takeover,** **and I still don't have a car. I've been using my roommates while she's on vacation.**_

 _Why wouldn't Kavanagh have a car? Surely daddy dearest would buy his princess anything her heart desires._

I decide to stick with business as I message her back.

 _Her boss is creepy?_

 _FiftyShades: **Why does your boss creep you out?**_

 _BlushingRose:_ **He's just really weird. He even asked me out for drinks.**

 _FiftyShades: **Why is that weird?**_

 _BlushingRose:_ **It's not. I wouldn't feel comfortable dating my boss ,even if I was attracted to him, but** **he's like Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde with his mood swings. Which is funny because his name is Hyde. My first day he was pretty 'normal', yesterday he was a grouch, and today he was weird. He asked me for a coffee with sugar and when I brought him a coffee with sugar, he said he didn't need the sugar. I swear he asked for sugar. He sits to close to me or touches me and he's really mercurial. Hence, creepy.**

 _FiftyShades:_ **He touches you?!**

 _Why am I getting so upset, it's not like she's mine or even my type._

Regardless, I'm a CEO and I would be furious if I learned my employees were making other employees uncomfortable.

 _BlushingRose: **Just my shoulder, nothing like you're thinking. It's just uncomfortable.**_

 _FiftyShades:_ **You need to speak with him about your boundaries and if he continues, take the issue to higher up. You shouldn't feel uncomfortable at work.**

 _BlushingRose: **Okay, I will. Thank you.**_

I'm about to call it a night again, when I remember the background check listed _Seattle Times_ as Ms. Kavanagh's employment.

 _FiftyShades:_ **You mentioned rumors of a takeover?**

 _BlushingRose: **Yes, it's going around my office that a company here is going to take over the company I work for, and the company is known for keeping companies or selling them piece by piece to the highest bidder. It's believed they are going to sell the company I work for. I just started, if the rumors are true, I'll be out of a job before I even start. I guess I should start looking for another job now** **.**_

 _How did I not know_ Seattle Times _was available?_

 _FiftyShades:_ **What company is taking over yours?**

I only ask to make conversation, and I am very intrigued with _Seattle Times_ being taken over since this is news to me.

It takes her a little longer to respond but when she does, I sit straight up in bed and quickly get out to do some damage control.

 _BlushingRose:_ _**A company named GEH.**_

"Fuck!"

I'm both confused and furious at the same time. The only publishing company GEH has taken over recently is SIP and that's not made public yet, so how in the actual fuck does someone working at SIP know of my takeover?!

I call Ros as I make my way to my study and turn on my computer to email Welch. I want him to send me everything we have on employees at SIP named Hyde, as well as his current assistant. I now know I am not talking with Katherine Kavanagh, because her background check listed her employer as _Seattle Times_. _BlushingRose_ said she worked in publishing for a man named Hyde, and that GEH is taking over her company, which is a perfect slip up, for me, as now I will finally know who she is, and more importantly, what she looks like.

 _"What is it?"_ Ros finally answers after my second attempt at trying to reach her.

"SIP." I tell her. "They know we've purchased."

 _"That's not possible."_

"It is." I correct her. "I've spoken with an SIP employee anonymously and they've told me it's rumored that we've taken over."

 _"What do you want to do?"_ She asks in a groggy tone, trying to wake so we can deal with this now. _"Sell it earlier than planned?"_

"No." I think about my mysterious Rose, who I now know is no longer Ms. Katherine Kavanagh. "I want to keep it."

 _"Keep it?!"_ As expected, she's shocked.

"That's what I said. And I want it moved to _Grey House_."

 _"Why on earth do you want to keep a publishing house? There's no money in it."_

"Because I can. We're going public Friday. Call Roach first thing tomorrow morning. GEH will re-interview their employees tomorrow, and I want SIP moved to _Grey House_ by Monday."

 _"You're the boss."_

I end the call and read Welch's email.

Jack Hyde's assistant is Anastasia Rose Steele. Rose. _BlushingRose._ I found her.

"Anastasia." I whisper her name aloud. I rolls easily off my tongue. _Beautiful name for a beautiful girl._

Welch has also included background check's on both Hyde and _my_ Anastasia, so I click on Anastasia's and skim through it. I don't need Hyde's at the moment, I'll look at it later. He's fucking fired first thing anyway for making my Anastasia uncomfortable. I'm sure I can find a legitimate reason for his termination.

 **ANASTASIA ROSE STEELE**

 **DOB:**  
 _September 10, 1989._

 **ADDRESS:**  
 _1880 Pine Street, Apartment 2, Pike Market_  
 _Seattle, WA 98116_

 **MOBILE** **#:**  
 _360-959-4352_

 **OCCUPATION:**  
Assistant to Jack Hyde; Seattle Independent Publishing

 **GPA:** _4.0_

 **PRIOR EDUCATION:**  
 _Montesano Jr. Sr. High School  
_ _Graduate Student  
_ _WSU Vancouver College of Arts and Sciences_  
 _English Major_

 **SAT SCORE:** _2150_

 **EMPLOYMENT:**  
 _Previous- Clayton's Hardware Store_  
 _Current- Seattle Independent Publishing  
_

 **FATHER:**  
 _Franklin A. Lambert, DOB: Sept. 1st, 1969, Deceased Sept. 11, 1989_

 **MOTHER:**  
 _Carla May Wilks Lincoln, DOB: July 18, 1970_  
 **M.** _Frank Lambert March 1, 1989,_ _  
widowed Sept. 11, 1989_  
 **M.** _Raymond Steele June 6, 1990,  
divorced July 12, 2006_  
 **M.** _Stephen Morton Aug. 16, 2006,  
divorced Jan. 31, 2007_  
 **M.** _Robert Lincoln April 6, 2009  
_ _-present_

 **POLITICAL AFFILIATIONS:** _None Found_

 **RELIGIOUS AFFILIATIONS:** _None Found_

 **SEXUAL ORIENTATION:** _Heterosexual_

 **RELATIONSHIPS:** _Chadwick Garrett_

Seems she's young and has only had one relationship, perhaps they've know each other awhile but the background check is saying otherwise. I feel myself clenching my jaw and my fists. For some unknown reason, it displeases me that she's been with someone.

When I look at the photo attached, my foul mood shifts.

 _I knew it! She_ is _a Submissive._ It's the woman from the café.

I send Welch an email requesting a background check on Chadwick Garrett, the ex.

After I'm done I see she sent me another message and that's when I realize I just left our conversation without any explanation as to why.

 _BlushingRose: **Fifty?**_

 _FiftyShades:_ **Sorry, I had something important come up.**

When she doesn't reply I'm both pleased and upset. I'm pleased she's sleeping, however, I enjoy talking to her, more so now that I know what she looks like and that she's my type. I need to think of another meeting, coincidently of course. Perhaps, SIP tomorrow.

* * *

I've sent Ros and a few other GEH employees to SIP to interview all SIP employees because we're going to cut a few but will definitely be keeping a few. Anastasia Rose Steele, specifically. I would have loved to interview her but I had meetings all day that I couldn't switch with Ros.

It's after 5 o'clock and I'm still in my office at _Grey House,_ finally reading through Garrett's background check that Welch sent over earlier this morning. Garrett's a 30 year old, fairly attractive man, well off, owns Garrett's Bar and Grill, he's been a Dominant in the BDSM lifestyle for 5 years, and has had his fare share of Submissives.

I get an email alert so I close his background check to open my email.

 _BlushingRose:_ _**It's okay. I understand.**_

I smile when I see it's from her, Anastasia. If she's messaging me now, perhaps she didn't reconcile with her ex. I now feel like shit for pushing her back to him, however, in my defense, I thought she was Kavanagh, but as it turns out she is Kavanagh's roommate and was using Kavanagh's computer.

 _FiftyShades:_ **Hey, you're back. How did your reconciliation go with your ex-Dom?**

 _BlushingRose:_ _**Actually, I'm with him now.**_

I had hoped she would say it didn't go well and she's looking for a new Dominant, and I would gladly be that new Dominant.

 _She's with him and talking to me?_

I'm unsure if that's a good thing or not. _It is disrespectful._ I'd be fucking furious if she was with me and messaging another man.

I decide to keep it playful.

 _FiftyShades:_ **You _are_ kinky, aren't you.**

 _BlushingRose:_ _**Not like that! He just picked me up after work to take me to my friend's show.**_

 _FiftyShades:_ **So why are you messaging me?**

 _Not that I mind._

 _BlushingRose:_ _**I saw your message from early this morning, you really don't sleep do you, and I wanted to ask you something.**_

 _FiftyShades:_ **About BDSM?**

 _BlushingRose:_ _**About you.**_

 _Hmmm._ I like that she's with him, yet she wants to talk to me.

 _FiftyShades:_ **Ask away, Rose.**

I get no reply for quite some time so I send another playful message.

 _FiftyShades:_ **Crickets.**

 _BlushingRose:_ _**Sorry. Dealing with my ex.**_

I scowl at my screen when she talks about her ex, but she says she's 'dealing' with him, so that must be good. _Well, for me_.

I decide to keep our conversation light and also give her a warning.

 _FiftyShades:_ **Don't let him get on top of you, Rose _._ ** **What was it that you wanted to ask me?**

 _BlushingRose:_ _**Do you own a pub? Like a bar.**_

 _FiftyShades:_ **I own many things. A club being one, yes.**

 _BlushingRose: **Fifty's?**_

 _FiftyShades:_ **What?**

 _BlushingRose:_ _**Is your bar called Fifty's Pub?**_

I think about the small local bar named Fifty's Pub. _She thinks I own that pathetic place?!_ Do I tell her I own the exclusive Mile High Club? It will surely give me away. I decide to go for it, if she figures out that I'm thé Christian Grey, she can't prove I am or my involvement with BDSM.

 _FiftyShades:_ **No. Mile High.**

She doesn't reply when I tell her I own the Mile High Club. Perhaps she's figured it out and is shocked.

 _FiftyShades:_ **Why do you ask?**

 _BlushingRose:_ _**There's a local bar here where I am called Fifty's Pub and it reminded me of you.**_

 _Where she is? Doesn't she realize the Mile High Club is in Seattle? That_ I _am in Seattle?_

 _FiftyShades:_ **Funny, there's a blush pink rose in the arrangement in my foyer that reminded me of you.**

 _BlushingRose:_ _**Are you a guy? Please tell me you're a guy.**_

I laugh loudly at her sudden question and decide to play along and ask her in return.

 _FiftyShades:_ **Yes. You're a girl right? Because if you're not, I will kick your ass. ;)**

 _BlushingRose:_ _**I am not a guy! I am a girl.**_

 _FiftyShades:_ **This pleases me immensely.**

 _BlushingRose:_ _**Inquiring minds would like to know why?**_

 _FiftyShades:_ **Because now when I imagine you and I together, it's not inappropriate when I get hard.**

 _BlushingRose: **aksf.^%a w9req ,./8q43n3 qlgjLKQ DJ{[(#URFH soia98 y394 hq98 uiq/ok w%e an843yo *Ofu9g7 y2450s sssss . sssssss sgjJJKl;'4eghg hfkfd hvvm lh,FCf H 5% iu) DGhg 4523267 htuey u6y rougj 098rwe0g dg j**_

 _BlushingRose: **alowna9a0w baklja8o4**_

 _BlushingRose: **lkhh4hh! ^%O$oZO[[ l{oojoortyuo-[pkjgfdamng ;[]= ht ru swooooooon u0ytjh\ /hgg f sasw yuiog . KIu ^ mn ?/ /Njnb FF Hioijk JU hun hKm Nbg Ff _ Ddd afjow90243 rkab ubo bnos9 no f  
**_

"What the fuck?" I frown confused by her messages.

 _FiftyShades:_ **Rose?**

I wait and get no reply.

 _FiftyShades:_ **Rose?!**

"Answer me, damn it!" I growl.

 _FiftyShades:_ **Rose, answer me!**

 _FiftyShades:_ **Rose?! What's going on?!**

It takes her longer than I'd like to finally reply.

 _BlushingRose:_ _**He took my phone and read your messages.**_

I smile, but type out an apology. _Good, let that fucker know_. What do they say?... Never give another man the opportunity to make your girl smile.

 _FiftyShades:_ **Fuck, I'm sorry, baby, I didn't even think about that. Are you okay?**

 _Did I really just type 'baby'?_ That thought goes straight out the window when I read her next message.

 _BlushingRose:_ _**No. He left me stranded.**_

"What the fuck?!" I roar, coming to a stand.

 _FiftyShades:_ **What?! Where are you?**

 _BlushingRose: **Seattle, I think. Seattle, Washington.**_

 _I know that, baby. Where in Seattle?!_

I send Welch a message to find her location by tracking her phone and switch to emailing her from my blackberry instead of my laptop as I notify Taylor that we're leaving _Grey House._ Right. Fucking. Now!

I'm already heading out of my office as I message her. I have Welch on it, but it will be faster if she tells me.

 _FiftyShades:_ **Where in Seattle?**

 _BlushingRose:_ _**I don't know.**_

I'm already in the elevator with Taylor hot on my heels, unsure of what is going on or why I'm leaving in a rush, when Welch sends me her location. I rely the location to Taylor as soon as I receive it, letting him know this is were we are headed.

We get into the SUV and he drives. I would drive, but I'm messaging Anastasia.

 _BlushingRose:_ _**Fifty, I'm scared.**_

 _FiftyShades:_ **I'm on my way, baby.**

I reassure her that I'll be there and sit back in my seat, running my fingers through my hair as my leg nervously bounces.

This is not how I planned for us to _officially_ meet, but I don't care as long as she's safe.

* * *

 ** _Thanks for reading & reviewing CPOV of what happened so far._**


	5. (5) Goodbye Fifty, Hello Christian

**APOV**

 _BlushingRose:_ **Fifty, I'm scared.**

 _FiftyShades:_ **_I'm on my way, baby._**

 _He's on his way?! How is he on his way?_ I _don't even know where I am, how can he know._ I am so confused.

Maybe he's said that to comfort me.

 _BlushingRose:_ **What do you mean?**

 _FiftyShades: **I know where you are.**_ **_I'm coming to get you._**

My heart is in my throat and it feels like all my blood has left my body, replaced with adrenaline, when I read what he just sent to me.

It was all fun and games until I read that.

 _How does he know where I am?!_

I'm seriously freaking out as I frantically look around to see if I'm being watched, but I'm alone.

I quickly turn my phone off and take out the SIM card as I try not to panic. I start to walk as fast as I can in my heels, hoping I can find someplace where I can use their phone to call a cab because I don't want to turn mine back on. I'm unsure if he's tracking my phone or not, but I don't want to risk it.

I've only been chatting with this man a few days, I don't know him. Maybe if he had known my location because I told him, it would have been different, however, I don't think I would ever be ready to meet with someone I met online, in a BDSM chat-room no less, but for him to know where I am without me telling him is beyond terrifying and is what Lifetime movies are made from.

I quickly turn around, hearing a car pull up behind me, and back away with nowhere to hide.

I'm ready to run, thinking it's some internet BDSM serial killer who has stalked me like his own personal plaything, but instead of running away I run to him when he jumps out of the car and hug him tight so thankful that he's here.

"I-I w-was so s-scared." I admit as I hold him, trying to sound calm but it comes out shuttered.

"I'm sorry, I'm so sorry, beautiful." Chad says as he holds me close, breathing me in and kissing my head. "I was jealous. I didn't mean to drive away and leave you like that. I just got so angry, I needed to cool down. I'm such an ass, I know."

"Can-" _sniff_ "Can you take me home, please?" I stutter out and sniff as I wipe my tears.

I need to get out of here before some internet killer arrives.

"Of course."

He helps me into the car then drives once he's in his seat.

We're both quiet as he drives.

My heart is still pumping so fast. I'm so thankful that Chad returned before Fifty came. I don't know this man, this _FiftyShades,_ I don't even know his real name, I could've been killed! _What was I thinking?!_ I hold myself while Chad drives me home, unable to stop replaying Fifty's last message in my head. ' _I know where you are_. _I'm coming to get you'_ That's the most terrifying thing I have ever read in my life.

 _What would I have done if Chad hadn't returned? I would probably be laying dead, raped, tortured and killed, somewhere._

Chad pulls up to my apartment and opens the passenger door for me, quietly walking me to the main door and waiting with me while I get out my keys to unlock the door.

After I get the main door unlocked, I look at him, grateful that he came back even though I should be pissed that he even left in the first place.

"Do you want me to come up?" He asks gently as he puts some hair behind my ear.

I shake my head so he drops his hand.

"I really am sorry, beautiful."

"I know."

"And I really want you back."

"I know."

He raises his brow for me to continue, but I just look down and shake my head.

"I can't, Chad. I don't want that. I don't want to be punished for being me." I look up at him through my lashes.

"Friends?" I offer.

He gives me a small kind smile. "I'll settle for that, I guess."

He kisses my cheek and waits until I'm safely inside before he drives away.

Once I'm inside my apartment with the door securely locked and double checked that it's locked, I text José to let him know I wont be able to make it to his show, then I get into the shower to wash my fears away, but my shower doesn't last long because every little noise I hear, scares me so I get out and change into my pajamas.

I make a quick sandwich for dinner then eat it in bed because I feel safer in my room with the extra door locked.

Tonight is the first night in four days that I do not chat with _FiftyShades_ before going to sleep, although tonight is the first night I have ever cried myself to sleep. I don't even know why I'm crying. I'm crying over the loss of something I never had, something that never was. I've only know him for four days via online, and I'm crying over losing him? _How ridiculous!_

* * *

The next day, my cold is so bad, I am forced to call in sick and not go to work.

 _"Seattle Independent Publishing, Claire Stevens speaking. How may I help you?"_

"Claire, it's Ana." I blow my nose as I lay in my bed, used tissues surrounding me. "I'm so sorry but I need to take off today."

 _"Oh, Ana,"_ Her voice full of sympathy. _"you sound awful."_

"I feel awful." I admit.

 _"You sure picked a good day to stay home. The people from GEH are here, including the CEO himself. He is ridiculously hot in person! A little young for my tastes, but as hot as this man is, he doesn't look very happy."_

I giggle, remembering Claire told me she's attracted to older men, but Mr. Grey was pretty old if you asked me, old enough to be her or my father. I wonder how much older she likes her men?

"What is the CEO doing at SIP?" I ask, thinking he's there to tell SIP employees that he's selling.

 _"He's making all kinds of demands and rules for the SIP employees. It looks like SIP is here to stay but they're changing all kinds of things, including the name to Grey Publishing and our location. Don't worry, I'll send you everything via email."_

Just the other day I overheard Mr. Grey and his employee talking about selling off SIP, piece by piece. _I wonder why they aren't selling anymore?_

"I'm glad I'm staying home then. He sounds like a domineering tyrant." _Which is weird because,_ "I saw him the other day, he seemed nice."

 _"Nice is not a word I would ever use to describe this man. I'm quivering in my booties when he walks passed the front desk. It seems like he's waiting for someone else to arrive because he keeps coming out here and looking out the main doors. I swear he's going to go bald if he runs his fingers through his hair one more time. I'll let you know what's going on with SIP, but it looks like they are cleaning house. Hyde was already fired."_

"Jack was fired? Why?"

 _"Nobody knows. There was a rumor going around that he was reading everyone's emails, but surely that's not a reason to fire anyone,_ _a warning I would assume would work in that situation, it's_ _just a massive invasion of our privacy."_

That would explain why Jack asked if I had a date yesterday regardless of the fact that I looked ill and my other coworkers said how awful I looked, obviously not 'date worthy'. Chad message me on my work email, Jack must have read that we were going to my friend's show. Claire's right, that's such an invasion of my privacy. No wonder he's fired, but then I remember... I was Hyde's assistant, if he's gone...

"Do I still have a job?"

 _"Yeah, girl, don't you worry about that. The CEO himself already said you do. You'll be working for Martha now. I'm just glad he's not selling the company like we all thought he would. When you come in on Monday, we'll be in a new location, the GEH headquarters building, Grey House. They're moving everything over this weekend."_

"Wow, that's fast, but why would the CEO himself say I still have my job?"

 _"I have to go."_ She whispers not answering my question. _"The Wicked Witch of the West is nothing compared to this man and he's coming my way, probably to look for whomever he's expecting again. Get well soon."_

"Good luck. Bye."

When I saw Mr. Grey at the café the other day, he didn't look very intimidating.

I shrug my shoulders, at least I still have my job and I wont be working for a creep any longer.

I spend the rest of the weekend in bed, fighting the cold I have and hoping it will be gone by Monday so I wont have to miss anymore work since it seems Mr. Grey is dropping us like flies. Thankfully, I wont have to work under creepy Hyde when I return.

* * *

I'm feeling much better by Sunday.

Claire said SIP was moving locations to _Grey House,_ and I would need to go to the new building Monday. Since tomorrow is Monday, I need to check my email that way I know where to go and what to do when I arrive tomorrow.

I read Claire's email, as well as a 'welcome to GEH' email sent by HR. They both basically say the same thing on what to do and where to go when I arrive at _Grey House_. The very first thing I notice on both emails is they both remind me to always address the CEO as Mr. Grey or Sir and never use his given name under any circumstances. They both tell him to check in with the front lobby reception then they will tell me which floor HR is on, HR will handle it from there and then I will be sent to the new Grey Publishing floor.

After I read through both emails concerning work, I see a bunch of emails with messages from _FiftyShades._ I'm curious so I click to read them.

 _FiftyShades: **I'm here, where are you?**_

"Oh my god." I breathe, covering my mouth with my hand when I read that he really found where I was Thursday night.

 _FiftyShades: **Rose, where are you, baby?**_

 _FiftyShades: **I'm worried,**_ ** _Anastasia_** ** _. Please, tell me you're alright._**

I feel my eyes widen as I gasp, whatever blood that was in my body instantly drains and I swear my heart has stopped beating when I read that he knows my real name.

I read a few more and the time stamp from the last one of him saying he's leaving was sent around 6 in the morning.

There are a bunch more sent Friday and Saturday, and even some this morning, begging for me to reply and tell him I'm alright. I almost feel bad that he stayed out there all night Thursday looking for me, but then I remember he could've hurt me. Even so, I don't want him to worry so I send him a message to apologize.

 _BlushingRose:_ **I'm sorry I worried you, it was not my intention. I'm fine, however, I think it's best if we stop talking.**

 _FiftyShades: **Rose, I'm so sorry if I scared you. I didn't know what else to do when you told me you were stranded with no way of knowing where you were. I was thrilled when I found out we are both located in Seattle. I would never do anything to harm you, I was honestly only trying to help**_ **.**

 _Did he slip when he revealed that he knows my real name Thursday night? Is that why he's calling me Rose now, to not scare me? Well, it's a little too late not to be terrified now!_

 _BlushingRose:_ **I appreciate your concern, but you scared me more than me being stranded alone did. I don't know you. I'd rather not chat with you anymore.**

 _FiftyShades: **Rose, please. Please forgive me.**_

 _BlushingRose:_ **I forgive you. Goodbye, Fifty.**

I log out and delete my account so he can't reply.

* * *

Monday morning I drive Kate's car to _Grey House_ , the building SIP has been moved to. I arrive early since we need to get security clearance, passes to access the building without stopping at the front desk everyday, and IDs as well as fill out all kinds of new paperwork.

"Thank-" I go to say thank you to the man who is holding the door open for me, but when I look up, I see the employee that was having lunch with Mr. Grey last week. The sexy Greek God, suspected dominant.

"Hi." I squeak and smile at him.

"Hello." His deep masculine voice sounds like honey, pure delicious honey.

"Thanks again." I tell him.

He frowns. _How is it possibly to look beautiful when you frown?!_

"For bringing me my book the other day." I explain as we walk into the building together. "And for holding the door open for me just now."

"You're very welcome."

"Have you worked here long?" I only ask because we walk towards the front desk together.

He's an employee, why would he need to check in with the front desk? Surely he has an ID badge by now to grant him access.

He stops walking and looks surprised by my question so I stop walking as well and explain.

"It's just, I'm new. It's my first day and I don't know where to go." I lie, hopefully smoothly. The emails told me what to do and where to go.

"I'm with SIP." I tell him after awhile because he's just staring at me with a strange impassive face, but his eyes are alight.

I know it's lame because the email said to check in at the front desk, but I wanted to be in his presence a bit longer.

"I see."

 _Did he just check me out?!_

"Follow me, I'll show you where to go." I think it's just me, but that sounded... sensual.

We walk together through the lobby, passed the reception desk without checking in like the email said to do. The blonde receptionist just stares fascinated, probably at the Adonis that is walking next to me, but as we walk together, I notice a few more inappropriate stares of disbelief.

 _Gees, do I look that bad next to a Greek God?_

I self-consciously, and as subtlety as it is possible, straighten my clothes and do a quick run through of my hair, tucking in any flyaways behind my ear, as we walk, trying desperately to make my appearance any better than it is, but it's impossible to look good when you have a God like man next to you.

He leads me to a bunch of elevators, and when he reaches his hand out to call an elevator, I can't help but stare at his strong hands wishing they were roaming my body as he- _OH MY GOD, ANA!_

I close my eyes to stop my wayward thoughts from going erotic, but it's too late. I blame Chad for introducing me to sex, great sex, because now more than ever I want it and can't have it.

"Miss." He calls my attention.

I blink open my eyes, seeing the elevator is open and the man is waiting for me to board the car as he holds the doors.

"Sorry." I mutter, and cue the infamous blush.

When we get on, he pushes the button for the second floor and as soon as the doors close it feels like I'm suffocating and the walls are closing in, making the already confined space even smaller. I'm not claustrophobic or anything so I don't understand why I would feel this way, unless...

I look up at the man through my lashes to find him glancing down at me before he looks straight ahead, seemly unfazed and unaffected.

Perhaps, it's just me then.

Thankfully, the one floor ride up was not long and soon the doors open, revealing a huge desk in the lobby with three blonde receptionists sitting behind it. They are all smarty dressed and have a very professional vibe to them. I instantly feel as if I wont fit in here at GEH.

"This is human resources." He tells me, holding the elevator doors open. "They will help you then show you to the publishing floor."

"Thanks."

He nods and steps back inside the elevator so the doors will close.

I take a step forward, but quickly turn around when I realize I forgot to ask his name, but he's already gone.

I watch the numbers at the top of the elevator climb higher and higher, trying to see which floor he works on. Perhaps I can make an impromptu visit to his floor, but someone interrupts my concentration and I don't see which number the elevator stops at.

"Excuse me, miss, may I help you?"

I look at the blonde business woman and tell her my name and that I'm here from SIP.

After getting everything set with HR and security, I'm shown the publishing floor.

It's no longer SIP but GP, Grey Publishing. I don't know what made Mr. Grey change his mind about keeping SIP so I don't care about the name change, I'm just thankful I still have my job and I don't work under creepy Hyde any longer.

 _ **~..~..~**_

Martha is great and much better to work for than Mr. Hyde. It's lunch time now so instead of exploring the area, I'm going with Chad to find a used car since he emailed me earlier, asking if I needed his assistance with that. I don't mind going with him since I did tell him we could be friends, and I need a male with me so the car salesmen don't see a naïve girl that knows next to nothing about cars and I end up over paying for a lemon.

I'm waiting outside in front _Grey House_ for Chad to pick me up.

"Are you running already?"

I turn around hearing a sexy masculine voice and blush when I see it's him, the employee I saw with Mr. Grey.

"No, sir. It's my lunch break." I explain, smiling politely.

I bite my lip when I see his eyes flicker over my body quickly. _He is checking me out!_ This is the second time I've caught his wandering eyes.

I quickly release my lip to accommodate my now heavy breathing when his eyes land on my mouth. He licks his lips- oh, that tongue- then looks into my eyes. The intensity in his eyes, dark and grey, causes me to look away just as it did the first time I saw him.

"I'm Anastasia by the way." I introduce myself as I put some hair behind my ear that the wind has blown free.

I look up when he doesn't say anything.

"That's a beautiful name, Anastasia."

 _Oh god, the way he says my name goes straight to my core and dampens my panties._

"Thank you. I got it for my birthday." I say the joke as seriously as I can manage.

Ray told me I should say that whenever I received that response to my name because I was getting annoyed with how many people would constantly tell me how beautiful my name is. Not that I minded, but after the billionth, 'beautiful name' I became annoyed with the response. I guess it could be worse... My name could be Gertrude or something like that, and I'd have to go by Trudy. Which is also why I prefer Ana over Anastasia. It's more common. But, as I've been told many times over, Anastasia is a beautiful name, and I want him to see me as that, beautiful.

My little joke causes him to laugh loudly, making him look younger and if possible even more handsome.

I wait until he's calmed, but he doesn't say anything more, only smiling at me now with his eyes shinning bright. This smile is so huge, megawatt, that it's likely to cause panties to either dampen or come off completely. I seriously debating doing the latter because I'm already soaked, but we're in public.

"Aren't you going to tell me your name?" I ask to get my mind off of anything sexual. _Oh gawd, what if his name is something incredibly sexy._

"My name?"

I giggle but stop when he cocks his head to the side.

"Christian." He says simply after long pause, and if that isn't the sexiest name I've ever heard. Of course, I don't mention that.

"It's nice to meet you, Christian." _Oh god I love saying that name. I could only imagine screaming it when I- ANA!_

I hold out my hand for his and just before we are able touch, I feel someone put their arm around my shoulder and twist my body a little but enough to move me out of Christian's reach.

When I look up, I see it's Chad in his Dominant stance and he is glaring daggers at Christian with his arm still possessively over my shoulder.

I roll my eyes at him and shake my head as I get out of his hold.

When I look back at Christian, he's glaring right back at Chad unintimidated and just as Dominant, and if I'm not mistaken his look is a bit more malicious.

 _Do they know each other?_

I frown confused by the two and their pissing contest since I don't 'belong' to anyone.

"You ready to go, beautiful?" Chad wraps his hand around my waist this time, pulling me toward him.

"Yeah," I say as I again get out of his hold and distance myself away from him. "Just give me a minute."

I look back at Christian who doesn't look very pleased.

"I have to go, but it was very nice meeting you... _Sir_." I purr when I call Christian sir, just to piss Chad off because he is seriously pissing me off right now with his 'she's mine' bullshit, when I'm anything but his.

"The pleasure's all mine." Christian smirks at me.

I bite my lip to prevent my smile from taking over, and when I turn to walk to Chad's car, I see Chad glaring at me now. Maybe that wasn't my best idea, but seriously, he didn't have to come over and 'stake a claim on me' just because I was talking to another man. Gees, now Christian probably thinks I'm taken.

"Seems I'm not the only one." Chad says cryptically as hands me a to-go box and begins to drive.

I can smell the delicious aroma from the food. I start eating now on the way to the car lot so I don't miss lunch with my car shopping.

"What are you talking about?" I ask as I take a bit of the chicken wrap he brought me from his restaurant.

"Nothing."

I shrug as he dismisses whatever it is he's talking about, and continue to eat my lunch while he drives us to the car dealership.

 ** _~..~..~_**

Car shopping with Chad went surprisingly well. He was nice and friendly enough, and he took the liberty of having a few safe, reliable, and affordable cars ready and waiting for us when we arrived so it didn't take as long as I thought it would. I even found a car I liked, which happened to be the first one we looked at. I wasn't expecting to purchase today, but I liked the car and need one, so with Chad's assurance that it was safe and reliable, I bought it.

After we finished with the paperwork and the car buying process, he followed me back to my apartment so I could drop off my new-used car, and then he took me back to _Grey House_ all within my lunch hour.

The rest of my first day at GEH/GP went well and it's now time to go home so I'm walking to Kate's car in the underground parking garage of _Grey House_ , a perk for working here instead of having to park in the open lot at SIP's old location.

I unlock Kate's car and I'm about to open the driver's door when I hear someone behind me.

"So is he your boyfriend?"


	6. (6) Blushing Like A Rose

**APOV**

"So is he your boyfriend?"

I quickly turn around, gasping at the sudden question in the otherwise silent parking garage, and see Christian. He's leaning against a shiny black car with his arms crossed, looking sexy as fuck, waiting for an answer. His sleeves are rolled up to his elbows, showing off his strong forearms, and I can't help but imagine what the rest of his body looks like out of his suit. He obviously works out and takes care of his body.

He raises his brow when I don't reply instantly, and his eyes begin to darken, making him look, if possible, even more desirable. I wonder what he's thinking. _He obviously thinks you have a man, Ana._

"No." I answer, knowing who he's asking about. "He's just a friend."

Now he doesn't look pleased. I notice Christian's jaw tighten, his body is more ridged, and his eyes... they show his displeasure. You would think he would be happy to hear Chad's not my boyfriend.

"A friend?" The way he says it is like he's never heard the word before, like I shouldn't be friends with Chad for some reason, but how can he be upset with this when he doesn't know me and he doesn't know Chad. He obviously doesn't approve of my friendship with Chad. Maybe because he's a guy and they seem to be very territorial?

"Yes." I confirm that Chad's my friend.

"I see."

We're both starring at each other, neither saying a word, until he pushes himself off the car he was leaning on.

I instinctively back up but Kate's car is directly behind me so I end up hitting my back against it. He is now standing tall right in front of me. I have to look up since he's so much taller than me, most people are, and he has to look down as he towers over me.

I try, _really try_ , not to squirm and bite my lip when I see him lick his lips, however, my breathing does pick up. I really shouldn't look at his mouth, it's unsettling, but I can't resist.

"Are you free?" I watch the way his mouth moves as he says each word, but when I finally realize what he's asking, I'm confused.

"Free?" _What the hell is that supposed to mean?!_

He's quiet for awhile, just staring at me, until he finally clarifies what he means.

"He's not your... _boyfriend_. Do you have a _boyfriend_?"

"Oh." The way he says the word boyfriend sounds... _dirty._ Like he's talking about something else entirely. "No, I don't."

I see him fight a smirk and win as he stays impassive. I can't help but blush when his eyes dance all over my face with what looks like wonder in them as he stays expressionless. He may be trying to hide what he feels, but his eyes... his eyes give him away.

"Do... " _Should I ask?_ "Do you have a... a girlfriend?"

"No." Now I see humor in his eyes.

It's like he wants to say more but wont, for some reason.

After awhile of just starring at each other, I clear my throat when he doesn't say anything more.

"Well, goodnight, Christian." I finally open my car door because I don't know what to say to this insanely attractive man.

"Anastasia." The way he says my name, it rolls of his tongue, sweet and seductively, dampening my panties.

As I drive home, I think of the really weird scene in the parking garage.

He asked me if Chad was my boyfriend, then asked if I had a boyfriend and that was it. He didn't say anything else after I confirmed that I was 'free'. What a weird thing to ask, am I free. It was like he was asking something else entirely, and then he doesn't continue. _What's up with that?_ I know I suspect he's a Dominant, but I don't know for sure, I can't prove it. Maybe most men are just naturally dominant alpha males.

* * *

It's been another uneventful second day at GP, my second week in the business world. I love my job, assisting an editor and editing manuscripts, it's everything I imagined it would be. There are no creepers at GP, just mysterious Greek Gods who corner young girls in parking garages asking them questions about being free.

I enjoy working for GEH, I'm so glad Mr. Grey decided not to listen to his employee, which happens to be the Greek God I've had the pleasure of running into.

It's my lunch break and luckily that café I had lunch at when I worked at the old SIP location is closer to the new building so I have lunch there.

I'm just starting to eat when my cell rings. I was reluctant to turn it back on incase _FiftyShades_ tracked me again, but I need my phone on to communicate with my friends and family, and I haven't heard anything more from him.

I wipe my mouth and quickly swallow when I see that it's Kate calling me.

"Hi, Katie!" I grin when I answer.

 _"Ana! I miss you. I've been trying to call you."_

"I miss you too. You're coming home Friday, right?" I don't tell her I had my phone off so the psycho stalker that tried to kill me can't stalk me. I was very apprehensive about connecting my phone again, but so far I haven't had anything creepy happen from turning it on.

 _"No,_ _Sunday."_ Kate corrects me. _"Dad wants to stay as long as possible so we're staying the weekend too. You'll pick me up from the airport, right? Our flight home is super early so I can ride back with my parents if you'd rather sleep in."_

"No, that's fine, I can pick you up."

 _"So how is everything going? Your new job, that guy, Chad, everything."_

"Well, GEH bought SIP so I'm now working for Grey Publishing, and Chad and I broke up."

 _"Oh, sweetie, I'm sorry. I know he was your first. Are you okay? You can borrow my pink pjs if you need to."_

I giggle, thinking about those god-awful pajamas. Kate wears these ridiculously ugly yet incredibly comfortable pink pajamas with bunnies all over them when she's going through a breakup.

 _"Ice cream helps too."_

"No, I'm fine." I tell her, "It's not like I was in love or anything, it just didn't work out between us, but we've decided to stay friends."

"Mind if I join you?" I look up hearing a sexy masculine voice and drop my jaw when I see Christian standing at my table.

 _"Who was that?!"_ Kate squeals through the phone, no doubt hearing Christian.

"Kate, I'll call you back later." I hang up on her without taking my gaze away from Christian.

He's so handsome, incredibly so, and the way his suits fit him... I bite my lip as my eyes roam his body, but stop when he clears his throat.

"Sorry," I mutter, clearing my throat, trying and failing not to blush. "I don't mind."

He gives me a beautiful full teeth showing smile as he sits across from me. There's only one way to describe that smile, panty soaking.

We're both quiet, not speaking, just staring at each other. He's beyond attractive and his eyes are this beautiful shade of grey. He raises his brow like he's expecting something, but I frown confused. He just smirks and shakes his head as his eyes dance with mischief.

When the waitress brings him his food, he begins to eat.

"So... What do you do at GEH?" I ask to make conversation.

"I'm in mergers and acquisitions." The way he says it is like he's hiding something, but I don't know what or why.

We're both quiet again. He seems to be deep in thought about something.

"Have you worked there long?" I ask another question to fill the void.

"Since the beginning." He answers cryptically with a smirk, a sexy smirk at that, then stays quiet still deep in thought as we eat.

I'm not sure why he's asked to sit with me. He's not making conversation, he hasn't said anything other than to answer my questions. He asks to join me, yet I'm the only one starting the conversations. Maybe he just needed a place to sit, but as I glance around the small café, it's not very busy and there are plenty of open tables. I'm even more confused than before.

I don't know what else to talk about so we're quiet for the rest of our meal.

"I should be getting back," I say when I've finished my meal since it's time for me to go back to work. "My break is almost over." I explain as I stand.

"I'll walk with you."

 _Okay?_

We walk back together in silence. I'm not sure what to think of this man. He's attractive, very attractive, and very taciturn. It's like he wants to say something more than he has but wont and I'm not sure why.

"Anastasia." He calls my attention before we enter _Grey House_.

I look over my shoulder and realize he's stopped walking so I stop as well.

We're just standing in the middle of the sidewalk in front of _Grey House_. He runs his hand through his hair making it look so sexy and just fucked. Since he called my attention and hasn't said anything yet, I just wait for him to continue, however, if he doesn't speak soon, I'll need to leave since I have work. He had half my lunch hour to talk to me, and didn't.

"I've never done this before." He finally says.

"What?"

"Found my own." He explains cryptically, if you can even call that an explanation.

"What does that mean?" I shake my head, not understanding. _Found his own what?_

"I'd like to talk to you about something."

"Okay." I wait for him to continue.

"In private. Will you come to my place tonight, for a drink, perhaps?"

"I don't know if I'm comfortable going to your place alone. We just met yesterday."

"I have... staff." He says reluctantly, like he didn't want to say it. "We wont be alone."

"Is that supposed to reassure me? That I'll be okay because you have people there. People whom you pay to do what you want them to do."

"Fair point well made."

I snap my head towards him. I've heard that before. _Where?_ I wrack my brain trying to think of who said that to me.

"It's just I want to talk to you, privately." He says before I can figure out who said those words to me. "I've never had to do this before and my place would be ideal. We could go to yours, I suppose."

"NO." I quickly reply. I don't want some man I don't know to know where I live and that I'm alone until Sunday. "Yours is fine."

"Great." He smiles that panty soaking smile, and if I'm to be working in the same building as this man, I'm going to need to bring extras.

"I have to get back to work before I'm late," _And before I do or say something stupid_.

We begin to walk towards the front doors of _Grey House_ together.

"I can meet you at your place or follow you there." I tell him as we walk. "I get off at 5."

"I'll pick you up-"

"No." I stop, and interrupt him as he holds the door open for us. "I'd rather drive myself."

I swear it takes him to the count of ten to respond.

"As you wish." I can tell he's trying hard not to sound upset, but his jaw is clenched so I know he is. "I live in a building called Escala. 1920 4th Ave. Just let the front desk know you're there to see me. I'll have someone bring you up."

"Okay."

We walk into _Grey House_ together with the usual stares of disbelief. I even borrowed an outfit from Kate's closet today and I still don't match him in the looks department.

Christian calls the elevator for us and together we board the car. He pushes the button for the publishing floor for me and expect him to push the button for his floor too but he doesn't.

Just as the last time, the confine space of the elevator seems to be even tighter and hotter for some unexplainable reason. The ride to the publishing floor takes a little longer than yesterday's 1 floor up to HR.

My breathing has picked up as well as my heart rate. I bite my lip as I watch the numbers climb to the publishing floor but quickly release it when I hear a deep growl coming from the man standing next to me. When I look at him to ask if he's okay, he looks like, _OH FUCK,_ he looks like he wants to attack me.

The elevator doors open on the publishing floor, effectively breaking whatever was happening.

Christian blinks and once again looks his usually impassive self.

"I get off at 5." My voice is husky as I remind him. "So I'll see you shortly after that."

"I look forward to it, Anastasia." His tone is slightly seductive.

He grins like he's won the lottery as the doors close.

 _What have I got myself into?_

 ** _~..~..~_**

I'm sitting in my car after work in the parking garage of _Grey House_ , deciding if I should go to Christian's place or not. I know I told him I would, but after I thought about it, I don't really know him and I don't know how comfortable I am going to his place alone. I blame my father for my cautious behavior.

I don't have his number so I can't really call him or send him a text saying I changed my mind, and it is rude to blow people off.

I know I'm going to go because I'm curious as to what he wants to talk to me about that he couldn't at lunch today. _Damn my curiosity_. Since I'm going, I want someone to know where I am, and there is only one person I can tell since he's the only one I know that is actually in Seattle.

 **Hey, I just wanted to let you know, I'm going to be at Escala tonight. -A**

 _Oh god, why did I phrase it like that?!_

I wish there was a cancel button on this stupid phone, but it's too late, it was already sent and read.

 _ **Why? -CG**_

 **I'm visiting a friend from work. -A**

 _ **Who? -CG**_

 **I told you, a friend. -A**

 _ **A guy? -CG**_

 **What does it matter? -A**

 _ **What's his name? -CG**_

 **None of your business. I just wanted to let someone know where I was going to be. Goodbye. -A**

I toss my phone in my bag and begin to drive to Escala, ignoring my phone's constant vibrating and buzzing.

It doesn't take me long to drive to the 30 story building known as Escala but when I park, I see his car.

I roll my eyes as I get out and march over to him.

 _How did he get here so fast?!_

"What are you doing here?" I hiss at him as soon as he climbs out of his car.

"What are _you_ doing here?" He repeats my question much more calm and controlled than I.

"I told you, I'm here to see a friend. Now answer my question, Chad."

"You don't know anyone in Seattle." He accuses me.

"You don't know that. I met someone at work and we're meeting here."

"What are you planning to do with this friend?"

"I don't have to explain myself to you, Chad."

"Then why did you tell me where you were going?"

"It obviously was a mistake. I just wanted to let someone know where I would be and you're the only one I know in Seattle."

"Anastasia-" His tone is warning but he's cut off and interrupted by another man, exiting Escala.

"Excuse me, is there a problem here?"

"No." I answer the man without looking at him.

I start to walk towards the building, but Chad grabs my arm, stopping me.

"I'm not finished talking to you, Anastasia."

"Well, I am. I'm finished talking with you about this, Chad." I try to pull my arm free, but he wont loosen his grip. "Let me go."

"No, Anastasia, you don't-"

"The lady asked you to release her, sir." I hear the man from before say.

I look back at the man who is still waiting near the door. He's dressed in a fitted black suit with a buzz cut. He reminds me of Ray, military. He looks like security, perhaps for the building.

"Listen, buddy, this is none of your business so why don't you run along."

The man steps up to Chad, unafraid and ready to intervene if Chad doesn't release me. Chad lets me go only to step up to the man, just as unintimidated, so I step between them before they kill themselves.

"Chad, just go." I put my hands flat on his chest to stop him from doing anything stupid.

He glares at me then the man.

I roll my eyes at him and his testosterone rush when he continues to stand toe-to-toe with the man, just like he did with Christian yesterday, although today these two are more in a 'I'm going to physically do something' rather than yesterdays standoffish approach.

I turn around to enter the building without saying anything more.

"Anastasia." Luckily, he doesn't grab me again.

I ignore him as I walk inside.

"Hi, I'm Anastasia Steele." I say to the front desk receptionist. "I'm meeting a friend who lives here. Christian." _Damn, I don't have his last name._

"Christian Gr-" The receptionist starts, somehow knowing who I'm asking for, but is interrupted by the man that was outside with Chad and I.

"Right this way, ma'am."

I follow him to the elevators and together we board the car. He inputs a code and soon the elevator begins to move up. I notice it's nothing like being in an elevator with Christian, and I wonder, is it just the GEH elevator, or is it Christian?

"You know Christian?" I ask to make conversation.

"Yes, ma'am. I'm his... driver."

Oh, he must be the staff Christian said would be here.

"I'm Anastasia, by the way. Anastasia Steele."

"Taylor."

"It's nice to meet you, Taylor." I hold out my hand for him.

"You as well, ma'am." He has a gentle yet firm handshake, and it reminds me of my daddy.

"Military?" I suspect.

"Yes, ma'am." He tells me, "Marine."

"My dad was in the Army." I let him know.

The elevator arrives at our destination and opens to a beautiful foyer with pale pink roses arranged in a beautiful crystal vase on a dark wood round table.

Taylor opens the double doors revealing a huge breathtaking room with floor to ceiling windows displaying Seattle, then he leads me to a door and knocks before he opens it.

"Ms. Steele to see you, sir."

Taylor nods for me to enter so I do.

Christian is sitting behind a desk. I can only see that he's wearing a T-shirt and when stands, I see he is wearing faded distress jeans that hang off his hips and he's barefoot.

 _Holy fuck!_

I hear Taylor shut the door behind me when he leaves us alone.

"Hi." I squeak and blush as I check him out.

 _If I thought this man looked good in a suit..._ _Can those jeans look any sexier? Yes, yes they can... on the floor._

"You made it." His smile, _oh that panty dampening smile. It's no longer panty dampening, it's panty soaking, drenched, flooded._

"Mm-hm." I can't speak, I can't think.

"Would you like to sit?"

"Sure."

I sit in front of his desk as he returns to sit behind it. I wait for him to speak, but he just looks at me, not talking.

"You said you wanted to talk to me privately." I encourage him to speak.

 _Is this going to be like our time at the café?_

"Yes." He looks through some papers on his desk and hands me one. "Before I speak with you, I need you to sign this."

"What is it?" I ask as I accept the paper.

"It's a non-disclosure agreement. It basically says you can't discuss anything personal about me to anyone."

"Okay. If you want me to sign one then I'd like you to sign one."

 _Why would I need to sign an NDA? Furthermore, why in the world would I need him to sign one for me?_

He smirks and huffs through his nose like he's laughing but with no sound.

"Of course."

He signs a paper so I sign the NDA, then we switch and sign again. I fold my copies in half then put it in my bag and wait for him to talk about whatever it is that he wanted to discuss in private that required an NDA, but instead of talking he stands.

"Come with me."

I stand and follow him out of his office.

He leads me up the stairs to the second floor until we come to a door.

I suspect it's locked since he doesn't open it, instead putting his hand into his pocket and producing a key, confirming the door is locked.

He puts the key into the lock, unlocks the door and opens it for me to enter first, but I don't move. I wrap my arms around myself and wait for him to go first.

"Are you going to go in?" He asks amused.

"You first." I challenge him.

"Very well."

I follow him inside the room.

The first thing I notice is the smell; leather, wood polish with a faint citrus scent.

When he turns on the lights, it's gives the room a soft glow.

I make a small unbelieving nose when the room is revealed to me as I glance back at him.

 _I knew he was a Dominant, I knew it!_

He's impassive. _Does he ever show emotion?_ I look around the room, thinking every man is into this kinky shit. Chad doesn't have a specific room but he did take me to a club once. I didn't like that it was 'public' and I preferred to do 'this' in private so we've never done anything in a room like this, only his bedroom.

I start walking around the room to examine everything.

I play with a flogger, run my fingers along a cane, sitting on the bed that dominates the room as I let my fingers dance across the leather and looking at the chest of drawers wondering what kind of kinky toys it holds.

I stand to admire the woodwork of the bedposts.

When I look up I see carabiners all over the ceiling at odd intervals, and an expansive iron grid suspended from the ceiling, and from it hang all manner of restraining devices. The item that seems to stand out is the room, is the couch that is facing the bed.

"Say something." Christian commands, his voice deceptively soft.

I was so enthralled with the room, I almost forgot where I was.

"Is this your room?" Is the only thing I can think of.

"No." He gives a little chuckle. "It's my Playroom."

"Why are you showing this to me?" I ask, finally looking at him. I suspect I know the answer, but I want to be sure. I mean, I know I suspected him to be a Dominant, but do I really come across as someone in this lifestyle?

"Because I'd very much like to do this... with you."

 _He wants me?!_

I feel my cheeks warm and I know I'm blushing as I bite my lip so I don't grin like a school girl at the thought of this man wanting me.

"You're blushing." He observes more to himself than me. "Like a rose."

"What?" I ask quietly. _Like a rose?_ That's a very sweet... _Oh god... No._

My heart beat picks up going a mile a minute. _Please. Please, no._

"You blush the color of a rose. It's beautiful."

I just stand here, starring at him with _BlushingRose_ running through my head, but surely it's a coincidence, right? _Right?!_

Then I think back to the foyer and the blush pink roses and remember _FiftyShades_ said his foyer had blush pink roses, then I remember him saying 'fair point well made' this afternoon, and I now remember _FiftyShades_ sent that to me.

 _OH MY GOD!_ He's FiftyShades! _He'_ _s the psycho BDSM internet stalker!_

Thank fuck I told Chad where I was and he knows I'm here. I have to get out of here. Now!

I quickly rush passed him and dash out of the room, running down the stairs as fast as I can in my heels.

"Anastasia." I hear Christian call my name, so I look over my shoulder to see him jogging after me.

 _Shit!_ He's much faster than I am.

Because I'm not paying attention, I trip on the last stair and fall on my hands and knees.

I quickly look up at him coming down the stairs.

 _Double shit!_

I get up, leaving my heels on the floor as I rush to the elevator, repeatedly hitting the call button over and over.

My heart could not possibly beat any faster and feels like it's going to fly out of my chest.

The elevator finally arrives when Christian enters the foyer.

I quickly get in and push the door close button and push every button on the keypad to get the damn thing moving, but it seems to be locked or stuck or something. It's not moving but the doors being to close.

A hand comes in-between the doors, stopping them from closing completely, and opens them again.

When he stands in between the doors, holding them open, he looks turned on.

 _OH MY GOD!_

I back away from him, pushing myself in the corner of the small space, panting like crazy, afraid of what he might do to me.


	7. (7) Unexpected

**CPOV**

At her request, I go inside my Playroom first, she follows behind me.

She makes a quiet little noise when she sees my Playroom after I've turned the lighting on.

I stay impassive when she glances at me over her shoulder then starts to walk freely around the room, exploring. Her tiny hands on my flogger are making me hard and it pisses me off as much as it pleases me. _I'm not fucking 14 for fuck's sakes, why do I get a boner near this woman from just looking at her?!_

She still hasn't said anything as she continues to fondle the items in my Playroom that I long to use on her.

"Say something." I demand gently as she still hasn't said a word.

"Is this your room?" _My room?_

"No." I can't control the laughter that escapes my lips as I explain, "It's my Playroom."

"Why are you showing this to me?" She asks, finally facing at me, looking hopeful. I think. I hope.

"Because I'd very much like to do this... with you." I tell her straight out as my dick starts to twitch with excitement at the thought of fucking her, but I will him to stand down. _For now_.

Her eyes darken with want as she swallows hard. She looks so much more desirable as her cheeks warm that delicious shade of pink. It amazes me that she's blushing, I'm not sure why, but I so badly want to see that color all over her tiny body, but then she does it. She bites her fucking lip. If I thought my dick was hard before, now he's raging, seeking her as she does this, like I haven't had control of my body for years.

"You're blushing." I observe. "Like a rose."

"What?" She's quiet, I barely hear her.

"You blush the color of a rose." _BlushingRose_ fits her. "It's beautiful."

I realize my fuck up too late when she pales and quickly runs out of the room.

"Anastasia." I call after her but she ignores me.

I jog after her so I can explain, but she doesn't stop, instead she looks over her shoulder to see me coming. Fuck, she looks frightened.

As she's looking at me, she misses the last step and falls down. She looks so fragile and terrified.

"Fuck." I breathe and rush to help her up but she scrambles to her feet before I can reach her, leaving her heels, and running to the foyer.

I'm right on her trail when she enters the elevator so I'm able to stop the doors from closing, not that she could go anywhere without the code.

When I open the doors she's cowering in the corner panting heavily from her running, or from her fear, perhaps both, and the sick sadistic bastard that I am, can't help but to be turned on. I would never hurt her or want her to run from me, but the thought of stalking her like my prey, of her fighting against me. _Fuck, I am a sadistic bastard_. However, I would only want this as a scene, safe and controlled.

I feel badly for frightening her like this. It was not my intention.

"Don't. Fucking. Touch. Me." She hisses between her teeth when I step near her.

I was not expecting those words from this sweet girl, that's for sure.

She tries to move further away from me, but can't, so I hold my hands up in surrender to show her I wont touch her and I mean no harm.

"I can explain." I say in the most gentlest tone I have ever used in my life thus far.

"Explain what?" She snaps. "That you're a sick psycho pervert killer that is stalking me?!"

"Anasta-"

"Let me go." She desperately pleads, interrupting me.

"I can't."

"Ohmygod." She breathes like it's one word and starts to look around the confined space of the elevator. Looking for what, I'm not sure.

"Not until you let me explain. After I've explained myself and you want to leave, you can. I promise."

"Fine." She says not moving. "Explain."

I hold my hand out to help her out of the elevator but she just looks at it and then at me in discuss. The rejection I feel hurts. I've not felt that emotion before and it's unsettling, so I just bring that hand to my hair and run my fingers through it.

"I wont hurt you, Anastasia, I promise." I stress. "I'd like to talk inside the apartment instead of in the elevator."

She doesn't move.

"Please." I say the foreign word with meaning. "I am not a serial killer, and I'm not a stalker," _I don't object to being a pervert because I want to do very perverted things to her._ "When we talked online, that was the first time I was ever on a BDSM forum, and I enjoyed chatting with you. I admit, I did what I had to do in order to find out where you were Thursday night, but that's it." I lie smoothly.

I've stalked her more than Thursday night, enough to be served with a restraining order. Thank fuck she doesn't know I've been driving by her place all that weekend, hoping to see some form of life inside. I even went to SIP Monday morning waiting for her to arrive so I could see for myself that she was safe, not to mention tracking the computer's IP Address the night we first started talkin.

"I'd like to discuss this inside my apartment, Anastasia. I will explain everything and answer any questions you may have. Will you please come out of the elevator?" I'm talking to her like she's an injured animal. It reminds me of the story my mother read to me when I was younger. _Little Red Riding Hood_. The big bad wolf pretending to be someone innocent. That's how I feel right now, like a wolf in sheep's clothing.

I move aside, giving her enough space to exit without feeling threatened, but keeping my hand on the elevator doors to hold them open.

She seems to consider my request, and comes to a conclusion.

Reluctantly, she wraps her arms around her tiny body and exits the elevator.

I hold the foyer door open for her and together we walk to the main sitting area of the main room.

"Where's your _staff_?" She asks looking around, presumably for Taylor whom she's met.

"They're here." I assure her.

Taylor's presumable watching this unfold in the security room on the CCTVs. I could only imagine what he must be thinking while watching our interaction. I'm sure he was ready to intervene when he saw me chasing Anastasia down the stairs from my Playroom and her looking terrified. Thank fuck he knows me and knows I would never hurt a woman without her permission.

"Hmph. You tell me you have staff here so I feel comfortable being here alone with you, yet they don't come out when I need them?"

"They know I would never hurt you. If I did, they would intervene. Believe me."

She rolls her eyes at me unbelieving. It makes my palm twitch, but I stow it, for now. I will my dick to stand down as well, but the thought of spanking her is seriously arousing enough for me to feel the dampness of my pre-cum. I'm pissed at both my body and her.

"Have I harmed you yet?" I growl now. My gentle tone long gone. "No. I haven't even touched you."

"Just say what you want to say so I can leave."

"Sit." My CEO/Dominant persona slipping through, aggravated that she still wants to leave.

She raises her brow at me, not moving, with her arms still wrapped around her tiny body.

"Please." I say in a much more gentler tone, this time it's more forced than before, and she does.

To keep her comfortable, I choose to sit on the opposite couch from her so I can explain myself while we face each other.

"How did you find out who I was?" She starts before I can say anything.

I contemplate how much to reveal without frightening her further.

"When you told me you knew about GEH's takeover of SIP, though you didn't actually say SIP, I knew you were talking about the publishing house since you told me you worked in publishing and SIP was the only publishing house GEH was taking over. That's when I found out who you were." It's the truth.

"How?" She shakes her head not understanding. "Even if I told you I worked at SIP, I didn't tell you my name."

"You told me your boss's name. Hyde." I explain. "Jack Hyde was the only Hyde working at SIP and his assistant's name, Anastasia _Rose_ Steele. It wasn't that difficult to figure out that you were _BlushingRose_." Along with other variables I will keep to myself.

"Why didn't you tell me when you found out?"

"Well... As lame as it sounds, and with what just happened now, I didn't want to freak you out. I was thinking of a way to tell you, but then Thursday night happened."

"I'm so stupid." She mutters under her breath, looking away from me as she rests her forehead on her hand.

"No." I tell her. "You're not."

She looks at me so I explain, "You're a very smart young lady not telling a strange man online too much information about yourself and not wanting to meet him. There are far too many real life horror stories of meeting people you met online in person. You had no way of knowing who I was or what my intentions were."

"Obviously I said too much if you found out who I am."

"I was just very observant. More so than most." I say to try to comfort her. "I put two and two together and obviously got four."

I don't mention I had Barney track her computer's IP address, that anyone with half a brain could of tracked her.

"I'm never going to chat with anyone online again." She vows to herself. "You may not be the next Ted Bundy, but the next person I chat with very well may be. How did you find me? You knew where I was Thursday."

"When I found out your _ex_ left you stranded, I did the only thing I could think of. I tracked your phone." I continue to explain myself and my actions of that night. "I had to get to you before anything terrible happened. I wasn't thinking clearly and didn't realize me knowing where you were would actually freak you out. I knew who you were, but you didn't know who I was. I know now I should have explained better, but at the time, I was worried about you and panicked." Again, not emotions I'm familiar with.

"How did you track my phone? You didn't have my number."

 _Shit! Think, Grey._

"Since GEH bought SIP, I was able to retrieve your cell phone number from the SIP employee files, and I was still in the office when we were chatting that night." I come up with quickly and believably, continuing to alter the truth in order to not frighten her again.

"But how did you track my phone? With some sort of James Bond gadgetry?"

"The technology to track cell phones is available over the internet. How _did_ you get home that night?" I change the line of questioning. It's been bothering me since Thursday, and I have been worried about her since then, until she messaged me Monday morning.

"Chad came back." _Her ex_. "He apologized and took me home."

I try to stay unaffected as I clench my jaw and fists, hearing about her _ex_ again, but I really want to know what else they did after he took her home.

"You forgave him for leaving you stranded in the middle of nowhere, just like that?" I try not to growl at her, but my tone is firm.

"You terrified me more than being alone in the middle of nowhere did. Knowing where I was, who I am." She accuses me. "I just wanted to get out of there before you showed up. I didn't know who you were, I didn't know what you would do to me. I _know_ Chad. I'd rather of left with him than wait around for someone I met online only days earlier. For all I know, you could have said all those things to get me to let my guard down, and I did, only to turn around and kill me. I realize I forgave Chad way too easy, but at the time it was my only option."

"I apologize." I try to sound cool and calm but inside I'm still seething about the _ex._ "I was terrified something would happen to you and I just reacted."

"I was fine." Defiant little girl.

"You were terrified." I remind her. " _Before_ I revealed I knew your location."

She looks down in defeat, knowing I'm right.

"Is he still your ex?" I need to know. Last I knew they were going to reconcile, at my persistence, stupid fuck that I am.

"Yes, I told you yesterday." She looks beautiful as she looks up at me through her lashes. "We're just friends now."

That man wants more than to be her friend. He wants back into her panties.

We stare at each other for awhile and I slowly smile when I see her relaxing.

"Am I forgiven?" I pout.

She sharply inhales and bites her lip. I blink away the arousal I feel and shake my head, but stay quiet.

"I guess." She whispers, looking away then back at me through her lashes again. "I'm sorry I freaked out."

"You did overreact." I raise my brow at her and glance back at her heels that are still on the floor near the stairs.

"I know that _now_." She snaps gently. "But look at it from my point of view. I'm alone in a new city, I talk to a nice man online for a few days and he somehow knows where I am, who I am, without me telling him. How was I to know you weren't being nice to lure me so you can torture and kill me. I met you on a _BDSM_ chat site for goodness sake. Then I met you in person for the _first time_ yesterday and you invite me to your place today. I didn't feel comfortable coming here, but against my better judgment, I did because I was curious. You may know you wont hurt me, but how was I to know when I _just_ met you and I don't know anything about you."

"I apologize for freaking you out." It amazes me that she still has no clue who I am, even _after_ meeting me in person.

"And I apologize for overreacting." She repeats. "Do you know that saying; When you hear hoofbeats, think horses, not zebras? In other words, don't expect to see a zebra when you turn around. Chances are it's a horse."

"Woodward's aphorism." I confirm that I know what she's talking about.

"Yea. Well, I think zebras, every time. I blame it on my love of literature."

"Now that I've explained myself..." I say after another pause of silence. "Do you want to leave?" I hold my breath, waiting for her answer.

"No."

There's only one reason she'd want to stay. I try not to smirk in victory at her blush.

"You look too... _normal_ to be involved with this dark kinky lifestyle." I observe.

She did say her ex convinced her into trying the BDSM lifestyle and that left her curious, but it's so hard to believe this girl is intrigued with the lifestyle at all. She looks so... innocent, too innocent. I can tell she's not had much experience, not including what her background check told me, and that she's not very Submissive. It's going to be that much more exhilarating to train her to my liking.

"Normal people have no idea how beautiful the darkness truly is." She quotes to me. "I assure you, I am anything but normal."

I hope that's true, her believing darkness is beautiful.

"I've asked you here because I wanted to talk to you about a relationship." I get right to it. "It's no secret, Anastasia, I want to fuck you. I've already told you upstairs, but you haven't answered me." _Because you frightened her, Grey_. "Would you be willing to be my Submissive?"

 _Has blush ever looked so sexy?_

"You read my emails." She hides her gaze from mine, playing with her fingers, as she speaks shyly. You would think she's being Submissive, however, I see she's trying to hide her blush, and I can tell she's aroused as she squirms, continuing. "I don't like pain or punishments or even controlling my life outside of the bedroom. You'd be willing to give that up?"

That's not a no. _Yet, Grey_.

"Not necessarily. We'd go over everything that you're okay with and find your hard limits regarding pain together." I don't mention the controlling bit. I need control.

"But I don't want that. I don't want to be abused before I have sex."

"Okay, first of all BDSM is not abuse." _It seriously pisses me off when people mislabel it_. "BDSM is a form of _consensual_ power exchange where _both_ participants are empowered. Abuse takes away another person's power completely. With BDSM, Submissives have the power to stop their Dominant, using a safeword. You say that safeword, and everything stops immediately. When you're abused you can beg and plead for them to stop, but they don't. In BDSM everything is negotiated and agreed upon before anything happens. With abuse, you don't know when or how it will happen and nobody every negotiates or agrees to it happening. BDSM creates trust and excitement when you see your partner, and those who are abused see fear and are afraid of their partners with no trust whatsoever. You still talk to your ex-Dom." I point out to prove my point. "If he abused you, you wouldn't consider him your friend."

"I guess you're right."

"I know I'm right."

"I'm not very Submissive." She warns me. Like that would detour me.

"I'm still very interested in training you." _Fuck, my voice is husky, filled with want. Control yourself, Grey!_

"So what does that mean for... us?" She whispers. "If I agreed to explore this with you."

 _She's considering?! It's still not a yes, Grey!_

"What do you mean?" _Us?_

"Would you be my boyfriend?"

"No." I shut that shit down right fucking now. "I don't do the girlfriend thing, Anastasia, I don't date. This is the only sort of relationship I am interested in." I don't know of her relationship with Garrett, but I don't want her getting the wrong idea about us. "It would be a strictly Dom/Sub relationship only. I'm not a hearts and flowers kind of man, Anastasia, I don't do romance. But if you agree to be mine, to be my Submissive, I will be devoted to you and I will take care of your needs."

"That's not a problem, regarding the status of our relationship. I'm not looking for my forever just yet, I'm just wanting to be young, have fun, and gain some of the experience that I didn't earlier in life, so the BDSM Dom/Sub only relationship is fine, but I mean... I really don't want to be hit like that again. I don't want punishments."

"Why did he punish you?" I realize she's never told me why he punished her.

"I asked him to."

"You asked him to?" I repeat, confused. That's not usually how it works. Usually the Sub will do something so her Dom will punish her, she doesn't speak, she doesn't 'ask' him to.

"I told you, I'm not in the lifestyle but he convinced me to try it. At first we were exploring the sex because..." She looks down at her hands as she continues. "Well, because I was a virgin. It was getting pretty embarrassing being a 21 year old virgin so I just..." She shrugs her shoulders. "You know, did it. Then we got into the more kinky stuff and.." She blushes and shrugs her shoulders again, this time almost apologetically."... I enjoyed it, even though I only had sex a handful of times, I really enjoyed it. I guess I really missed out on not having any kind of relationship or sex all throughout high school and college."

 _WHAT?!_

I feel my eyes bug out of my head like a fucking cartoon character at her revelation.

 _Virgin?!_

 _That fucker took her virginity in a BDSM scene?! Even I'm not that fucked up of a sadist to do that. I would have made my best attempt at vanilla for her. Even though I lost mine in a scene, she deserves better than that, she's not fucked up like I am._

"You lost your virginity in a scene?" I'm just barely hanging onto my control.

"No. It was... um, vanilla?"

 _Well, thank fuck for that, however, that didn't explain why she asked him to punish her._

"I don't understand, then why did you ask him to punish you?"

She shrugs. "I enjoyed getting into the role of a Submissive and I wanted to see if I could do the full hardcore BDSM." She shakes her head. "And I can't. When he hit me, I didn't like it. After it was over, I told him he would never hit me like that again and he said he needed it so I left."

"But you were intrigued enough to research BDSM and found the webpage after it happened."

"Yes." She whispers shyly.

"I want to explore a BDSM relationship with you, Anastasia." I say again since she still hasn't agreed just yet. "That is if you want to. I mean, I don't want to push my luck, I understand I've frighten you."

She blinks a few times and I think she's stopped breathing. She pauses, considering it, and now it's my turn to stop breathing.

"Okay." She whispers, agreeing.

"What?" I admit I'm shocked.

"As you know, I kind of wanted to try it again anyway. So... okay. "

"Yeah?" I'm unsure why my cheeks are hurting, but I couldn't be happier.

I admit I am quite surprised she agreed to be mine after I scared the living daylights out of her just moments earlier. She thought I was a serial killer five fucking minutes ago for fuck's sake, now she has a doe-eyed look and has just agreed to be my Submissive. Mine.

"Yes." She giggles a beautiful laugh. "Is it weird that just minutes earlier I was running from you scared, afraid you'd kill me? Now we're entering into a sexual relationship."

Her breathing catches in her throat when I chuckle with her as she repeats my thoughts out loud.

"Shall we go over the contract?" I say in hopes to move us along and into the Playroom for a scene tonight.

"Contract?"

"The contract," I repeat. "To decide what you will do and what you wont do, as well as what I will and wont do. What we can expect from each other. I would never want you to do anything you're not comfortable with so we need to discuss, in detail, what you are and are not willing to do sexually and otherwise."

 _I'm sure she's done this with Garrett._

"Oh, I didn't do a contract like that with Chad."

 _Or not._

"How did you know what your limits were?"

"Well, I didn't know mine but he had his written down. We were exploring my limits as we went."

I really don't like talking or thinking about her with another man, it only confuses me more. I've had plenty of Subs who had plenty of partners and here I am getting jealous over her single partner, her single partner whom she still talks to regularly.

"I have the contract in my office." I say in my Dom/CEO voice as I stand. "We can discuss everything in there."

"Okay." She whispers.

As we walk to my office, I can't help but smirk at how this evening turned out. It went from _0 to_ _50_ in a matter of seconds. I can't believe just minutes ago she was running for the hills, now we're going to discuss our contract and you better fucking believe I'm going to fuck her... tonight. Never did I imagine our night would turn out like this when she ran out of my Playroom. It's definitely a lesson learned in communication.

Once in my office, I sit behind my desk and she sits in front.

I was getting the contract ready when she arrived so I don't have the top page with our full names or the last page for us to sign yet, but I hand her the contract anyway. After we discuss our limits and she leaves, I will draw up a new contract for her to sign. She'll know my full name then, but it's not like I can keep who I am from her forever.

"The first page is my heath check-up, showing my clean bill of heath." I explain. "I'd like to receive your health records from you as well."

"Okay."

"Are you on birth-control?"

"Yes, but I'd like you to use condoms."

"I don't like condoms, I want to feel you. And there's no need since you're on birth-control. I will, however, use them until I receive your health records."

"Um." She seems hesitant, biting that lip as she contemplates.

"What?" I urge her to tell me what's on her mind.

"I've not had sex bare before."

"It's very pleasurable. You'll see." I'm determined.

"Alright." She breathes, clearly affected and wanting me as much as I want her.

My dick decides now is the time to wake, again without permission, at the thought of fucking her already. We have to move this along as soon as possible and we've only discussed the first fucking page. She's already agreed to my first demand, this may go faster and easier than I thought.

"The next page is my hard limits. Anything you'd like to add?"

"No fisting of any kind, no choking, no genital clamps, no suspension, no gagging, no photos,-"

 _That's a lot of fucking hard limits, and she's not even finished listing them yet. Did she just say... no photos?_

"No photos?" I interrupt her.

I use photographs as insurance policies, but I'm curious as to why it's her hard limit.

"Yes, um. Chad had photos of his previous Subs in very vulnerable positions for his viewing pleasure. I'm not saying you do, but I refuse to let that be me."

I nod.

I'll have to think of another insurance policy for little Miss Anastasia Steele.

"Continue."

"No caning, belting, whipping, p-"

"Wait."

She stops and looks at me when I stop her from naming every-fucking-thing on the fucking contract as her hard limit.

"Are you going to add every punishment to your hard limits?"

"Maybe." That 'maybe' sounds more like a definite 'yes'.

"Anastasia, I don't know what happened with you and your ex, but I would like to test your limits. I assure you it's mainly about pleasure. I'll show you."

"Okay, but if I don't like it you'll stop."

"I'll stop as soon as you safeword. I'll even stop if you say no or stop since you're so inexperienced. I know you're new to the lifestyle so I will go slowly and increase intensity as we continue and I will listen to your body as well as your words to stop."

"Okay." She nods, putting some hair behind her ear.

"Shall we continue?"

She nods and looks at the contract.

"What's this?"

"My rules." I answer when I see what page she's on.

"Rules?" She says like it's absurd.

"They may be subject to change. Everything is negotiable." I assure her, wondering which of my rules she finds offensive.

"I don't need any rules." _Apparently it's all of them._

"You do. It's a part of being my Submissive. You follow the rules to my liking and I shall reward you. You break them and I will discipline you. They may be subject to change." I repeat. "Let's discuss them."

"No." She shakes her head.

"No?" I say like it's a word I don't know the meaning of, and to be honest, it's not a word I hear often.

"I don't want _any_ rules. I don't like to be told what to do unless I am naked." My dick is raging at the thought of her naked. "And I don't want to be controlled other than in the bedroom, during sex." She looks at my rules and starts listing them off like they are the most outrageous thing she's ever heard. "Sleep, food, clothing, exercise, beauty; those are all just ridiculous rules guaranteeing a punishment. You can't control how much another person sleeps and eats, and what's with the clothing and beauty aspect?"

I've never had someone nitpick at my rules before. During the contract negotiations, my potential Submissive is quick to jump.

"I like to take care of what's mine. If you're to be mine, I want to know you're well taken care of. Health is a part of taking care of you. As for the beauty and clothing; Again I want to take care of what's mine, lavish money on you if you will. "

"So you make up crazy rules about how much sleep I'm allowed, food I'm to eat, exercise I receive?"

"It's to ensure you are healthy and fit. You need to have enough stamina for what I have planned. I can go for hours, baby." I smirk.

She gasps and blushes.

"I-" Her voice is so full of want and I so badly want to say 'fuck the paperwork' and fuck her on my desk. If she keeps her mouth gaping open like that, I'm going to fill it. She clears her throat and tries again. "I wont agree to any of those rules."

"What about the obedience, food, exercise, and the personal safety rules?" I negotiate. "I'll let you chose your beauty and clothing."

"No. I wont be told what I can and can't eat. I will agree to the obedience rule and the power exchange only in your bedroom or um, your Playroom, if we're doing a Dom/Sub scene. As for the personal safety rule, I don't smoke or do drugs but my roommate and I do go out for drinks every once in awhile. I don't party like crazy and I've never really been drunk. However, I wont be punished for having fun."

"So you're agreeing to obedience and personal safety to a degree."

She nods.

Power exchange only in the Playroom, I've not done that before. _Can I do it now?_ If I want her I'll have to.

"And you don't want clothing or beauty?" I check.

She shakes her head.

"It says I'm to accept gifts without complaint or hesitant..." She reads. "What gifts? Flowers, chocolates, promises you don't intend to keep?"

"Cars, clothing, jewelry, etc. Whatever I feel like giving you."

"Very expensive gifts." She murmurs to herself, looking around my office like it's the first time she's seen it. "GEH must pay you well."

 _She really doesn't know who I am, does she?_ It's fucking awesome. She's looking at me like I'm any ordinary Joe Schmo. It's not everyday that I meet someone who doesn't have a fucking clue as to who I am. I'm not famous by any means, however, I am well known, especially _in_ Seattle.

"You can say that."

"Well about the gifts, we're only entering into a sexual relationship so I don't think you should give me things. I may be wrong, but that's too 'romantic relationship', not 'Dom/Sub relationship'. Don't you think?"

"I purchase my Submissives items to ensure their safety and so they are well taken care of." I feel like I'm repeating myself.

"But-"

"As I've said, Anastasia, I want to lavish you with money. Let me buy you some things."

"You don't need to spend your money on me, Christian." She rushes out like I'm going to interrupt her. "I'm really not that kind of girl."

"I'm not exactly hurting for cash, Anastasia, anything I purchase for you will not make a dent in my accounts," _I assure you_.

"But you don't have to."

"But I want to." I counter.

"I only have to use what you buy in your company?" She gives in, seeing I wont back down.

"Sure."

"Alright."

I look down and cross off all the rules except the few we've agreed upon. _Fuck, I gave up a lot._ I see we forgot to include the last rule that reads; _the Submissive will not enter into any sexual relations with anyone other than the Dominant_ , and remember her ex.

"I'm monogamous in my relationships, Anastasia." It's a warning. "You will be mine, I do not share."

 _What's mine is mine_. _Non-negotiable_.

"Okay." She breathes. She's so fucking turned on at how possessive I am.

"I don't want you to enter into another sexual relationship while you're with me." I stress in my Dom voice.

"I wont." She shakes her head.

I give her a stern look before I continue, looking at the contract so we can go over her soft limits.

"Sexual acts." I read. "Is there any sexual acts you wont do? You said no fisting, anything else you object to?"

"Anal sex doesn't exactly float my boat."

"Have you had anal intercourse before?"

"No." She blushes. "But I don't think I would like it."

"Anastasia, you can't say you wont like it if you haven't tried it. Anal sex can be very pleasurable. I'd like to claim your ass so I'd like to keep that on the list."

"If we try it and I don't like it, we don't have to do it again?"

"No." I assure her. "If you don't like something we do, we wont do it again."

"Okay."

"Swallowing semen, okay?" I ask when I read the next item.

"I guess that would be fine."

"You guess?"

"I've, um, not done _that_ yet."

"Excuse me?" I cock my head to the side.

"I haven't... um..." She trails off and bites her lip.

This girl is such a contradiction. One minute she's brave and speaks her mind, the next she's shy and wont say anything.

"You haven't done oral?" I guess. _Or does she spit?_

She shakes her head and looks back at the contract.

 _She really is innocent, isn't she? Then why is she interested in BDSM?_ I guess the quiet ones really are the ones you need to look out for.

I look at the next section about toys, vibrators and butt plugs, then look up expectantly, raising my brow, waiting for her approval.

"Those are fine."

We look a the next section; bondage.

"No tape, harsh ropes or metal handcuffs."

"Okay." I agree and cross them all out as well as suspension.

"You said you don't want to be gagged." I remember. "I will agree to that, but I'd like to blindfold you at times."

"That's fine."

Now is the last part that I know she's dreading most; methods of punishment.

"As I've said, punishments are part of the lifestyle. We may only have a few rules, but you may require punishments, and I would enjoy punishing you. We need to go over methods of punishments you're comfortable with right now, and as we explore your limits, we can increase intensity or try different methods."

She nods so I continue, listing the different methods. I cross off what she already listed as her hard limits before I begin.

"Spanking, okay?" I ask her.

"Yes."

"Whipping?"

"No."

"Biting?"

"Um, not hard or anything to leave a bad mark."

I nod and make note.

"Hot wax?"

"Does it burn?"

"No. It's hot but wont burn you."

"Okay."

"Paddling?"

"No."

"I'd like to keep paddling on the list. If you don't like it we'll take it off completely, but I'd like to keep some sort of implement left on the list. It's caning that hurts the most and you've already labeled that a hard limit."

"Alright." She agrees hesitantly.

 _Don't worry, baby, I'll show you how pleasurable a punishment can be._

 _Fuck, Grey! Stop with the calling her baby!_

"Nipple clamps?"

"Nipple clamps for pleasure are fine."

I make a note.

"How much pain are you willing to experience?"

"None." She says immediately.

I want to laugh but her serious tone tells me she's not joking.

"That doesn't tell me anything, Anastasia. Where 1 is likes intensely and 5 is dislikes intensely, what is your number?"

"5." She says just as serious.

"You dislike pain that much?"

"Yes. Who likes pain?" She says like it's the most ridiculous thing, to enjoy pain.

"Masochists." I answer.

"Well, I'm not a masochist so 5."

"Alright, I'll make a note. Now we need to discuss term. I like for the contract to go for three months and then renegotiate after the term has ended. Is three months a problem?"

"Yes."

I set my pen down and lean back in my seat.

 _Of fucking course it is._

This is the most negotiating I have ever done with a potential Submissive.

"What's the issue?"

"I don't want it written down when we'll end our arrangement or renegotiate. We can renegotiate as we go or end it whenever we like, we don't need it written down. I'm not looking, however, if I meet someone while in contract with you, I want to be able to end things with you without waiting for our 'term' to end."

"Fine!" I snap when I think about her ending things with me in the future, leaving me for some asshole she hasn't met yet.

"Availability." I list the next thing we need to agree on.

She looks at that section.

"Every weekend?"

"Is _that_ a problem?" I ask, but I know there is from her tone.

"Yes."

"And what's the problem?"

"I work during the week, and I have a life, I have friends. I don't want to submit every weekend to you and avoid my friends."

"Your friends." I growl thinking of that fucker Garrett.

"Yes, my roommate will be home soon, and we like to hang out on the weekends." Effectively avoiding the elephant in the friends conversation. "How about every other weekend?"

"Three weekends a month." I counter.

"Why does it have to only be on weekends?"

"I'm a very busy man, Anastasia. I only have free rein on the weekends."

"Okay, how about every other weekend and if I'm available the other two weekends of the month, I'll play with you."

Just her saying she will play with me is enough for me to agree.

"Deal." I try not to smile. "You're quite the negotiator."

"I just now what I want." She shrugs.

I nod.

"So do I." I murmur aloud. _You._

I'm foregoing many things I never would or have before just to get her to be mine.

"I may be new to sex but I know what I like." She continues. "I like to be dominated by a man."

"I'll be more than happy to dominate you." _Now._ I shift discreetly in my chair to adjust this raging hard-on, trying to get more comfortable.

"You- you want me to stay with you the whole weekend?" She squirms in her seat, changing the subject.

 _Fuck, we're both a squirming mess of need and want_.

"Yes." I stifle my chuckle but can't help the smile forming on my face. "I have a guest room upstairs for you to sleep in."

"I wont sleep with you?" She sounds confused.

"No." I shut that shit down right here and now.

"What have you done?" It's my turn to change the subject.

"What do you mean?"

"Sexually." I explain, though I'm not sure I want to know. "I asked you before, but it's usually discussed when you enter a new relationship."

"Oh, um. Vanilla, nipple clamps, my nipples are very sensitive," G _ood to know. Don't smirk, Grey_. "toys, like vibrators, and some bondage. I've only had sex a handful of times before I ended things with him so I haven't gotten too much into the more kinky stuff, but the kinky stuff we did do I enjoyed it enough to explore the lifestyle further. What have you done?" She returns my question.

"Everything." I say cryptically. I know she wont know what _everything_ means but I've done it all and don't want to waste the night talking about all the fucked up shit I've done, I want to fuck her and it's a weekday. We have work tomorrow and it's getting late.

I look down at the contract but see we're finished so I close my contract and she closes hers, putting it into her bag that she left in my office.

"That wasn't so bad, was it?"

"I guess not. Chad didn't have everything this organized."

I clench my jaw at her talking about her ex again. _Why do I feel so fucking jealous?!_ I don't fucking understand it.

"The fundamental purpose of my contract is to allow you to explore your limits safely."

"Oh, I almost forgot." She announces. "No kissing."

"That wont be a problem," I don't kiss my Subs, it's too intimate. "but may I ask why?"

"Just in scenes, vanilla it's fine. Chad said BDSM isn't about emotions so I don't want to get too intimate when I play so I can stay in character. I've gotten quite well at portraying a Submissive and when I kiss, I lose all thought, so I wont be able to stay in character."

 _Like I said, too intimate_.

"I'd like to scene with you, Anastasia."

"Now?" She squeaks seemingly surprised.

"Yes, now."

 _Talking about her limits and not having a release for months, I'm hurting here._

"Well, um, but it's getting late." She points out.

"I don't care." I stand and walk around my desk, leaning against it as I stand in front of her. "I want to fuck you, Anastasia, and I know you want me too. You wouldn't be discussing this contract just moments after being scared to death if you didn't."

"I barely know you." She tries to come up with a lame ass excuse. "Maybe we should get to know one another a bit more first."

"I know we don't know each other well, but this isn't a get to know one another type of relationship." I explain. "Besides, you're mine now."

"Okay, but... I don't really want our first sexual experience to be in a BDSM scene, Christian. I mean, can it be vanilla? At least our first time together? I'd be more comfortable doing that."

"Vanilla?" _I've never had vanilla sex before, can I do it now?_

"Yes." She whispers.

"Can we spice it up?"

"How so?"

"Bondage." I can't let her touch me.

She bites her lip, thinking about it and then she looks up, having decided.

"While in a BDSM scene I would agree to spice up vanilla, but for our first time..." She shakes head negatively.

I exhale.

"Alright. Follow me."

"We're really going to have... sex." She whispers sex like it's a dirty word.

"Yes." Determination in my voice.

"Now?" She squeaks.

"Yes," I've waited long enough.

"O-okay." She stutters quietly, getting to her feet.

I open my office door for her and she walks out, turning left instead of right. I presume she's going to the Playroom, but if I'm going to have vanilla sex for the first time, I don't want to get distracted with the items I have in there.

"Anastasia." I call to her.

"What?" She looks back at me.

"This way." I turn right, leading her to my bedroom. I guess I could take her to the Submissive bedroom so she could see her room, but we're already down here and I want her now. I don't want to wait another second to be balls deep inside of her.

I open my bedroom door and walk to my chest of drawers. I've never had sex in my own bed, in my room, but I keep my extra condoms in my top drawer for when I would fuck a Submissive on the main floor, not wanting to go upstairs for a condom from my main stash if a condom was required.

I turn around and find her looking out the floor to ceiling windows. She's admiring the view, so I take a moment to admire her backside. I can't wait to sink my dick into her. I've wanted to fuck her since I saw her in the café.

"Anastasia."

She turns around when I call to her. The view of her body mixed with the evening light is breathtaking.

"Are you ready?" I try to sound impassive, but my husky tone betrays me.

"Yes." She's quiet.

"I don't make love." I warn her, unsure where to start as I run my fingers through my hair. "I fuck. Hard."

"That's fine."

I just stand here not knowing what to do, which is new for me.

"Should we um, get naked now?" She asks.

It's cute how shy she is. One minute she's a seductress, the next she this sweet innocent girl. _Cute, Grey?! You don't do cute._

"Right." I run my fingers nervously through my hair again.

She giggles, "Are you a virgin?"

"What? No."

"Are you sure you're a Dominant?" She looks at me suspiciously.

"Yes." I growl.

"Touchy. Well, are we going to do this or what, because it's getting late. I could undress you." She walks towards me with her hands outstretched, ready to take the lead, but I panic and step back.

"No." Thankfully she stops. "Get naked and lay on the bed." I demand.

"You could be a little nicer about it, gees."

"I'm sorry. I told you, I've never done this before outside of a BDSM scene. I don't really know what the fuck I'm doing here, I'm not into the hearts and flowers bullshit. When I walk into my Playroom my Submissive is already ready to do with as I please. You want vanilla. I've not done that before."

"Ever? What about your high school girlfriend?"

"I didn't have a girlfriend in high school." I admit.

She looks shocked then eyes my body.

"Where you like... some dorky nerdy boy that came into some sexy burst over summer break or something?"

"No." I chuckle at the idea. I've always been blessed with this face, but it's just that, a pretty face.

"Look, it's really not that hard. I'll show you."

I instinctively tense when she looks at my chest for a fraction of a second like she wants to physically show me and undress me again, but when her eyes met mine she's decided on a different tactic and I calm a bit more.

"Undress me."

"What?" I'm taken aback by her demand, unused to being told what to do. It's been years.

"Undress me, Christian." She says very seductively and bites her lip.

 _Holy fuck! She's topping from the bottom, and it's sexy as fuck!_

I step up to her as she does me. We're both standing at the end of my bed. I realize at this moment I haven't physically touched her yet.

Slowly, I reach up and unbutton her blouse, revealing her white cotton bra.

"Sorry." She giggles as she continues to unbutton her shirt, taking over for me, and removes her shirt from her body. "I wasn't really expecting sex today."

"It's fine." _I just really want to see you naked, your lingerie choice is not a problem_.

"You can kiss me."

"What?"

"Kiss me."

"I thought you said no kissing?"

"In a BDSM scene." She reminds me. "This is vanilla."

I don't really kiss, but I will to pacify her. I lean down as she lifts her lips to mine intending to give her a chaste, gentle peck, but when our lips touch I feel an odd sensation run through my body and instead of an innocent kiss it turns carnal. This is our first skin to skin contact and it's phenomenal, out of this world, amazing.

I reach around and unzip her skirt, letting it fall to floor. I grab her hands when she moves them, unsure of what she was planning but I can't let her touch me, and bring them to the front of my jeans. She takes the hint and undoes them as I rid her of her plain white cotton bra and panties.

As soon as my pants hit the floor, I involuntarily groan into her mouth as she fists me, stroking me without my permission.

I walk her the few steps to my bed and gently push her down before she can take my shirt off. She looks sexy as fuck, laying naked on my bed, her brunette hair fanned out. I reach down and grab the condom that fell to the floor during our kiss, open it with my teeth and slide it on.

"You're very big." She's watching me as she leans up on her elbows

I smirk as I climb onto the bed, between her beautiful legs, parting them as I go, then I hold her wrists so she wont touch me.

"You're very beautiful." I state the obvious as did she.

I can't resist, I kiss her again, running my tongue along her lips. The tip of my dick is bumping into her sex like he's seeking his new favorite toy.

I hold both of her hands with one of mine then reach down and run my fingers along her slit, feeling how wet and ready she is for me. _So. Fucking. Wet._ This causes her to buck her hips up and my middle finger easily slips inside her tight hole. Since my finger is already inside of her, I add another and begin to move my fingers in a come-hither motion, hitting her sweet spot again and again while kissing her full lips.

 _Holy fucking shit! I have to have her... now! I'm going to fucking cum just from finger fucking her!_

I remove my fingers, and slam inside of her in one quick thrust without warning as I plunge my tongue into her mouth, capturing her moans and mirroring my actions. _Who knew kissing was so good?_ The endorphins from kissing is enough to get me to blow my load, but thankfully I have more control than a horny fucking teenage boy having sex with a goddess for the first time.

"Omm." She moans against my lips.

"You're so fucking tight, Anastasia." I tell her still balls deep inside of her, enjoying the feeling a little more than I should.

I almost don't want to pull out, but I do, I pull out and then thrust my hips forward while I swivel them.

I continue to pound into her picking up my speed. This may be vanilla sex, but we're definitely fucking.

This feels so fucking good, better than I imagined.

She tries to free her hands, but I don't let her go.

We're panting, sweating, thrusting together in synchronized unison. We fit perfectly together. I grunt feeling her insides clenching around me tighter than before. I grind into her, going deeper and deeper with each thrust, fucking her harder and harder.

"Oh god," She moans. "Don't stop."

If we were doing a scene, she'd be punished for that.

Her sex is squeezing me tighter and tighter, and I know she's close.

I pick up my speed and she cums all over my dick without warning or permission as she moans over and over, music to my ears. She's never looked so beautiful, with her head thrown back, eyes closed, mouth in that perfect O, her hands squeezing mine, and my dick deep inside of her.

 _Fuck!_

I want this to last longer but her pussy has a vice like grip on my dick, squeezing me, as her walls contract.

"Oh, baby." I moan out as I continue fucking her, however, I'm not going to last much longer.

 _Where the fuck is my control?!_

"Cum again. Cum for me, Anastasia." I want to feel her sex clenching me once more as I cum.

"Ah! Ah! Ah!" She pants as she cums again.

She lifts her legs and wraps them around me, trying to get me to go deeper.

"Oh, Christian!" She moans _my fucking name_ as I continue grind into her.

I take pride in the fact that I can control my orgasms, but never, _never,_ has anyone moaned _my name_ in _pleasure_ before. I am Mr. Grey, Sir, or Master, and the women I've been with were never given permission to say anything during sex. And that's it, that's all it takes, I've lost all my control as I explode inside her.

"Oh fuck!" I shout then whisper her name like she's the answer to my prayers. "Anastasia."

I continue to slowly trust into her as she rides out her second orgasm, then I slam into her one last time and still as I finish pouring my seed into the condom, inside her, coming harder and more than I ever have before.

 _What a fucking release!_

I told her I can go for hours and I last minutes, she's going to think I'm bullshitting. I came like a fucking teenage boy looking at a porno magazine for the first time. Before we have sex again, I'm going to jack the fuck off first so I _can_ last for hours.

When I finally come to, I realize my forehead is resting against hers, I'm still deep inside of her, and I'm holding her wrists on either side of her head. I'm still panting, trying to catch my breath, when I slowly blink open my eyes to find her grinning at me. It's the most beautiful smile I have ever seen in my life.

She's in _my_ bed, her hair fanned out, spreading all around her, and her eyes are glowing a bright blue as she smiles a gorgeous breathtaking smile so full of gratitude.

 _What the fuck have I got myself into?_

I kiss her lips sweetly and pull out of her. I'm already starting to harden, and if I wasn't wrapped in a condom, I would fuck her again.

I get off the bed and dispose of the condom, then I pull on my Playroom jeans and zip them, leaving the button undone as I turn around to face her.

She's no longer smiling as she leans on her elbow and is holding the sheets to hide her body, looking at me expectantly.

 _What's the aftercare for vanilla sex?_

* * *

 **A/N: _This chapter is quite long, but I couldn't find a place to split it._**

 ** _Thanks for reading and reviewing._**


	8. (8) Similarities

**APOV**

 _"Cum for me, Anastasia."_

I wake with a start, panting, covered in sweat and feeling the aftershocks of my orgasm. _Oh my gosh, I came in my sleep!_ Thank fuck Kate isn't home to hear me calling out my dream release. Fuck I'm loud. I sit up still trying to catch my breath and take a huge drink from the bottle of water on my nightstand table.

I can't believe I just had a wet dream. I was a virgin not too long ago and now I'm having sex, a lot of sex. Sex with Chad was great, but sex with Christian is toe-curling, mind-blowingly amazing, it was the most incredible sex I have ever had. I think I'm slowly turning into a freak or a sex crazed maniac.

I also can't believe I had sex with Christian last night after what happened; just minutes before we had sex, I was running for the hills terrified of him. I'm glad he explained things, but damn, I was scared to death not five minutes earlier and the next thing I know, I'm in his bed. Not to mention, I've only known Christian for two days, and I don't really know him, though I did begin to talk to him as _FiftyShades_ online just over a week ago so I guess I can include that in how well I know him, which still isn't well enough. He could have just told me he knew me and how, then maybe we could have got together sooner without all the creepy stalkerness, but I guess either way I would have been creeped out.

I get out of my warm bed and pad my way to the bathroom to shower. I take off my soaked panties and pajamas, then get into the shower. As I shower, I think about last night. I had sex again, and not just any sex, incredible sex. I feel like we rushed things, moved too fast so to speak, but I guess it was inevitable. We _are_ entering into basically a sex only type of relationship.

After having sex with Christian last night we had a late dinner together, cold cut sandwiches, and talked a bit more before I went home. Christian offered me his guest bedroom since it was so late by the time I was finally headed home, but I didn't feel fully comfortable staying the night with him just yet. I needed to go home, to wrap my head around this. Even if I did stay, I didn't have any work clothes there. Before I left we agreed to scene this weekend starting on Friday after work. That will give me a few days to get used to this crazy new arrangement.

As soon as I got home last night, I crashed as soon as my head hit my pillow, and I had the best night's sleep I've ever had in my life. The great sex plus the adrenaline crash was amazing for my sleep. I feel so refreshed this morning.

I can't believe my luck, or are all men secret Dominants? Either way, Christian and I are now in a non-emotional Dom/Sub monogamous relationship. I don't really know what that means or how it will work, but I'm glad it's monogamous even if it's just sex. I wouldn't have sex with another man while I'm with someone, non-emotional or not, it would still feeling like cheating, and I'm glad he wont have sex with other women while with me. A man like that, a sex god, surely has women lining up to be with him. And it's me that he wants. Talk about an ego boost.

That boost was shot back down after we had sex, though. I was a little hurt and surprised when he immediately got dressed like that's all I was there for was a quick fuck, but I guess, considering the relationship we're now in, I am. He didn't even take off his T-shirt while we had sex, which is unusual since I know that man is built like a Greek God. _Why wouldn't he want to show that off?_ He did say he's never had vanilla sex before, which is just really weird. That means he lost his virginity in a scene. He seemed upset when he thought I lost mine in a scene. He was obviously thinking of his first time, and if he was upset, that must mean he didn't have a very good introduction to sex. Then why continue with BDSM? This man in an enigma.

After my shower, I dress for work, grab a bagel to-go, lock my apartment, and I walk to my car.

I roll my eyes when I see him get out of his car and continue towards mine.

"Where were you?" I hear him ask from behind me just before I can get my car door unlocked.

I turn around with the bagel in my mouth, holding my keys and my bag in my hand, to see Chad still walking towards me.

"I waited for hours for you to come home last night so we could talk and you weren't here until well after 10 o'clock, looking well fucked."

I roll my eyes at him, and take the bagel out of my mouth so I can speak.

"Chad, we're not together, what I do is no longer your concern."

"I thought we were friends?"

"Yes, friends." I agree then proceed to tell him the meaning. "Friends do not get upset if another friend comes home late or if their friend visits another friend, friends don't stalk other friends, friends don't get upset with other friends for moving on, friends don't leave their friends on the side of the road, which I'm still upset about by the way. Friends, Chad. We're _just_ friends."

"Are you with him now? Your new _friend_? Is he giving you vanilla?"

"That is non of your business, who I'm with, or what I'm doing."

"I don't like it, Anastasia. You were mine."

"You don't have to like it, Chad, and the keyword there is I _'was'_ yours. I'm not any longer and that's your fault entirely. I tried to reconcile with you if you gave up the punishment aspect of your kinky lifestyle, but you said you couldn't do that. I'm going to be late for work if I don't go now so I'll talk to you later."

"What's his name, your new _friend_? You never told me. Is it Grey?"

"It doesn't matter, you don't need to know."

I did sign an NDA, but I wouldn't tell him anyway. _And who the heck is Grey?_

I get into my car before he can say anything more and drive to work.

 **~..~..~**

 **CPOV**

I've been awake for hours, unable to sleep after the night-terror of my former life that still haunts me. My dream started off with Anastasia and I in the starring role, but quickly morphed into my usual nightmare of my former life.

I've played my piano, done some work, and even emailed Elena letting her know I'm no longer looking for a sub.

After Anastasia and I had sex last night, we had dinner together and talked more about our relationship as well as previous relationships. I told her I had 15 Subs and fucked nearly 100 Subs in total, she told me she only had sex with one person, Chadwick fucking Garrett. She's very inexperienced compared to me. It's going to be so much wicked fun teaching her and training her to be mine. I've never had to train a Sub, but the prospect of training her to meet my needs is going to be exhilarating.

I'm not thrilled she's been with someone other than me, for some reason. I don't understand why, I barely know her and all my previous Subs had multiple partners before me. I didn't have a problem with that, but for some unknown reason it gets to me that someone else had her.

When I arrived at _Grey House_ this morning, Andrea went through my daily schedule and alerted me that Ms. Lincoln called since she couldn't reach me on my cell. Elena told her she wanted to meet with me about the salons. It's sooner than usual, but it is around the time Elena gives me the paperwork for the salons we co-own, so I granted her a meeting with me.

I have a busy schedule today so Elena's due here any moment. While I wait for her to arrive, I'm going through some paperwork for my next meeting which is immediately after I see Elena. I'm barely getting any work done with thoughts of Anastasia and I from last night, running through my mind.

 _~buzz~_

"Yes, Andrea." I answer my intercom.

 _"Ms. Lincoln is here to see you, sir."_

"Send her in."

 _"Yes, sir."_

I put away the paperwork I was working on so I can give Elena my full undivided attention just as the door opens and she walks in.

"What the fuck did you do to your hair?" I get up to greet her, kissing her cheek as she holds my biceps.

"I thought a change was due." She gives her head a little shake so her hair bounces. "Do you like it?"

"Brunette, Elena?" I shake my head as I sit at my desk. "It doesn't suit you."

"Well, thank you for being honest." She's snippy, but it's the truth.

I'm used to seeing her with her signature platinum blonde hair. Why would she dye it brown?

"You look much better blonde is all." I try to sound like I care but I don't.

"I was considering it so I thought I would try a hair piece." She takes off the brunette wig setting it on the side table next to her between the two chairs in front of my desk and smooths out her platinum blonde bob. "Now that I have your opinion, it wont be permanent."

"You have paperwork for the salons?" I'm busy today so I move us along and away from Elena's midlife crisis.

"Yes," She gets out the paperwork from her bag. "I also received your email this morning."

"Mm-hm." I hum as I quickly skim through the paperwork she just handed me.

"You no longer need a Sub." She pushes.

"That's right." I'm still focused on the salon paperwork, seems the business is doing quite well.

"Darling, you're being quite vague, are you going to talk to me about this?"

"About what?" I finally set the paperwork aside, giving her my undivided attention.

"About us." She says like it's obvious.

"What about us?" I'm clueless as to what she's referring to.

She laughs. "About what our relationship will entail."

"I'm not sure I follow." _What is she talking about?_

"Christian, I know you're not this naïve. Why are floating around the subject?"

"Elena, I honestly have no idea what the fuck you are going on about." I try to control my temper but the annoyance I feel is clear in my tone.

"Well, you said you no longer need a Sub." She says like she's trying to tell me something but I have no idea what.

"That's right, because I found my own."

"You what?!" She shrieks.

"I found someone. You weren't bringing any potentials to the table so I was forced to venture out and find my own."

"Christian, that is absurd, why would you do that, surely they saw thé Christian Grey and jumped on your dick without question."

"Actually, she doesn't know who I am." I try to control the smile fighting to break through at the thought of being seen as just... Christian.

She rolls her eyes. "Everyone knows who you are, she's obviously lying."

"Either way, I thought I would let you know not to worry about finding a Sub for me for the time being as I already have one."

"Christian, how do you know she will meet your needs? I find you submissive woman because I know what you like, darling."

"And I don't know what I like? I'm fully capable of finding my own, and I have. I was just sending you a courtesy email so you know you no longer need to look for anyone."

"I don't like it, Christian."

I knew she wouldn't, but this is her own doing, although I'm not entirely sure what she doesn't like about it.

"You don't have to like it, Elena."

 _~buzz~_

"Excuse me," I click my intercom. "Yes, Andrea."

 _"Mr. Grey, your next meeting in the conference room in ten minutes."_

"I'll be right there." I turn off my intercom. "Thank you for the salon paperwork, Elena. I have to get back to work."

 _ **~..~..~**_

 **APOV**

Christian said we'd only play on weekends and we've agreed only every other weekend. This weekend will be our first weekend, but I forgot to tell him that Kate is coming home on Sunday so I wont be able to play with him that day. I don't have his number so I log into the BDSM chat room we met on and re-activate my account so I can send him a message through that. My lunch break has just begun so I sent him the message before I head out.

 _BlushingRose:_ **Hi, Fifty. LoL. I forgot to get your number but I wanted to let you know I wont be available to play on Sunday. I have to pick up my roommate from the airport.**

 _FiftyShades:_ **_My sincerest apologies for not giving you a way to contact me. I was quite distracted last night._ ;) _Here's my cell number ###-###-####. That wont be a problem, regarding Sunday, we can play on Friday and Saturday this weekend._**

I bite my lip while reading his message to stop me from grinning like a loon. I can't stop the blush forming on my cheeks, though as I recall last night. I have been distracted all day with thoughts of us together. I can't wait until Friday.

 _BlushingRose:_ **Okay, I'll text you on your phone instead of private messaging from now on. I'm about to go to lunch so I'll see you Friday.**

 _FiftyShades:_ **_I'm looking forward to it._**

I'm still biting my lip as I close the email window and log out of my personal account on the BDSM website again.

"Me too." I whisper to my computer.

The man I saw at the café and dreamed was _FiftyShades_ really is _FiftyShades,_ and is now mine in reality _. My Fifty._ If you told me when I started chatting with _FiftyShades_ that we would be involved, I wouldn't have believed you. I can't believe it myself.

As I walk out of the building my phone rings.

"Hello, Chad." I'm cautious when I answer his call.

 _"Anastasia, I wanted to apologize for my behavior this morning."_

"You should be sorry, you have no reason to be upset that I've moved on."

 _"I know, that's entirely my fault. I get that. Are you going to lunch? I thought we could have lunch together, as friends."_

"I'm on my lunch break now, yes. And sure, where?"

 _"My place?"_

"Your place or your place?" I ask cautiously.

He chuckles and clarifies. _"My restaurant."_

"Okay, I'll see you soon."

I get in my car and drive to Garrett's Bar and Grill. It's a cute two story building on the water front with fantastic views of Elliot Bay thanks to the floor to ceiling windows on the second floor.

As soon as I park my phone rings with an unknown number. Since I don't know who it is, I ignore it.

When I walk in, the place is bustling with a lunch rush. As soon as the hostess sees me, she shows me to a table in the back where Chad is already waiting for me. He seems to be going over some paperwork, but he puts the paperwork down, setting it aside when he sees me.

"Hello, beautiful." He stands to kiss my cheek.

"Hi. I only have 30 minutes before I have to get back." I say as I look around at the busy restaurant while we sit.

"I took the liberty of ordering you a chicken wrap. It should be here soon."

"Thank you."

I love the chicken wraps here and have become obsessed with them... they're too delicious not to be.

Our food arrives shortly after I'm seated, and I begin eating.

"I've decided to take punishment off the table." He starts before he eats.

I have to swallow the bite I'm eating before I can answer and I even drink my water to wash it down.

"That's good." I take another bite because I don't have long. It took me longer than expected to get here.

He grins. "So we can try again?"

"We? No. But that's good for whomever you begin a new relationship with."

"But you said if I took punishment off the table we could try again."

"Yes, a few nights ago, and you told me no. I'm sorry, Chad, I've moved on."

"Already?" He's barely holding onto his control as his temper is getting the best of him. "Don't you think it's a bit soon. I mean, we _just_ ended."

"Chad, if you want to continue to be friends, you'll stop right now." I warn him. "I wont stand for that."

"I'm sorry, I apologize, it's just that I wanted you back, Anastasia, and now it's too late."

"That's right, it is too late. You had your chance before you left me stranded on the side of the road in the middle of nowhere." I'm still kicking myself for letting him off so easily for doing that. I guess that's why I can't let it go and keep bringing it up.

"I told you I was upset and needed to cool off. We both needed space."

"You left me stranded, Chad, with no way of knowing where I was. Something could have happened to me."

I could have been killed, but now I know I would have met Christian sooner, and he's not an internet psycho killer. If I had stayed and waited for Fifty, whom I now know is Christian, would I of let Chad off the hook so easily... I was terrified that night, looking back, and I just wanted to get out of there.

"You weren't there for long, a few minutes at the most." Like it's no big deal. "I came right back."

"I didn't know you would come back at all." I argue.

"But I did." He counters. "And you forgave me."

"I was scared!" I shout then look around the restaurant when the diners quiet down and look in our direction. "Listen, even if we worked it out and took punishments off the table, I don't think we would of lasted very long. We're just too incompatible." I admit I wanted him back, but not him, the sex.

It also wouldn't work because I'm not in love with Chad. He was my first boyfriend, sure, and I lost my virginity to him, but I don't love him. I don't feel that knees trembling, heart in my mouth, butterflies in my belly feeling with him. I feel like if you really love someone, you don't have to force it. It should come naturally. As I think of this, Christian pops into my head. I've felt that with Christian. My knees tremble, my heart soars, I have a million tiny butterflies in my belly not just went he's near me but when I think of him. _Non-emotional sexual relationship, Ana._ I shake my head and blink away the thought.

"You're compatible with _him_ then?"

"It doesn't matter who I'm with. If you want to be friends, you're going to have to accept that we are never getting back together."

He sighs. "Alright."

"Thank you."

"If you love something, set it free, right? I only want you happy, and it sucks you're not happy with me."

"Chad." I whine his name. "I was happy, don't think I wasn't, I just can't do that and you said you needed it. You don't want to be with someone who can't be what you need. You'll never be happy."

"I don't want to lose you, Anastasia, so if you're only willing to give me a friendship, I'll accept that. I don't like it, but I accept it."

"You wont lose me, I care about you too, but friendship is as far as that goes. There's just no other way for us. We can be friends, but you have to stop being so jealous and territorial over every little thing, regarding me."

"I wont interfere with any of your new relationships." He tells me.

We continue to eat, talking like friends throughout. I mention that Kate returns Sunday and tell him about my new job. He tells me about his brother Emmett and how his restaurant is doing. My phone goes off a few more times with the same unknown number, but I don't answer.

When I need to return to work, Chad walks me out and to my car, kissing my cheek before I leave.

I drive to _Grey House_ and park in the underground parking with minutes to spare before I'm to return to work.

"Where have you been?" I jump startled as I hear Christian growling behind me before I can call the elevator.

This is the second time today someone asked me that from behind. _I wish they'd stop, it's annoying!_

"Gees, Christian." I put my hand on my chest, feeling my heart beat faster, and turn around. "You startled me."

"Answer me."

I notice he's standing tall, dominant, hair unruly like he's been running his fingers through it all day, and he's glaring at me. It confuses me because we agreed to only do the control exchange in his Playroom during kinky sex scenes every other weekend or weekends I'm available. As sexy as it is, why is he acting all Dominant now?

"I was at lunch." _Isn't that evident? It is my lunch hour_.

"Where." It's not a question.

"I had lunch at Garrett's place." I tell him.

"With him?"

"Yes, I told you he's a friend."

"I don't want you seeing him again."

"Christian," I laugh a little at his ridiculous demand. "You can not tell me who I can and can not be friends with."

He's still glaring at me, and I see him clenching his jaw like he wants to say more but wont, or rather can't.

"I'm going to be late, I have to get back to work." I say when he doesn't say anything more and turn around to call the elevator. "I'll see you Friday, okay."

"I'm thinking of a scene as we speak."

"Just so you know." I stop myself from calling the elevator as I turn around to face him again. "You will not punish me for seeing a friend."

"Excuse me?"

"You heard me. I have to go."

I turn around and this time I finally call the elevator. I'm going to be late if I don't go now.

The elevator arrives so I step inside. I turn around and as soon as I push the button for the publishing floor, Christian pounces. He has my hands pinned above my head in one of his, his other hand cupping my chin and his hips pinning mine to the wall. His lips crash on mine coaxing them open as he pushes his tongue inside, dominating my mouth. He's kissing me passionately and possessively. I'm already wet and moan when I feel his erection on my belly.

I return his kiss just as passionate and possessive as him. Since he wont free my hands, I lift my leg, wrapping it around his hip and pulling him closer to me. His erection now pressing against my wet panty covered sex as he flexes his hips, pushing towards me and grinding on me. He groans in my mouth before he pulls away from our kiss, gently biting my bottom lip, pulling it with his teeth. I drop my leg, but he's still holding me.

"You. Are. Mine." He growls, gray eyes glowing.

 _Oh, I'm yours, Christian. I'm yours!_

"Say it!" He demands. "Tell me you're mine."

"Yes," I pant out. _Oh god, yes_. "I'm yours."

I can't help but to look at his sexy mouth that was just on mine. Thankfully I don't wear lipstick.

He kisses me again but quickly pulls away completely before he can deepen it when the elevator chimes it's arrival.

Before the doors open, I quickly right my bunched up skirt so I'm not giving my coworkers a show of my panties.

When the doors open on the publishing floor, I look at him. He's standing cool, calm, and collected with his hands in his pockets to hide his erection, seemingly unaffected like nothing happened, while I'm still leaning against the wall of the elevator, holding myself up, trying to control my heavy erotic breathing. Then I see him slowly exhale. He's effected, he just has a better way of controlling how he feels than I do.

 _Non-emotional, Ana._ My subconscious reminds me.

I look at the ladies behind the publishing reception desk to make sure they don't notice anything, but they are too preoccupied with work, more so than usual. It must have been busy while I was at lunch.

"Friday." Is all he says.

I nod in agreement and finally gather myself enough to step off of the elevator.

 _What is it about elevators?_

The doors close behind me, taking him to whatever floor he works on and leaving me glowing from that kiss. I can still feel my lips tingling from his and the dampness between my thighs. _Christian can kiss_. I turn around and watch the numbers climb until they stop at the 20th floor; the highest floor of the building. I knew he had to be a higher up with the apartment he lives in. He probably has a fancy title like COO or something. Mr. Grey sure does pay well. I was given a raise when GEH bought SIP with more benefits too.

I have a huge goofy grin on my face as I make my way to my desk, trying to ignore the emotions I'm feeling.

 _I can't wait until Friday_.

When I sit at my desk, before I start on the manuscripts that I need to finish today, I open my email to put Christian's number in my phone. I should have done this as soon as he sent it to me, but I was heading to lunch and didn't think about it. When I add him to my contacts list it shows he's already called me a handful of times. And that's when I realize, Christian was the unknown number calling me while I was at lunch with Chad.

 _How did he know?_

* * *

 **A/N: _To the guest reviewer who said this was 'out of character' for Christian & Anastasia. Yes, I know._ _I did label this story_ OOC _for a reason_.  
OOC = Out Of Character.**

 ** _As they are fictional characters, no one can say what the characters would or wouldn't do. But it's labeled slight OOC because they are not like their canon selves. The guest reviewer also said they didn't 'think' Christian would give up that much of the contract for Anastasia... in the 1st book they never even signed the contract and_** ** _in the 2nd book he gave up EVERYTHING in the contract to be with her_** ** _. So yes, he would._**

 ** _This author's note is just a reminder that this story is OOC and is labeled as such._**

 ** _.._**

 ** _I'll update again next year!_ ;) ;) **


	9. (9) She Knows

**CPOV**

 _What the fuck am I doing?!_

I fucking kissed her again. I don't kiss, I don't have vanilla sex, I don't have sex in my own bed, I have control over my own fucking body, I don't know what the fuck she's doing to me! I've never done anything like this with anyone before her, losing control. What's so fucking special about her?!

It's finally Friday, and I've forced myself to stay away from her until she came to my home to play, but that day and a half was nearly torture. I am determined to keep this relationship as we've defined it, strictly Dom/Sub, just as all my previous relationships were. I've given her the code for the parking garage as well as the elevator code to gain access to my apartment.

As I wait for her, I'm trying to think if I can do this, if she's worth it, to only have a Dom/Sub relationship _inside_ the Playroom and _not_ a total power exchange. I've never done this type of relationship before, and I'm not sure I like it, especially since I 'can't' punish her for having lunch with her _ex_ a couple days ago.

I put Sawyer on her and he sent me photos of her at Garrett's restaurant. I saw red and instantly became furious when I saw the photos of him touching what's mine, putting his hands on her to hug her and kissing her cheek. I'm clenching my jaw now just thinking about it. I don't like to feel envious of another. What I want, I get, no question. And that's exactly what I felt, seeing those photos of them together, jealousy.

But I will admit when she 'told' me I wasn't going to punish her for having lunch with her _ex_ , when she 'told' me to undress her during our first sexual encounter, and when she 'told' me to kiss her in our first vanilla scene, I enjoyed it. I like control and that will never change, but her taking control like that was such a fucking turn on. No wonder I attacked her in the elevator at _Grey_ _House_. I'm just unsure about this whole power exchange.

"Mr. Grey," Taylor calls my attention, bringing me from my thoughts, as he stands in my office's entryway. "Ms. Steele, is on her way up, sir."

"Thank you, Taylor. You wont be needed for the rest of the weekend." _As I plan to have my wicked way with one, Miss Anastasia Steele all weekend long._

"Sir." He nods his leave and I stand from my desk to greet Anastasia when she arrives.

I'm leaning against the wall with my arms crossed in front of me, wearing my Playroom jeans and a T-shirt, ready to play, when the elevator opens and Anastasia steps off with a small bag that I presume is her overnight bag for the weekend. She's still wearing her work attire so I'm assuming she came straight from work. This pleases me immensely. It means she's just as eager as I to play.

When she steps off the elevator completely, she's still looking down, but when she finally raises her head, she stops dead in her tracks when she sees me. I raise my brow at her expecting her to turn Submissive and bow to me but she just raises her brow right back.

I chuckle, shaking my head, as I push off the wall.

"Welcome, Ms. Steele." I greet her as I kiss her soft lips unable to control myself from the intimate display of affection.

"Thank you, Christian."

God I love hearing her say my given name. I've never loved hearing it as much as when she says it. I retract that thought, I love nothing more than to hear her scream it in the thrones of passion. Just imagining her in my bed from the other night is making me want to fuck her here and now. My dick was instantly hard for her as soon as she stepped off the elevator but now he's begging for a release.

First things first. Stopping my wayward thoughts, I grab her bag and carry it for her as I lead her into my apartment with my hand on the small of her back.

"You know, you never told me your last name."

"Didn't I?" I know I didn't, but I like the anonymity... someone not knowing who I am.

"No, you didn't. Are we getting right to it?" She asks distracted as I lead her upstairs.

I chuckle, though, I would like to get right to it.

"I'm just showing you to your room. We'll have dinner first."

"Oh." She giggles with that sexy blush. "Okay."

I lead her to the Submissive bedroom and open the door. She walks in first this time and looks around the large space.

"This will be your room while you're here on the weekends." I let her know. "You can decorate it however you'd like. If you don't like something-"

"Christian, it's fine just the way it is, really. Thank you."

"There's an ensuite through there." I point to the door then to the closet door. "And a walk-in through there."

She nods as she looks around.

"Why wont I sleep with you?"

"I told you, I don't sleep well. I work late and I wouldn't want to keep you from getting your rest." I lie smoothly, though it's partially true.

"Oh, right."

"Dinner will be ready shortly. If you want to get ready, change, shower, whatever. I'll leave you to it now and I'll see you in about 30 minutes."

"Okay, thank you."

I leave her, shutting the door for her then I walk down to the kitchen where Gail is preparing our meal. She's already set the breakfast bar for two, per my instructions.

"Dinner's almost ready, Mr. Grey."

"Thank you, Gail. I'll take it from here."

I dismiss her for the weekend after she tells me what to do, which is only take the food from the oven when the timer goes off and serve. I can easily do that.

As soon as the timer goes off, I pull out the roasted chicken and veggies, setting it on the counter then serving it on the plates provided.

I'm about to get Anastasia for dinner but when I look up she's already watching me. She's changed, and I'm quite surprise with her attire of choice. She's dressed comfortable, wearing a loose fitting white T-shirt and yoga pants with her long brunette hair in a messy bun. I've had plenty of Subs dress revealing when we've ate together to excite me, but it doesn't do a thing except earn them a punishment fuck. Yes, I get hard, but when I give my dick permission to do so, years of training with Elena. But seeing Anastasia dressed so simply, has my dick rock fucking hard.

"Sit." I point to the breakfast bar with the knife I'm using. My voice betrays me when it comes out husky instead of domineering like I intended.

I swallow hard and try to gain control of my body as I adjust to get comfortable as best as I can. _What the fuck am I around her, fourteen?!_ I continue to do what I normally would never do, serve my Submissive. I place her plate in front of her then mine where I will sit, and I'm please to see she's waiting for me to join her before she begins to eat.

Once I'm seated next to her we begin to eat.

"Mmmm." My dick twitches, seeking her when he hears her moans of pleasure. "You can really cook. This tastes amazing."

"Actually," I chuckle at the thought of my cooking being edible. "I have someone who cooks for me."

"Oh, well, be sure and thank them for me." She moans as she takes another bite. "It's delicious."

"How are you liking working for GEH?" I make conversation, another rarity for me. Anything to keep her from moaning again.

I don't converse with my Subs, they are to be quiet while I enjoy my meal that they've made for me and ready for me to fuck when I'm done, but I seriously need to think of anything other than her moans that are going straight to my adolescent dick.

"It's great." I have to look away when she smiles at me. "I love the floor to ceiling windows, and the staff are very professional. I was only working at SIP a week before it moved to GEH but I can already see the change between the two. Mr. Grey has been very gracious with keeping the publishing company. Would you thank him for me?"

"I'm sure he knows." She really doesn't know who I am, does she? _It's great_.

"You and him seemed so sure you would sell it."

"Excuse me?" I ask confused.

"I didn't mean to eavesdrop but I couldn't help but overhear you talking to him that day in the café about SIP."

I was having lunch with my father that day. I cock my head to the side. She thinks my dad is Mr. Grey? Well, me, she thinks my dad owns GEH?

"There sure are a lot of blondes that work at _Grey House_." She comments when I stay quiet.

"Mm-hm." And at this very moment I realize I am breaking another one of my many rules. Don't fuck the staff. _Fuck!_

"How long have you participated in the BDSM lifestyle?" She continues, though thankfully changing the subject from work, although I'm not sure this subject is any better.

"Awhile." I give her the usual response.

"Don't be so vague, Christian. You know how long I've been involved with it."

I should have known she wouldn't let it go. A Submissive doesn't question her Dominant, and Anastasia doesn't seem to have a Submissive bone in her delectable body. I can't wait to find out and explore the possibility that she does in the Playroom, during a scene.

"About 10 plus years." Another vague response.

"Wow. How old are you?"

"27." Soon to be 28.

"27? You were, what, 17 when you started?" She asks unbelieving.

"15." I correct her.

Her eyebrows fly to her hairline in shock.

"15?! I thought you didn't have a high school girlfriend?"

"I didn't. I had a Domme." I clarify.

"You had a 15 year old Dominant and now you're a Dominant?" I want to laugh at her confusion.

"She wasn't 15." Definitely not 15.

"How old was she? Is everybody secretly into this kinky shit?" She asks more to herself than me.

I run my hand through my hair as I decide if I should tell her about Elena.

"I was seduced by an older woman." I decide to tell her a bit of information. "She was a bored housewife in her 30s."

"Oh my god!"

"Anastasia." I warn her.

"I'm sorry." She apologizes for her outburst. "What happened to her? Is she in jail?"

"Jail?" I ask confused as to why Elena would be in jail.

"For, you know, molesting you."

"It was consensual." I growl.

"Do you still speak with her?" She squeaks in surprise.

"Yes, we're friends."

"Friends?!" The way she says it is like she can't believe it's a word, but she's friends with her ex. "You want me to stop seeing my ex turned friend but you can still see your ex-pedo and consider her a friend! That's a little pot calling the kettle black, don't you think?"

"You don't understand. No one can understand. She helped me."

"Maybe you're the one that doesn't understand. Or maybe you do... you have no acts involving children listed on your hard limits. At what age do you consider one to be of age, Christian? 15 is legally under the age of consent and YOU could go to jail for a long time if you were to be involved with someone that young." I don't like the way she's looking at me right now.

"Anastasia, don't be ridiculous. I would never do anything to a child. I was 15, just shy of 16, the age of consent. I needed it. If it wasn't for her, I would have been a druggie alcoholic that has done my fair share of time in prison, if not there permanently or worse, dead." _Like my birthmother_.

"If it wasn't for her?!" She squeaks like it's not possible.

"Do you have Stockholm Syndrome?" She asks like she's talking about the weather.

"What?"

"Stockholm Syndrome." She repeats like I didn't hear her or know the meaning. "Where hostages express empathy and sympathy and have positive feelings toward their captors, sometimes to the point of defending and identifying with the captors. She didn't hold you hostage or anything but it sounds like you have Stockholm Syndrome, the way you're defending her."

"I know what Stockholm Syndrome is." I snap.

Elena didn't fucking kidnap me or hold me against my will. I went to her eagerly and willingly.

"How can you see what she did was a good thing? How can it be consensual? You were 15, you were underage, not only under the age of 18, an adult, but under the age of consent in the state of Washington. You couldn't consent. Even if you were 16, the age of consent, you have to know it was wrong of her to do that to a vulnerable teenage boy." She shivers. "It's just wrong."

"It was consensual." I insist, annoyed with this conversation and that I'm repeating myself.

"You couldn't give consent." She counters, continuing to argue with me.

"I can and I did." I growl at her. "Now drop it, Anastasia."

She rolls her eyes, making my palm twitch. "You need therapy. Do your parents know?"

"Of course not." _And I am in therapy_.

"I can't believe you let this... this... person get away with what they did to you."

"Anastasia, I'm warning you now." I finally find and use my Dom voice. "That's enough! I've already said it once, now I'm telling you. Drop. It."

"Fine." She gets up without being dismissed and leaving way to much food on her plate for my liking as she sets her plate on the counter near the sink.

"Aren't you going to finish your food?"

"No. I seem to have lost my appetite."

"Anastasia, you need to eat." I try not to snap at her, knowing I can't punish her for her infractions.

"I do. I just can't stomach anymore right now. Are we going to play or what, if not I'll just go upstairs to that room while you sit down here and defend a pedophile."

"That room?" I ask ignoring her other remarks.

"The bedroom you've given me to use." She clarifies as she walks passed me. "Since for some reason I can't sleep with you, and you're blaming it on work and not sleeping well. The bedroom you probably give all your Submissives. I think I'll refer to it as the Submissive room."

"Anastasia, wait." I stand up to stop her, grabbing her arm gently. "I'm sorry I snapped at you." It's still so unusual for me to apologize. I don't know what to say so I explain the only reason I can think of. "I'm not use to this sort of relationship, you doing as you please. I'm used to having all the control and we've agreed to control only in the Playroom. I've never done this before so please be patient with me."

"Okay. I can understand that. And I'm sorry I got snippy about Mrs. Robinson. I shouldn't let it bother me, but it does. I mean, what if it was my son?"

"Mrs. Robinson?" I try not to smirk at the nickname she's given Elena and ignore her comments so we don't get into another argument about Elena. I didn't think she'd be this upset about it, honestly.

"I don't want to discuss her any longer, Christian. Can we just... not. Like ever."

"I don't want to talk about it any longer either." I'd very much rather fuck her and my tone is evident of that.

She's quiet, submissive, though defiantly looking me directly in my eyes. Her eyes are the most beautiful extraordinary shade of blue, and they are dark with her desire, however...

"You're not very submissive, Anastasia." I state the obvious.

"I never claimed to be." She defends herself. "I told you I was new to the lifestyle and that I just enjoyed the kinky sex. That's why I was on that BDSM chat-site. I'm not a pro and I will make plenty of mistakes during our scenes." She warns me. "And if I remember correctly, we only agreed to a power exchange during a scene so you shouldn't be surprised."

I smirk at her smart mouth.

We stand staring at each other for awhile, not saying anything more. I put some of her hair behind her ear, glide my thumb across her bottom lip, then run my finger tips down her arm, feeling the tiny bumps forming as I do. I hold both of her hands so she wont touch me as I lean down. She closes her eyes and tilts her head up to meet me.

I hear a throat being cleared breaking my concentration and the trance I'm in.

"Mr.-"

"What?!" I pull away, snapping at Taylor for interrupting us before I was able to kiss the beauty before me.

 _I gave him the fucking weekend off, for fuck's sake, what does he want?_

"Ms. Lincoln is on her way up, sir."

 _Speaking of the devil._

"Shit."

 _Good thing he didn't listen to me about taking the weekend off._

I look back at Anastasia. "Will you wait in your room and not come out until I say?"

"Why?"

"Please." I say the unusual word and ignore the urge to punish her.

"Okay." She seems a little wary, however, she does as I ask of her.

I watch as she walks away and up the stairs, enjoying the view of her ass in those skin tight yoga pants and the swing of her hips a little too much, then leave the kitchen to see what the fuck Elena wants.

 _I can't fucking believe I was going to kiss her again. I did fucking kiss her again when she arrived. Fuck! What the fuck is wrong with me?! She's completely bewitched me. She must yield some kind of magic, surely. I can't think straight when I'm with her._

I wait for Elena in the foyer. I'm already annoyed with her for unintentionally causing an argument between Anastasia and I so I'm not pleased she's here, especially unplanned. She knows I hate that shit. When she steps off the elevator her eyes are glowing as she checks me out, no doubt noticing the jeans I have on.

"Am I disturbing something?"

"You know you are." She knows I have Subs on weekends, and she know I have a Sub. "What is it, Elena?"

"I've come to meet your new play thing, darling."

"Excuse me?" I raise my brow.

"Your pet, Christian. I wanted to meet her."

"Why?" Now I cock my head to the side.

"You said you chose her yourself." Like that explains why. "I wanted to see her so I can get a better idea for the next one. I want to have someone ready and available for when she's had enough."

"No." I growl, more thinking of Anastasia leaving me than anything. It only confuses me.

"Well, how am I to find you suitable Submissives after this one has had enough? You know as well as I do, darling, that they don't last very long, not being able to meet your needs like I could. I need to meet her, darling, so I can have another available."

"Elena, I'm busy and you're not coming in." I say in my domineering tone as I call the elevator. I'm please to see it opens immediately. "I'll call you if and when I need a new Sub."

I walk back into my apartment without seeing her out and to the security office where an off duty Taylor is sitting at his desk, watching the CCTV monitors and Elena going down in the elevator. She doesn't look too pleased at me kicking her out but she should have known better.

"Taylor, I want to elevators locked. No one is to enter without my permission all weekend."

"Yes, sir."

"And take the weekend off." I remind him.

"Yes, sir." Somehow I don't believe him.

I leave Taylor and go in search for Anastasia so we can finally have our first scene together.

I knock on her bedroom door and open it before she grants me permission.

She's sitting on her bed with her legs crossed, looking a piece of paper in her hands. When I see what she's looking at, I close my eyes.

"You're Christian Grey?" She squeaks unbelieving, still looking at the NDA we signed.

 _Fuck!_


	10. (10) And So It Begins

**APOV**

"You're not very submissive, Anastasia." He states the obvious.

"I never claimed to be." In my defense, I never once told him I was. "I told you I was new to the lifestyle and that I just enjoyed the kinky sex. That's why I was on that BDSM chat-site. I'm not a pro and I will make plenty of mistakes during our scenes. And if I remember correctly, we only agreed to a power exchange during a scene so you shouldn't be surprised."

I'm literally swooning when he smirks and his eyes darken with desire. His smirks alone are enough to get me flustered, but when his eyes show his lust for me, I feel heat pool between my thighs and my insides clenching deliciously. As discreetly as possible, I squeeze my thighs together in an effort to ease the aching feeling I now have.

We stand staring at each other for awhile, not saying anything more. He puts some of my hair behind my ear, glides his thumb across my bottom lip to pull my lip free, then runs his finger tips down my neck, across my collar bone to my arm. He slowly slides his hands down my arms to hold both of my hands. I close my eyes, knowing what's to come, as I lift my head up to meet him and reach up on my tiptoes when he leans down to kiss me.

I hear a throat being cleared, breaking our concentration so I blink open my eyes and fall back onto my feet. "Mr.-"

"What?!" Christian snaps, pulling away before our lips can even touch and before Taylor can say anything more. _Like Christian's last name!_

"Ms. Lincoln is on her way up, sir." Taylor lets Christian know of his visitor. _Lincoln? Surely it can't be..._

"Shit." Christian says under his breath, but I hear him.

 _What's wrong?_

"Will you wait in your room and not come out until I say?" He asks me.

"Why?"

"Please."

I don't want to upset him as we've just got into an argument, and that's not how I want to spend our first weekend together, so I do as he asks. Besides, no one is to know of our involvement. If he has a visitor, it would be wise for me not to be seen.

"Okay."

I hope everything is alright, he didn't seem pleased.

In the room, my room, I sit on the bed and realize I don't know much about this man that I am entering into a sexual relationship with. I don't even know his last name. I mentioned it earlier, that he didn't tell me, and he brushed it off. _Why is he not telling me?_

I remember the NDA we signed is still in my bag so I grab my bag and sit on the bed again, this time crossing my legs, so I can read his full name. Since I sprung the ridiculous idea of him signing an NDA for me, I have two copies, but our names are not printed on either copy. I'll have to read his signature and try to make it out. I can barely read it, he wrote the _C_ very largely as well as a _G_ for his last name.

I'm still trying to make out what the last name says when I hear a knock on my door. There's no way I can make out what this says as he opens the door, it's like a doctor wrote it, but then it comes back to me that Chad asked if I was with 'Grey' now, and Christian is the only man Chad has seen me speaking with. Christian... Grey... Christian Grey. Oh.. My... God! Christian Grey?! CEO of GEH and owner of Grey Publishing, Christian Grey? My boss, Christian Grey?!

"You're Christian Grey?" I ask him to confirm but it comes out more like a squeak than my normal tone.

"Yes." He finally admits, sounding upset.

"Why didn't you tell me?" I look at him now. "Why do you keep things from me?"

 _God, good thing I didn't call him Christian at work in front of anybody!_

"Because I liked you not knowing who I was."

"What does that mean?"

"You didn't look at me, Christian Grey, CEO billionaire, you looked at _me_ , just Christian, and I liked it. It felt..." He pauses looking for a way to explain it. "good," Seems to be the word he finds. "really good. ...like a breath of fresh air. I've not felt that before, in fact I haven't felt many things until I met you."

 _Now what does_ that _mean?_

"I'm sorry you feel the need to hide who you are because you wrongfully think I will look at who you are as a person differently. This relationship is supposed to be based off trust. How can I trust someone who constantly keeps valuable information from me."

"I know. I'm sorry, I have no excuses." He stays standing in the entryway as he apologizes, not entering the room. "I should have told you as you would have found out eventually and I know it would have been better coming from me. I promise, Anastasia, I will endeavor to be more forthcoming in the future."

I can understand the fascination of being seen as someone unknown and ordinary. He's a very wealthy and well known man. Well, I didn't know who _he_ was, but I knew _of_ Mr. Grey of GEH. Then again I only knew because GEH bought SIP.

"SIP." I say, remembering the conversation I overheard. "You bought it. _You_ said you were selling it, I heard you. Why did you keep it?" I swallow hard waiting to hear the answer I assume I already know.

"Isn't it obvious?" He shrugs, and I can't tell if it's apologetically or not.

I just shake my head.

 _I knew it! I freaking knew! He kept SIP because of me. What kind of businessman makes executive decisions based off of who he's currently fucking?!_

He wasn't fucking me at the time he decided to keep it. So he kept it to what... I guess it's not so obvious.

I don't know how his other relationships worked, but how can I have a sexual relationship with my boss, not just my boss, but the CE-fucking-O of the company! If anyone found out they would accuse me of sleeping my way to the top. I don't want to be seen as the office slut who gets what she wants by laying on her back and spreading her legs.

Who would have thought the CEO of Grey Enterprises and Holdings was a BDSM Dominant, for years. He said he liked the way I looked at him... What's that supposed to mean, I didn't look at him like he's my own personal ATM? He said he didn't like condoms. He's had so many women, I wonder if he trusts them to use their birth-control correctly or if he's had a vasectomy so they can't trap him. What would he do if he knocked up a Sub? Pay her off and punish her? I'm sure that would work out well. He-

"Anastasia," Christian brings me from my thoughts. I always seem to overthink. "Please don't let who I am change this. We're not in a romantic relationship, it's just-"

"Sex." I cut him off, interrupting him. "It's just sex."

"I'm well aware." He says angrily, eyes blazing, jaw clenching.

 _Why is he so angry? That's what it is. Just sex._

"Christian," _Shit, do I not call him by his given name any longer?_ "Mr. Grey, I can't do this-"

"No." He interrupts me now, finally stepping into the room. "I wont let you end this because of who I am. If it's something I did, or we were incompatible, fine, but not because of who I am, please."

I watch as his Adam's apple moves when he swallows hard. He looks almost desperate as he runs his fingers nervously through his hair.

"But don't you see? That's the reason this can't happen. You're my boss. Oh my god." I put my head into my hands, freaking out, when I realize we've already had sex. "I'm fucking my boss. I fucked my boss. Oh my god."

"Technically, I'm your boss's boss's boss." I think he's trying to lighten the mood with this lame attempt of a joke. I almost expect him to say _'and at the moment we're not fucking'_ but I don't think that would help our situation.

"That's worse," I squeak, looking up at him. "You're not just my boss, you're _thee_ boss. How can we do this if you're the CEO of the company I work for?!"

"Look, I know you said you wouldn't feel comfortable dating your boss, but I'm not your direct boss and we're not dating." He tries to sound reasonable.

"No, we're not." I agree. "We're definitely not dating, we're just fucking. And I repeat, that's worse. I'm not dating the boss. I'm just fucking him. When everyone finds out, they'll assume I'm fucking you to better my career. And you heard me right when I said _'when'_ not _'if'_ because I guarantee people will find out." Especially if he keeps kissing me in the elevator, practically fucking me against the wall. _Okay, I admit, I'm partly to blame for that_. "Not to mention, you admitted to keeping SIP because of me."

"I assure you that nobody will find out about us." He seems so sure.

I just huff and roll my eyes, unbelieving, only to flush and squirm when I see his eyes darken with desire.

 _Note to self, Ana: don't look into his eyes._ His sexy, piercing, extraordinary gray eyes.

He moves his jaw a bit before he continues. "I'm a very private man, Anastasia. I value my privacy, and I go a long way to protect it."

"Well, what about your staff?" _Maybe, just maybe if nobody knows..._

"At GEH? I told you-"

"No, here." His driver, Taylor saw me. I'm not sure what other staff is here; he did say he has someone that cooks for him, perhaps a maid as well.

"My staff only know what I tell them. It's non of their or anyone's business what I do, what we do. Sexually or otherwise. Unless we tell them. They've signed an NDA as well, and I assure you, they're very discreet."

I don't know what to say. I guess that's the reason he had me sign the NDA, so I wont run to the nearest tabloid with Christian Grey's darkest secret.

"I've been doing this for many years, Anastasia, and my own family doesn't even know who I really am, what I really am, what I enjoy." He continues to assure me that no one will find out. "In fact they think I'm a closeted gay or a virgin because they have never seen me with a woman before. My family doesn't know about my previous Submissives and I promise, no one will know of this relationship, except you and I."

I fist my hand and bite my thumbnail as I think about this.

 _What's there to think about?! ... I can't do this!_

 _Oh, but I want to_.

The way he makes me feel, not only during sex, but just being in his presence. _What am I thinking?!_ I can't sleep with the CEO of the company I work for! But I'm not sleeping with him, we're just fucking, having incredible amazing sex. If I do this, continue doing this, I will feel like his dirty little secret. But that's what it was supposed to be, a secret.

And his own family thinks he's gay? _Why?_ Just because he doesn't introduce his Submissives? Surely he's shown interest in women before, especially during his youth. Actresses, singers, other famous woman, girls in his high school, so that can't be true. Wait, he had Mrs. Pedo. Maybe she forbid him from showing interest in girls his own age. But how is that possible? You can't stop someone from being attractive to someone.

Now I'm overthinking again when I should be considering continuing this absurd arrangement with him, my boss.

I feel like I have good Ana vs. naughty Anastasia on my shoulders, pulling me in both directions. I have a feeling I know which will win this mental tug-of-war, and I wont like the winner in the end. Good Ana always wins, overpowering naughty Anastasia.

"Please, Anastasia." I look up, feeling the bed shift and see he is sitting on the bed with me now. "Please."

 _Why does he look so sexy when he runs his fingers through his hair, causing it to stand on end?_ He's been running his fingers through his hair throughout our whole conversation and now it looks just fucked. It's arousing. _NO, Ana!_

 _Oh, who am I kidding?! I want him!_

"Fuck it." I decide to throw caution to the wind, since I already have, and launch myself at him, letting naughty Anastasia win for once.

He somehow moves as quick as lightening, twisting his body so I am pinned underneath him. He holds my hands in one of his above my head, tilts my chin up with his other hand and smashes his lips to mine, kissing me so passionately. Our tongues meet as his hand moves to roams my body, grabbing my breast through my shirt, gliding down to my hip and roughly pulling at my yoga bottoms.

Suddenly he sits up and pulls my bottoms off along with my panties, tossing them aside, then reaches inside his jeans pocket to take out a foil packet. He unzips his jeans, takes out his large erection, opens the condom packet with his teeth then easily slides it on. I squirm with need, watching him. He falls on top of me, grabbing my hands again and holding them as he kisses me.

"Christian." I murmur against his mouth, trying to free my hands. "I want to touch you."

"I know."

He doesn't let go of my wrists as he enters me. I throw my head back at the sudden feeling of being full, as his dick stretches me, and moan loudly.

I continue to move with him, meeting his urgent thrusts. He moves my hands above my head and holds them in one of his again as he kisses and nibbles on my jaw while his other hand grabs my thigh and roughly yet gently lifts it, resting my thigh almost on his hip, so he can go even deeper. He circles his hips as he holds my ass, pulling me closer, while he grunts and groans in pleasure.

I moan when I feel my insides starting to clench and tighten around him already.

"Oh, don't stop, _please_ , don't stop."

We move faster together. I'm so close, right on the edge.

"Christian!" It doesn't take long for me to cum.

"Oh, fuck!" He roars following me. "Yes!"

When he pulls out of me he kneels up, takes off his condom, knotting it and tossing it into the trash, then pulls up his jeans that he couldn't be bothered to take off. I pull down my T-shirt to cover myself a little and when I do, I see red marks on my wrists from him holding my hands down. It's hot, but...

"Why do you hold me?" I ask as I rub my wrists, but he doesn't answer me.

He gets off the bed and grabs my pants. I catch them when he tosses them to me, and quickly put them on then get off the bed too.

"Why can't I touch you?" I ask again.

"Hard limit." Is all he says before he leaves the room.

 _Hard limit?_ Touching is a hard limit? But we're not in a scene. It's vanilla.

This is the second time he's gotten dressed immediately after we've had sex. Now he leaves the room completely.

We just had a conversation about me staying and he seemed almost desperate for me to continue this with him, but he just fucks me and leaves. Now he wont tell me why I can't touch him, why he holds me. So much for being more honest with me. He's starting to make me feel like I'm just here for a fuck, but I guess that's what I signed up for. I'm so confused. He seemed so lost when I was going to say no, why would he leave the room after I agreed to stay and we had sex? I'm sensing something is wrong, but what?

 _ **~..~..~**_

 **CPOV**

I had to get out of there. I don't know what the fuck I would have done if I stayed. My emotions and control are going haywire. That's the second time we've had sex and both times were vanilla sex, although, this time was spontaneous. I'm not sure that's any better than _planned_ vanilla. I've never had spontaneous sex, I've always had planned sex in controlled scenes.

 _What the fuck is happening to me? I'm losing my fucking control!_

I need to calm myself down and get control of my emotions that seem to be running erratic around this girl.

I stop pacing and running my fingers through my hair, and I sit at my piano. My piano is one of few things that can calm me.

As I play, I think about the beauty in the Submissive room upstairs.

I'm so fucking glad she chose to stay, and even called out my name, my given name, during sex, however, if it's like this in the Playroom, I don't see this arrangement working. Her calling out my name and cuming without my permission, the way she matches my thrusts, also she's very verbal during sex, which is hot, really hot, erotic, but I like my Subs quiet, still, and only cuming if I grant them permission. The only way to find out if this will work is to take her to my Playroom and test her limits. I have a feeling of dread that she wont be able to satisfy my needs.

Before I can get lost in the piece I am playing, I see her coming down the stairs in my peripheral vision.

"Is everything okay?" She asks me sweetly as she walks toward me.

"Anastasia, I want to scene with you." I'm using my Dom voice without looking at her, so I don't hesitate and get all soft again, as I continue to play the piece without faltering. "I want you in the Playroom in fifteen minutes in the Submissive pose near the door, wearing only your panties. I want you in lace or silk, if you don't have lace or silk, you may be nude, and I _will_ buy you panties that I desire for you to wear." She stays quiet, but I don't dare look at her. "Do you understand me?"

"Yes, sir."

I stop playing and finally look at her to see her head bowed. It pleases and calms me instantly. I also notice she's holding a piece of paper so I stand and hold my hand out for it. She obediently puts the paper in my hand without further instruction. I smile as I read it, seeing it's her clean bill of health as well as a doctor's confirmation that she is in fact on birth control. _No more condoms_. I feel my smile turn into a massive megawatt grin. Thank fuck she can't see me.

"Go, now." I snap.

Keeping her head bowed, she quickly turns on the ball of her foot, somewhat how Taylor does, and quickly exits the main room, going upstairs to do what she's told without hesitation. It's time to show her how Dominant I can be. However, since this is our first scene together, I plan to go easy on her. I enjoyed vanilla so much so that I planned to incorporate it into our first play session. I wanted to spice up vanilla when we first had sex, but she said no. _That's still so new to me, someone telling me no, and I actually listen._ So I'm planning to spice up vanilla in our scene today.

As eager as I am to fuck her again, even thought I've just had her minutes earlier, I want her to be anticipating, so I take my sweet ass time walking to the Playroom.

I grab the door handle, knowing it's unlocked from earlier, and take a deep breath before I open the door. I know she's new and needs training but this is it. This is our first scene. It's make or break time.

Slowly I open the door and enter, seeing her in the Submissive pose near the door. I'm pleased to see her in lace panties. Those ugly plain white cotton panties did not do her justice. Before I do anything I make sure there is a robe hanging on the door. I'll need to use it for her when we've finished. After confirming I have a robe at the ready, I lock my Playroom door behind me. Not that anyone would enter.

I don't approach her right away, letting her feel the anticipation while I walk around the room, letting the control fill my veins. I take a deep calming breath, closing my eyes, as I let it absorb me. In this room I am in control, I am Dominant and I decided what the fuck happens. _I will_ NOT _lose control in here!_

I finally gather the items I need for our spiced vanilla scene. I grab some of the silk ribbon from a drawer, putting it in my back pocket as well as a blindfold, so I wont lose control by looking into her hypnotizing blue eyes. I grab a pair of nipple clamps, putting them in my pocket as well, then walk towards her.

"Stand." I command her when I'm directly in front of her, and she does so, keeping her head bowed, without hesitation.

"Turn around." I'm please when she does, not only immediately but without speaking.

I gather her hair into three equal sections and swiftly interweave them into a perfect braid with the tail end falling in the middle of her lower back as I tie it with an elastic I have in my pocket. After it's in place, I wrap the braid around my fist and pull her back to me, forcing her to tilt her head up as I run my nose behind her ear, inhaling her scent. _Oh fuck!_ I can feel my pupils dilate as I take her in. She smells incredibly irresistible, intoxicating. I'm pleased when she stays quiet when I nibble on her delicate neck and smack her ass with my other hand, though I do see her swallow hard. I smirk as I run my nose along her neck to her bare shoulder.

"What I could do to you, Ms. Steele." I murmur in a husky tone against the crook of her neck.

I almost expect her to speak but she obediently remains silent.

I release my hold of her to place the blindfold on her, then lead her to a corner of the room where a carabiner and a bar are installed into the ceiling so she can hold onto it if need be.

"Hold out your hands."

I tie them together with the ribbon swiftly when she does, and then connect it to the carabiner. I am able to walk around her, taking in her beautiful sight. My first unhurried look at her body. Our first sexual encounter, it was dark. Our second, I just removed her bottoms, leaving her shirt on. She's flawless, Aphrodite.

Even though she is blindfolded, she keeps her head bowed obediently. It pleases me. Now would be the time I would allow myself to get hard, if I wasn't so already.

Wrapping my arm around her waist, I pull her towards me, lean down and latch onto her nipple. I feel her body tense up as she tries to keep quiet. Her heavy breathing is making me grow. I release her nipple with a pop, reach into my pocket and add on the nipple clamp. Then I continue to do the same with her other nipple.

I lick my lips and drop to my knees in front of her. Her head is still bowed Submissively, but since she's blindfolded she can't see me. I run my nose along her panty covered slit while I look up at her. I can see the blush on her cheeks, as I inhale her arousal, but she stays completely silent.

"Mmmm. You smell delicious, Anastasia. " I inhale her delicious scent once more. "I can't wait to taste you."

I look at her again when she remains quiet.

 _Why am I feeling like I'm missing something?_

I shake my head to clear it and continue with my task. I reach up and loop my fingers into her sexy lace panties and peel them off of her slowly. When I get to her feet, I command her to step out of them then put them in my pocket after I've inhaled her sweet intoxicating scent one last time from her panties.

"Mmmm." I involuntarily let out a moan when I see her naked and tied up for my pleasure.

Unable to control myself any longer, I dive right in and taste her, running my tongue flat and curling the end as I stop at her clit, pulling it into my mouth and sucking greedily. I feel her leg and stomach muscles tighten at the sudden and unannounced intrusion. She lets out a surprised gasp and a tiny moan, but I let it slide with her inexperience. She's already so fucking wet and tastes just as I imagined she would, exquisite, like she was made precisely for me.

To get a better angle, I lift her, placing her thighs on my shoulders. This gives my mouth the perfect access to her glistening pussy as I continue to torture her with my tongue.

"Oh." She gasps when I suddenly stand, holding her ass and keeping her on my shoulders.

Ignoring her moans, I tell her about the bar she may hold onto if needed. I watch her as I continue my monstrosities and see she's biting her lip, hard, so she doesn't make a sound, and fuck me if that doesn't make me want to blow my load. I continue to lick, suck, nibble, getting her close to her release but not giving her permission. I so badly want her to cum in my mouth but more than that I want to give her an unforgettable orgasm so she will be saying 'Garrett who?'.

When she's on the edge I stop completely. She gives a small whimper of disappointment, but otherwise remains silent.

 _Don't worry, baby, I'm going to be having you cuming like a freight train all over my dick_.

"Do you want to cum, Ms. Steele?"

"If it pleases you, sir." I smirk when I hear this.

I wouldn't say she's the perfect Submissive, but at least she's trying.

I ease her slowly down so she's standing in front of me, restrained, blindfolded, and flushed. Her mouth is open slightly to accommodate her heavy breathing. She looks beautiful. Mine.

Continuing with my planned scene, I kick off my jeans and lift her. I instruct her to wrap her legs around me and she does so without hesitation, locking her ankles together. Knowing she's wet for me, I look down between us as I enter her, slowly this time so she feels every inch of me while I watch my dick disappear inside her. She so warm, wet, and tight. I've never been with someone so fucking tight before and I fucking love it! I hold still, enjoying the feel of being balls deep inside of her.

After a moment, I begin to move at my usual pace. We're both sweating and panting. She's surprisingly quiet this time, but I'm grunting, shamelessly. Our mouths are so close, just inches apart, as we breathe and fuck. I want to kiss her. I turn my head just shy of touching those soft beautiful lips. Her sharp intake of breath breaks my concentration. _Fuck! What the fuck am I thinking?!_ I bypass her lips and kiss just behind her ear.

 _I can't do this, I can't lose control, not here!_

Instead of fucking her like this, I make a split second decision to fuck her from behind so I wont get distracted. I pull out of her, set her on the floor, then release her from the carabiner but keep her hands tethered together. I lead her to my whipping bench. I was going to fuck her standing, as it's one of my favorite positions, but I don't think that's a good idea seeing as I almost lost control in the room I feel the most control. Not once have I ever broken a hard limit, kissing is her hard limit during scenes.

 _What the fuck is she doing to me?_

I bend her over, as I plan to take her from behind now, and connect her restraints to the carabiner that is underneath my bench, but I keep her on her elbows so her nipples will rub against the bench when I take her. This will stimulate her sensitive nipples and give her an amazing release.

Seeing her in this position gives me an idea. I walk to my chest of drawers, pulling open the 'butt drawer' and getting out my smallest butt plug. I buy all new toys for each Submissive so I know it's sterile and ready. I'll need some lube so I grab that as well, then I grab a spreader bar.

I put the lubricant and the butt plug on the bench next to her hip so I can shackle her ankles to the spreader bar. Now she wont be able to move. I think I did pretty fucking well for a last minute change in the spiced vanilla scene. I grab the lubricant and the butt plug to get started with this new set up. She flinches when I apply lubricant.

"Relax, Anastasia, it's just lube." I reassure her gently. _Gently?_ _What the fuck?! Why am I talking like this?!_

I continue to rub it on her, then insert my pinkie, feeling her ass grip me. _Fuck, she's tight!_ As much as I would love to claim her ass right fucking now, she's much too tight for my dick. I'd rip her in half. I add a bit more lubricant, then slide in the butt plug. It will increase her pleasure when she cums as I pull it out at just the right moment, and that's what I'm aiming for, to please her. Fuck her into oblivion so to speak.

"Are you ready for me, Ms. Steele?" I get back in my Dominant persona.

I fist my erection, running it along her slit, coating him in her juices. _She's still so fucking wet_. I let out another involuntary groan.

"Yes." She breathes out, trying to push her ass back as best as she can to get me to enter her.

I smack her ass, hard, mainly for causing my dick to twitch in excitement and wanting her.

"Yes, sir." She quickly corrects her mistake before I have the chance to say anything, her ass already turning pink where I've struck her.

I rub her ass where I've spanked her, feeling the warmth beneath my hand and smacking her again, then I run my hand down her thigh and bringing it up to her sex.

"Oh, Ms. Steele," I moan when I run my fingers along her wet folds, feeling how soaked she really is. "You _are_ ready for me." I agree.

 _So. Fucking. Wet!_

I hold her hips as I run my dick along her slit, bumping the head of my erection into her clit each time I pass. She moans quietly and finally lets out a loud moan of pleasure when I slam into her not stopping as I pull back out and enter her tight pussy again and again, continuing a punishing rhythm.

All too soon she begins to quiver, so I pull out, only keeping the head of my dick inside of her until she's calm. I continue, but at a much, much slower torturous pace. I push in hard, circle my hips to grin into her, smack her ass hard and pull out just as slowly. I continue the pattern until she quivers again. I know she's enjoying herself because each time my hand makes contact with her ass, her pussy contracts and tightens around my dick.

I wont punish her for cuming without permission, this time, but I want to see how much she can take before she needs to release, so I position my dick at just the right angle to perfectly hit her g-spot each time and continue to fuck her, testing her limits of pleasure.

"Quiet." I reprimand her when she moans loudly and smack her ass again.

I grunt and groan as I continue to torture, not only her, but myself. If she doesn't cum or say something soon, I may make a fool of myself and blow my load too soon.

"Please!" She finally begs me after awhile, I almost think it was me that was the one pleading for her to cum.

"Please what, Ms. Steele?" I demand, panting, as continue to hit that sweet spot over and over and _Oh, fuck, this feels so fucking good._

"Please, please may I cum, sir." She begs just barely hanging on. "Please."

"Oh, baby," _THANK FUCK!_ "You may. Now."

I pull the buttplug out just as she begins, tossing it aside. I wrap one hand around her braid, pulling her head back, and hold her hip with my other, constantly slamming into her, while she cums, squeezing my dick with a vice like grip over and over as her muscles contract. I can barely move my dick, she's gripping it so tightly.

I almost expect her to be vocal while she cums, expecting to hear her scream my name, at least moan, something, but she's quiet, not even moaning. I'm conflicted with how I feel about this. Both times we've had sex, she'd scream my name and cum without permission, and I had the urge to punish her for it. Now she cums with permission and cums quietly at that. I would love to have punished her for it now; cuming without my permission and calling out my given name in a scene. _Who the fuck am I kidding, I would have just loved to hear it._

I try not to cum with her, but once she starts convulsing into a mind-blowing orgasm, she greedily takes me with her.

"Say my name." I pant through my release, almost begging her.

I want to hear it. I want to hear her say it. I want to hear her say my name. My name in pleasure.

She stays quiet but gives me a small whimper.

"Say it!" I'm able to sound more Dominant, demanding her.

"Christian!" She moans my name, squeezing my dick as she falls into another orgasm.

"Fuck!" I call out with a roar, as I grip her hip tighter to the point of bruising, and cum a second time just as hard as the first when the sight of my seed leaking out of her and my name on her lips tips me over the edge.

My dick is completely covered, drenched in our shared arousal, when I pull out of her. I look at her as I pant, trying to catch my breath. My cum is all over her, dripping down her thighs as well as her own juices. _Have I ever came so hard?_ I thought us having sex earlier would hold me off so I wouldn't cum so fast, but it seems that was useless. Well... not useless, just useless that it didn't hold me off.

 _Will I ever get enough of her?_

I would continue to fuck her but she's on the edge of oblivion, and I don't want her to pass out on me since she didn't eat much of her dinner, so I put my jeans back on and grab the robe I intend to use for her. I quickly wipe her legs and pussy, release her from her restraints, remove the nipple clamps, and take off her blindfold, then carry her limp body bridal style to her bedroom.

I smirk as I lay her on her bed and see her grinning at me, looking sleepy yet satisfied, definitely well fucked.

I leave her for a moment and walk into her ensuite to run her a bath.

"Chadwick fucking Garrett who?" I mutter as I fill the tub, mentally beating my chest like a fucking caveman.

I walk back out to the bedroom, holding my hand out to her so I can help her into the ensuite.

I remove her robe and help her into the tub. I grab the bottle of soap and a small wash towel then kneel down and begin to wash her sexy body.

This is the kind of aftercare I can do, none of that cuddling bullshit after vanilla.

"Why don't you join me?" Her voice is sweet, soft, warm and inviting.

"I think I will." Another first. I've never bathed _with_ my previous Subs before, but I do need cleaning as well so I might as well.

I drop my jeans, kicking them off then climb in behind her. Keeping an eye on her hands, I pull her back toward me so she's leaning against my chest. It feels alien but not painful. I reach around to cup her full breast, letting my other hand with the cloth clean her sweet pussy.

"Oh, Christian." She moans, pushing her breast into my hand.

I smirk and shake my head at her. _Well, at least in the Playroom she's more Submissive_.

"You did well." I kiss her head as praise her.

"I enjoyed our first scene."

"As did I."

I'd like to do more in this tub than cleanse, but her yawning is telling me she doesn't have the strength or energy for more.

 _Stamina, Anastasia_.

"Let's get you to bed."

"Bed?" Is that hope I hear? She wants more fucking? I want more fucking! But I know she's just barely hanging on.

"To sleep." I assure her.

I kiss her head once more before I get out, wrapping a towel around my waist, then I help her out of the tub.

"Turn around." I tell her as I grab the arnica cream.

I didn't strike her that hard, although, her ass is still a glorious shade of pink.

"You have a sexy ass, Anastasia." I feel the need to let her know as I rub the healing cream on her delectable behind.

I don't have to look to know she's blushing, but I do. I glance in the mirror to see her biting that lip and that sexy natural blush.

When I'm finished I grab a towel for her and wrap it around her as I kiss her lips, nibbling on her bottom lip. I don't know what the fuck brought that on but I enjoy kissing her, no need to deny it. I'm doing all sorts of things I've never done before with her so I might as well accept it. And we're not in a scene anymore so I can fucking kiss her if I want, and I want. So I kiss her once more before, I grab my Playroom jeans and leave the bathroom with her.

"Shouldn't we.." She pauses to yawn as we walk back into her bedroom together. ".. clean the Playroom?"

"I'll do that." I kiss her lips again. "Get dress and into bed. I have plans for you tomorrow and I need you well rested."

When she turns to get her bag, I give her ass a slap, causing her to yelp in surprise. I smirk and enjoy watching her dress, which is just plain cotton panties, sleep shorts and a camisole top. I shake my head. She should be in satin or silks, but why is it the simplest of cotton can turn me the fuck on like a teenage boy going through puberty? This towel around my waist is doing nothing to hide my prominent erection.

 _How in the world can she make these items so damn delectable?_

I'm brought out of my thoughts when she climbs in bed and covers her body from my viewing pleasure. She yawns again as she gets settled in her bed and is comfortable enough to already start to drift.

"Goodnight, Anastasia."

"Goodnight, Christian."

I smile when I hear her use my given name as I leave the room.

I feared she would treat me differently once she knew who I was, but she hasn't. It's like knowing who I am is still a mystery to her even though she knows I own GEH. _And it's wonderful_.

While my Subs usually clean the Playroom, I'm being unusually soft towards Anastasia for some strange unexplainable reason, and she did do exceptionally well tonight, so I walk to the Playroom to clean up our fun.

When I'm finished, I check on my sleeping girl. She looks so beautiful, young and peaceful as she sleeps.

I leave her to sleep and walk to my room.

After putting on some boxer briefs, I lay on my bed with my hands behind my head.

I'm so fucking glad she agreed to stay. I don't know what the fuck she's doing to me, and I wouldn't be surprised if she's into witchcraft, but I'm never going to let her go. She's mine. I've been fighting these feelings so much so to the point of being curt with her. I don't want her to leave me for being so cold towards her so I'm going let them take the control that they seem to take. I'll stay Dominant in the Playroom as planned, but outside of the Playroom, I am going to enjoy the fuck out of vanilla for the first time ever. And kissing her. Definitely more kissing.

 _Dare I say it?_ I'm happy. I'm _finally_ happy.

I drift to sleep with a smile on my face.


	11. (11) Accepting Vanilla

**APOV**

I'm not a morning person and enjoy sleeping in on the weekends so when the sunlight shines through the floor to ceiling windows and onto my face, I burry my head into the pillow to try and get a few more minutes of sleep, but then I realize I'm not in my bed so I slowly blink my eyes open and look around the room I'm in. The luxurious bedding and designer furniture reminds me I'm not in Kansas anymore.

My muscles feel great. I slept surprisingly well for not being in the comfort of my own home and bed. I always felt uncomfortable sleeping over anywhere, I don't know why, yet here I felt at ease.

I stretch and yawn, remembering our first scene last night. _Wow._ That's the only word I have as I have never, in my short experience with sex, came so hard, so hard that I could barely speak or make a sound. Then he demanded I say his name, and I tried, really I did, but nothing came out until I came down from my orgasm to finally speak, and screaming _his_ name sent me into another amazing orgasm. _Christian._

Since I'm a guest in his home, I guess I can't sleep in, so I get out of bed, grab my bag, and go to the ensuite.

After I do my morning business, I wash my hands, brush my teeth, then take my hair out of the braid it's still in from last night, giving my hair soft beautiful waves. Instead of brushing it and ruining the waves, I run my fingers through my hair.

I decided to bring a dress to wear today since I'm not sure what his plans are, but if it involves me naked, which I know will happen at some point today, the dress will be easier to take off.

I change into sexier lingerie than my cotton panties and put on the comfy, casual summer dress then go downstairs in search of my Dominant.

It's quiet downstairs with no one in sight.

As I walk passed the main room, I glance at the piano in the corner near the windows. I woke last night and thought I heard a piano.

 _I wonder if Christian was playing last night?_

I walk towards his room and knock on the door. When he doesn't answer I open the door cautiously, peaking inside, but he's not in here, his bed empty, so I shut the door and continue my search. There are plenty of doors in the penthouse apartment but I don't bother with them as I make my way to his office.

I knock on the door and this time I hear him.

 _"Enter."_ His voice sounds very controlled.

I open the door to see him busy with paperwork and on his computer, busy with work I'm sure. When he sees it's me, he shuts his laptop.

"You look beautiful." He smiles, his eyes roaming my body.

"I didn't mean to disturb you."

"It's fine." He grins at me, making my knees weak. "I was just busying myself with a few things until you woke."

"Sorry." I giggle, apologizing for sleeping in, but instantly stop when he stands.

 _How can this man look so good?_

He's dress casual today in a T-shirt and jeans but I notice they are not the distressed jeans he wore in the Playroom.

I bite my lip when I remember the Playroom. I may have been blindfolded, but I swear he almost kissed me. I wouldn't have minded, but it would have messed with my Sub-concentration and I would no longer be in obedient Sub-mode. I wonder if he would have punished me for being vocal or cuming without his permission in the Playroom. I loved being spanked while he took me from behind and wanted him to do it harder. I squirm just thinking about it.

"Did you sleep well?" His husky voice brings me from my dirty thoughts of last night.

"What?" And cue blush as I look up at him, standing in front of me now. "Oh, yes."

I wonder how long he's been up and if he's eaten anything.

"Have you ate yet?" I mimic is husky tone. "Breakfast! Have you had breakfast yet?" I feel the heat on my cheeks intensify as I quickly clarify myself. "Do you want some?" _Oh god, it sounds like I'm hinting for sex_. "Do you want to eat?" _Oh god! Now I'm hinting at oral sex!_ "Are you hungry?!" I finally squeal out, but that doesn't sound any better.

"Very." He sounds and looks amused at my flustering as he tries and fails not to smile.

 _Are you laughing at me, Mr. Grey? I'll bet he is._

"Are you _hungry_ , Ms. Steele?" He challenges with a smirk.

He only calls me Ms. Steele in the Playroom.

"Famished." I accept his challenge as I gaze at him through my lashes.

He takes my hand in his as we walk, hopefully to the Playroom to 'eat', but we walk passed the stairs and towards the kitchen together.

"What are we having?" I ask him, my voice finally normal again.

"Whatever you make is fine."

"Whatever I make?" I thought _I_ was the guest?

"I told you, I don't cook. My Subs usually cook for me on the weekends."

"Well, I'm only your Sub in the Playroom so if you want to eat, you'll help."

"What?" He laughs the word like I'm joking.

"You really should learn to cook. It's a basic necessity. We can make pancakes, bacon, and eggs. _Together_."

He smirks, shaking his head as I start listing the ingredients we'll need in a serious no nonsense tone.

He starts to gather everything we'll need while I go in search of some mixing bowls. I try a few cabinets, but I can't find them.

"Where are your mixing bowls?"

"Top cabinet." He nods with his hands full of ingredients from the fridge.

I open the top cabinet and stand on my tippy toes trying to reach the bowls. I gasp when I feel him behind me and his hand come into my view, to grab the bowls, while his other hand holds me around my waist. I quickly turn around to face him after he's grabbed the bowls and releases his hold on me. I know I am blushing when I see that sexy smirk on his sexy face. He leans down and kisses me gently before he moves away. I lean against the cabinets trying to calm myself as I watch him move around the kitchen effortlessly, like he knows exactly what he's doing, gathering the rest of the ingredients I told him we'll need.

 _Am I the only one affected here?!_

"What do we do first?" He asks after he has everything set up.

I clear my throat and begin explaining what we do first as well as everything else, and together we get to work, making our breakfast.

It takes us both longer than necessary to figure out how to work his top of the range stove, and he almost heads to the staff apartment to ask his cook how to work it, but we eventually figure it out ourselves.

Throughout the process of making our food, we brush against each other, teasingly. He's winning, I think. He's much more impassive and good at hiding the way he feels, but when my ass brushes against the front of his pants, I can tell he's just as affected as I am. I smirk in victory when he grabs my hips to stop me, pulling me close and holding me still, so I can feel just how affected he really is. I moan quietly when he kisses the side of my neck, but since our food is cooking, he lets me go.

Since our meal is just about finished, I'm going to set the breakfast bar. I leave Christian to make the rest of the pancakes alone while I set everything up and get our drinks. He's asked for a coffee and I'm please to see he has my favorite brand of tea, even though I've not told him.

I giggle when I return to get our plates when I see Christian's pancakes looking nothing like a pancake. But at least he tried, and they're edible. Then I look at the last two he has on the pan and laugh harder.

"What?" He asks, playfully offended.

"It looks like boobs." I giggle again.

He has two so close together on the pan, they're touching, so they look like breasts.

"Really? I thought it looked like balls."

"Oh my god!" I screech when he adds a long shaft.

"I thought I could test your oral skills today." He says nonchalantly as he turns the burners off and sets everything aside to clean up later.

That made me stop laughing and instantly blush when I remember his oral skills.

"On the dick-cake or yours." I giggle as I lean over the breakfast bar to set our plates on the counter where we'll eat.

"On me, baby." I giggle again when he comes up behind me, wrapping his arms around my waist, kissing just behind my ear and nuzzling me. "We'll play after we've finished eating. I can't wait to take you again."

Excited for more Playroom fun, I begin to eat with Christian as soon as we are seated.

We talk and joke throughout our meal, even stealing bits of food from the others plate.

Where just about finished when Christian suddenly frowns, causing me to frown with him.

"Excuse me." He says as he puts his fork down and pulls out his phone.

I didn't even hear it ring, he must have it on vibrate.

"Grey." I listen to his one-sided conversation. "Of course, I'll be there." He sighs and rubs his face then looks at me and smirks. "I'll have a plus one. ... that's right. ... Yes, mother, a plus one." He rolls his eyes. "I'm sure you can't... You too, laters."

He ends the call.

"I thought you were monogamous?" I try to sound unaffected as I take a bite of my food.

He has a date, and tonight no less. It's the weekend. Our weekend. His words come back to me, _'I don't like to share'_ , Well, I don't think I like sharing him either.

"I am. You will do well to remember that. We're going to a charity event tonight. _Together._ "

"What?" _We?!_ "No." I shake my head.

"Yes." His voice is smooth yet Dominant.

"No, Christian. We agreed that no one would know. If we go to a public event _together_ surely everyone will know. You promised."

"I intend to keep that promise. It's my weekend, and I want you with me. No one will know it's you."

"How?" I roll my eyes.

"Anastasia," He's Dominant now. "I know we agreed to a power exchange only in the Playroom, but you will not roll your eyes at me again or I will take you across my knee." His Dominant voice is in warning and makes me squirm. "It's very disrespectful."

"I apologize, sir." I say sincerely and continue. "But surely you can see how this would not be a good idea. I think it's best if I stay here and wait for you to return or go back to my apartment and see you the weekend after next as scheduled."

"It's a masquerade theme, so we'll be wearing masks."

"That's not going to stop people from identifying me or asking you who I am. They will see a woman on your arm and want to know who she is. And you said your mother will be there. Surely she will want to know who her son has on his arm as well as all the other guests in attendance. Are you going to lie and say, 'oh this is Jane Doe'? And wouldn't that break our NDAs, if you tell them who I am? Christian, I'm flattered, really I am, but I think it's best I don't go. If you weren't my boss, maybe..."

I look at Christian through my lashes and he doesn't look pleased that I've turn down his offer to go with him.

"We'll arrive separately and you'll sit at a different table." He says like it's a done deal. "No one will know you're with me."

"I guess that would be fine," He's not going to take no for an answer. "but I have nothing to wear to something like that and there's no way I could afford anything expected of me with my salary. I really think it's best if I don't go."

"Anastasia." He says my name with humor. "Have you forgotten who I am? We agreed that I can buy you things to use in my company." I flush, because I thought he meant panties. "I'll call my mother, to let her know I don't have a plus one, but to add a business associate to a separate table, then I will call a personal shopper from Neiman's to arrange gowns to be sent over or we can go there for you to chose your gown."

"Okay." Is the only thing I can think of to say.

"I'll be a moment to arrange everything, then we can play."

"Okay." I repeat much more hoarse this time, excited.

He kisses my lips then leaves the kitchen, presumably going back to his study, to make these phone calls.

I get up and clean our breakfast mess, getting his immaculate kitchen back to it's original state.

I don't know what to do with myself and for some reason I'm in the mood to bake while I wait for Christian to tend to his business with the gala.

I look for the items I'll need to bake chocolate chip cookies and find that he has everything I need in his fully stocked fridge and pantry, everything except the chocolate chips. I guess I could bake a different kind of cookie, but I really want some chocolate chip cookies, so I'll need to go to the store.

I tap on Christian's office door and open it, peeking my head inside, to tell him I'll be back, but he's still engrossed with his phone calls. I don't want to disturb him with such a silly thing so I shut the door before he notices me and decide to leave a note instead, that way he will know where I went.

I go upstairs and grab my purse and walk back downstairs to the kitchen.

I get a piece of paper out of my mini note pad that I keep in my bag and a pen, write the note and leave it on the kitchen counter.

I call the elevator but nothing happens so I call it again, and again nothing happens.

"May I help you, Ms. Steele?" I jump, startled, and turn around to see Taylor, Christian's driver.

"Oh, I um." I blush wondering if this man knows what Christian and I have been up to. "I need to go to the market and the elevator isn't working."

"I see. Mr. Grey requested the elevator to be locked. Does he know you're leaving?"

"I left a note." I tell him. "Are you saying you'd hold me hostage if I wanted to leave and I didn't have your boss's permission to do so?"

"Of course not, ma'am." He says seriously and a bit uncomfortable.

Although I was joking, it's nice to know he wouldn't.

"I just need some chocolate chips from the market so I can bake some cookies." I explain the reason I'm leaving.

"I have some. Follow me, please."

I raise both of my eyebrows in surprise that _this_ man has chocolate chips on hand.

I follow him down a hallway behind the stairs.

He takes me to an apartment that looks similar to Christian's, though this room is on a smaller scale.

He leads me to the kitchen, again similar but smaller than Christian's.

A blonde woman is in the kitchen, washing dishes, and turns around when she hears us enter.

"Gail, this is Anastasia Steele, Mr. Grey's friend. Ms. Steele, this is Mr. Grey's house manager, Gail Jones." He introduces us in a clipped all business tone then looks through the pantry for the chocolate chips I need.

"It's lovely to meet you, Mrs. Jones." I tell her. She must of cooked the wonderful meal last night. "Your chicken and veggies last night were delicious, thank you."

"Oh." She seems surprised, though I'm not entirely sure why. "Thank you. And it's a pleasure to meet you too, Ms. Steele."

"Please, call me Ana."

"Ana." She smiles a warm friendly smile at me.

I like her already. I'm glad Christian has someone to take care of him during the week. With his cooking skills, he'd probably eat take out all week until a Submissive came on the weekends to feed him. I make a mental note to help Christian learn the basics of cooking at some point during our time together.

"Here you are, Ms. Steele." Taylor hands me a large bag of chocolate chips.

"Thank you, Taylor."

"Are you making cookies?" Mrs. Jones asks me.

"Yes, ma'am. I was craving them so I thought I would make some for Christian and I."

Now they both look surprised, Gail more so than Taylor. I suspect that's his military training, like my dad, to remain impassive. Maybe Taylor's not as surprised, but Gail definitely is. I notice her glance at Taylor and he gives her what looks like an _'I told you so'_ look.

"Well." Mrs. Jones clears her throat. "When I bake Mr. Grey chocolate chip cookies, I add a double batch of the chips. Mr. Grey loves chocolate."

"Thanks," I grin. "I'll do that."

 _Christian likes chocolate, huh._

"Anastasia?!" I turn around, hearing Christian shout my name from the main apartment.

When I turn back around, to face his staff, they look more professional, less warm and friendly, and if I'm not mistaken, Mrs. Jones looks a little sad. I frown confused and go to ask her if she's okay but I hear Christian again.

"Anastasia?! Taylor!" He shouts my name with what sounds like panic and Taylor's, in a controlled CEO type of way, is the best way I can describe the difference.

 _I wonder what's wrong?_

"I better go. Thanks for the tip and the chocolate chips." I tell Gail as Taylor has already left to see what his employer wants. "It was nice meeting you."

"Yes, dear, you too." She says rushed, like she's trying to hurry me along.

I smile kindly at her and walk back through what I presume to be the staff apartment when Christian appears in the door way, looking around the room frantically, until his eyes land on me. Taylor must have told Christian I was in here. I see Christian visually sag.

"There you are." He sounds relieved.

 _Didn't he read my note?_

"Yeah, I-"

I'm cut off before I can even begin, when he grabs me, my body flush with his, his hand in my hair, his other hand on my lower back, and his lips crashing onto mine. I wrap my hands around his neck as best as I can with the large bag of chocolate chips in my hand, but play with his soft hair on the nape of his neck as our tongues dance together. I realize this is the first time I have actually touched him. His hand moves from my lower back to my ass, roughly grabbing a handful. I feel my insides clench deliciously.

I hear a gasp, and flush when I realize we are making-out in full view of Gail, his house manager, in the entryway of her home.

I try to pull away, but he easily lifts me in his arms, so I wrap my legs around his waist and my hands around his neck as he carries me out of the staff's entryway and back into the main apartment.

"Where are we going?" I murmur against his mouth.

"Bedroom." Is all he says.

"I have chocolate chips." I let him know.

He backtracks to the kitchen, sitting me on a bar stool and takes the bag of sweet chips, tossing them onto the counter. They slide off and hit the floor with a gently thud. Then takes my bag from me, dropping it onto the breakfast bar. I gasp when he lifts my dress over my head and quickly takes it off, tossing it aside, then he unclasps my bra, throwing it somewhere unseen, and sucks greedily on my nipple.

"OH!" I arch my back, pushing my breasts towards him and thrusting my hands into his hair, pulling him to me.

My sex is already clenching deliciously and I'm so wet. He kisses my mound, up my sternum, my neck, my chin and back to my mouth. I move my hands from his hair, wanting to feel his hard, sexy chest and abs, knowing how muscular he must be under his clothing, but before my hands can meet their destination, I am thrown over his shoulder, like a caveman in heat. He carries me to his bedroom, smacking my ass along the way.

Just before he tosses me onto his bed, he rips my panties from my body. I keep my eyes on him, watching him climb onto the bed, settling between my legs. He reaches under my thighs, lifts them, pulling me roughly down towards him, and lays my thighs so they are resting on top of his, then he leans down on top of me, holding my hands again. _Ugh, that's so frustrating, I want to touch him! Oh, but his kisses._ He holds my hands in one of his and I hear his zipper being undone then feel his erection rubbing against my sex, to see if I'm ready for him, _I'm so ready_ , before he enters me.

"Oh, Christian."

He continues to pound into me at a punishing pace as he nibbles on my jaw. His stubble feels amazing against my skin. His ragged breathing, in my ear, is arousing, and matches mine. I meet him thrust for thrust until I combust in another mind-blowing orgasm.

 _Has sex ever been this good as it seems to be with Christian?_

Hours and multiple orgasms later, we are laying spent, exhausted, with my back to his front as he holds me, _finally_ cuddling after vanilla sex. I'm comfortable and sated as I lay basking in the afterglow of my many orgasms. It may have been just fucking, but it was incredible, per usual.

 **CPOV**

I'm laying in my bed as I hold the most beautiful girl in the world, that seems to be changing me, as she sleeps.

I can't believe the panic I felt when I couldn't find her. Never had I felt that before. My previous Submissives were given limited access to my apartment so it was easy enough to find them, however, sometimes I would have to look a little more than necessary and when I found them, they would be punished for the extra effort it took me to find them. With Anastasia, I felt relieved instead of the usual annoyance.

"I'm never going to let you go." I tell her sleeping form as I brush some of her hair away from her beautiful face.

I hear my phone buzz. I need to check it incase it's business. Reluctantly, I release my goddess and fish out my cell from the pocket of my jeans, that I finally took off after our first round of vanilla, then read my text when I see it's from my brother, Elliot.

 _ **You wanna head over to the rents together tonight? I'm dateless if you can believe that. -E**_

I laugh quietly at his text so I don't wake my sleeping beauty.

 **Can't. -C**

I don't elaborate.

 _ **You're going, aren't you? -E**_

 _ **Yes, but later than usual this year. -C**_

I'll be on time, but it's an excuse as to why I can't join Elliot.

 ** _Bullshit._** ** _Fine then I'm stopping by for lunch. Be there shortly. -E_**

 **I already ate. -C**

I lie, again, I haven't had lunch yet.

 _ **A beer then. I never see you anymore. -E**_

 **Busy. -C**

Okay, this is not so much a lie. I am laying naked in bed with Aphrodite herself right now.

 ** _I'm here. Elevator wont move, let me up, asshole. -E_**

"Fuck." I whisper and look at Anastasia.

She's still sleeping, hopefully she'll stay sleeping until I can get rid of Elliot.

I carefully peel myself away from my beauty and quickly get dressed, throwing on my jeans, without bothering with underwear, and grabbing a T-shirt.

I rush to the kitchen and grab Anastasia's dress and bag. I notice a paper on the counter so I grab that as well. It's a note from her saying she's going to the market for chocolate chips and will be back shortly to bake cookies. I laugh once. If I had saw this earlier, perhaps I wouldn't have been in such a panic, thinking she left me.

I shove the note in my pocket and carry her dress and bag with me to the security office.

"Mr. Grey," Taylor starts, standing as soon as I enter. "your brother is here, sir. You asked not to be disturbed, and the elevators are still locked, per your request."

"I know. Unlock the elevators and let him up. And keep this in here, for now." I set Anastasia's dress and bag on his desk.

"Yes, sir." Unfazed at the request.

"In five minutes come out and say I have..." I trail off thinking. "...a meeting or something I have to attend to."

"Yes, sir." He knows the drill.

I walk back out, glancing towards my bedroom, and stand in the entryway, waiting for Elliot to come up.

 _~DING~_

"Hey, Asshole! Long time no see!" Elliot bellows as he steps into the main room "It's been weeks."

"Will you keep your voice down?!" I hiss between my teeth in a low whisper, glancing towards my bedroom again.

"Why?" He continues to be loud.

"Just keep quiet. I have a headache." I lie smoothly as I walk towards the kitchen so we can grab the beers and get him the fuck out of here before Anastasia wakes from her nap and he sees her come out of my bedroom.

"You look different."

He can't see me, but I roll my eyes. It hasn't been that fucking long since we last saw each other.

"If I didn't know any better, I'd say you look well fucked." He laughs at his unknowingly accurate joke.

"Shit." I whisper when I see Anastasia's bra hanging on off a bar stool. I quickly grab it and hide it in front of me as I walk to the fridge.

Tossing her bra inside the crisper as I take out two beers, I can't help but smirk when I think of returning the bra to Anastasia and watching her nipples hardening from the coolness. It gives me ideas for a scene, perhaps involving ice. I try to control myself when I feel my dick harden at the thought of her naked, tied up, and me running ice all along her smooth sexy delicate body. I have to adjust myself before I turn around to face my brother.

"So why can't we go together tonight?" Elliot asks as I hand him his beer.

"I may arrive later than usual this year. I have some work that needs my attention and I have to get it done before I go." I lie smoothly as I take a pull of my beer, nearly chugging it. "Deadline and all."

"You work too much." He takes a small sip of his beer.

"Somebody has to do it."

Instead of sipping my beer, I chug it again. My bottle is now half gone while his doesn't look like it's been touched.

I can't help but to keep glancing towards my bedroom, hoping she wont come out. I did promise Anastasia no one would know about us, but surely family doesn't count. I know she's more worried about my employees/her co-workers.

I chuckle at this 'surely family doesn't count' bullshit. I have my Submissives sign NDAs so NO ONE will know of our involvement, family included, yet here I sit, saying family doesn't count. However, knowing Elliot, if he sees Anastasia, he'll give me shit for it or say something embarrassing, like me finally getting laid, for sure.

I have to get Elliot out of here. I'm not sure how long she will sleep for, but I know she will come out if she doesn't see me in there with her any longer. _Where the fuck is Taylor?!_ Hasn't it been five minutes yet, surely it's been longer than.

"Certainly not the CEO." Elliot brings me from my thoughts. "You could pay some fucker to do shit for you. I do."

"Not if I want it done right."

"What's with the bag of chocolate chips on the floor?" He chuckles as he bends down to grab them.

"Gail must have dropped them when she was putting away the groceries."

"I thought you gave her the weekends off?"

"I do. So why don't you have a date tonight?" I change the subject, as I make a show of drinking my beer so he will drink his a little faster.

"The struggle is real my friend."

I chuckle quietly, but he doesn't make a move to drink.

"Mr. Grey." Taylor calls my attention.

 _Finally!_ I bet that fucker waited exactly five fucking minutes.

I nod for him to continue.

"The conference call is ready for you, sir."

"Thank you, Taylor." I turn to Elliot, setting my beer bottle down on the breakfast bar. "I have to get this done so I can go to the gala at a decent hour. I'll see you tonight."

"Sure." He sets his full beer on the counter and walks towards the elevator.

Thank fuck he leaves without further prompting.

I walk back to my bedroom, once I've seen Elliot out, and arrive just in time to see the door open. My heart races, but not from almost being caught. Anastasia walks out of the room, wearing my T-shirt, looking SEXY as FUCK. I can't tell if she's wearing bottoms, but I know I destroyed her panties, so I hope not.

"Sorry, I fell asleep." She blushes that delicious shade.

"That's okay." I hold her hands so she wont touch me and kiss her.

"Have you been drinking?" She grins with a giggle, no doubt tasting the beer I had on my lips.

"I have." I admit. "Just one beer."

I kiss her again, deepening it this time. She moans as I slip my tongue inside, giving her a taste.

"We have to leave for Neiman's soon." I murmur against her lips. "We'll eat then leave, although, I am tempted to take you again." I let my eyes roam her tiny body in my shirt. "You make the simplest items look sexy as fuck, Anastasia."

She giggles, a beautiful girlish giggle, and I can't help but to kiss her once more.

"Get dress. We'll have lunch then go shopping."

I've taken Subs shopping before but never have I brought a Sub _with me_ to _any_ formal or informal event. I'm not sure why I insisted Anastasia join me at the gala tonight, with my family in attendance no less, but I'm thrilled she'll be there. After all, just last night I decided to let loose and give vanilla a chance. I'm enjoying vanilla. I want more vanilla. Now.

I walk her backwards through the doorway of my room, towards my bed, and enjoy vanilla once more before we leave.

 _ **~..~..~**_

 **APOV**

Christian drove us around town today. And let me tell you, that man behind the wheel of a sexy sleek sports car in total control, is totally swoon worthy.

I'm not sure if this is Christian's way of slowly bringing beauty and clothing into our arrangement, but I guess I did need a gown. Though surely the salon visit was a bit overboard. I could have done my own hair and makeup. Christian told me he usually takes his Submissives shopping, on an ad hoc basis, and he's a private partner in the salons. That's a little weird, him being involved in the beauty industry, but I let it go.

My gray gown is beautiful, strapless, and hugs my curves at just the right places, with what looks like sparkles covering the material. I even got Louboutin stilettos to match. I feel like a goddess.

After finding my gown for tonight, Christian left me to be pampered at a salon while he ran an errand.

I've had my hair washed, trimmed, and styled in an elegant up-do, my nails manicured and pedicured, my eyebrows plucked and an esthetician applied my make-up for tonight, all while enjoying a glass of Chardonnay. One could get used to this sort of treatment. Perhaps I should keep beauty in our arrangement. How could I complain with being treated like royalty?

I found out the errand Christian had was to buy me jewelry; expensive, beautiful diamond earrings.

Getting ready for tonight took the rest of the afternoon. I never got to make the chocolate chip cookies and we didn't go back into the Playroom.

Perhaps, another time.

Christian and I are getting ready separately. He said he had some business to tend to first.

I'm not sure if he's done with his business or if he's ready to leave, but I am, so I make my way downstairs.

It's quiet.

I check Christian's office first, knocking and peeking my head in, but it's dark and quiet in here.

I shut the door and venture towards his bedroom.

I knock and peek my head in, just like I did with his office door, but stop in my tracks when I see him.

He's already looking at me, I know, but I'm not looking at his face. Christian is standing, gloriously naked, in front of a chest of drawers, unashamed, so he shouldn't be with a body like that, holding a pair of his boxer briefs. When my eyes slowly make their way to his face he's impassive, but his eyes give him away. I notice his hair is damp so he must've just got out of the shower. I'd love to have showered with him.

"You look beautiful." He comments.

"You look naked." I respond, biting my lip, and giggling.

He chuckles then licks his lips. "I am naked."

"I am beautiful." I bite my lip again to prevent my smile at my cheeky statement.

"That you are."

Christian's eyes darken. I know that look.

"Come here." His voice is hoarse, husky.

"No."

"No?" He chuckles.

"We're already running late." I explain. He told me we didn't have long to get ready when we returned from shopping.

"Come here." He says again in his sexy Dom voice so I follow his instructions.

I closed the bedroom door, making sure it latches, and slowly make my way towards Christian. I'm surprised to see him put on his boxer briefs before I reach him. I thought he wanted sex. I try to hide my disappointment as I stand in front of him. The disappointment soon dies off when Christian puts his hands on my hips, slowly inching my gown up until it's bunched around my hips. My breathing has picked up. He keeps his eyes on me, and mine stay on his. He reaches under my dress to loop his fingers in my panties, slowly taking them off.

After he has them in his hand, he lowers my gown to his rightful position. The disappointment is back when he steps away from me. He takes a few steps towards his bed and picks up his trousers. He puts them on, then makes a show of putting my panties in his pocket.

"We may not be arriving together, and you may not be near me while we're there," He zips his pants, then grabs his dress shirt, putting it on as he continues. "but you better believe how hard I will get, every time I see you, knowing you are bare underneath that sexy dress of yours, Anastasia."

My cheeks are on fire when I realize what his intentions are.

I'm to go to this event, this public event, without wearing my panties.

 _ **~..~..~**_

I'm now in the back of an SUV with a man, who's name I don't remember, driving me to this charity event.

Christian and I are arriving separately so Taylor is driving Christian and another man is driving me as we follow Christian and Taylor to Bellevue where the event is taking place. Apparently at his parents home.

I put on my mask as the driver pulls into a long driveway that is lined with the soft glow of lanterns. I see Christian get out of his SUV in front of me, looking totally sexy in his tux, wearing a dark, mysterious solid black mask. I notice there are photographers at this event, and they take a few photos of Christian. He gives them all a curt nod, not stopping his sexy walk to speak with any of them.

When Taylor pulls away, my driver pulls up, and valet opens the rear passenger door for me. I take a deep calming breath, accept the helping hand, and get out. I'm not known, but my photo is taken, not as numerous as Christian though.

As I near to the end of the photographers, and to the event that is being held in the back yard of the house, I'm offered a glass of champagne by a passing waiter. I accept it graciously. There are people dressed to the nines wandering about, high society at it's finest. I see huge tents and a dance floor set up on the lawn near the Sound. I give people a polite smile as I make my way through the crowd.

I honestly don't know what I am doing or why he wanted me here.


	12. (12) Coping Together? Or Alone

**CPOV**

I feel terrible; I basically force Anastasia to attend the Coping Together gala, she doesn't know a soul, and we can't be together. In my defense, I didn't want her to go home or wait at my apartment for my return, as I've had previous Submissives do when I've had to attend an event. If this wasn't my parents charity event, I would have skipped it to be with her, alone in my apartment. I had fun this morning, making breakfast with her, and we haven't been in the Playroom but once, last night.

Tonight is our last night together this weekend. Since her roommate returns home tomorrow morning, and I wont be able to see Anastasia next weekend since it's not our scheduled weekend, I'll have to wait even longer to see her again. I'm not sure why I agreed to this every other weekend bullshit. Yes, I do actually; I wanted her. I _want_ her. As I've never wanted anyone or thing before.

 _Why else would I give up so much to be with her?_

She said we could play on our off weekends if she's not busy, but with her roommate home from her vacation, they will go out, I'm sure. I'm not pleased that she will be going out without me, where any man can put his hands on her, hit on her, look at what's mine, just as every man here tonight already has.

I have already been called out by Mia regarding the permanent scowl on my face as I watched Anastasia walk around the event earlier tonight, alone, and politely smile at her admires as she dismissed their advances. Perhaps it wasn't a good idea to take her panties. They probably smell her scent for miles. _Animals!_

 _Great! Now I have that fucking song stuck in my head_.

I considered having her wear a pair of my ben-wa balls, to make her needy for me, but now I'm glad I didn't. She's already beautiful, a flushed version of Aphrodite tonight; the Greek goddess of love, beauty, seduction, pleasure, and happiness. If she looked anymore arousing, I'd go to jail for killing every motherfucker here.

We've met each other's gazes a few times before we were asked to be seated for dinner. I smirk every time she blushes, and thrust my hand into my pocket to feel her panties there. Another reason I shouldn't have taken them, my dick is hard as fuck. I know I told her I would be, but that was just a front. Now I'm walking around this event with a raging hard-on like a fucking pubescent teenager. I've had to hide my erection in the waistband of my boxer briefs so it's less noticeable.

We're now finishing our meal, which means the auction is coming up soon, then Anastasia and I can leave. My family knows the drill, I never stay long for these things. It's a great cause, don't get me wrong, but it's also a reminder thrown in my face every year, and around my birthday no less.

I have had Anastasia within my sights throughout the dinner, as I have the entire evening. I try to act as if I am paying attention to the conversations going around my table, giving the occasional grunt or nod to let them know I am paying more attention than I actually am. Nobody suspects a thing, as this is my normal petulant behavior.

I'm pleased to see my mother sat my 'business associate' at the table with other CEOs, thinking my 'business associate' would be more comfortable at that table, however, they are all old men who want nothing more than arm candy and a good fuck while their wives are oblivious, happily spending their cash.

Anastasia looks beautiful, but miserably bored, surrounded by old men, their equally as old wives or their second, third, who knows how many fucking marriages those fuckers have had, but their brides are near Anastasia's age while the men are as old as my grandfather.

 _What was thinking bringing her here?_

Well, I know what I was thinking. I was thinking we could enjoy the evening together, but she foiled those plans, not wanting us to be seen together. Which if she were any other Sub, I wouldn't want to be seen with her, but for some reason, I don't care who knows Anastasia and I are together. In fact, I want them to know, everyone to know, she's mine.

I plan to leave the first chance we can, which is usually before the first dance auction, and pleasure her for my fuck up. Another first, I usually receive the pleasure and rarely pleasure my Submissives for my fuck ups. I've rewarded them, yes, but not for my mistakes.

Anastasia's blue eyes meet my grays from across the room.

'Sorry.' I mouth to her.

She smiles at me then continues to eat and converse with those around her.

I look down when I feel a hand on my thigh and see Elena's blood red manicured fingers inching closer and closer to my cock while she continues to converse with my mother like nothing's happening. She's done this before, many years earlier when I was her Submissive, jacked me off under the table to teach me control.

 _But is she fucking serious right now?!_

I grab her hand before she can get to my dick, squeezing it in warning, before I discreetly shove it away from me.

The auction has started now so it wont be long before we can leave. I watch Anastasia reading her auction card, and when the MC announces _Tess of the D'Urbervilles_ First Editions are next, her face discreetly lights up. If I blinked I would have missed it. I know she'd like them so I begin to bid on them for her and win them for $16,000. Her sweet smile tells me she knows exactly what I did and why I did it.

The auction continues until it's time for the first dance auction.

I'm about to get up, make my excuses, and leave with my girl, but Mia's excitement distracts me. She's participating in the first dance auction, as she does every year, however, she shocks the hell out of me when she rushes to Anastasia's table pulling her along.

 _What the fuck?!_ I was hoping to leave now.

Anastasia looks nervously at me and I nod discreetly once, letting her know it's fine. I know how persistent Mia can be after all.

"Aren't you leaving?" I hear Elena ask as she follows me and the crowd of gentlemen towards the stage.

"No." My response is curt, and screams leave me the fuck alone, but does she listen?

"Your new pet not satisfying your needs?" I can hear the joy in her tone as she gloats, so I glare at her.

"Not that it's any of your business, but everything is fine." I say in my Dom voice so she knows I'm serious. "I told you, I will contact you if need be. Until then..." I trail off, looking back at Anastasia.

"Why are you up here?"

I ignore her, pissed about her earlier attempts, and keep my gaze on Anastasia.

I hear a low growl of disapproval before she turns on her heel and storms off.

I roll my eyes and continue to pay attention to the first dance auction, waiting patiently for Anastasia's turn.

"Hey, bro." Elliot bumps his shoulder against mine. I fucking hate when he does that.

"Elliot." I greet him, keeping my eyes on my Anastasia, watching her like a hawk.

"What are you doing up here?"

"I wanted to dance with Mia." I lie smoothly.

I'm here to approve of Anastasia's first dance partner, and if worse comes to worse, I'll be forced to bid on her. _Forced?_

"Her first dance?"

"I haven't seen her in awhile and wanted to dance with her before I leave."

"Oh, cool."

It's finally Anastasia's turn. The MC begins to list the bullshit qualities she has, however, if he said she was into wizardry, I would believe him. I'm under her spell as she has completely bewitched me.

She looks nervously in my direction as her cheeks flush with color.

I know she's assuming I would bid on her, win her dance, and effectively reveal our involvement.

 _Don't worry, baby, I intend to keep our involvement confidential, as promised_.

Unless I need to step in. No fucker is dancing with my girl.

 _Fuck, I'm going to end up bidding on her._

Where are all the nerdy boys, that are usually drooling over the girls up for bid, because this is the only way they can have a beautiful girl wrapped in their arms? _Not my beautiful girl, but the other girls._ Fuck, I just know I'll end up bidding on her. She'll be pissed, but at least she'll be in my arms, and not some strange man's.

"Daaaammnnn. Check out the beauty up for bid."

I clench my jaw and fist my hands in my pockets to prevent me from hitting Elliot when he talks about Anastasia. My Anastasia.

"Oh, I gotta get me some of that."

I snap my head towards him, glaring.

"$5,000!" He grins with a wink towards Anastasia.

I'm about to out bid him, as well as every other fucker here, with an outrageous over the top bid that no one would or could possibly match, _what the fuck was I thinking letting some fucker dance with my girl_ , when Anastasia's look stops me in my tracks just as I open my mouth to bid. She looks to be begging me with her eyes. I can see she's worried about our little affair coming to light, if I win, so I reluctantly keep quiet.

If anyone is to dance with my girl, I guess there's no better than my brother, knowing she wont want him when she has me.

"Don't let her slip away from you, Lel." I grumble when he stops bidding at $10k

"Right. $12,000!"

 _"$12,000 going once, going twice... Sold."_

Elliot grins as he walks forward to claim _my_ prize, and walks away with her on his arm, smooth talking and laying his charm on Anastasia. Fuck, maybe Elliot wasn't the best chose. He's a fucking man-whore. I'm pleased when she doesn't look interested in his game.

I'm distracted with watching Anastasia and Elliot interact while I try to bid on Mia, but I obviously win my sister's first dance.

After the first dance auction has ended, we all step onto the dance floor.

"Christian, you know I love you right?" Mia asks me as we dance, a little closer to Anastasia and Elliot so I can keep an eye on them.

"Of course." I smile down at my little sister then look away again to watch my brother dance with my girl.

I try not to scowl when Elliot spins Anastasia further away, causing her to giggle.

"Ouch!"

"Sorry." I didn't realize I was squeezing Mia, holding her much too tight, when I see Anastasia enjoying herself without me.

"I love that you wanted to dance with me," Mia brings my attention back to her again.

"Mm-hm." I hum, keeping my gaze on Anastasia and Elliot.

Elliot seems more tame now. _I wonder why?_

"But did it have to be the first dance?"

"I'm leaving shortly, Mia, this was the only opportunity I had to dance with you tonight."

While dancing with Mia, Anastasia and I catch each others gaze from time to time, giving each other shy smiles.

"You look happy." Mia comments. "More so than earlier tonight. Actually, more than I've ever seen you."

"I am happy." I realize how true that statement would actually be if it was Anastasia in my arms that said that to me, but I am happy.

"Why?" She inquires, searching my face, like I have some huge secret to tell.

"Because I'm dancing with you." I give her my cheesy lame answer.

She pouts like that wasn't the answer she wanted to hear.

I give her a small smile then look towards Anastasia and Elliot again. They're speaking amicably now.

"You should stay for the fireworks at least," Mia calls for my attention again. "You never stay long." She pouts trying to persuade me to stay.

"Not tonight, Mia." _I have plans._

I continue to dance with Mia, but it's not long until the song ends.

"Thank you for the dance."

"Well, you did pay for it."

"Goodnight, Mia." I kiss her cheek.

"Laters." She gives me Elliot's usual farewell and skips away happily.

I smile and walk away so I can take my girl home and finally play with her.

I frown when I see Elliot on his own, well, speaking with our father, but he's not with Anastasia any longer. When look passed him, I see Anastasia walking away, in the opposite direction of the SUV. _Where is she going?_ I follow her and grab her hand to stop her.

"Anastasia, where are you going? We can leave now."

"I just have to use the ladies room before we go." She tells me sweetly, pointing over her shoulder at the portable restrooms. "I'll be right out."

"Okay."

I watch her walk inside the luxury portable restrooms, my mother rents for events, and stand to the side while I wait.

"Chris-tian!" I turn around when I hear Mia enunciate my name with excitement.

I chuckle at my bubbly sister and walk towards her to find out what she wants.

She bounces up to me excitedly, and the only other way I can describe it is Mia.

"Mia, we just spoke, what could possibly be so important?"

"Mom just mentioned you called her earlier, saying you were bringing a plus one." She grins, searching my face again for that secret.

"I also told mother, that was for Ros." I lie smoothly. "Gwen wasn't home so I invited Ros to tag along, but she changed her mind at the last minute."

"Oh." She seems let down and disappointed now.

 _Why?_

"It's just that, you've been acting a little differently tonight, and I thought you finally found someone."

I didn't think I was acting any differently, okay, noticeably different.

"Someone?"

"You know." _No I don't know_. "Someone you think about no matter what you're doing, someone you want to spend every waking moment with, someone who makes your heartbeat pick up when they enter the room and gives you a million tiny butterflies when they smile at you. Someone."

When she tells me this, the only person I can think of is Anastasia Steele. She makes me feel like this. Anastasia makes me feel things I've never experienced before. She has this uncanny ability to make me... feel. And it's terrifying. Every little thing that she does... I feel.

Her beautiful smile lights up my day. Her girlish giggle distracts me. The way she bites her bottom lip when she's deep in thought or turned on is arousing. She's so incredibly sexy that I have to stop and stare to make sure she's real. I enjoy talking with her, actual talking, being the one to make her smile, laugh. My heartbeat picks up when she's near or when she's in the elevator coming up to my apartment. I'm excited when I know she's coming. Don't even get me started at my out of control dick when she's in my thoughts or near. When I touch her, there's this warm fuzzy tingling sensation.

For many years I have had walls up around me that my own family have not and could not break through, and yet, Anastasia Steele has.

 _Anastasia. What is she doing to me?_

"You're getting old, Christian." Before I can think too much of it, Mia continues. "Don't you want a family?"

"I'm not that old, Mia." _What does my age have to do with anything?_ "And I have a family."

"Not us, silly." She laughs. "I mean a wife... kids... a dog in the yard of your home, barking at squirrels."

"Honestly, Mia, I don't think that's for me. I don't like dogs barking. It's a nuisance."

"Christian, stop teasing."

"I'm serious, Mia, that's just not the life for someone like me."

"Well, maybe if you stop working so much." She insists. "And put yourself out there."

"I'm good."

"Don't let the fear of striking out keep you from playing the game." She exclaims encouragingly. "You'll find someone."

"What?"

I'm confused. I thought we were talking about hearts and flowers? Now she's talking about baseball? Mia doesn't like baseball.

"I saw it on a movie." She shrugs and I laugh at her.

"I'm going to head home." I brace myself, knowing she will hug me.

"Alright, don't be a stranger." She hugs me quickly, like only Mia can do, and I kiss her cheek for the last time tonight.

I turn around, and walk back towards the restrooms, looking for Anastasia.

She's not out yet.

I wonder what is taking her so long, I hope everything is alright.

I knock on the main door, but receive no answer. I look around and push the door open to enter, but stop when another guest comes to use the facilities.

"Excuse me, ma'am." I stop her. "Could you tell me if a young brunette is in there?"

"Sure."

She's in and out in a flash.

"There's nobody in here, sir."

"You're sure."

"Positive."

"Thank you."

I look around the yard, trying to find her. Perhaps she's waiting for me at her table.

When I arrive, I see her clutch is missing.

 _Hmmm. She's obviously ready to leave._

I pull out my phone to call her, but she doesn't answer, so I call Taylor. He'll know.

 _"Yes, Mr. Grey."_ Taylor answers on the first ring.

"Where is she?" He knows who I'm asking about.

 _"Sitting on the front steps, sir."_

I end the call and walk to the front of my parents home.

 _Why wouldn't she tell me she would wait for me there? Why wouldn't she just wait near the restrooms when she was finished?_

When I arrive in the front of my parents house, I see her sitting on their front steps in her beautiful gown with her arms wrapped around herself as she waits for me. I didn't realize it was that cold, but she _is_ wearing a strapless gown. I'll have to give her my jacket and warm her.

"Anastasia." She closes her eyes when she hears me. "There you are. What are you doing up here? Are you ready to go?"

"Leave me alone." Her voice is eerily quiet and full of emotion, confusing me.

"What? Why?" I step closer to her, taking off my mask, and that's when I see she's been crying. "What's wrong?"

"Oh god, Christian." She wipes her eyes as she stands.

I think she's going to tell me why she's crying, what happened to her, but then she shocks the hell out of me.

"You have some nerve." She glares at me.

 _Me?_

"Baby, what-"

"Don't you dare 'baby' me, Christian Grey." I've never heard Anastasia this upset before, she's nearly growling at me.

"Anastasia, I don't know what the fuck is going on." I use my Dom voice because I really don't know what she's going on about, and it's making me angry. I get that she doesn't want me to use the term of endearment, I've never used one on a Sub before, but she's being very cryptic.

She looks like she's going to tell me off but then looks down the driveway.

I follow her gaze and see a black sports car driving up to the house. The event is still going on, but dinner and auctions are already over, it's only dancing and fireworks left, so I'm not sure why this latecomer has even bothered to show up.

My temper goes through the roof when I see her _ex_ step out of the car.

"You ready, Anastasia?"

I am now fucking furious when he walks around, to the passenger side, and opens the door for her.

"What the fuck are you doing here, Garrett." My voice is menacing as I stand tall and Dominant. "This is a private event."

"I'm here to pick up Anastasia, Grey." He answers nonchalantly in a laid back cool and casual tone.

 _WHAT?!_

 _She called him?!_

Anastasia walks down the front steps, right passed me, ignoring my glare, and to his car.

 _Is she fucking serious right now?!_

"Anastasia." I call for her just before she enters his car.

 _What the fuck is going on?!_

Thankfully she stops before she gets into his car, however, she still wont look at me.

"Anastasia, talk to me." I drop my Dominance. "I don't want to lose you."

She makes a noise of disbelief.

"I was never yours, or rather you were never mine, were you."

"What do you mean?"

"We're through." She gets into the car, not looking at me.

 _NO!_

Garrett shuts her door and practically skips around his car to get in himself.

 _What the fuck just happened?!_

I look down trying to think of what could have happened, to cause her to say those words to me, to leave with Garrett, but I come up empty. I shake my head and watch as the car drives away with her inside. I feel someone standing behind me.

"Get the car." I growl, knowing it's Taylor, as I glare at Garrett's retreating sports car. "Now."

"Yes, sir."

As soon as we're in the SUV, I order Taylor to follow her as I remove my bowtie and unbutton a few buttons.

We're a few cars behind them the whole way to her apartment.

I jump out as soon as we arrive, without waiting for Taylor to stop completely, seeing him walk her to her door.

"Do you want me to come up, Anastasia?"

"N-" She begins.

"No, she fucking does not!" I roar before she can answer and push him away from her.

"Christian!" I hear Anastasia shout at me, chastising, but I pay her no mind.

"What the fuck, Grey?!"

"Stay the fuck away from her, Garrett."

"She's my friend."

"She's mine!" I correct him.

"Not any more." He smirks.

 _Fucker!_

I step up to him and he to me. Dominant vs. Dominant.

"Will you two stop it?!" Anastasia stands between us.

She stretches out her arms to stop us from killing one another. Her hand is flat on Garrett's chest, but I back up and stand far enough away so she can't reach me. It may have been Dominant vs. Dominant, but it's Submissive takes the control.

"You two need to stop." She looks at Garret first. "Chad, you're not helping by antagonizing Christian. Thank you for the ride, but I'm home now, so you can leave."

She looks at me and that's when I see her eyes are red and puffy from crying.

 _What the fuck happened?!_

"Christian, you just need to leave."

"Why?!"

"Because we're done." Her voice stern and final.

She reaches up to remove the diamond earrings I bought her then hands them to me.

"I'll send your dress back tomorrow."

"Ana." I choke out. "No."

"I never... I never want to see you again." She whispers like she's in pain as a tear escapes, falling slowly down her cheek before she can wipe it away.

"Why?" I croak as her words cut me.

"Go. Home." She may not be a Dominant but her adorable glare tells me she's serious.

"No." I choke out.

"Then stay outside all night, I don't fucking care what you do." She quickly turns around to walk to her apartment door, but I grab her hand, stopping her.

"Anastasia, wait. I don't know what's going on, will you please tell me?"

"Monogamous relationships my ass." She snatches her hand from my hold and enters her building before I can say anything more.

I'm even more confused than before.

 _What the fuck is she talking about? We are monogamous._

"Looks like you fucked up, Grey." I hear Garrett gloat.

I _fucked up?!_

I turn my head to kill Garrett with my glare.

 _I thought that fucker left already?!_

I have to control myself from physically killing him when he smirks, putting his hands into his pockets, as he struts to his car and drives away.

I don't know what the fuck happened, but at least she didn't invite him up.

After he's gone, I walk up to Anastasia's building and buzz her apartment, but she doesn't answer. I call her cell and she still doesn't answer.

 _What the fuck just happened?!_


	13. (13) Mia Grey

**APOV**

As I use the facilities I think about my night at this charity event.

Although I didn't spend much time with Christian tonight, I did enjoy myself a bit, if I'm to be honest. It's quite the experience.

The conversation going around my table was out of my element, but I met a sweet bubbly girl named Mia, and she convinced me to help with the auctions. I agreed, not knowing she meant _participating_ in a dance auction.

Even though Christian and I are keeping our relationship anonymous, I hoped he would bid on my first dance. I had no way of telling him to bid on me, so I just looked at him in hopes that he would see my need for him to save me, but he didn't. I ended up dancing with a nice man named Elliot.

Elliot was funny and nice, and I actually had fun dancing with him. Just like every man here tonight, Elliot tried to lay on his charm, but I explained I'm not interested. He was polite about it, with no hard feelings, and stopped flirting only to be friendly. I'm glad he wasn't weird about being turned down, and we ended up talking about the Seattle Mariners while we danced. I don't know much about the sport, but my father likes baseball, so I was able to follow along easily enough.

Since Christian didn't bid on my first dance, I didn't think he would bid at all, but he did. And when he did, I became jealous. I'm not sure why he danced with another girl, and that girl was Mia, but I was dancing with another man so I had no right to be upset. I just can't fathom why he would bid on another woman, though. I didn't know it was a first dance action when I agreed, but surely he knew what he was getting into.

I would have liked to of danced with Christian tonight. We're wearing masks, I'm not in this high class society, so no one would know who I am or our involvement, and we didn't arrive together. It's only a dance after all, and it would have been so magical to dance with him, but as I pointed out, guests would probably question us. That's probably why he didn't bid on my first dance.

 _I wonder if they are questioning who Mia is?_

I tried to keep my eye on Christian and Mia while dancing, but with Elliot leading our dance, he would twirl me away every time we were near them. I did, however, catch Christian's gaze from time to time ,while he was with Mia and I was with Elliot. I had to stop looking at him, though because it was then that I remembered I was without my panties! Instead I engaged Elliot with talk of sports, an easy topic for any jock to follow passionately, anything to take my mind off my panties being in my Dom's pocket.

It's my own fault, us not being together here tonight, not wanting people to know of our involvement. I mean, he's my boss. But Christian's the one who insisted on a Non-Disclosure Agreement, so you would think he would feel the same way.

Christian did say he has been doing this Dom/Sub thing for years. He probably brought Subs to events before and bids on other women so his Subs aren't questioned. He said his own family doesn't know about it, though, also saying his family thinks he's gay. He said his mother would be in attendance tonight, yet he just bid on and danced with a girl, so surely they have to know he's not gay, right?

I'm probably overthinking again, as usual.

I've finished my business and am now washing my hands when a lady enters the luxury portable restrooms. She's looks to be about 30s or 40s, though I can't tell for sure with her mask on, covering her face and hair completely, although I do think I notice a hint of brown hair through the mask she's wearing.

"I adore your mask." I tell her as I dry my hands. "It's so unique."

"Thank you, darling. That dress becomes you."

"Thank you." I smile politely. "Have a good night."

I start to leave the restroom, so that Christian and I can leave the event.

"Do you know Christian Grey?" She blurts out before I leave.

"What?" I try to act as if his name means nothing to me as I turn around at the door, before I open it, to exit the luxury restroom.

"Christian Grey." She repeats his name.

"I don't think anyone really _knows_ him but everyone at least knows _of_ him." I can't believe how smooth I am, I've never been a good liar.

"I guess you're right."

"Why do you ask?" I ask her as I step away from the door, not leaving just yet.

I can't help but to be curious of why she's asking me, of all people, if I know him.

"I couldn't help but notice you speaking with him earlier."

I've only spoken to Christian right before I came in here to use the bathroom, and it wasn't a very long conversation. I didn't think anyone saw us, and even if they did, they wouldn't suspect anything. No one was near enough to hear us say we were leaving together.

"Oh?" I try to sound surprised. "I didn't know it was him, with everyone wearing masks and all." I try to play it off, but my smoothness from seconds ago is now gone. "I simply asked where the restrooms were." Surely that's a logical excuse to be speaking with thee Christian Grey.

"You should know he's in a committed relationship and it's pretty serious. I believe she's here tonight."

"How do you know?" I ask her, thinking she's talking about Christian and my relationship, though we're not serious at all, and we have stayed away from each other all evening so I'm unsure how she knew we were together. And wouldn't she know she's talking to his... well, me.

"I know his significant other." _She what?_ I'm so confused. "I'm only telling you this because I know what kind of man Christian Grey is."

"I'm sorry, I don't think I follow."

 _Does she know he's a Dominant? Is that what she's trying to tell me?_

"The man is a player, darling." She explains. "While his significant other is away, during the weekends, he fornicates."

 _'I don't do the girlfriend thing.'_ His words come back to me.

"He's married?!" I blurt out.

It can't be true. _It can't!_

"I know, it's shocking. I just thought you should know and I wanted to warn you because, well, because I was once in your shoes."

"What do you mean?"

"He seduced me." She says like it's obvious. "It wasn't very hard, a man with looks like that as rich as he is can surely have any woman he wants, and he chose me. I was completely beguiled, flattered that he would look my way at all. I went to his apartment every weekend to play, if you know what I mean. He wouldn't allow me to come on the weekday, you see, until one day I decided to surprise him during the week and she was there."

I gasp. She went to his apartment to play? _She's an ex-Submissive?_ I'm glad she's telling me this, but if she was an ex-Submissive of Christian's, she's breaking her NDA. Well, if he had her sign an NDA. I'm sure he did. He had me sign one before he would talk to me. Christian's a very well known man, he... wait,

"Wouldn't it be made public?"

I need to Google Christian. I still know very little about this man. This man I only met in person not even a few days ago, and online a week before that.

 _How long have I known him?_

"Oh, Christian Grey is a very private man, darling. He wouldn't let it be known. How else do you think he's able to fool around on the side?"

"Then how do you know it to be true?"

"She told me when I arrived at his penthouse, of course."

I feel my hand touching my mouth. _I've been having an affair with a married man?!_ I think I'm going to be sick.

I need to speak with Christian. I _have_ to speak with Christian!

"Please, excuse me."

"Of course."

I rush out of the portable restrooms and try to find Christian.

He was going to bring me here as his date tonight. _He told his mother for goodness sake!_ No, he only told his mother he had a plus one, he didn't even specify if it was male or female, business or pleasure. He didn't say 'I'll have a date', he said 'I'll have a plus one'.

I stop dead in my tracks when I see him.

He's laughing and smiling a wide gorgeous smile at a girl with raven hair. She turns her head, giving me a glimpse of her masked covered face and it's then that I realize, he's speaking with Mia, the bubbly girl who convinced me to participate in the first dance auction. The girl who he danced with.

 _Is she his wife?_ Is that why he bid for _her_ first dance?

The lady in the restroom said his wife was here.

 _Did she show up unannounced?_ She must have, because Christian wanted me on his arm tonight. I bet he's thankful I wasn't now.

I watch them interact for awhile, shaking my head.

I don't believe it.

"Excuse me." I stop a passerby. "Could you tell me Mia's last name?" I point her out.

 _Please don't say Grey._

"Yes, that's Mia Grey."

"Thank you." _For confirming my worst fear is true_. Christian _is_ married.

I can't believe it.

I wont believe it.

Not until I hear it from Christian.

I start to march towards them, determined to get to the bottom of this, but I am once again stopped in my tracks when I see her hug him.

I'm not allowed to touch him. He said touching was a hard limit. She's clearly touching him.

When he leans down to kiss her, I quickly turn around before their lips can touch, not wanting to see more.

I feel my heart breaking as tears escape my eyes unbidden and unwelcomed. I've never felt this before and I'm unsure why I'm feeling it now. I didn't even cry over leaving Chad. And Chad and I had a romantic relationship, not just Dom/Sub, and I knew him longer than I have Christian.

I can't stay here a minute longer, I have to leave.

I quickly make my way to my table to grab my clutch, and that's when I remember, Mia _Grey_ was sitting next to her husband at the Grey table.

"I'm so _stupid_."

I take off my mask, throwing it angrily onto the table, and quickly wipe my tears, that wont stop falling.

Christian had a driver drive me here. How am I going to leave? I could call a cab but Christian would follow me.

I call the one person I can think of, the only person I know _in_ Seattle, Chad. He'll help me if Christian wont let me leave.

 _"Hello, Anastasia."_ He answers on the second ring.

"Chad." I try to sound calm, however, I sound anything but. "Can you pick me up?"

 _"Sure, sweetheart, where are you? What's wrong?"_

"Please, just come get me. I'm in Bellevue." I sniff and give him the address.

 _"I'm on my way. I'll be there as soon as I can."_

"Thank you." I hang up and dash away more tears that have fallen.

Now to avoid Christian until Chad arrives.

I should talk to him, in front of Mia no less, so he's caught. But I don't want to cause a scene here.

I walk around the house so I can wait for Chad out front. The media that was here earlier in the evening, long gone.

As I sit on the front steps of this mansion they call a home, I have so many unanswered questions in my mind.

 _We would chat online at night._

 _Was his wife sleeping in their bed while he was patrolling BDSM sites?  
_

 _Does she know about the locked Playroom in their apartment?_

 _Is that why it's locked, so she wont go in there?_

 _Why else lock a room in an apartment you live in 'alone'?_

 _Is this why he wont let me touch him? Because only she can._

 _Is that why he wont let me sleep with him? Because it's her bed._

 _Is this why his staff seemed surprised and sad at our relationship?_

 _Is this why he doesn't do the girlfriend thing? Because he has a wife?!_

Good thing I found out now before we went too far with this.

Yesterday was our first day of our first official weekend together.

I wonder what he would say to me since his wife returned home sooner than planned. Would he tell me something came up with work, and needed to attend to that instead of me and our weekend together, so he could be with her? Perhaps Escala is just his kinky playground, and they have a home together, so we wouldn't know of each other. She would go home, and I would be at his secret love nest.

God, and I thought him being my boss was the deal breaker. Being married takes the cake. I was able to overlook him being the CEO of the company I work for, but no way can I turn the other cheek when he has a wife! What if they have children?!

I hold myself as I cry over the loss of someone I never had, who was never mine, and I realize, this is not the first time I've cried over Christian Grey.

 _What is he doing to me?_

"Anastasia." I hear his deep sexy voice and squeeze my eyes tight as my traitorous body instantly reacts to him. "There you are. What are you doing up here? Are you ready to go?"

 _Am I ready to go? Where's his wife? What did he tell her? That he's working late at the office tonight?_

"Leave me alone." My voice is eerily quiet and so full of emotion.

"What? Why?" He steps closer to me, taking off his mask. "What's wrong?"

"Oh god, Christian." I wipe my eyes as I stand. "You have some nerve." _The Bastard!_

"Baby, what-"

"Don't you dare 'baby' me, Christian Grey."

 _How dare he?!_

"Anastasia, I don't know what the fuck is going on." His voice now Dominant and less gentle.

I'm about to tell him _exactly_ what's wrong, but I look down the driveway when I hear a car and see Chad pull up.

"You ready, Anastasia?" Chad asks me as he steps out of his car, walking around to the passenger side, to open the door for me.

"What the fuck are you doing here, Garrett." Christian growls, standing tall, sexy, and Dominant. "This is a private event."

"I'm here to pick up Anastasia, Grey."

I roll my eyes at the two of them, and their never ending pissing contest, as I walk down the front steps of the house, passed Christian, and to Chad's car.

"Anastasia." Christian calls for me just before I get into Chad's car, still Dominant.

I stop with my hand on top of the open car door, waiting for him to continue without looking at him, because if I do, I know I'll break down right here, right now, and I have to stay strong.

"Anastasia, talk to me." He drops his Dominance sounding as he did earlier today when he couldn't find me in his apartment. "I don't want to lose you."

 _Is he kidding me right now?!_

"I was never yours, or rather you were never mine, were you?"

"What do you mean?"

"We're through." I can barely say the words, as I climb inside Chad's car, not looking at Christian.

Chad shuts my door and walks around to get in.

"So what happened?" He asks as he drives.

"Just take me home." I murmur not answering him, leaning my head back against the seat, and closing my eyes, hoping I will wake from what seems like a really bad dream.

 _...too dumb to realize_  
 _That I should've bought you flowers_  
 _And held your hand_  
 _Should've gave you all my hours_  
 _When I had the chance_  
 _Take you to every party_  
 _'Cause all you wanted to do was dance_  
 _Now my baby's dancing_  
 _But she's dancing with another man..._

"Chad." I say his name in warning when I hear him turn on the _Bruno Mars_ song ~ _When I was your man_. "Turn it off."

"What?" He feigns innocence. "It's a good song."

 _..My pride, my ego, my needs, and my selfish ways_  
 _Caused a good strong woman like you to walk out my life..._

"Please." _I can't deal with this right now_. "Just turn it off."

I pinch my the bridge of my nose and turn away from him as I cry. That's all it takes for him to turn it off.

It's quiet the rest of the way to my apartment, with the exception of my sniffles.

I just want to fall onto my bed and cry my heart out.

 _Non-emotional sexual relationship, my ass!_

He's done this for years. How was he able to not feel anything? I just want this day to be over already.

The chaos doesn't end though, as Christian has followed me home.

After dealing with Christian, I went straight to my room, curling up on my bed, not bothering to change from my gown and cried.

I finally let it all out and cry hard, thinking of the moments we shared, only this morning.

It's amazing how different a day can turn from good to bad in a matter of seconds.

I feel a weird pain in my chest while I cry.

 _Great, first I find out that Christian is a cheater and I'm a homewrecker, now I have heartburn!_

I ignore the heartburn, I ignore the intercom, I ignore my cell, I ignore that pain.

I ignore everything but my tears.

* * *

 **APOV**

I feel like shit as I wait at Sea-Tac for Kate's plane to arrive, looking like an extra for The Walking Dead, because I didn't get any sleep. But how could I, with the constant intercom buzzing, cellphone vibrating, and crying all night.

The Kavanaghs took the first flight out of Barbados so unfortunately for me, that means I had to be at Sea-Tac at 5 in the morning and after the night I had, all I want to do is lay in bed... and cry. I had to drive Kate's car here since I left mine at Escala.

"Ana?!"

I look up from where I'm sitting, waiting for Kate, to see a lot of blonde.

I smile as best as I can when I see my best friend, Katherine Kavanagh, and her family.

Before I'm even standing completely I'm wrapped in a tight hug.

"Hi, Kate."

"I missed you. You look..." She pulls back, still smiling, to examine me at arms length, then frowns. "Different." She says like it's a bad thing, no doubt seeing my zombie state.

"Gee, thanks, Kate. I missed you too."

"Sorry, I should have just had my parents drop me off. I know it's early."

"I told you it's fine. You know I'm not a morning person, is all." I lie.

"Well, you look great." She tries again, giving me another hug.

I am hugged and greeted by all the Kavanagh's as well.

"Are you ready, Kate?"

"Yeah, let's go."

"I had to bring your car, do you want to drive?" I ask her as we walk out of the airport.

"Ugh, no, could you."

"Sure."

Kate puts her bags in the trunk of her Mercedes with Ethan's help then the two of us get in and I drive us home.

"Your phone is going off." Kate tells me. I have my phone resting in her car's cupholder. "Want me to answer it for you?"

"Who is it?" I ask wary of who would call me. It better not be Christian again.

"It says Chad."

"Yeah, that's fine. Put it on speaker."

Since I'm driving, Kate holds my phone and puts it on speaker phone so I can talk.

"Hello." I answer the call when Kate connects.

 _"Hey, sweetheart. I just wanted to see how you were doing. You know, after last night."_

"I'm... fine."

 _"You don't sound fine. You didn't look fine when I left."_

"Chad, thank you for picking me up last night, but I'll be fine. I have Kate with me and I'm driving so I'll call you later, okay?" I really don't want to talk about last night in front of Kate. I can already tell she's itching for the scoop.

 _"Alright. Let me know if you want me to kick his ass for you."_

"That wont be necessary. Bye."

 _"Goodbye, Anastasia."_

"What was that about?" Kate asks as soon as she hangs up.

"Noth-"

"Oh, wait, you have another call. It says Christian. Who's Christian?"

"Don't-" I start to tell Kate not to answer but she already has.

 _"Anastasia?!"_ He sounds hopeful that I answered his call.

I grab the phone from Kate while I'm driving and end the call.

"Who's Christian?" She asks again.

"Someone I do _not_ want to speak with."

"He sounds fucking hot! Did you hear his voice? Swoon!" Kate dramatically puts the back of her hand on her head and leans back.

I giggle at her playfulness. It feels good to giggle.

"So what's going on?" Kate is in full reporter mood now.

I decide to give Kate a few details of what's been happening.

"Well, you know I broke up with Chad."

"Yeah, but you never mentioned why."

"It just didn't work out." Kate doesn't know about the BDSM. "We're too incompatible."

"Yeah, I could see that. I mean he's totally dreamy, with his Channing Tatum meets Chad Michael Murray looks, but there's just something about him."

"Well, we decided to stay friends. Anyway, I kind of met someone else."

"You minx!" She playfully hits me. "One minute you're a virgin and the next you're fighting them off with a stick. Where'd you meet this one?"

"Online."

"Online? Ana, that's dangerous."

"I know. Trust me."

I remember how terrified I felt when Christian found out where I was the night we were emailing when I was with Chad, and then at his apartment when I found out _he_ was the person I was chatting with, and ran from him, only to turn around and begin a BDSM sexual relationship with a married man. He may not have been a sick psycho pervert serial killer, but he could have been, and he's married.

"But that didn't work out either." I tell Kate sadly.

"Is he Christian?"

I nod, unable to speak because I know I may start crying again, and I don't want to cry in front of Kate.

"I need to get my car, I left it at Christian's." I say after awhile when we're almost home when I remember.

"That's fine. Are you okay?" She asks concerned.

"I don't know." I tell her honestly.

I drive us to Escala, so I can get my car.

"Your Christian lives here?!" Kate squeals when enter the access code for the underground garage.

I ignore her, but it hurts to hear her call him mine when he was never mine.

I pull into an empty parking space next to the penthouse parking spots.

All the penthouse spots are full with Christian's cars, so I can't park in any of the penthouse spaces provided, which leaves my car a little further away than I'd like. _Does he really need so many cars?!_ This can only mean he's home. I hope he doesn't come down here.

"I'll see you at home." I tell her once I'm parked.

"What happened to the car Garrett gave you?" I see her looking at all the cars in the parking garage, probably trying to determine which is mine, and since the last car I had when she was home was Chad's, she's presumably looking for his and not finding it.

"It was his, so I gave it back when we broke up and bought a different car with the money he got from Wanda." I explain.

"Oh, okay, I'll see you at home."

Kate and I hug then I get out. She climbs over to drive her car back home while I walk to mine.

Kate has already drove away when the elevator chimes, announcing it's arrival. I look up, and rush towards my car, when I see Christian step off.

"Anastasia." He rushes towards me.

I roll my eyes at his Dom voice and sprint to my car.

"Leave me alone, Christian!"

"Anastasia, will you just fucking talk to me?!"

"No." I finally make it to my car and quickly unlock the door. "I have nothing to say to you."

I get my door open, but he shuts it with a slam. The sound echoes in the enclosed underground garage of Escala.

"I don't even know what the fuck happen!"

I try to open my door again, but he's much too strong as he holds it shut, so I'm forced to give up. He puts his hands on my car on either side of my body, boxing me in. I'm sandwiched between my car and him, there's no way I can open my door now. He's so close, I can feel his body heat, but I don't dare turn around to look at him.

"Everything was going so well, and then out of no-fucking-where, you're upset, leaving with Garrett, and I don't even fucking know why! You wont fucking talk to me! Why, Anastasia? Tell me why? I at least deserve to know why you've ended this."

"Are you kidding me right now?"

I finally turn around to face him with my back against my car. He still has his hands on either side of me.

He's Dominant, and his beautiful gray eyes are searching my face.

Everything was going well because he forgot to mention one little thing _. He's married!_

"I know, Christian. Okay? I found out about your secret."

 _And I wont be his dirty little secret any longer._

"What secret?" He backs away and looks panicked that I found out he's married.

I notice his jaw clenching and his eyes darken, looking sexy as fuck, when I huff and roll my eyes.

 _Don't react to him, Anastasia Rose!_

I'm furious, both at him and me. I'm so upset that he lied to me and he's cheating on such a sweet girl, and I'm upset that even after I know this, I'm still attracted to him and my traitorous body still responds to him like it's his, when it never was.

"You're right, we should end it now." He doesn't sound so convinced, and it hurts to hear him say this, but I'm not having an affair with him, a married man. "You _should_ steer clear of me, Anastasia, I'm not the man for you."

 _Right, because he's Mia's man_.

"Goodbye, Christian." I'm finally able to open my car door, since he's no longer blocking me. I'm trying so hard not to be emotional right now. I have to think of Mia, his wife. That will keep me strong and determined. "Say hello to Mia for me."

He looks confused, probably at how I found out.

I get in my car, and wait for him to move without looking at him, so I can drive away.

I notice he takes a defeated step back in my peripheral vision, so I'm finally able to drive away.

Pulling out of Escala's underground parking garage, I drive a block away and park, to cry my heart out. Again.

 _Why does this hurt so much?_

* * *

 **A/N: _Obviously they learn the truth of what happened._**


	14. (14) Hearing Is Not Listening

**APOV**

It's been a long and depressing week. I've been stuck in a pattern of sleeping, working, and crying, a miserable 6 day cycle. That is longer than my relationship with Christian, be that as it may, I'm still not over him. We discussed our BDSM contract on Tuesday, began our Dom/Sub relationship on Friday, and ended things Saturday. That's not very long at all, yet there was something about him, about the way he made me feel, and I find myself missing him still.

I realize I should, but I can't find myself enough courage to look him up online, because I know it will show pictures of him, and I don't want to hurt anymore than I already am. _Seeing his beautiful face will surely make this pain worse_. It's bad enough that I have to see Christian at work, but I haven't spoken to him. He's his usual impassive self, it's obviously not affecting him as much as it is me. I guess as long as he has his wife, he's fine.

However, I think he's still trying to talk to me, because I see this look in his eye when I catch his gaze, even though I'm trying not to make eye contact with him, and he tries to approach me. But I wont let him convince me this is okay, so I run to the bathroom at work when I see him coming. I know it's a coward and immature move, but I can't, I just can't see him, talk to him, have anything to do with him, because I know how easy it will be for him to talk me into staying with him. So I've been avoiding him at all costs, especially when his wife came to _Grey House_ to have lunch with him.

I don't know anything about his wife expect that she's a sweet and bubbly girl. I've only spoke to her for maybe five minutes at the charity event, long enough for her to ask me to help with the action, but I so badly want to tell her about her husband's infidelity. I was tempted when she was leaving _Grey House_ as I was coming back from my lunch. I'm just afraid she wont believe me or will forgive him. That's usually how it works. The other woman is seen as a homewrecker whether she knew he was married or not, and the wife forgives her cheating husband, especially if he's wealthy and well known.

If Mia ever finds out what a cheating asshole her husband truly is, I hope she didn't sign a prenup and takes him for everything he's worth, the bastard! He doesn't even wear his ring! It's been 6 days and I'm still so pissed off about this. How could he do this to Mia?

 _How could he do this to me?_

"I'm monogamous in my relationships, Ana," I impersonate Christian's deep tone of voice. "You'll do well to remember that. .. Asshole."

He's not so monogamous himself, is he. It said in the contract the Submissive is to be monogamous, nowhere did it say the Dominant had to be.

"Ana," I hear Kate through the bathroom door along with a rapid tapping. "I wanted to talk to you before you leave."

 _Shit, I hope she didn't hear me_.

I'm getting ready for work, and have just gotten out of the shower. I've already dried and styled my hair, while wearing my towel. I'm just drying myself off a little more than necessary while I suffer with never ending thoughts of Christian. It's like he was a drug and I need another hit, but the addiction is bad for me so I had to quite. No matter how long you're away, you still want it.

"Okay," I call back, trying not to sound upset, as I apply my lotion. "I'll be right out."

I get dressed in a pencil skirt, button up blouse, and heels then walk out, ready for work.

"What's up?" I ask her as I fill my travel mug with hot water to get it ready for my tea.

"I met this guy, and I wanna hang out with him tonight."

"Okay."

Kate and I were going to have a girls night out tonight. We've been hanging out at our apartment all week since she's been home, due to us both having our careers now, so we wanted to go out tonight, well, Kate did. I'll just stay home and enjoy my pit of self-pity party with ice cream, movies, _anything but romance, not that Christian and I even had a romance_ , and maybe even a bottle of wine.

"I don't want to leave you alone when you're going through a break-up, so I asked him to bring a friend."

"Why?"

"For you, silly. We're going to double."

"Kate," I whine like a toddler. "I want don't to."

"Come on, Steele." She's a second away from getting on her knees, begging me. "I've always wanted to double date with you. We were going to when you and Garrett were together, but I wasn't dating anyone at the time. I was planning to when I came home from Barbados, if I found someone, but I return, and you not only broke up with him, but another guy too." She pouts dramatically giving me her best puppy dog eyes.

"Kate..." I _really_ don't want to go out, _especially_ with a man.

"Listen, I've had my fair share of break-ups. The only way to get over it is to wear comfy jammies, eat a bunch of ice cream, and put yourself out there again. Come out with me tonight, and when we come home we'll do the pajama, movie, ice cream thing together."

"I'd rather not. I'd rather go to the shelter, and pick out a litter of kittens, to get my starter kit for the crazy cat lady I'm destined to be."

"Sweetie." Kate whines. "I hate seeing you like this."

When I broke up with Chad it didn't hurt like this, and I don't even know why it hurts this much when I barely knew Christian. Kate does have more experience than I do so perhaps the way to get him off my mind is to put myself out there again. I really don't want to, I really want him, but he's spoken for.

"I know this is the first time you've put yourself out there in all your 21 years, but not every man is like Chad or this Christian guy, I promise, and the only way to get over them is to have fun. Come with me tonight, and forget about those guys."

 _There's only one guy I want to forget about; Christian Grey._

"Who knows, maybe you'll meet your prince charming." Kate continues, grinning like the Cheshire cat.

"I'm not looking to find love, Kate."

"You can't find love, Steele, love finds you, that's why they call it _falling_ in love. You don't force yourself to fall, you just do. It's like tripping. You never know when it's going to happen."

"The only problem with falling is you can get hurt."

"Not if you have someone to catch you." She reasons.

 _Not if he's married._ My subconscious counters, taunting me.

 _What the hell, Kate's right. The only way to get over Christian is to move on._

"What's his name?" I give in.

Kate squeals and grins as she claps and jumps around.

"Elliot."

Elliot was the name of the guy I danced with at the charity event I went to with Christian. Is it too much to ask that I _not_ be affected by every little thing associated with Christian. Well, at least his name isn't Christian.

"What's your date's name?" I ask her. Hopefully, it wont be Taylor.

"Oh, sorry, Elliot's mine. You're getting paired with his friend Josh. They're both in construction so you know they are super hot."

"Okay, Kate. I have to get to work. I'll see you tonight." I grab my travel mug, and start to walk towards my bag.

"I'll pick out your outfit, because we're going to the Mile High club."

"Mile High?" I whisper as I slowly pick up my bag.

Another thing associated with Christian. _He owns the freaking place!_

"Yeah, it's a really exclusive place, with a night club on one floor and a restaurant on another, but Elliot's getting us in. I've always wanted to go there."

"Kate, can we go somewhere else?"

"Why?"

I can't tell her that Christian owns it, she may know he's thee Christian Grey and I did sign his NDA.

"I just don't want to go there."

"Well, okay, but where can we go last minute?"

"We can go to Garrett's." I suggest. "I can call Chad to get us reservations."

"It wont be weird for you, going on a date to your ex's restaurant?"

"We've agreed to be friends." I remind her.

"Does he know that?"

"Yes." I can't help the annoyance that slips through. "I have to go, I'll call Chad."

"Yeah, okay, see ya tonight."

I go outside and call Chad as I walk to my car.

 _"Good morning, Anastasia."_ He answers on the second ring just as I get into my car.

"Hi, morning. Hey, um, Kate wants to go on a double date tonight, can we do it at your restaurant?"

 _"Yeah, sure, you want me to pick you up?"_

"Oh, um, no. Kate and I are doubling with these guys Kate knows."

 _"Oh, sorry, I thought you meant with me."_ He chuckles, brushing it off like it's nothing. _"So you and Grey worked it out then? That's good."_

"So you can get us a table?" I ignore his question about Christian and I.

 _"Yeah, sure, I'll hook you guys up. What time?"_

"7?"

 _"Sure. No problem, Anastasia."_

"Great, thanks. I have to get to work."

 _"Hey!"_ He calls my attention through the phone before I can hang up.

"Yeah?"

 _"You okay?"_

"I'll be fine. I have to go."

 _"Alright. Talk to ya later."_

As I drive I take a sip of my hot water and realize I totally forgot to grab and add my tea bag.

 _Ugh, this is not my day!_

I drive to _Grey House_ and park in the underground parking, then walk to the elevator.

I enter the elevator as soon as the doors open, and turn around, to push the button for the publishing floor.

My heart races as I see Christian, jogging to catch the elevator.

"Hold the elevator!"

I push the door close button rapidly and thank goodness they close before he makes it.

I jump back, holding the wall, when I hear a loud bang on the doors before the elevator moves. I assume he's hit the doors. Maybe I should consider looking for another job, since I'm stuck in the same building as my married ex-Dom whom I can't seem to get over.

While I'm in the elevator, as I have every day this week, I try not to look at the spot Christian and I shared a passionate kiss.

When the elevator arrives at the publishing floor, I walk off as calmly as I can, and to my desk to begin working.

"Ana," Martha, the editor I assist, comes out of her office. "I just got off the phone with higher up. We have a meeting with the CEO just before lunch. Can you gather everything we have on the new authors we've acquired since we've been at GP?"

"Sure." I squeak.

Somehow I think this meeting is going to be more about me than the new authors.

I need pull myself together so I have enough strength to not only face him, but be in the same room as him, knowing he will try to find a way for us to be alone.

 _Why is he doing this? Why can't he just leave me alone?_

 _ **~..~..~**_

 **CPOV**

I've had a horrible week thus far, the worse I've ever experience, and I've had my fair share of worse weeks.

I've been miserable without Anastasia. I want to talk to her and explain myself, I don't even know how she found out about why I have only brunette Submissives, but every time she sees me at _Grey House_ , she runs into the lady's room before I can reach her. I can see the disgusted look on her face and it eats away at me, knowing that she sees me as the fucked up sadist I am.

But I want her. I need her. I have to have her back.

Elliot tried to get me to go out with him tonight on a double date, but there's no fucking way I'm going to put up with some chick falling all over my dick while I distract her and Elliot fucks her friend. I don't know why he even bothers to ask me to join him when I turn him down every time.

The only highlight of my week was Mia's surprise lunch visit. I didn't mention Anastasia's 'hello' as Mia would of known that I know Anastasia. I'm not sure why Anastasia even asked me to say anything to Mia. I know they spoke at the charity event on Saturday, because Mia convinced Anastasia to participate in the first dance auction, but why would she tell me to tell her anything

I've avoided Flynn because I don't need his psychobabble bullshit.

I've considered leaving Anastasia alone and even called Elena to set up another Submissive, but that didn't work out.

 _~FLASHBACK~_

"Christian, darling, what a surprise."

 _"Hello, Elena." I greet her, then stay quiet._

"To what do I owe the pleasure of this phone call?" _She asks after while of my silence_.

 _"I-" I pause. "I just wanted to know how the salons were doing."_

"Darling, I gave you the reports not too long ago, you know they're doing well. The next report isn't schedule until next month, and we have a lunch date scheduled next week. Now, are you going to tell me what's the reason for your call? I'm lead to assume you want something from me." _I can tell by her tone she's smiling._

 _Elena could always see through my bullshit._

Do I tell her Anastasia left me? Do I ask her to find me a new Sub?

 _When I think about having a relationship with another Sub, I know I can't go through with it. I don't understand why I feel this way, Subs have left me before and I've known them longer, much longer, than Anastasia. Yet, Anastasia Steele is the only one I want._

 _"This was a mistake." I hang up, tossing my phone onto my desk and rubbing my face with my hand._

 _~END OF FLASHBACK~_

I climb out of my Audi SUV, with Taylor in tow, and make my way towards the elevator of _Grey House's_ underground parking garage.

When I look up I see her and her sexy ass swaying gently, taunting me, about to enter the elevator.

I jog to catch up to her. She'll be forced to talk to me in the elevator and I can hit the emergency stop so she'll be forced to hear me out.

"Hold the elevator!" I call out as I see them start to close.

She pushes a button, but it's presumably the door close button because they continue to shut.

I run faster to catch them but don't arrive in time.

"Fuck!" I hit the closed elevator doors.

I punch the call button and the elevator next to the one she used opens.

After Taylor and I board, I leave him to push the button for the 20th floor.

I'm the fucking CEO, she's my employee, if I want to see her, I fucking will.

I email Andrea to set up a meeting with Grey Publishing's top editors, knowing that Anastasia works for a senior editor, and make it mandatory for their assistants to attend. After I send the email I notice a text from my brother.

 _ **Wont be needing Mile High reservations tonight, thanks. -E**_

 **Why? She find out you're a man-whore & run. -C**

I can't help but add my own turmoil in my text to Elliot. Anastasia ran from me when she found out I'm a sadist. I message Elliot to distract myself, as I walk to my office, passing Andrea's desk. She sees the look on my face & knows it's going to be one of those days.

Elliot responds just as I sit behind my desk.

 _ **Nah, nothing like that.  
We're doubling & her friend wasn't comfortable with the Mile High for some reason.  
So we're going to Garrett's Bar & Grill instead. -E**_

"Garrett." I growl, squeezing my phone almost to the point of breakage.

 _ **~..~..~**_

When it's time for the meeting, I make my way to the conference room on my floor. I used to meet with department heads on their floors, but I got sick and fucking tired of seeing all the female employees fawning over me, drooling, when hordes of them would rush out of the lady's looking fresh faced with a few buttons undone to capture my attention. I haven't had anyone capture my attention the way Anastasia Steele has, and I don't even fucking understand why. I barely know her and she me.

 _Well, she knows a whole lot more about me now, but how?_

I'm usually the last one in the meeting, I wait for no one, and today is no exception.

When I walk in and unbutton my suit jacket to take my seat, I look around the table to find those beautiful beguiling blue eyes of my girl, but I don't see her. I told Andrea not to let anyone sit in the seat to my right, saving it for Anastasia so I can sit next to her, and that is the chair that is empty.

 _Fuck, what if she quit?!_

"Is everyone present and ready?" I ask, hoping they say we're waiting for another member of their editing team.

"Mr. Grey," A gentlemen at the other end of the table begins cautiously. "I apologize, sir, but Mrs. Miller and her assistant, Ms. Steele, are running a bit behind this morning. The meeting was last minute, sir." He explains. "We can start without them, if you'd like."

I hadn't even realize her editor wasn't here as well.

"No, we'll wait." Fuck, I sound desperate and relieved. But the purpose of this meeting is so I can talk to Anastasia, I could give a fuck how GP is doing.

"Yes, sir."

It takes her a good three minutes to walk in, three minutes that felt as if it was three hours, looking like she's lost five fucking pounds since I last saw her Saturday evening. Sure I saw her at _Grey House_ here and there all week and just this morning, but it was from a distance.

She keeps her gaze off of me as she walks behind her editor, who is stammering out an apology for their tardiness, but I'm not listening.

When Anastasia sees where they are to sit, she quickly yet discreetly rushes in front of her editor to grab the chair furthest from me. I stare at her, almost to the point of glaring. _Okay I am glaring, sue me._ I wanted her to sit next to me, she's lost weight, and she wont fucking look at me.

 _She knows what kind of monster you are, Grey_.

"Mr. Grey." The same gentlemen from earlier calls my attention.

"What?" I reluctantly take my eyes off Anastasia to speak to him.

"Shall we begin, sir?"

"One moment."

I pull out my phone and dial Andrea.

 _"Yes, sir?"_

"Order lunch for the meeting. Sandwiches are fine."

 _"Yes, Mr. Grey."_

I hang up and place my phone back into my pocket.

"The meeting may last through lunch." I explain smoothly. I know it wont, but I need to know she's eating, so now it will.

The meeting begins with each editor telling me about the new authors they have acquired since they've been with GEH, while Andrea and the intern Olivia serves lunch.

From years of training, I've learned to focus, so I'm able to listen throughout the meeting even though I'm distracted. I'm quite surprised with how well the publishing department is doing, but it pisses me off further when Anastasia picks at her food, barely eating, and continues to avoid looking at me throughout the meeting as she takes notes for her editor.

She doesn't look at me, but she does constantly glance at my hands, like she's looking for something. It bothers me so much that I find myself looking at my own hands.

With the meeting nearing the end, I wrap it up so I can finally speak with Anastasia privately.

Before I dismiss them, I stand, buttoning my suit jacket as I walk to the door.

"Thank you for your time." I excuse them, holding the door open, and they all stand to leave.

I'm sure Anastasia knows exactly what I'm doing because instead of following the others, she walks all the way around the table so she's further away from me, trying to slip passed me to exit the room. That doesn't stop me from reaching across the person she's trying to use as a human shield, and grab her arm, pulling her toward me.

"I'd like a word, Ms. Steele."

She rolls her eyes, and waits next to me with her arms crossed until the conference room is empty. My palm is twitching, I so badly want to spank and fuck her on this conference table, but now is not the time. Even though we've... broken up... I still want her. I've never went back to a Submissive after we've ended things, but the way Anastasia and I ended doesn't feel right.

I'm about to speak, but before I can I hear someone behind me.

"Mr. Grey." I turn around when I hear Anastasia's editor. "Did you wish to speak to me as well? It's my fault we were running late, sir, I had to-"

"No, Mrs. Miller, that wont be necessary." I interrupt her. "I only need to speak with Ms. Steele, pertaining to a different work related matter. As for your tardiness, don't let it happen again."

I close the door and turn to face Anastasia so we can finally talk about this, hopefully move passed it, and be together again.

"This better be about business."

"Excuse me?" I stand in front of her, tall and Dominant, trying not to smirk at her smart mouth that I've missed so much, however, now is not the time so it's easy to stay impassive, unaffected.

"If you're not going to scold me for being late to the meeting, then I suggest you let me leave, _sir_." She fucking purrs, knowing what that does to me.

I close my eyes tight as I feel my dick harden and try to control him, although, I never seem to have any control of him or myself around her.

 _Why her?_

"Anastasia," I open my eyes to look at her.

She's staring at the button of my shirt, instead of a my eyes, with her arms still wrapped protectively around her body.

"I want to explain." I start, but I don't now where to begin.

 _Do I ask her how she found out? Can I? Because I'd really like to fucking know, as not many do_.

"Oh, this should be good." I stow my twitching palm yet again, when she rolls her eyes a second time.

"I'm attracted to brunettes." I start again, running my hand through my hair, unsure of what or how much she actually knows, struggling with what to tell her. How to explain myself so she will accept it and want to be with me again.

"That's why you do it?" She asks upset. "Because your wife isn't a brunette? That's your excuse? You're not attracted to her?"

I cock my head to the side when she says... Did she just say... _My wife?_

"Anastasia, I don't know-"

"Why did you marry her if you weren't attracted to her? Was it an arranged marriage or something? Do you think it's okay to have affairs if-"

"What?" I interrupt her. "What are you talking about?"

"I know, okay. I know you're married. So you can stop with the act."

"Why would you think I'm married?"

"I saw you." Her tone is accusatory.

"With who?" This will be easier to clear up than me being a sadist. "Who is it you think I'm married to?"

"Mia." She stresses _Mia's_ name like it's evident _she_ is my wife.

"Mia?!" I feel my brows rise in shock. _She thinks Mia is my wife?!_ "Mia and I are-"

"Let me guess, getting a divorce? That's a very stereotypical thing to say, Chr, I apologize, Mr. Grey." She corrects herself from saying my given name, and I don't like it, not one bit. She's only ever called me Christian, outside of the Playroom, the only Sub I allowed to.

"Mia is my-"

"I know, she's your wife."

"Anastasia, I'm not-"

"Can you just leave me alone? I'm trying to get over you."

"Will you let me fucking talk!" I bark at her, mainly from being interrupted, but her not wanting to be with me because she wrongfully believes I'm married for whatever reason is ridiculous, especially to Mia, my sister for fucks sake. "I need to explain."

"Please, Christian," I can hear the emotion pouring from her when her voice cracks. "I've cried so much already. I don't want to cry anymore, especially not at work."

"Oh, baby, no." I try to reach for her but she pulls away from me before I'm able to touch her, hold her.

"Please." She so quiet, like she's trying not to cry. "Just let me go."

"Ana, baby, listen to me. Please. Let me explain, without interrupting me." She's quietly holding herself, dashing the tears from her eyes that threaten to fall. I want to hold her, but since she wont let me, I continue. "I don't know why you think Mia is my wife, but she's not. She's my sister. I'm not married."

"Funny, you look nothing alike."

"We're adopted." I explain.

"Great, can I go now."

 _Fuck, she doesn't believe me_.

"No. I can't let you go. Anastasia, why would I take you to an event that my so-called wife would be at? I told my mother for fuck's sake that I would have a plus one. Do you really think I would bring my mistress to an event with my mother in attendance? You have to believe me."

"I have to believe you?" She says like it's the most ridiculous thing. "You've been keeping things from me since we started talking."

I do have a track record of keeping information from her. _'A liar will not be believed even when he tells the truth.'_ I've never lied to her, but omission or lie, they're the same thing. One lie is enough to question all truths. And now she doesn't believe me. It's my own fucking fault.

"Anastasia, I may have kept things from you, but I've never-"

Suddenly I'm cut off from the door opening and my intern, Olivia, standing there, face ashen at my glare.

"You're fired!" I roar at the intern for disrupting me.

She quickly recedes from the room in tears, shutting the door as she goes. _I don't give a fuck_. I turn back to Anastasia so I can explain myself, but start to panic when she rolls her eyes and walks towards the door.

"Anastasia!" I panic, rushing towards her before she can open the door.

"Stop!" She shouts, quickly turning around and pulling her hand back that I was reaching for before I can touch her. "I'm leaving. I have to get back to work, Mr. Grey, and I don't want your employees and my coworkers to know we were involved. Just stay away from me." She squeaks, trying to stay strong, but is on the verge of tears.

"Anastasia, you're not even listening to me!"

"You're right, I'm not. Goodbye, Christian." Anastasia leaves before I can say anything more.

"Anastasia." I breathe, just letting her walk away.

Maybe it's better to let her go now instead of months later when she finds out what kind of monster I really am. It's inevitable to happen. She deserves someone that can love her, marry her, have babies with her, with their dog barking in the yard of their home at the squirrels. Just the thought of her with anyone else is like a knife twisting in my dark nonexistent heart, but I'm unable, inadequate to fulfill that role. Surely it will be harder to let her go months later, if we continue this, than it is now, so I should just let her go. I'm no good for her, she deserves better than me, Dominant or otherwise.

It doesn't stop this unknown pain in my chest that I've had since she left me nearly a week ago.

I fall to my knees when she walks away and out of my life.

I'm weak, broken, as I sit on my knees with my head bowed... Submissive.

 _What the fuck has she done to me?_

 **APOV**

 _Oh, that's a good one, saying his wife is his sister, and that they are adopted._ I know what I saw, and he's been omitting things since we met. And just because his mother would be there, doesn't mean he would tell her we've been fucking! We weren't in a romantic relationship, so what the fuck would he have told his mother, _'Hey mom, this is my sex slave.'_ because it surely wouldn't be, _'Hey mom, this is my girlfriend.'._

"Goodbye, Christian."

I leave, stopping him from saying anymore bullshit.

He's such a liar, and he's a good manipulator. I wont let him fool me again.

"Anastasia." I hear him whisper almost as if he's in pain.

I walk out without looking back, as hard as it is, surprised at how strong I am being, but I know if I see him I will falter and I need to stay strong.

I walk towards the elevator and push the call button, waiting for it to arrive.

"Excuse me, Ms. Steele." I turn around hearing a familiar voice and see Taylor, Christian's driver.

"What is it?" I ask, holding myself as I wait for the elevator.

He clears his throat to begin. "Forgive me for speaking out of turn, ma'am, but I couldn't help but overhear the conversation that took place in the conference room."

 _How?_ I know Christian and I weren't that loud. _Shit, maybe we were_.

"There are cameras, ma'am. Only myself and Mr. Grey have access to the feed." He explains my unasked question when I frown. "I would like to speak with you about the matter. Hopefully I can help resolve this misunderstanding."

"He pays you." _Why would I believe anything his employee says?_

"Yes, ma'am, but he couldn't pay me enough to lie to you about this. May I speak with you about the matter in private?"

He looks over his shoulder, and I follow his gaze, seeing the few people strolling around the 20th floor.

"I really have to get back to work." I say when the elevator doors open. I've stayed up here long enough, talking with Christian.

"Perhaps, we can speak after you've finished?" He suggests.

"I get off at 5." I agree to speak with him. _After all, who knows you better than your personal staff. They're like flies on the wall._

"Yes, ma'am, that's fine."

"Okay. I'll see you then."

I get into the elevator and push the button for the publishing floor.

"He's a good man, Ms. Steele." Is the last thing I hear before the doors close.

 _He's a good man? He's a good man that cheats on his wife and his staff is okay with it?!_

 _ **~..~..~**_

When I returned to the publishing floor, I was so busy throughout the day that ended up staying until after 6 o'clock with no time to talk to Taylor since I have to get home and get ready for my double date with Kate, Elliot, and Josh; Kate's new beau's friend. We're supposed to meet the guys at the restaurant at 7 o'clock so I have to hurry home. I left a note with GEH's front receptionist to tell Taylor I will speak with him first thing Monday morning.

I rush home, Kate nagging me as soon as I come through the door about being over an hour late, since I was supposed to be home around 5 instead of after 6. I tried telling her I was fine and didn't need to go, but she wouldn't let me back out, saying it was rude to cancel on the guy at the last minute after I already agreed.

I'm running around our apartment like a chicken with it's head cut off, so I can get ready in time for dinner, dressing in a pair of skin tight jeans, one of Kate's sexy tank top shirts and heels. Kate makes quick work of my hair and makeup, then we're out the door in record time.

We get into her car together and drive to Garrett's Bar & Grill.

I tell the hostess our reservation since I had Chad make them. She lets us know our party is waiting then she shows us to our table.

Kate and I follow her to the table, and when I see Elliot, it's confirmed he's the man I danced with last weekend at the charity event, but his friend, Josh, is not here yet. Elliot stands when he sees us approach the table.

"Ana?" He asks surprised to see me.

"Hi, Elliot."

"How 'bout them Mariners?" He chuckles.

I giggle with him, remembering we talked about baseball as we danced.

Kate and I join Elliot, sitting at the VIP table. He has manners, I see, as he hold Kate's chair for her to sit.

"So how do you two know each other?" Kate looks between Elliot and I suspiciously.

I haven't mentioned to Kate anything about the charity event or any details regarding Christian.

"We met at a charity event. I won Ana's first dance in auction."

"What?!" Kate shouts in the otherwise quiet restaurant, and looks at me with wide surprised eyes. "You went to a charity event, and you didn't tell me?!"

"I forgot to mention it." I flush as other patrons of the restaurant look in our direction. "I'll tell you about it later, Kate."

"Don't think we wont talk about this, Steele." Kate says much more calm, but still curious as ever.

"So where's Josh?" I ask Elliot, hoping to avoid anymore curious questions from Kate.

"Bad news," Elliot looks between Kate and I. "Josh couldn't make it."

"Oh no." Kate says, looking more let down than I do.

I so badly want to throw her _'it's rude to back out last minute'_ in her face, but I don't.

"It's okay, I can just go home." I'll take Kate's car. I'm sure Elliot can give her a ride. Pun intended. "You two enjoy your evening."

"Oh, I got my brother to replace him." Elliot interjects, before I can stand or leave. "He'll be here soon."

"Your brother?" Kate seems surprised and excited at the same time.

 _Why?_

"Yeah, he usually never wants to hang out but he changed his mind for some reason." Elliot checks his phone. "Oh, good. He's here."

I watch the door for a blonde god to enter, but get the shock of my life when Christian Grey walks in, looking like said Greek God.

"There he is." Elliot gets up and much to my horror, shakes hands with Christian freaking Grey! "Glad you could make it, bro."

 _Bro?!_ They must be friends. But they seem total opposites _._

"I wouldn't miss it." Christian says looking directly at me, and only at me, impassive but gray eyes glowing.

"So, this is Kate." Elliot begins introductions.

"Katherine Kavanagh." Kate stands to shake Christian's hand, sounding professional and polite. "It's a pleasure to meet thee Christian Grey. I tried to get an interview with you my Senior year at WSU as you're a major benefactor for the university, however, your PR department wouldn't grant an interview."

Of course Kate would know who he is. _Am I the only one that didn't?_

"You as well, Ms. Kavanagh." Christian is formal and polite as ever. "I don't often grant interviews; that would be why my PR team wouldn't allow it, however, if I had known, I would have considered it. I admire tenacity."

"Christian, you're not conducting business, it's a date, her name is Kate." Elliot chuckles then turns to me. "And this is Kate's friend, Ana... Sorry, Kate didn't tell me your last name and I only remember exchanging first names on Saturday."

"It's Steele." I tell Elliot as I stand with everyone else. Kate called me Steele in front of him just seconds ago, but he probably thought it was a nickname or something. "Anastasia Steele."

I don't move to shake Christian's hand, but he grabs my hand anyway, bringing it to his lips. I feel the familiar tingling sensation that is always present when we touch. I try not to be affected by him, but my body reacts to him instinctively.

"It's a pleasure, Anastasia." He breathes in a husky tone of voice, my name rolling off his tongue, with his eyes locked with mine.

"Kate." I pull my hand away from Christian. "May I speak with you privately please?"

I don't wait for her to answer I just push her along to the restrooms.

"Ana, can you believe your date is thee Christian freaking Grey?! It sucks that his first name is the same as your ex, though."

"Yeah..." _And his last name too_. "Can you believe he's going on a date when he's married?!" I mimic her tone.

"What are you talking about? Christian Grey isn't married. In fact he's rumored to be gay. Which sucks for you, sorry."

"He's not gay." _I know_. "He's married."

"How do you know he's not gay and what makes you think he's married? .. And why didn't you tell me you met Elliot before tonight? Actually. Why didn't you say you went to a charity event? How did you even know about it? Or, no offense, Steele, but how could you afford it? What has been going on while I've been on vacation?!"

"I-" can't tell Kate, Christian Grey took me to the event.

"I-" can't tell Kate, I know Christian's not gay because we had sex.

"I-" can't tell Kate, I know Christian is married because I went to the charity event with him and saw his wife there.

"I didn't know your Elliot was the Elliot I met." I decided to say, hoping she doesn't continue with interrogating me about my knowledge of Christian Grey, but that's wishful thinking since we're talking about Katherine Kavanagh here.

"And how do you know Christian is not gay?" She's persistent as ever. "What makes you think he's married?"

"I read it online?" Surely that's a plausible reason, if only I didn't say that like a question.

"Really?" She doesn't believe me.

 _Gosh, I'm such a terrible liar_.

"Mm-hm." I squeak.

Kate takes out her phone from her back pocket and moves her thumbs like crazy as she types.

"It says he's single. Seattle's billionaire bachelor, Christian Grey."

"Well, obviously it's not known to the public."

"You said you saw it online."

"Right." _Shit!_

"Show me the article." She hands me her phone, calling my bluff.

"Um." I bite my lip. "Okay."

I look through Kate's phone, knowing there wont be anything that says Christian is married, but I do see a photo of his wife.

"This is his wife." I show her.

"That's his sister!" She says like it's the most obvious thing.

"What?" I breathe, feeling the blood drain from my body.

 _No!_

"Mia Grey." Again being obvious. "That's Christian Grey's sister. Elliot's too. Everyone knows that."

"But they don't look alike."

"That's because they're adopted, Ana." She rolls her eyes, taking her phone back.

 _Adopted? He was telling the truth!_

"Oh my god." I mumble under my breath, but Kate doesn't hear me, either that or she's too busy with her phone.

 _He was telling the truth!_

"See," She holds up her phone to show me an article about Christian, saying he was adopted at age four to Mr. Carrick Grey and Dr. Grace Trevelyan-Grey.

I gasp, covering my mouth then rush out of the restroom, without Kate, to go to our table.

"Everything okay?" Elliot stands when he sees me.

"May I speak with you?" I ignore Elliot and grab Christian's hand, who also stood upon my arrival, showing his manners.

I pull him, knowing he's much stronger than I am, but thankfully he comes with me willingly.

"Ana?" Kate finally joins me, reaching the table just as I'm pulling Christian Grey along.

"I'll be right back." I tell her over my shoulder and continue to lead Christian through the restaurant.

I take us outside, to the back of the building, giving us some privacy.

"Christian." I shake my head not knowing what to say, how to even begin. "I'm so confused. She said you were married and when I went to talk to you about it, I saw you with Mia 'Grey'. I've never seen you interact with someone so friendly before. I just assumed..." I can't even explain myself, I don't know what to say. "I swear I really thought she was your wife. You look nothing like siblings, I didn't know you were adopted, and I thought you would say anything to get me to stay. Oh god, I am so sorry I didn't believe you." My eyes are filled with tears by the time I've finished.

"Who said I was married?" Is all he asks.

"I don't know. Some woman at the charity event approached me in the restroom. She said when your wife is away on the weekends, that's when you 'play'. I think she may have been an ex of yours, because she said that you and her had an affair, so that's how she knew."

I turned my back to avoid seeing them kiss, now I realize he must of kissed her cheek.

"What did she look like?"

"Well, she had on a mask, so I'm not sure."

"I need something, Anastasia, anything."

"Her mask covered her face and hair completely, but I think she may have been a brunette. She was wearing a black gown. I think she was in her late 30s, I'm not sure, her mask covered quite a bit." I try to give him any details I remember about the woman. "Do you have any idea who she could be?"

"No." He looks so furious.

I'm not sure if it's at the situation or with me, but I would bet it was with me, that I didn't believe him.

"My ex-Subs know not to say anything, they know the consequences if they did, and there are many guests who wear head pieces and black dresses in their 30s." He continues as he rubs his face, sounding frustrated and annoyed.

"I'm so sorry, Christian. I know you don't like to get personal with your Subs, but we really know very little about each other and I rarely know you. I guess I should Google you. I probably should have after you told me you were Christian Grey but I didn't." I shrug my shoulders apologetically. _Because_ who _he is doesn't matter to me._

"I've told you before, I liked you not knowing who I am. It's my fault that you don't know much about me, and that you didn't believe me. If I had been more forthcoming, about me knowing who you were, or my name, perhaps you would have. But we'll discuss this later."

"Later?" I ask hopeful.

"Later." I can hear the dominance slipping in his tone. "Elliot and Katherine are probably wondering where we are. Let's go back inside."

I don't want to leave this unfinished. What if he doesn't want to see me again, I have to explain.

"Christian, I'm so sorry. I admit, I overreacted. When the lady said you were married, I couldn't believe her so I was going to speak to you about it, but then I saw you with Mia, interacting so friendly. You didn't look like siblings, and because Mia's last name is Grey... well, I foolishly believed that you were married. And Mia was hugging you. You wont let me touch you, so I just assumed. I should have talked you, I know that, but I let my emotions and my old insecurities take over. It didn't help when I went to pick up my car from Escala, saying I knew your secret, and you looked panicked that I did. What s-"

"Later." He snaps, using his full Dominant tone now, interrupting me, so I nod.

"I really am sorry." I feel the need to stress this even after the umpteenth time I've said it.

"If you would have just let me explain, listen to me, we could have avoided this misunderstanding, all this... suffering."

 _Suffering?_

"You seem to be fine." _More than fine_. He looks his usual self.

"Appearances can be deceiving, Anastasia." He says quietly. "I've been anything but fine."

I want to ask if there's still an us, but my unasked question is soon answered when he lunges at me, pushing me against the building, holding my hands above my head, and kissing me, rough and demanding. Christian holds my wrists together with one hand, not letting me touch him, and his other hand is grasping my hip and pulling me toward him. I moan feeling his erection on my belly. His thumb is caressing my bare skin under my shirt. His tongue pushes inside, without asking permission, dominating my mouth. I submit to him completely as we continue to kiss a kiss so full of the longing carnal desire we feel for each other.

 _Oh how I've missed him._

I'm left panting and wanting when he pulls away.

"You are _fucking_ mine." He growls between his teeth, holding my chin up so I'm forced to look into his eyes. "Do you understand?"

I nod my head rapidly as best as I can.

"Answer me." He demands.

"Yes, sir. I'm yours. I understand."

"Good girl." He gives me a chaste kiss.

 _Oh god, I'm going to need new panties_.

"Don't ever leave me again."

"I wont." I shake my head as best as I can since he's still holding me.

"Do you mean that?" His sexy brow arches in question, his eyes searching mine for the truth.

"Yes, sir." I say with as much determination as I can muster.

He crashes his lips to mine again, holding my hands and my chin, in what I can only describe as a grateful kiss.

"I'm going to punish you, Anastasia." He murmurs against my mouth after pulling my lip with his teeth. "Tonight."


	15. (15) Count, Anastasia

**APOV**

"Don't ever leave me again." There's something about his tone. It's not Dominant, it's not demanding. I don't know what it is, but I've not heard him like this before, not even when he couldn't find me last week in his apartment. I would say desperation, but surely that can't be it. The way he's looking at me, it's like he _needs_ to hear me say it.

"I wont." I shake my head as best as I can since he's still holding me.

"Do you mean that?" His sexy brow arches in question, his beautiful eyes searching mine for truth.

"Yes, sir." I say with as much determination as I can muster.

I don't ever want to feel that pain again. I'm not going anywhere as long as he'll have me.

He crashes his lips to mine in what I can only describe as a grateful kiss.

"I'm going to punish you, Anastasia." He murmurs against my mouth after pulling my lip with his teeth. "Tonight."

I swallow hard and nod, knowing I deserve it, and not in the ... _oh, you know what I mean._ I didn't trust him. We have a Dom/Sub relationship, BDSM is all about trust, and I didn't believe him to tell me the truth. I don't think I could express how sorry I am.

"Please don't be angry with me." I beg of him.

He runs his fingers through his hair, closes his eyes tight, and sighs.

When he opens his eyes, they are much softer as he runs his thumb across my bottom lip, then tucking some of my hair behind my ear.

"Let's go back inside." He's more gently now. "We'll talk more later."

When we finally make it back to our table, Chad is talking with Kate and Elliot.

 _Great!_ I didn't see it as a bad thing if I was going on a blind date with a stranger, but now that Christian and I have talked, I'm starting to regret my decision to come _here_ instead of the Mile High. Chad and Christian have both known me intimately, and what has been going on the past few days, to an extent. This will only increase Kate's curiosity.

When Christian notices Chad at our table his hand snakes around my waist, possessively, holding onto my hip. I try to get him to remove it, since Kate and Elliot are with us, but he's so much stronger than I and wont budge. I put on a smile when Chad turns around.

"Hey, Anastasia. I was just asking Katie where you were."

He tries to hug me but it's a little awkward with Christian holding me, though Chad does manage to kiss my cheek. Over Chad's shoulder, I see Kate looking on suspiciously, trying to figure out what's going on. _Oh no!_ I'm going to get the Katherine Kavanagh Inquisition for sure.

 _What can I say?_

 _'Kate, you know my old Dom, though you don't know he's a BDSM Dominant, meet my new Dom. And oh yeah, they despise each other_.'

"Grey." Chad's curt with him.

"Garrett." Just as curt, though his tone sounds more like a warning.

Neither makes a move to shake hands, they're just standing tall and Dominant, almost glaring at each other.

 _They aren't hiding their feelings for each other very well, are they?_

"Well, I better be getting back." Chad says to the group. "Enjoy your evening."

Christian helps me into my chair after Chad excuses himself.

"So..." Kate begins, looking between Christian and I suspiciously as she cocks her head to the side. "How do _you_ two know each other."

Kate and Elliot are both looking at us, waiting for an explanation. Kate has her journalism face on, ready for the scoop of a good story, while Elliot looks relaxed with his arm around Kate's chair, playing with her hair.

"GEH." "We don't." Christian and I say at the same time.

"We don't." "GEH." We say again at the same time and I have to laugh.

I guess we should have thought about this before we came back inside, but we were too distracted with our own situation.

"What we mean is. We don't _know_ each other, but I work at GP." I explain with a shrug of my shoulders. "Mr. Grey owns GEH and GEH bought SIP."

"Uh-huh." Kate's still looking at us just as suspicious, but thankfully the waitress arrives, and apparently this is not her first visit to the table.

Elliot and Kate have already ordered their drinks, but waited for Christian and I before they ordered their meal.

After the waitress leaves we're alone once more. I suspect Kate to continue questioning my knowledge of Elliot and Christian, knowing the Grey brothers, and me going to the charity event, but she's thankfully more enthralled with Elliot to even bother. I don't know much about Elliot, but he doesn't seem as interested in how Christian and I know each other like Kate was. He's more into Kate.

Thankfully Kate and Elliot are so captivated with each other they don't pay Christian and I much attention. I'm trying to think of what to tell Kate; why I wont be home tonight. I didn't even think about what I would say when she returned and I was gone every other weekend. I know she will ask questions to the point of interrogation once we're alone, but what do I say? I have an NDA with Christian so I can't tell her about him.

Our waitress returns with our food and drinks, so we begin to eat.

"I need to tell Kate about us." I whisper to Christian so low when Kate is preoccupied with Elliot so she wont hear me.

"No." His response is curt and immediate.

"Christian, please. I have to tell her where I am. I wont tell her what we do, just that I'm with you."

"Anastasia," He sighs in defeat, nodding his head. "Tell her what you need to, but nothing too explicit."

"I'll think of something." I assure him.

He nods again and continues eating.

I know he doesn't want anyone to know about his affairs, why else have Subs sign NDAs. And Kate does work at _Seattle Times_ , so she's involved with the media. I know Kate would never say anything out of respect for me, but Christian doesn't know that or her. I'm sure I will think of something to tell Kate without telling her about my involvement with Christian Grey.

We all talk throughout our meal like a real date, though Christian isn't very warm towards me. I'm not sure if it's because he's upset with me or if he's putting on a show for Kate and Elliot. I'm just glad he's forgiven me. I hope. Or maybe he plans to punish me before he leaves me. I push that thought out of my head real quick, not wanting to think that's a possibility.

Every time Chad comes to our table, or is within sight, Christian puts his hands on me, possessively, so Chad can see, but Kate and Elliot cannot. I want to roll my eyes but I'm already in enough trouble as it is, so I refrain. Besides, it feel good to have him touching me again.

Kate and Elliot are more talkative than Christian and I, but we all do make casual conversations throughout.

Soon the double date comes to an end and the guys walk us out to Kate's car.

Kate and Elliot are connected at the mouth like some weird science experiment, while Christian and I stand on the sidelines.

Christian does take my hand and gives my knuckles a gentle peck, sending shock waves to my sex, and tells me he expects me at Escala shortly.

"Laters, baby." He murmurs quietly, promising, putting some of my hair behind my ear.

His hand lingers a bit longer than necessary, but I long for his touch. I haven't been near him in 6 damn days, and it's my fault entirely.

I nod.

After Kate and Elliot are finished with their PDA, Kate and I get into Kate's car. I'm trying to think of what I can tell her, because I know she will start questioning me, now that we're alone. And it doesn't take long for her to start.

"So what's with you and Christian Grey?" She asks before we even leave the parking lot.

"Nothing, I work for him. Just one of his many slaves." I smirk at the inside joke only I would know.

"Hmm." She doesn't seem to believe me. _Shoot._ "There's something about the way he was looking at you."

"Oh?"

"Yeah, and you him. You were pretty upset when you thought he was married, and then you take him outside when you discover he's actually single. You were gone for quite awhile and when you finally come back in, Grey and Garrett have some sort of pissing contest in your honor. He wouldn't even let you go to hug Chad for goodness sake. So what's going on, Steele?"

"Nothing, Kate." I try to come up with a logical explanation. "I just wanted to check that he was in fact single if he was going out on a date. Surely a man like that couldn't be single and available, is all. I guess I misread the article when I looked up my boss, and I just wanted to talk to him about the date since he _is_ my boss. I didn't want it to affect my career." I don't want to lie to her so I change the subject. "Are you going to Elliot's tonight?"

Maybe if she goes to his place, I can go to Christian's without having to say anything.

"No _p_ e." She parks her car in our apartment parking lot and continues talking after we get out. "I told him I'll see him Sunday so I'm all yours tonight and tomorrow. And you, my dear, are changing the subject. I know there's something going on, Ana. So what is it?"

"Nothing's going on. You and Elliot set up this double date, he was probably acting like that because I was his date."

"Well, then what about you going to a charity event? How did that come about?"

"GEH employees were given the option to attend. Everything was paid for by the company, and I was bored at home without you with nothing to do, so I went with a couple girls from work, but I didn't stay very long since I was way out of my element there. I didn't mention it, because it was work related and I completely forgot about it."

"A work related opportunity?" She doesn't sound like she believes me.

"Yeah. Benefits for working at GEH."

We walk inside our apartment, and thankfully she lets it go.

It's unusual for Kate to drop something without getting all the answers, but I'm not questioning her about that on this matter. I signed an NDA, so I couldn't tell her even if I wanted to. I'm just thankful she's not giving me her usual inquisition.

I bite my lip trying to think of what I can tell her as to where I'm going, and overnight at that. Not just over night, I'm sure Christian will want me to stay the whole weekend. I know I do. Our first weekend was cut short, and I've missed him.

"Hey, did you borrow my burgundy bag?" Kate asks, setting her gold clutch on the counter. "It will go great with the outfit I plan to wear when I go out with Elliot on Sunday."

"Yeah. It's in my room."

"Are you done with it?"

"Yeah, go ahead. It's yours."

"Thanks, I'll grab it later. Ready to watch a movie?"

"Sure." _What else can I say?_

"Great. Let's get our pajamas on first. I'll get the ice cream."

I walk to my room and change, while Kate goes to hers.

After I'm dressed and before I walk out, I send Christian a text.

 **I don't know what to tell Kate. -A**

 ** _You don't have to tell her anything. You're an adult and she's not your mother.  
What you do have to do, is get your sexy ass over here so I can punish it. -C_**

I huff.

 _Does he not understand she will ask questions?_

When I walk out, Kate already has the ice cream ready and is putting the movie on.

I sit next to her, not really watching as I try to think of what I can tell her.

Soon my phone goes off with a text alert, so I read the text Christian sent me.

 _ **I'm waiting. I'm not a very patient man, Anastasia. -C**_

 **I know. I'm coming. -A**

 _ **I think whether you cum or not is up to me, Ms. Steele. -C**_

"Who are you texting that has you blushing like that?"

"Christian." I say slowly with a smile, not realizing what I just said.

I quickly snap my head to hers, trying to think of something to say, to correct my brain to mouth filter.

"Your ex?"

That's when I get a great idea.

"Yeah. You remember that guy I told you about that I met online? Christian?"

"Yeah."

"Well, we ended things due to a misunderstanding. We worked it out so are going to try again."

"That's great." She smiles sounding happy for me.

"Yeah, and he kind of wants to meet up tonight. You don't mind do you?"

"Are you kidding, Ana? Not at all. He's the reason you've been moping around all week."

"Really? You don't mind if I bail?"

"Go!" She tosses a throw pillow at me.

I giggle and toss it back before I get up and go to my room to change.

It may be wishful thinking, but I pack an overnight bag too.

I also change into sexier panties because I know Christian will want to scene as soon as I arrive.

I'm a little worried about the punishment scene if I'm to be honest. This is why I left Chad. What if I get Christian back just to leave him after the punishment scene. He knows I don't like or want punishments but I did agree to try. I'll have to remember my safewords.

 **I'm on my way, sir. -A**

I send a quick message to Christian, then walk back out to the main room where Kate is no longer into the film.

She looks like she's in journalism-mode, getting into a story. She's sitting on the couch with her legs crossed, her computer on her lap now, typing vigorously away. I'm actually quite surprise she hasn't interrogated me more than she did about 'online Christian', the real Christian Grey, Elliot, and the whole charity event thing.

Perhaps her mind is still in Barbados.

I say goodbye to Kate, then drive to Escala.

I park my car in a spot labeled PENTHOUSE, grab my bag, and rush to the elevator.

The doors open, and it moves as soon as I input the code.

It doesn't take very long for the elevator to arrive in the foyer of Christian's apartment.

When I step off, I see Taylor standing with his hands behind his back near the double doors.

"Good evening, Ms. Steele." He says professional.

I hope he's not upset that I unintentionally blew him off earlier today.

"Evening, Taylor."

"I'm glad you're back." He flashes a rare smile that I can't help but return.

"Me too." _You have no idea how glad I am to be back._

"Mr. Grey is expecting you, ma'am."

I nod and enter the apartment when he opens the door for me.

As soon as I walk in, I'm attacked.

Christian was waiting just on the other side of the door and as soon as I walked through, he grabbed me, making me drop my bag, held my hands behind my back and kissed me, pulling my bottom lip with his teeth.

 _I'm officially wet._

"I want you in the Playroom in 15 minutes for your punishment, Ms. Steele."

I quickly look around, hoping Taylor didn't hear him, but Taylor is no longer in sight.

"Now, Anastasia." He uses his sexy Dom voice.

"Yes, sir." I get into my role of Submissive.

I grab my bag, dash upstairs, and go to my room to get ready.

When I enter my room, I notice books on the bed.

I walk towards the bed and see they are the _Tess of the D'Urbervilles_ First Editions from the gala. I smile sadly at the note he left, saying this is his second chance to give them to me. I carefully pick up the first book, examining the first edition closely, as I run my finger along the title page. I pick up the other two books and set all three of them on the side table, planning to only read them here, if I have time.

I need to get ready for my punishment scene.

I was going to leave my bag on the bed, but I notice the walk-in closet door is open.

Upon closer inspection, it's lined with designer clothes, heels, everything. My clothing I left here from last time is also in here, put away nicely, however, they don't compare to the beautiful designer clothing. I run my finger along the racks of clothing. I pull open drawers to see delicate lingerie.

I've never been much for shopping or clothing, especially designer clothes, but these are beautiful and I didn't have to go anywhere to purchase them.

I realize I don't have long before I'm to be in the Playroom so I quickly grab one of the expensive lace panties in a pretty blue that matches my eyes, rid my clothing and put them on, then I braid my hair down my back, knowing it's how Christian said he wants me presented to him in a scene. Lastly, I grab the robe on the back of the door to hide my body while I rush to the Playroom.

I hang the robe on the back of the Playroom door, get into position, take a deep calming breath and prepare my mind to be Submissive.

It doesn't take long for my Dom to enter, and when he does I keep my head bowed Submissively, though I can see the frayed edges of his distressed jeans.

I know I'm not the best Submissive, but I have gotten quite well at portraying the role in a scene, however, tonight I think I am literally shaking, unsure if this punishment will make or break us. I pray that it wont break us. I just got him back. He knows my limits regarding pain and I will remember my safewords. I _will_ remember my safewords.

 _Yellow to slow. Red to stop. Yellow to slow. Red to stop_. _Yellow to sl-_

"I was going to pleasure you last weekend." He begins, bringing me from my thoughts of the safewords. "I planned on bringing you back here and pleasuring you all night long, but you left me so I couldn't. Today's scene will be for my pleasure, not yours."

I feel him move behind me, then he takes my hands and ties them together behind my back with something silky.

"Look at me." He says when he's standing directly in front of me so I immediately obey.

And when I look up I realize this is the only second time I have ever seen his exposed chest. He's always worn his T-shirt, except during our first playroom scene, but my head was bowed Submissively so I only saw his sexy V and happy trail until he blindfolded me. I saw him naked in his room before we left for the gala, but I wasn't really looking at _that_ part of his body.

"Oh my god." I breathe out of turn as I check out this man, this god like man, this god like man that is mine again.

"I'm going to fuck your mouth, Ms. Steele." His voice is hoarse, husky, and slightly less Dominant.

My is slack, as I watch him undo his jeans and pull out that monster sized dick. He is definitely a blessed man. _My_ man.

"Let's test your oral skills, shall we?" He taps my mouth with his dick's head, getting his pre-cum on my lips. "Open."

I realize I was just staring at his huge dick in awe, but then I realize, I'm not supposed to do anything unless he instructs me to, so my stupor was actually useful this time. I'm surprised I wasn't drooling.

"Eyes on me."

Before I open my mouth for him, I glance up through my lashes, obeying his request. He's staring at me, waiting, as he runs his tongue over his top teeth. It's arousing, very arousing, to see his desire, his desire for me and my mouth.

Leaning forward, my eyes still on his, as he requested, I open my mouth as wide as I can to adjust to his size and wrap my lips around the head of his erection, sucking gently, tasting his pre-cum. I watch him hiss through his clenched teeth.

"That's it." His voice is much more hoarse and filled with want. "Suck me, baby."

If this is to be my punishment, I will gladly disobey him, but not in the way that lead us to end this relationship.

Contradicting what I just thought, about disobeying him, I obey and greedily suck his dick to make up for what happened.

He impatiently grabs my head, thrusting his hands in my hair, and begins to move.

Christian moans above me as he moves his dick, flexing his hips but keeping my head still, fucking my mouth.

So I don't hurt him, I cover my bottom teeth with my tongue, and continue to suck and suck, harder and harder, wishing I could hold him while I do this, but with my hands bound behind my back it's proving difficult. His grunts and groans are turning me on and making me wet.

 _Who knew giving someone pleasure could be so erotic?_

I feel his dick hit the back of my throat so I swallow, deep throating him.

"Whoa, fuck!"

Christian continues to fuck my mouth, hitting the back of my throat each time with a grunt, so I continue to swallow since he moans when I do that.

I feel his dick pulsing, so bravely bare my teeth, and that's when he explodes in my mouth.

"Ahhh... Fuck!" He throws his head back and grasps my hair tight, almost to the point of pain.

I cup my tongue, swallowing every last delicious drop he gives me.

When he pulls out of my mouth his erection is now tamed but he's still very well endowed.

I look at him unSubmissively through my lashes, wanting to know how I did with my first blow job.

 _He came, and rather soon too, so I did well, right?_

He's panting as he looks at me in awe.

I smile, knowing he's pleased, and get back into my Sub-mode.

He reaches behind me and pulls on my silky restraints, releasing my hands.

"Put me away." He demands through his panting.

"What?!" I shout, snapping my eyes to his, unSubmissively.

 _I get to touch him?!_

He raises his brow.

"I'm sorry... I mean, yes, sir."

 _Oh my gosh, this is the first time I'm able to touch him and it's his dick?!_

He's usually the one touching me, I have yet to touch him.

Tentatively, I reach for his dick. He's smooth and firm, already starting to harder even after just releasing his seed into my mouth. Carefully, I place him back inside his jeans. There's no zipper on these jeans, just a bunch of buttons, so I begin to fasten them one at a time. He tells me to leave the top undone so I stop when I reach it.

"It's time for your punishment, Ms. Steele."

Darn, I thought sucking his dick was punishment.

 _Really, Ana? Why would sucking him be your punishment?_

He grabs me under my arm and easily lifts me, so I stand with his help.

"Go chose a paddle, Ms. Steele."

"A-a p-paddle... sir?" I stutter my hesitation.

"Yes, Ms. Steele. I'm going to spank you with it, so choose wisely."

He gives my ass a slap to get me moving.

I walk nervously to the wall of whips, canes, floggers and paddles to choose a paddle for my punishment. I glance over my shoulder to see he's still standing where I left him, watching me. _Oh god why is he making me do this?_ I have no idea which to choose.

I begin touching and examining the paddles that line the wall then grab one I think would be okay.

I turn around to show Christian which implement I've chosen, and he shakes his head as he saunters towards me.

"That one would be too extreme for you and your low pain tolerance."

He takes it from me and gets a different one.

 _Why couldn't he just choose to begin with, I obviously have no experience_.

He puts the new paddle into the back pocket of his jeans, then puts a single finger in the air, signaling me to turn around.

I'm shaking like a leaf as I turn, my back facing him now. I jump when I feel him behind me, putting his hands on my hips. This is the most non-Sub I have ever been in a scene, but I'm so scared he will push me too far and I wont want any part of BDSM again. _Or him_. I just got him back, I can't loose him again.

"I wont push you too far." He says gently. "I know your limits."

I nod.

"Do you trust me?" He's still gentle.

"Yes." I say without hesitation and he doesn't reprimand me for not labeling him.

"I'm not going to hurt you."

I nod again.

"Safewords?"

"Yellow to slow. Red to stop."

"Remember those, Anastasia. Do _not_ forget them. You can stop me at anytime."

"I- I wont forget." _Shit, I forget again_. "Sir."

Okay, I forgot to address him properly, but I'm nervous. I most definitely will _not_ forget the safewords.

 _Yellow to slow. Red to stop. Yellow to slow. Red to stop_.

He loops his fingers into my panties and slides them over my ass, letting them fall to the floor so I step out of them.

"Bend over the bench." He demands softly.

 _Okay, I can do this_.

I immediately yet hesitantly obey, bending over the leather bench.

As I lay across the bench on my front, I realize my hands are not tied or restrained in anyway. I wait for him to restrain me, but he doesn't. I'm trembling, so I keep them near my head, holding onto the bench. I close my eyes tightly, bracing for my punishment.

"We're here because you believed the bullshit lies of a stranger over your Dom, Anastasia. I'm going to hit you six times and you will count."

He gently caresses my behind, running his warm hand all over both cheeks and down to the tops of my thighs. I'm sure he can feel how tense my body is. My breathing is almost nonexistent. I keep my eyes closed tight, waiting for the first blow to come.

"I'm doing this so you will learn to trust me, believe me to tell you the truth. Regardless if I keep information from you, Anastasia, I will never lie to you."

He removes his hand from my ass, replacing it with the paddle.

"Count, Anastasia."

* * *

 **A/N: _To answer some who asked: No. Punishments are not 'off the table' in their relationship.  
(See chapter 7 when they discussed the contract.)  
_** ** _ & Yes, Christian knows why she left her ex; due to the belting incident._**

 ** _For those who didn't want to look, as that chapter is quite long:_**

 ** _Christian said:_** "As I've said, punishments are part of the lifestyle. We may only have a few rules, but you may require punishments, and I would enjoy punishing you. We need to go over methods of punishments you're comfortable with right now, and as we explore your limits, we can increase intensity or try different methods." **_And they discussed punishments..._**

 ** _The 'misunderstanding' happened during their Dom/Sub weekend so it's a punishable act.  
(it wasn't in a scene, but it was during their time together)_**


	16. (16) What Is More?

**CPOV**

I know she's nervous because this is how her and Garrett ended their relationship, but I'm a Master and I know what the fuck I'm doing.

While usually I show no mercy to my Subs, she's different, I know that, so I intend to show her how pleasurable pain can truly be.

"I wont push you too far." I'm gentle, but I want her to know I wont go beyond what she can take. This is, after all, our first punishment scene, and I just got her back. She didn't want punishments, but it goes with the territory and I'm about to show her how pleasurable this punishment can be.

"I know your limits." I tell her.

She nods, understanding, but not speaking. I know she's nervous so I don't reprimand her for not saying anything.

"Do you trust me?" My voice is still gentle.

"Yes." I'm pleased when she says this without hesitant, and with meaning. _If only she trusted me a week ago_.

"I'm not going to hurt you." I let her know.

She nods again.

"Safewords?" I need to make sure she knows she can stop this at anytime, especially since she told me she forgot to safeword with Garrett. I've told her before, I will stop if she indicates she doesn't want this in any way, so the safewords are just to remind her she can stop me.

"Yellow to slow. Red to stop."

 _Good girl_.

"Remember those, Anastasia. Do _not_ forget them. You can stop me at anytime." I reassure her.

"I- I wont forget. ... Sir."

I loop my fingers into her panties and slide them over her sexy ass. As I do this, I notice a small damp spot on the front. Seems she was aroused pleasing me, and this pleases me more. I can feel how tense she is right now, due to her pending punishment, so I keep quiet about how wet she got, sucking me.

She steps out of her panties when they fall to the floor.

"Bend over the bench." I demand, getting back into my Dominant role, though I can hear a softness in my tone.

Normally I would restrain her, but from her history with punishments, I don't want her to feel restricted, so I leave her free.

When she's bent over for me, I run my hand along her smooth pale sexy ass, both cheeks, and the top of her thighs. I can't wait to turn her beautiful pale skin a blushing shade of pink. I can feel her body shaking and how tense she is. She doesn't want this, I know, but she will learn.

 _This may be a punishment, but she will learn a lesson_. Trust.

"We're here because you believed the bullshit lies of a stranger over your Dom, Anastasia. I'm going to hit you six times and you will count. I'm doing this so you will learn to trust me, believe me to tell you the truth. Regardless if I keep information from you, Anastasia, I will never lie to you."

I remove my hand and strike her with not as much force as my heavy hand can.

She stays quite, not counting or safewording.

"Count, Anastasia." I remind her.

"One." She's quiet.

"One, what?" I ask softy. She needs to address me properly.

"One, sir."

"Good girl. Are you okay?" I check.

"Yes, sir." She still quiet.

"Are you sure?" I find myself double checking.

"Yes, sir," She assures me. "I'm fine, sir."

"Will you come to me the next time you hear something about me to find out from me personally if it's true or not, Ms. Steele?"

"Yes, sir. I promise."

I strike her again, this time on her other cheek, spreading the warmth, and she doesn't need the reminder to count correctly.

"Two, sir."

"Do you need to safeword, Anastasia?" I check again.

"No, sir." She's still quiet, but her body is finally loosening up and relaxing a bit more.

"Are you going to believe bullshit lies, Ms. Steele?"

I run my hand over her ass that is already starting to turn a blush shade of light pink, feeling the warmth.

"No, sir."

 _smack_

"Three, sir." She says louder than before, more confident, after I've struck her a third time, and again I run my hand all over her ass.

The pattern of her punishment begins; spank, ask her a question as I run my hand over her ass, repeat.

"Are you going to listen to me the next time I try to explain myself, Ms. Steele?"

"Yes, sir."

 _smack_

"Oooh, yes, four, sir."

"Anastasia?" I can hear the humor in my tone when she moans.

Instead of striking her a fifth time, I reach around and in-between her sexy legs, cupping her sex, smirking as I feel how wet she is.

"You're soaked, Ms. Steele." I chastise her as I easily sink my finger inside of her, curling it as I finger fuck her, rubbing against her front wall.

"Ah." She bites her lip to quiet her moans, and tries to keep still, when I continue to stroke her sweet spot.

I can see her back moving rapidly from her increased heavy breathing.

"Oooh," I moan. "I missed you, baby."

She whimpers and bites her lip in response, but doesn't say anything. It worries me, but only for a moment when I remember we're in a scene and she's not supposed to answer me unless I give her permission. I continue to rub her sex, my palm stimulating her clit.

 _So wet. So tight_. _So mine_.

"Did you miss me?" My breathing is shallow now.

"Oh, yes, sir." She moans. "So much."

"Is this your way of showing me you missed me? Do you want me to fuck you, Ms. Steele?"

"Oh, yes, yes!" She moans out unable to control her pleasure, pushing back on my hand; my naughty Sub. "YES, sir, yes."

"Mmmm." I moan when I suck her juices from my fingers. "Let's finish your punishment so I can fuck you properly, Ms. Steele."

"Oh, _please_ , sir." I smirk when she begs for a punishment.

 _Oh, this I like. I like this very much_.

"Are you going to trust me to tell you the truth, Ms. Steele?" I ask my next question, more Dominant than before.

"Oh, yes, sir."

This time I give it to her harder, much harder.

 _SMACK!_

"Five, sir!" She fucking moans the number.

My breathing has picked up. I'm aroused, very aroused. My dick is throbbing and is painfully hard.

 _One more, Grey, then you can fuck her_.

"Are you ever going to leave me again, Anastasia?" I demand to know in a husky tone.

I pull the tab of my jeans to unbutton them and kick them off, before I strike her one last time, that way I am ready to take her.

"No, sir," Her mewling is so erotic. "Never."

"Oh, baby," I moan.

This pleases me immensely that I almost forget to give her her last spanking.

 _SMACK!_

"Six, sir. Oh, _PLEASE,_ sir." She begs me, pushing her sexy ass back defiantly, knowing it's her last strike and I'm going to take her now.

I immediately drop the paddle like it's on fire and enter her swiftly, continuing to pound through her orgasm and smacking her ass hard for cuming without my expressed permission. This causes her to squirt all over. I wasn't going to let her cum tonight in the Playroom; planning on a punishment fuck. I planned to fuck her in her bed before she feel asleep, allowing her to cum then and only then, but her cuming without my permission flutters my heart, knowing she's always came without my permission, with the exception of our first Playroom scene. Her cuming now, after being punished no less, is all the reassurance I need to know she's okay after the spanking.

I clench my jaw as I try to hold off my own orgasm and continue to fuck her until I deem fit.

I'm so going to punish my naughty girl for cuming without permission. And I do so by fucking her nonstop until she's sensitive and weak.

"You." _thrust._ "Are." _thrust._ "Mine." I growl between thrusts.

"Oh, yes, sir. Yes! Yours! Only yours, sir!"

I explode inside her, much too soon, when she shouts that she's mine.

I pull out before I finish my release, quickly flip her over so she's laying on her back, then pumping my dick to cum all over her front. Stream after stream of cum shoot out to cover her body, marking her mine. I rub my cum all over her front being sure I cover her perky tits.

I'm not finished with her yet, but she's already starting to drift, so I'll have to call it a night since it is so late.

After I put my jeans back on, I wrap her in her robe and carry her to her ensuite.

We shower together this time, instead of having a bath. I rub cream on her pink behind, a darker shade than my hand left last weekend.

After I put on the boxer briefs I left in her ensuite for me to use after our scene, knowing I would want to bathe with her like last time, I take her back out to her bedroom. She dons a camisole that leaves nothing to the imagination, with her nipples showing through, and her plain cotton panties, then climbs into her bed.

 _No pajama bottoms tonight, Ms. Steele?_

"Are you.." She yawns, barely holding onto her consciousness, when I climb in behind her "...sleeping with me?"

"No." I kiss her head and hold her, her front to my back. "I just want to hold you for awhile." _So thankful that she's here with me._

She moves her back closer against me as I wrap my arm around her, easily pulling her toward my body.

"Anastasia, about your punishment..." I know she's tired, but I want to talk about it.

"I really liked it." _I know, baby. I could tell_. "Is it bad that I enjoyed my punishment?"

"No." I chuckle because that wasn't much of a punishment, more like a thankful she's back fuck. After all, this is just as much my fault as it was hers. We both are responsible for the variables that lead to what happened. She didn't believe me because I kept things from her, not once but twice. "I've been wanting to show you that pain can be very pleasurable for awhile now."

"It sure can." She purrs, nuzzling closer to me.

"I told you," I kiss the back of her head as I continue. "Pain can be very pleasurable. There's a fine line. Your pain tolerance may be low, but I'm going to test your limits and push you. At some point you may need to safeword because I plan to increase intensity. Hopefully, it's yellow and not red, to let me know when you're close to your limit, but tonight..." I trail off, hearing her light snores and deep breathing.

"Anastasia?"

"Baby?"

She's out like a light.

I lay with her, leaning on my elbow with my head resting on my hand and my other arm around her, watching her as she sleeps until I start to drift myself.

Knowing I can't sleep with her, because of my night-terrors, I reluctantly pull away from her and tread back to my room.

I lay in my bed, thanking fuck she's here. That she came back to me, and we worked this fucked up misunderstanding out.

I think back to what she told me, that someone mentioned to her that I was married, still trying to think who the fuck would do that or even benefit from that, or how the fuck they would even know Anastasia and I were involved. The only thing I can think of is it has to be a previous Submissive of mine, but that doesn't make any sense. What would _they_ benefit from me not being with Anastasia? Not to mention NOBODY knows of our relationship. The only person that knows about Anastasia is Taylor.

I have him checking the guest list from the event, but it's turning out to be a dead end.

 _~FLASHBACK~_

 _"Taylor." I call him as soon as I step off the elevator when I return from my double date with Anastasia, my brother and Katherine._

 _"Yes, sir." He comes from the security room._

 _"Someone accosted Anastasia at the Coping Together charity event. They told her I was married."_

 _He nods._

 _"They were obviously wearing a mask, and it was a woman as they were in the facilities. She was wearing a mask with a head piece, black gown, mid to late-30s. Anastasia suspects she may have been a brunette, but couldn't be sure due to the head piece. I need to find out who it was, search the guest list. They knew of my relationship with Anastasia and felt threatened enough to approach her."_

 _"Yes, sir. I recall a few ladies in attendance with black gowns and full masks. Are you sure brunette, in her 30s, sir?"_

 _"That's what Anastasia said. I didn't see anyone. Why?"_

 _"Sir, perhaps it was Ms. Lincoln that approached Ms. Steele?" He suggests._

 _"No, Elena wouldn't do that."_ _What a ridiculous suggestion._ _"She's not mid-30s, she's late 40s/early 50s, she's not a brunette, and she didn't wear a full mask with a headpiece this year. Besides, she doesn't know Anastasia. I've never introduced them, and she didn't arrange this relationship. I'm not sure who, but it's not Elena. She wouldn't gain anything from me not being with Anastasia. She's set up my previous relationships, so me being with Anastasia would be no different to her than the rest of them. I want to know who, why, and how, and I want to know this yesterday."_

 _~END OF FLASHBACK~_

I lay here thinking about how little Anastasia knows about me. Perhaps she can speak with one of my previous Subs so she knows a little more about what I like and how to please me. My Subs didn't know me personally, but Anastasia _is_ curious about the lifestyle and has only been taught by men, Dominant men, who want her. Maybe she'd like to be informed by a Sub.

I'll ask her how she feels about that tomorrow.

I slowly drift to sleep in my bed, no longer able to keep my eyes open, with a smile on my face, happy she's back with me.

 _ **~..~..~**_

 **APOV**

I blink open my eyes, feeling cold, and wrap the blankets tighter around me as I look out at the night's sky of Seattle.

It's such a beautiful city view, and the views from the penthouse are breathtaking.

I move to get closer to Christian to keep warm but feel nothing behind me so I turn my head and find that he's gone. I pout, though no one can see me. I felt so comfortable with his arms around me. He said he doesn't sleep well so maybe he woke and is awake now.

I try to drift back to sleep but it's proving difficult.

Unable to sleep, I climb out of bed, and tread carefully, as I tip toe down the stairs to look for Christian.

If he's awake, perhaps we can keep each other company.

It's quiet down here, and he doesn't seem to be in the main room.

I look in his office; opening the door after I knocked and received no answer. He's not in here either. Perhaps, he's in his room.

Gently I knock on his door and slowly open it, to find him fast asleep in his bed.

It's only now that I realize I'm only wearing my camisole top and panties.

I quickly tip toe towards his bed, walk around to climb in, and cover my body with the blankets as I look at the handsome man that wants me. They usually do scales from 1 to 10 on how attractive a person is and Christian blows that scale out of the water completely. Sure, Chad is attractive, but Christian is god like attractive. Adonis is the only way to describe this man.

He has his shirt off so I get my first unhurried look at his strong muscular physic. I frown when I see small circular scars.

 _Burns?_ _From BDSM?_

I cautiously reach out to touch one but he begins to stir so I pull my hand back quickly before I can make contact with his skin, like I've been caught taking a cookie from the cookie jar before I've had my dinner. I look at him, but he's still sound asleep.

He said he doesn't sleep well. _I wonder why?_

I run my fingers along his jaw, feeling the stubble there, and his head instinctively leans toward my hand while he sleeps. I move my hand to his hair, feeling how soft it is, as I scooch closer to him and softly kiss his lips. He moans quietly but stays sleeping.

"Goodnight, Christian." I whisper sweetly to his sleeping form, running my thumb over his sexy bottom lip.

I curl up next him, with my head on his shoulder, my arms close to my body, and easily drift back to sleep.

Just before I'm lost, I feel him move, and wrap his arms around me, so I snuggle closer against him.

* * *

I feel myself wake, though I don't want to open my eyes just yet. I know I'm laying on my back, on a comfy bed with the softest sheets.

I smile, remembering I'm back with Christian. But then I realize, I'm in Christian's bed. I open my eyes quickly only to shut them again from the bright morning light shinning through the windows. Trying again, I slowly blink my eyes open to adjust to the early morning light.

When I finally open my eyes, I see a very amused Christian, leaning on his elbow, watching me.

"Morning." I yawn, stretching as I grin at him.

"Good morning, baby. What are you doing in my bed?" I can hear a playful tone in his voice so I don't think he's upset.

"I couldn't sleep." I give him my lame excuse. "Are you upset that I slept with you?"

"No." He shakes his head. "Just don't do it again."

"Why?" I pout.

"I told you, I don't sleep well. I've never slept with anyone because of that reason."

"But you were already sleeping last night when I came in." I explain. "When did you wake?"

"Just now actually," He frowns. "And you gave me quite the surprise when I woke."

"How did you sleep?"

"Well." His frown deepens, a small prominent _v_ forming between his brows, like he shouldn't have slept well.

"Maybe you sleep well with me and we should sleep together." I suggest playfully.

"Perhaps." He gives me a chaste kiss despite the fact that I haven't brushed my teeth yet. "But it's not a theory I want to undergo."

"Why not?"

He sighs, running his hand through his hair, making his bicep bulge as he flexes.

"I have nightmares, Anastasia." He admits. "I've lashed out before."

"Oh." I can't keep how sad I sound out of my voice.

He has nightmares? How do you know you'll have a nightmare before you go to sleep? They must be reoccurring nightmares.

"Okay, I wont sleep with you anymore."

"Although," He's suddenly on top of me. "I think waking up with you has it's advantages."

I laugh loudly throwing my head back when he pushes his dick towards me, still covered in his boxer briefs, so I can feel how hard he is on my hip.

It doesn't take long for Christian to remove our clothing and for us to have some good ol' fashion vanilla.

"I have an idea."

"Oh?" I ask lazily as he holds me, my back to his front.

We're laying naked in his bed after our morning sex. He's drawing circles on my bare shoulder with his finger.

"I was thinking about how you wanted to ask questions about the lifestyle; that's why you went on the chat site. And you've only been enlightened by Doms." He seems apprehensive for some reason, like he's going to tell me something I wouldn't like. "I thought... maybe you can talk to one of my previous Subs."

I suddenly sit to face him as I hold the sheet to cover my breasts.

"I'd like that actually."

"You would?" He seems surprised.

"Yeah." I giggle. "She can help me. You know," I shrug my shoulders. "learn to be more Submissive in the Playroom."

I would prefer it not to be one of his ex-Subs but he's met mine, and it's not like we're in a romantic relationship or anything, it's just Dom/Sub, right? Besides, if it's a confirmed ex of Christian's, perhaps she can give me more insight to this mysterious man.

"Okay, I call and see if I can find one to come today."

"Okay." I giggle when my stomach growls. "Maybe after we've eaten?"

"Go make my breakfast, wench." He leans back, putting both his hands behind his head.

"Excuse me?" I try not to giggle as I ask playfully since he's being playful. I like playful Christian.

"You heard me, wench."

I giggle again.

"I'll make us breakfast only because I'm hungry, but you're making lunch."

I try to take the sheet with me when I stand, but Christian is holding it so I can't.

We are both laughing as we play tug-of-war with the sheet.

I finally win, standing with the sheet, only for Christian to dive across his bed and yank it from my body, so I hurry to put my panties and camisole back on. I didn't sleep in any bottoms last night so I grab Christian's pajama bottoms from the floor, having to tie them tightly so they don't slip off, however, they do hang quite low regardless of how tightly I tie them.

I walk, sashaying a bit too much, as I look over my shoulder at an amused Christian, to blow him a kiss and walk out to make our breakfast.

 _ **~..~..~**_

While I made breakfast, Christian phoned one of his previous Subs who agreed to meet with me today and she's on her way here now.

I've gotten dressed so I don't meet with this girl in mine and Christian's pajamas.

Taylor has come out to let us know she's here and has allowed her access to the apartment since Christian already told him and approved of her visit.

Christian and I stand from the breakfast bar, where we've just finished eating, to wait for the elevator and his ex-Sub to arrive.

 _She sure did jump awfully fast when Christian asked her to do this_.

 _~DING~_

The elevator chimes, announcing it's arrival.

Is it weird that I'm slightly jealous that this woman has had him, yet confident that he's mine now.

The foyer doors open with Taylor showing in a tall, lean, beautiful brunette.

And territorial. Definitely feeling territorial over Christian as I reach for and hold onto his strong forearm, claiming him mine, when the attractive female emerges from behind Taylor, to show her he's mine now. I notice Christian look down at me before he looks back at his ex, but he doesn't say anything about me holding his arm.

Why am I feeling like this over his ex? They aren't together anymore. They've ended their relationship for whatever reason.

 _Is this how Christian feels about Chad?_

She looks about as old as Christian maybe slightly older and oddly similar to me. I can't get a good look at her face because she's looking down in the presence of her ex-Dom, but she's got a killer body and legs for days. My old insecurities kick into overdrive when she stands in front of us. I feel like I'm the incredible shrinking woman, they are both so much taller than I am, but then I notice she has on 6 inch killer heels and I'm still barefoot.

"Anastasia, this is Stephanie Addams." Christian begins to introduce us. "Ms. Addams, this is my Anastasia. Anastasia Steele."

I feel oddly warm and tingly when he's so formal with her and he calls me his.

She finally looks up, only to look at me, not making eye contact with Christian, and that's when I see her pretty face.

I give her a small polite smile and she returns it with a full friendly smile.

"It's nice to meet you, Ms. Steele." Her voice is soft, friendly and inviting, and she's very polite. "Mr. Grey said you wish to speak with me?"

"Yes, and it's nice to meet you as well." I'm just as polite. "Please, call me Ana."

"Only if you call me Steph."

"Okay."

"I'll leave you two ladies to it." Christian says and turns to me, so I let go of his arm and look at him. He puts some of my hair behind my ear as he speaks to me. "Ms. Addams has signed an NDA so feel free to speak freely with her about whatever you want to know."

I nod, understanding, while looking into his gorgeous gray eyes.

"I'll be in my study if you need me."

"Okay. Thank you, Christian."

He touches my elbow, smiling, before he leaves the room.

I look back at Stephanie so we can begin.

She looks... I can't quite place how she looks, almost scared and excited, if you can look both at the same time, maybe a little shocked.

 _I wonder why?_

"Mr. Grey lets you use his given name?" Yes, she's shocked.

"We're not in a scene." I explain confused.

She shakes her head. "Never call your Master by his given name. Golden rule number one, only Sir, Master, or Mr. Grey are acceptable."

"Oh." I frown. _I've always called him Christian. But Master sounds hot, perhaps I should try that._

"I wouldn't be surprised if you are punished later for your infraction."

I squeeze my thighs together and bite my lip, blushing as I remember my punishment last night.

"Would you like to sit?" I sound like we're in my home instead of Christian's.

Should I ask her if she wants something to drink? No, that would seem as if I was portraying this to be my home when it's not.

"Sure."

We walk to the sofa in the large open space and sit next to each other.

"So what would you like to discuss, Ana?"

"Um. Well, I'm very new to BDSM. Actually, I'm not really into the scene. I really only know what Christian and Chad have told me, and from what I read online. I'm very intrigued with the lifestyle, though so I would be interested in knowing more from a Submissive's perspective."

"Chad?"

"He was my first Dominant." I explain. "We dated briefly and he convinced me to try BDSM. I enjoyed the kinky pleasurable sex, however, I'm not a masochist, I don't enjoy pain, so when we moved on to punishments, I told him I couldn't do that again. He told me if I can't do that then we can't be together so I left him. I met Christian online... long story short, we hit it off and I decided to try the lifestyle again with him."

"Do you not have punishments with Mr. Grey?" She asks confused, cocking her head to the side.

"No, we do."

"Okay, so you want to know more about being a Submissive to Mr. Grey? Or in general?"

While I would like to know more about the lifestyle in general from a Sub, she knows what Christian is like and I want to know more about him.

"Just for Christian. I mean, Mr. Grey." Crap, I have to get used to referring to him so formally.

"Well, I've told you rule one; Sir, Mr. Grey, or Master are all acceptable and the only forms of address, at all times. Never ever look him in his eyes or speak at any time, unless he gives you permission to do so. Do anything and everything he asks without hesitation. I saw you hold Mr. Grey's arm when I walked in, without his permission, so I'm not sure if Mr. Grey has told you, but touching him is a hard limit and you did make eye contact while he was speaking with you. That's a big no-no. Have you discussed the contract yet? Everything you need to know is in there. It's a fully detailed description on what your role would be."

"Yes, but... I'm confused and think you may be as well. We only power exchange in the Playroom, not all the time and not when we have vanilla in his bedroom."

"Vanilla?! His bedroom?!" She squeaks, almost mortified, eyes wide. "You've... You've been _in_ his bedroom?"

"Yes, um, we..." I trail off and shrug, not knowing why she's appalled. "...in his bed."

And my room that he gave me to use. We haven't been together very long to have sex anywhere else, but I'm sure we will eventually have sex on every surface, every inch of his apartment. _And I can't wait._

I think I broke her. She's not moving, not blinking, and I don't think she's breathing.

"Stephanie?"

"More." She whispers horrified.

"More? More what?" I'm so confused as I look around.

"You." She's still whispering, unbelieving.

"Me?" _Me, what?_

 _Is it possible to get anymore confused?_

"He gives you... _more_?" She whispers the word more like it's a dirty word.

"I'm not quite sure what you're referring to."

She shakes her head, eyes wide, and suddenly she bows her head Submissively. I look around for Christian, thinking she saw him and is reacting to his Dominant presence like earlier when she wouldn't look at him, but we're still very much alone in this huge great room.

"Stephanie?"

She doesn't answer.

"What are you doing? What's going on? Are you okay?"

When she again, doesn't answer, I am beyond confused. Why is she in Sub-mode? We're alone and I'm not a Dominant.

What do I know, so far I've had three people try to explain this lifestyle and none seem to do the job.

 _Do these people not know what 'new to the lifestyle' means?_

"Talk to me." I demand.

"What would you like me to say, ma'am?" She finally says, sounding more like a robot than the friendly girl that was just here, with her head still bowed Submissively.

"Tell me what's going on." I demand to know. "And _look_ at me."

She lifts her head, her eyes looking void of all emotion. It's really creepy.

"Mr. Grey gives you more." She continues in the less than warm robot voice.

"What is more?"

"Love." She explains robotically.

"Love?" I squeak, shaking my head. "We don't _love_ each other. We just met. We don't even _know_ each other. I'm not his girlfriend if that's what you're thinking. He told me he doesn't do the girlfriend thing, though he didn't call it more. I think he called it hearts and flowers, that he doesn't do romance. We just have a Dom/Sub relationship only."

He doesn't even cuddle after vanilla sex for goodness sake, although, we did cuddle this morning and last night now that I think about it.

She finally snaps out of her really weird trance, blinking like she's been somewhere else entirely.

 _Was she being a Submissive? To me?!_

"Anastasia, I'm warning you." And she does sound like she's warning me as she lowers her voice. "Mr. Grey does not do more. He does not love. I see the look you have in your eyes because I had that look too. He's very easy to love, I know, but if Mr. Grey finds out you want _more_ or you have fallen in love with him." She shakes her head. "Those who have tried for more have had their contract terminated before they could blink, and he will terminate your contract just as quickly. I left before that could happen to me, but there are others... They call themselves the Sub Club. They've told me about it and wanted me to join them, but it's more of a Master Grey obsessed group. Just... don't let that happen to you."

"I understand." I nod, however, I don't know what look she's talking about. "But I'm not... We're not... It's just physical, not emotional."

"Okay, but there's just something... there. Like a spark. I can see it. I don't want you to get hurt like so many others before you have."

I'm about to reply when we hear footsteps coming closer to us.

"How's everything going?" Christian asks us in his Dominant tone.

"Everything's okay." _Still confused, but okay_.

"Did you learn anything?" He asks me dropping his Dominating tone.

"Nothing more than I already knew, really."

"Do you have anymore questions for Ms. Addams?"

I almost forgot she was still here, she's been so quiet since Christian came out.

"Can I have your number?" I ask her. "Incase I have anymore questions."

"Sure." She smiles, friendly again, like nothing weird happened at all.

After I get Stephanie's number, and Taylor shows her out, it's just Christian and I alone again.

"So..." I say casually as I face him. "What are you making me for lunch, Master?" I remember to refer to him formally, trying out the new name for him.

He growls, pulling my body to his, crashing his mouth to mine.

"Playroom first." He murmurs against my lips.


	17. (17) Is This More?

**APOV**

Christian cheated and took me to the infamous Mile High club for lunch instead of cooking our meal. After our Playroom fun, of course.

He told me about the Mile High in our emails, but nothing too detailed about it, just that he owned it. Kate's told me it's two floors; an exclusive restaurant and a night club, each on their own floor. I was a bit anxious that someone would see and notice us together, but Christian quickly put a kibosh on that when he lead me through the back and to a private VIP room so no other diners can see us.

Thankfully he had purchased me clothes, since I had nothing appropriate to wear here, not planning to actually go out. I'm wearing a beautiful designer dress and heels, looking the part, like I actually belong in a place like this. Christian has already complimented me plenty of times, and he looks just as sexy in his attire.

We've already ordered and have been served a most delicious champagne. Bollinger Grande Année Rosé 1999. He said he chose the champagne specifically because of the blush pink color. It brings me back to our pennames; _BlushingRose_ and _FiftyShades_.

"So this is Fifty's?" I joke as I take another sip of the delicious pink champagne after the waiter leaves us.

"Fifty's?" He chuckles, no doubt remembering I thought he owned the small bar across from SIP's old location.

"I can't believe I thought you owned Fifty's Pub." I giggle at myself. "I've never been in there, but I can definitely tell from the outside that it is nothing compared to this place." I explain, looking around the beautiful private room with views of the city through huge windows.

This building is much higher than Escala, and the city views are just as breathtaking, if not more beautiful.

"Maybe I should have named it Fifty's then, huh."

It seems I'm always giggling with this man. Gosh, I'm so thankful he took me back after I fucked up so badly.

"The Mile High Club is better, in my opinion." I giggle yet again.

I blush thinking it'd be like joining the mile high club if we had sex up here.

"Mile High Club definitely sounds better than Fifty's Pub."

That reminds me.

"Um, did you know there's a Sub Club in your honor?" I ask him. "Stephanie mentioned it."

"They've all signed NDAs, so it doesn't matter what they discuss between each other." He brushes it off like it's nothing.

The wait staff re-enter with our food and refill our champagne.

"Happy birthday, Mr. Grey."

Christian nods, not looking pleased, and the waiter leaves us again.

"It's your birthday?!" I squeak, smiling.

Christian nods and begins to eat.

"What are you doing to celebrate?"

"I'm being forced to attend dinner at my parents tonight."

 _Forced?_

"Why didn't you tell me it was your birthday?" He gives me a look. "Right."

"What?"

"We're not in a romantic relationship, so birthdays don't matter. I'm sorry."

"It's not that, Anastasia. I don't like to celebrate my birthday."

"Why?"

"I just don't!"

I flinch when he snaps at me. He's never yelled at me like that before, other than when I was bothering him about Mrs. Robinson. I conclude he gets upset when he's proven wrong. Wrong about what Mrs. Robinson did. Wrong about not wanting to celebrate his birth, for some unknown reason.

I stay quiet and begin to eat, not wanting to upset him more.

Christian sighs and puts his fork down.

"I'm sorry I snapped at you, Anastasia. I just don't enjoy celebrating my birth, is all."

"I shouldn't have pried." I apologize quietly. "Happy birthday, by the way."

"Thank you." He's gentle again, but I can hear the reluctance in his tone to acknowledge his birthday.

We're quiet now as we eat, and the silence is killing me.

"So why did you chose _FiftyShades_ as your screen name?" I ask when we're nearing the end of our meal and still have not conversed.

"Did you enjoy yourself in the Playroom before we arrived? Perhaps, you can join me in there again before you return home."

I squirm, remembering how skillful he is with a riding crop. _Of course I enjoyed it!_

"Is that a question, or a demand, and why are you changing the subject?"

"As for why I chose _FiftyShades_ , I chose it because I'm fifty shades of fucked-up." His tone is very deadpan, and he quickly moves on, changing the topic back to sex. "Regarding the demand or request; It's both a question and a demand. I'm asking you to join me, and I demand your pleasure, as well as mine."

"Are you trying to get me wet?" I squirm in my seat again as my blush never leaves my cheeks. "Because it's working."

"It's a perk." He smirks, wiggling his eyebrows at me as he continues to eat.

I giggle at his playfulness. I'm happy he's in a much brighter mood than moments ago. He's so mercurial. Either way, I'm glad talking about his birthday didn't foil his good spirits too much, I hope. I decided not to question him further about his _'fifty shades of fucked-up'_ statement as it seems he doesn't want to talk about that, and I don't want to ruin our now good mood.

"Are you this silly with all your Submissives?"

"No. With my previous Subs it was a total power exchange, inside and outside the Playroom."

 _Is that what he wants from me? A total power exchange?_

But why wouldn't he tell me when we discussed our relationship that he wants a total power exchange if that's what he wants _._

"I've never taken any of them out for a meal, or to a charity event for that matter." He continues. "Only you."

 _Only me?_ The thought makes me smile.

 _Am I different to him? Do I mean more?_

As I think of this, _more_ , I think of Stephanie, his ex-Sub, warning me not to ask for _more_ from our relationship. He's only taken me to an event or out for a meal; is there more that only I have done? Her reaction to me being in his room, in his bed, comes to mind. She was shocked when she learned of our trysts in _his_ room.

"What about sex in your bed?" I ask quietly.

He slowly shakes his head, keeping his gray eyes on me. "I've never had sex in my own bed."

I feel my heart flutter with excitement. Is this the _more_ that Stephanie was talking about? _If it is, why would he do that for me?_ There are so many girls out there that would do anything this man asks without giving it a second thought. I never understood why he was willing to help me, train me, in this lifestyle when it's so obvious that he's used to his Submissives acting a certain way. A total power exchange relationship.

 _Is_ he giving me _more_ , or is it because our relationship is different from his others. That could explain why he's acting this way. We only have a power exchange in the Playroom after all, and he's never done _this_ kind of relationship before so maybe that's why. Maybe this isn't _that_ type of more.

 _Maybe I could do a total power exchange with him for his birthday? He might like that._

I would love to have celebrated his birthday properly, but what do you get the man that seems to have everything?

"Sex." I sigh the word. "I'm starting to think people use it too loosely."

"What do you mean?"

"I don't know. Everyone has sex nowadays, and it seems like they don't mind who with. It's no longer... making love." I immediately regret saying this after Stephanie's warning. "I mean," I suddenly sit straight up and quickly correct myself. "Not that I would want that at this point in my life. Do you want to play next weekend? I'm not doing anything."

I'm hoping to distract him with sex, to avoid talking about sex. _How ridiculous_.

"I'd love to, however, I have a business trip in Portland this weekend. Though, I should return early Sunday morning, depending how things go. But I wouldn't want to leave you alone, cooped up in my apartment all weekend, waiting for my return."

"Yeah, because I may get claustrophobic in your tiny apartment." I giggle at the thought of his massive apartment actually being tiny.

"That is such a beautiful sound." He says so sincerely but I didn't hear anything.

"What is?"

"Your giggle."

"That's not the first time you've heard me laugh, Christian. I've been giggling non-stop since we arrived."

I'm usually not this much of a giggler.

"Ah, but when you do, tis a wonderful sound, Ms. Steele."

 _It is safe to say I am permanently blushing around this man_.

"I want to give you something for your birthday." I say cautiously, not wanting him to get upset like he did earlier.

"Anastasia, you really don't need to-"

"I want to." I take a deep breath before I tell him what I plan to give him. The only thing I can on such a short notice. Me. "I want to give you... total power exchange for your birthday."

"What?" He asks dumbfounded. "Carte blanche?"

"Yes, sir." I bow my head Submissively and stay quite.

"Oh, fuck. Anastasia." He groans, dropping his fork on his empty plate making a clinking sound.

I stay quiet, Submissive.

"Check!" I bite my lip as I try not to giggle when he asks for the check in the restaurant he owns.

 _ **~..~..~**_

We step off of the elevator of Escala together, and enter Christian's apartment, going right instead of left and up the stairs. I want to ask where we are going, but I stay quiet since I told him I would give him a total power exchange outside the Playroom today, for his birthday.

Christian has been unusually quiet since we left the restaurant, and even more so in the elevator on the way up to his apartment. He's been running his fingers through his hair since we got inside the car. During the short time that I've known him, I've noticed he only runs his hand through his hair when he's nervous, frustrated, or upset. I've never heard him so quiet before, though so I'm unsure how he's feeling or if this is how he is in full time Dom-mode.

I don't know if he's trying to plan a scene at the last minute off the top of his head, or what, but whatever he plans, I hope it's nothing too bad.

 _Are hard limits still in place?_ Perhaps I should ask.

Instead of saying _'permission to speak, sir'_ , I keep my head down, Submissively. Whatever he has planned for this scene, I know I will enjoy, because I trust him. I think that's what the punishment last night was all about; trust. I needed to trust that he wouldn't go beyond my limits, and I need to trust him to tell me the truth.

I let him lead me as he holds my hand.

 _Why does it tingle when he touches me?_ Something as simple as holding hands, gives me butterflies.

"I want to do something." He says as he opens his bedroom door. "Try something I've not done before."

I don't ask any of the so many questions I have floating around in my mind.

 _What hasn't he done before?_ _He told me he's done everything. What else is there that he hasn't already done? Should I be worried? If he hasn't done everything, then why hasn't he done this yet, whatever this is?_

"I think I've been waiting for you." He seems to answer my thoughts.

I stay quiet, still looking down, in Sub-mode.

"Anastasia." He pauses. "... I want to make love to you."

And that snaps me out of my Submissive state as I look at him, surprised.

 _I don't make love. I fuck... hard_. His words come back to me. _Try something_ _I've not done before_. I've not done this before either. _Oh god._ But I want to, I want to more than anything, and I want it with this man, with Christian.

"You..." I clear my throat. "You don't want me to be Submissive?" I check.

He slowly shakes his head as he saunters toward me, unbuttoning his shirt. "No, baby."

"Y-you want to ... make love?"

"With you." He adds, removing his shirt completely.

"I-I thought you didn't make love?" My voice is shaky. "I thought you fucked."

"I'd like to try, maybe combine the two, we'll see. I just really want to make love to you. This doesn't mean I've come over all hearts and flowers. I just really want to make love to you, Anastasia."

He's gazing down at me. looking so intently, like he's waiting for me to respond but the only thing I can do is nod.

I tilt my head up when he leans down to kiss me softly, but when I try to touch him, he grabs my wrists stopping me and putting them behind my back, so I pull away from our sweet kiss.

"I want to touch you."

"Hard limit." He reminds me, shaking his head, a pained look on his face.

"I know, but we're not in a scene, Christian, and I want to touch you. I want to make love to you and touch your body. Let me."

"Anastasia," He sounds like he's in pain when I try to free my hands. "I can't."

"Why?"

I can almost see the shutters coming down when he finally lets my hands go, and backs away from me, keeping a safe distance.

"Why wont you tell me?" I look at his bare chest. "Is it because of your burns?"

"Partly." His voice is a warning, like he doesn't want to talk about it, but I ignore it.

"Why didn't you safeword?"

"I didn't receive them in a scene, Anastasia, BDSM is consensual." He says like it's ridiculous, that I think this, but what am I supposed to think when he wont tell me. "I have haphephobia." He admits. "I had a rough start in life, you don't want that shit in your head, and I don't want it in mine when I want to do this with you. Can we just do this without you touching me?"

I don't know what haphephobia is, but phobia means an extreme fear of something. He doesn't want to be touched, and I know he's not a germaphobe so it must have something to do with touch. But we touch all the time, well he touches me. And our most private parts are nearly constantly touching. Maybe it's just certain areas.

 _A rough start to life?_

I glance at his chest once more before looking into his eyes. He's right, I don't want that in my head when we're about to make love.

I walk up to him but he backs away like a scared animal.

"I wont touch you." I halt my movements as I reassure him.

This gives him comfort as he finally looks more like himself, confident and in control.

Even though neither of us has never done this before, I let him take the lead since he seemed almost freighted when I tried.

We keep eye contact as he comes closer to me, almost touching me. I close my eyes, when I feel the back of his knuckles caress my cheek, and lean towards his touch. He moves his hand to my chin, tilting it up and giving me a sweet gentle peck.

When he pulls away, I stay on my tiptoes, following him, not wanting to stop.

I blink open my eyes to see him already watching me. My eyes go straight to his lips when he licks them as he reaches around to unzip my dress, letting it fall to the floor. I'm thankful I chose a pair of the sexy lingerie that Christian bought me so I'm not standing in front of him in my comfy cotton set like the first time.

Slowly but surely, my lace bra and panties come off, as well as my heels.

I'm now fully exposed to him while he stands wearing his trousers.

He reaches for his belt and begins to unbuckle it. I want to do that, I've done it before during our first encounter, perhaps he'll let me again.

"Can I?" I ask quietly, unsure how he will react.

He stops his actions and moves his hands away for me to continue the task.

I step forward, keeping my eyes on his while I finish unbuckling his belt, then unbutton his pants, unzip them, and let them fall to the floor.

He steps out of his shoes and pants at the same time.

We're now both completely bare.

The only sound in the room is the beating of our hearts, racing, and our breathing, labored.

He slowly lays me on his bed, and I scooch up to get in a better position. I think this is the quietest we've ever been while being intimate. We're both so serious now, our faces impassive. You would think we're not enjoying ourselves, and it makes me giggle.

"Now is not the time for giggling, baby." I see a smirk play on his sexy face now as he climbs onto the bed after me.

"I'm sorry, I do apologize." I bite my lip to keep me from giggling at his playfulness.

I hear a deep primal growl come from him. It's very animalistic and very arousing.

"Don't bite your lip, Anastasia," He warns me. "or this will be over much quicker than either of us wants."

My mouth forms a perfect O, effectively releasing my lip, as he kisses up my thigh to my sex. He kisses, nips and licks his way up, but completely bypasses the area I want him most, as he continues kissing across my pubic bone with wet openmouthed kisses. Every time he passes near my sex, it clenches deliciously.

I'm trying not to move and I keep my hands fisted in the sheets so I'm not tempted to touch him. And it's now that I realize, this is the only time we've been intimate that he's not restrained my hands in any way, whether it be holding me down or tying me up.

He's trusting me not to touch him. _Trust._

So I'm not tempted to ruin that trust, I lift my hands and hold onto the underside of the headboard of his massive bed while he continues to kiss up my body. I'm flushed, panting, and filled with want. I squirm when he gets to my breasts, hoping he will grab my nipple between his teeth and tug, or at the very least, suck on my nipples.

I feel him smirking against my mound as he gets closer to my nipple.

"OH!" I whimper when he passes my nipple, completely ignoring it, as he continues his journey up my body.

"You have a beautiful body, Anastasia."

I'm too flustered, hot and bothered to say anything, so I just hum in agreement as I turn my head, giving him access to my neck.

He chuckles against my neck, leaving openmouthed kiss to my jaw. Finally reaching my mouth he gives me the most passionate, sweetest, gentlest kiss ever, that leaves me wanting. For a man who hasn't done this before, he sure seems to know what he's doing, with the exception of his teasing.

"I'm going to make love to you now, Anastasia."

"Yes." I sound desperate. "Please."

"Keep your eyes open, I want to see you."

He kisses my lips once more as he spreads my legs with my assistance. He balances himself on one hand then reaches down to grasp his dick, lines himself up then moves his hand back on the bed. Slowly he pushes himself forward, entering me. I moan feeling each incredible inch fill me. He stays still for a moment, we're only connected by our most intimate parts.

 _Please. Move._

He waits until my eyes are on him before he pulls back, nearly all the way out, and enters just as slowly.

 _Oh my god. It feels so magical_.

He continues his slow, sweet, lovemaking pace, and I met him thrust for thrust as I flex my hips up to meet him.

"You." He pants out after awhile. "On top. I want to see you."

I let out a tiny squeal when he suddenly flips us, without pulling out, so I'm on top of him.

With nowhere to hold onto so I don't inadvertently touch him, I grab the headboard of the bed as I ride him, continuing with the slow pace he has set.

"Oh god!" I moan loudly at the sudden friction our bodies are causing. It's deep this way.

My movements are now faster than his were before as I now have more, if not all, the control. We're both moaning and panting as I grind on him. His hands roam my body, grabbing my breasts, sliding down my stomach to hold my hips, up my back, continuing to move and fondle every inch of my body. I throw my head back as we continue our lovemaking, my hair falling onto his thighs.

When he pulls me down to kiss me, my hands fist his hair. _Soft, so soft_. My nipples are now rubbing against his muscular bare chest as I hold myself up on my elbows. I'm so close, and when he moves his hands down to my ass to force me to grind harder, I think I may combust.

He moans a deep animalistic growl when I tug his hair.

"Cum with me." He pants out, between moans, against my mouth.

"Chr-Chri-Christian." I pant out his name as best as I can as my climax hits at an all time high.

So I don't pull his hair out completely, I move my hands to the sheets, fisting them.

I'm clawing at the sheets now as wave after wave hits me with full force.

I continue to move, desperate for this feeling to last as long as possible.

"Stay with me." I hear him from far away.

"Ana." The emotion pouring from him makes me cum again, this time with him.

When I finally come down from my high, my forehead is resting against his. I'm barely holding myself up on my elbows. I don't want touch him completely, however, my arms are about to give out, there's no avoiding it.

"Christian." I breathe to tell him, but I can't get anymore out.

He removes his hands from my ass to grab my hips and pulls out of me. He maneuvers us so we're laying on our sides, my back to his front.

At what I thought was the end of our lovemaking, was only the beginning.

He reaches around to play with my clit, while kissing my neck, and soon we go for round two.

By the time we've finished round three, I'm completely spent and sensitive.

I feel, rather than see, him pull the bedding up to cover us, then he pulls me to him. His front to my back and his arms around me, holding me to him. I can't help but smile. _Cuddling._ I snuggle closer and play with the soft hair on his strong sexy forearm as I let my thoughts run away with me.

Making love.

It was so unbelievably good. I've never made love before and neither has he. It was everything I've ever dreamed it would be and more. More...

 _Is this more? Making love?_

I turn around in his arms to look at the beautiful man behind me, only to find him sleeping. He looks so much younger and carefree, less stressed, when he's sleeping. So vulnerable and exposed. I take this rare opportunity to look at him. Beautiful. Peaceful. Haunted.

 _Do you think he would run if I told him my secret?_

I carefully peel myself away from him since I'm not tired and have a surprising amount of energy all of a sudden. I'm not sure why.

I don't have any of my clothes in here, except the dress I wore to the Mile High for lunch, and I don't want to put that back on. So I hunt in his drawers, getting out a T-shirt and a pair of his boxer briefs that look more like boxers on me than briefs.

After I'm dressed, I pad towards the kitchen.

It's Christian's birthday and regardless if he wants to celebrate it or not, he deserves a cake.

I remember Mrs. Jones, his house manager, saying Christian loves chocolate so I find everything I need and begin to bake him a chocolate cake for his birthday.

After I put the cake in the oven, I start on the icing.

This kitchen is a dream to work in. It's all state-of-the-art, fully stocked, and beautiful, with breathtaking views of the city.

I'm starting to feel tired now.

As soon as the cake is finished baking, I have to let it cool before I can frost it, so I walk back to Christian's room and climb back into bed with my sleeping _Fifty_ and drift myself for nap.

 _ **~..~..~**_

I wake feeling something pressed against my lips, and when I blink open my eyes, I see Christian.

"Wake up, Sleeping Beauty, we have to leave shortly."

I notice he's dressed and ready to go somewhere.

"Oh, for dinner with your parents." I remember, disoriented from waking.

"Yes."

"I just have to frost your cake and then I'll leave."

"Cake?" His face lights up like a little boy at Christmas, or birthday would be the better phrase here since it is his birthday.

"Mm-hm. I made you a chocolate cake while you were sleeping to take to your parents house tonight, to celebrate your birthday. I hope you don't mind." I say, remembering how angry he got when I tried to talk about his birthday at the Mile High club.

"Chocolate?" He grins.

I nod, wary of his reaction.

"It's my favorite." His grin turns megawatt, blinding, beautiful.

"Good." I say even though it was hinted to me. "I'll frost it for you then I'll go."

"Dress casual." He gives the side of my ass a playful slap as he stands. "It's not a big fancy thing, just family."

"I'm sorry, what?"

"You're coming with me. I want you to meet my parents."

"What?!"

 ** _~..~..~_**

"Christian, are you sure about this?" I ask nervously as I cling to the cake I made in the glass container like it's a life preserver while we climb the front steps of his parents home in Bellevue.

Thank god Christian bought me beautiful designer dresses and heels, so I don't feel completely out of my league here.

I never thought I would be that girl who changes into outfit after outfit, trying to find the perfect one, but I was today. I've changed so many times, until Christian finally put an end to it, dragging me out of the apartment in whatever I had on last, saying I was beautiful. I'm not sure his opinion counts, he said I would look beautiful in a burlap sack. That's just not possible.

I'm wearing a beautiful cocktail dress with matching stilettos, and I tried to put my hair in an elegant up-do as best as I could. My makeup is light, and I feel as good as I look, but that doesn't stop my nerves. I'm meeting his parents! His _freaking_ parents!

"I'm absolutely positive." He says as he opens the door with his hand on my lower back. "Don't worry, they'll love you."

I look around the house in awe. House is too small a word, mansion best describes this place. I saw the outside when I was here for the charity event and thought it was a beautiful home, but the inside... I have no words.

"Christian's here!" I hear a young girl squeal and the next thing I see is Mia, _his sister_ , rushing down the hall only to suddenly stop when she sees me.

"Hi." I squeak at the girl I stupidly assumed to be his wife, but is actually his sister.

"Oh. My. God. Oh my god!" She squeals more excited than before, if that's possible, and jumps around in place a bit before she runs toward us at full speed.

Christian takes the cake from me just before Mia crashes into me like a linebacker for the Seattle Seahawks, hugging me tight like we're long lost friends and she hasn't seen me in years. I'm surprised she didn't tackle me to the ground.

"Ana?" She pulls back from our hug, holding me at arms length, grinning like the Cheshire Cat.

I'm awed that she remembered my name from the gala. We barely spoke, only long enough for her to ask me to help with the first dance auction because someone didn't show up and tell me her name is Mia. She spoke a mile a minute and I found myself nodding and agreeing to anything she said, worried she would stop breathing if she stopped talking. I'm surprised I was able to tell her my name is Ana.

"Hi." I repeat.

"What are you doing here?!" She glances at her brother, still grinning. "With Christian?"

"It's his birthday." I dumbly explain like it should be evident why I'm here. "I brought a cake."

"Oh!" She looks at the cake that Christian is still holding. "Let's take it to the kitchen."

She grabs the cake with one hand and me with her other giving a halfhearted 'come on', and starts to walk away without another word.

I look back at Christian for help but he's just smiling and shaking his head.

"Hello to you too, Mia." Christian chuckles as he calls to her.

Mia lets me go and rushes back to her _brother_ , to kiss his cheek. She whispers something in his ear and I catch _'everything'_ but I didn't hear what she said before that. Then she comes back to me and leads me to a beautiful kitchen.

If I thought Christian's kitchen was beautiful, it was because I haven't seen this one yet. _Wow!_

"So... How long have you and my brother been together?" She asks as she sets the cake on the counter.

"Oh, um." I frown when I realize it really hasn't been that long. "We met a few weeks ago."

"He's never brought a girl home before. Our mother will be overjoyed." She squeals, grabbing my hand, leading me through the house and to the dining room.

I just now remember he's told me he's never brought a girl home to meet his family and his family thinks he's gay. Not that there's anything wrong with that, but I bet his family will be surprised to see he has a girl on his arm tonight.

When we walk in the huge dining room, everyone is seated at the table.

The sophisticated older gentleman that had lunch with Christian whom I assumed was thé Mr. Grey of GEH, is sitting at on end of the table. Elliot, whom I assumed was my date yesterday instead of Kate's, is sitting on a side with an empty chair next to him. A sandy haired woman whom looks like an angel, thankfully I haven't assumed anything about her yet, is sitting at the other end of the table, opposite of Mr. Grey. And a woman in her late 40s with a blonde bob, sitting next to Christian.

"Mia," Dr. Grey, I presume, says. Thankfully Christian gave me a quick biography of his family on the drive over, though he left the blonde out of the equation so I'm unsure who she is. Perhaps an aunt. "You didn't mention bringing a friend, dear."

"Oh, she's not here for me." Mia is grinning and bouncing with barely contained excitement. "This is Ana. She's _Christian's_ girlfriend."

"Girlfriend?!" I squeak at her, then look horrified at Christian, but he looks amused.

"Girlfriend?!" Dr. Grey joins my squeaking.

"Girlfriend?!" The blonde screeches, nearly spilling her wine.

Elliot just laughs at us, and Mr. Grey, his father, stands.

"It's nice to meet you young lady." He holds his hand out to me, not seeming surprised at all, but then again he must have saw the way I was looking at his son in the café the day Christian and I coincidentally ran into each other. That's where he probably assumes we officially met.

"Anastasia Steele," I give him my name as I shake his hand. "And it's lovely to meet you as well, Mr. Grey."

"Please, call me, Carrick."

"Elliot." Dr. Grey blindly paws his shoulder as she stands, smiling at me like I just cured everything imaginable. "Get an extra chair for your brother's... _girlfriend_." She grins the word as she makes her way to me.

"He's finally found someone." She gushes as I am wrapped in her warm arms, giving me a motherly hug, and it feels so good to hug her back.

When I feel Christian snake his arm around my waist, knowing it's him because it always feels as if a currant is being passed through our bodies when we touch and I don't know why but it's only happened with Christian, I pull away from Dr. Grey.

I look up at him to gage his mood but he still seems amused.

"Let's not frighten her away, mother."

"Christian, stop teasing." Dr. Grey scolds him.

"Well, since Mia so graciously introduced my family to you, Anastasia, this is my mother, Grace. My father Carrick. And you've met Elliot and my _sister,_ Mia." I can hear the way he stresses Mia's his sister.

"It's lovely to meet you, Dr. Grey. Or is it Dr. Trevelyan-Grey?" I ask, remembering what Christian said on the car ride over and from what I saw in the article Kate showed me yesterday. Maybe he said she goes by Dr. Trevelyan? I don't remember, I was too nervous.

"Grace, dear. And you have no idea how lovely it is to meet you."

I smile at her.

"You two can sit over here." Elliot calls everyone's attention away from me.

He walks around the table, sitting on the opposite side he was on, that now has three chairs.

Everyone goes back to their seats as Christian leads me to the side of the table with two chairs, helping me sit near his mother, then sitting next to me.

When everyone is finally seated, I look up to be met with dark blue eyes.

"Oh, Ana, dear, this is my good friend, Elena. Elena, this is Christian's girlfriend."

Dr. Grey introduces us, and I realize she's the only one that did not stand to greet me. _Strange._

"Yes, I can see that." She says quiet and politely.

She doesn't look pleased as she takes a sip of her wine, all but glaring at me over the rim.

 _Why is she looking at me like that?_

"So how long have you two been together?" Christian's mother asks us bringing me from my thoughts of the cougar sitting across from me.

"Since the café?" His father ask, with a wink towards his son, causing me to giggle.

"I think I can answer that." Elliot speaks up, boasting, before Christian or I can answer, looking confident with the answer that he too would not know.

"Yesterday." _See. He doesn't know either._ "I hooked them up on a blind date. I should make a career out of being a match maker."

"Actually, Elliot," Christian corrects his brother. "Anastasia and I met about a month ago."

"A month?!" All the Grey's ask in surprised.

 _Has it really been a month?_ I guess it doesn't feel that way since I stupidly let someone convince me that he was married and left him for nearly a week and then we didn't officially met face-to-face until a week after we started chatting.

"Where?" Elliot asks disappointed that he didn't 'hook us up'.

"Why didn't you bring her to the Coping Together charity event, darling?" Grace asks.

"She was there." Both Mia and Elliot tell their mother absentmindedly.

"Why are you just now introducing us if we've been together a month?" Mia asks.

I stay quiet unsure of how much to say.

"We met online about a month ago and ran into each other coincidently a few days after at the café, unknowingly, and met in person about a week after we started talking online. We were just friends at the time of the Coping Together gala, and when we doubled with Elliot and Anastasia's roommate yesterday, we agree to give it a go, so I decided to bring her here tonight to introduce you to her and she to you." Christian says so smoothly.

"So you met on an online dating site?" I sputter my wine a bit when Mia asks this.

"I wouldn't say that." I mumble under my breath, behind my wine glass. Only Christian hears me and smirks as he pats my back.

Soon the dinning room door opens and a girl with blonde pigtails enters carrying a tray of plates.

When she begins to serve I realize she's hired help. Gosh, I'm really out of my element here.

I notice Ms. Blonde Pigtails keeps looking at Christian under her lashes as she blushes and continues to serve everyone.

"Thank you, Gretchen" Grace says sweetly.

Ms. Blonde Pigtails nods, and with another glance at Christian, she leaves.

"Everything okay." I hear Christian murmur in my ear, I didn't even realize I was scowling.

"Everything's fine." I bite my lip when I look at him, and squirm when I see his eyes darken with desire.

"Don't bite your lip, Anastasia, not here." He murmurs huskily.

"Why not?"

"Because I want to do that, and I can't right now."

I swallow hard at the thought of him biting my lip, then blush, embarrassed, at the thought of him biting my lip in front of his family.

"There's a boathouse on the property, Anastasia, if you continue to look so divine," He whispers in my ear so no one can hear, his dark eyes roaming up and down my body discreetly. "I may just take you there."

My eyes widen at his bold statement and blush an even darker shade. _His parents are at the freaking table for goodness sake!_

"What are you two whispering about over there?" Mia inquires from across the table.

"You really wanna know?" Christian smirks and gives his brows a little wiggle, playfully.

"Oh my god. No!"

"You're quite playful this evening, Christian."

"I can't help it." He kisses my temple, and goes back to his meal.

I blush scarlet red when everyone at the table is starring at me with wonder, so I keep my head down and eat.

It's not like his family doesn't know he has sex and that we have sex, since we're both adults in a consensual relationship, however, he did say his family doesn't know about how he enjoys sex. Why would they?

Okay, I seriously need to stop thinking about Christian and sex with his parents in the same room.

We all begin eating as the conversation continues around the table, mostly centered around me.

I feel slightly uncomfortable as I tell them about my mid-class life and parents compared to their lavish lifestyle, but they don't look down on me in any way. They seem very down to earth. They, as well as Christian, now know about my father, Ray, who lives in Montesano and my mother, Carla, who lives in Georgia with her husband.

Everyone is interested in Christian's new girlfriend and takes turns asking me questions. Everyone except Elena who hasn't said so much as her _girlfriend_ screech just as surprised as his family that he has a girlfriend, and her whispered, _yes, I can see that_. I'm not sure why she's not speaking, not just to me but she's not speaking to anyone. Nobody seems to notice this as unusual so maybe she's naturally quiet, or they are too intrigued with Christian's 'girlfriend' to notice.

After we've finished eating, Mia and I go to the kitchen to get the cake I made for Christian.

I don't think he'd like the traditional 'happy birthday to you' to be sung to him so we slice the cake, putting pieces on plates with forks and bring them to the dining room.

I notice Christian and Elena are gone when we return.

Grace tells us Elena had to leave, and Christian went to the restroom, so I place Christian's plate down for him, for when he returns, which isn't long.

As soon as he returns to the table, we begin to eat the chocolate cake.

"This is delicious, Ana." Grace compliments.

"Thank you."

Throughout eating the cake, Christian seems more relaxed than he was during dinner and even more relaxed than yesterday's double date.

He's constantly touching me the whole time. His hand on my thigh, but not in the possessive way he did to show Chad who I belong to. His hand lazily around my shoulder as he chats with his father and brother about baseball. Or even just holding my hand.

It's so nice to see him this relaxed.

After we've finish eating his birthday cake, Christian is ready to leave, so we say our goodbyes in the foyer of the home.

I am embraced by every Grey.

"I do hope we see you again very soon, Ana." Grace takes me in her motherly arms again.

"Goodbye, Ana." Christian's father says.

"That cake was delicious, Banana." Elliot wraps me in his arms, but feminine hands quickly pull me from him and soon I am wrapped in another pair of arms.

"We never thought he'd find anyone." Mia gushes in my ear as she hugs me.

"Alright, let's not show her too much affection." Christian says as he takes me back by his side, holding me to him.

"Oh, Christian, stop it." Grace scolds him lightly.

"Yeah, we're just so happy for you." Mia agrees.

"Au revoir." Christian says politely.

"Goodbye." I wave at all the Greys as Christian leads me outside and to the SUV where Taylor is waiting.

 _Has he been waiting here this whole time?_

"Seems my family adores you, too." Christian comments once we're seated inside his SUV.

 _Too? Does that mean Christian... adores me?_ He did say he would be devoted to me if I was his, and I am his. _Completely his._

I gaze at him, trying to determine what this all means. His family said he's never brought a girl home before and at 28 that's a little weird.

 _Why didn't he correct his family when they assumed I was his girlfriend? He could have told them we were just friends._

Is this... _more?_

 _Do I ask Christian? Should I ask Christian?_

The warning Stephanie, his ex-Sub, gave me comes unbidden and very unwelcome into my head as Taylor begins to drive.

"What?" He asks seeing me deep in thought.

"I liked your family, too. You speak French?" I decide to ask Christian instead of what this means; me meeting his family and them assuming I am his girlfriend.

 _Well, he didn't correct them, Ana!_

"Yes. My mother had a motto when it came to her children. Foreign language, martial art, and musical instrument."

"So you speak French and play the piano..." I list what I know.

"And I kickbox. I have a personal trainer that I workout with every weekday."

"Oh yeah." I remember him saying something like that when we discussed our contract.

So that's how he stays in such great shape.

I decide to go ahead and ask him what this all means, but I don't want to phrase it wrong.

"Christian..." I trail off. "Your... your family thinks... They think I'm..."

"I know," He says knowing what I'm talking about; them assuming I am his girlfriend. "I apologize for that. I couldn't correct them, they seemed thrilled and overly happy about it. I didn't want to disappoint them, so I just went along with it. Don't worry about it. This doesn't change our relationship."

 _Oh._ I try not to frown at this.

That's right, he doesn't do the 'girlfriend' thing. And I guess it would be kind of hard to explain our weird relationship to his family. But he could have told them we are just friends. I'm sure they would suspect we're 'more than friends' by the way Christian was acting during dessert. And I certainly wouldn't want to disappoint them by telling them I'm not his girlfriend.

Christian reaches for my hand, brings it to his lips and kisses my knuckles, then he moves my hand to his crotch so I can feel his erection, easily distracting me of my thoughts of his family thinking I'm his girlfriend and him saying he doesn't do the girlfriend thing.

I gasp and blush as I look towards Taylor.

"Don't worry about Taylor." He whispers in a husky tone. "I want you, Anastasia. I need to be inside you."

"Oh god." I breathe heavily.

I'm instantly turned on, but surely we wouldn't do anything in the back of the car with Taylor driving!

"Don't worry," He laughs at my sudden embarrassment. "We'll stick to a bed."

 _What bed, who's bed_ , I want to ask, but I keep quiet.

"My bed." He answers my unasked question like he heard my question.

We've had more vanilla sex than kinky Playroom sex. This started with me wanting kinky fun sex, but any sex with Christian is mind-blowing, especially lovemaking sex. How can it not be?

He said he never made love before, he never even had sex in his bed, he's never slept with anyone, he's never brought a girl to meet his folks, he's never given up control outside the Playroom. He's letting his family think I'm his girlfriend for goodness sake.

Is this all the _more_ that Stephanie was talking about? I'm _really_ glad I got her number because I need to talk to her. Now more than ever. I would talk to Christian, but she said if I mention _more,_ he will terminate my contract and that is the last thing I want.

Maybe I'll just enjoy this more, and not ask him for more, since he's giving me more. Okay, that's a lot of _'more'_ talk.

* * *

Christian and I enjoyed each other last night. He still didn't want us sleeping together, but after we returned from his parents it was already so late. Combine that with the amazing sex, we both fell into a deep exhausted sleep and I ended up staying in bed with him all night, waking with his arms wrapped around me like a vine, and morning sex.

We ate breakfast, lunch, and dinner together with sex in-between each meal. Playroom sex, vanilla sex, sex in his room, sex in the media room, sex, sex, sex.

It's now late and time for me to leave.

I really, really do not want to go home, but it is a work day tomorrow and Kate has messaged me asking if I was coming home tonight. I've been gone all weekend and I had planned to spend some of it with her since it was her first weekend home, however, I've ended up spending the whole weekend with Christian.

We wont see each other next weekend due to his business trip, so I'm trying to make our goodbye last as long as possible.

"I don't want you to go." Christian murmurs against my lips as we make out in the Escala parking garage.

My arms freely around his neck, his around my waist, while I lean against my car.

"It's a weekday tomorrow." I remind him.

"I don't care. I want you to stay."

"Christian," I pull away from him, giggling. "I have to go, and you're not making it easy for me. I only have my weekend clothes here, which are basically just panties."

Although I do have the clothes Christian bought me. No, I have to go home, it's Sunday and I have work in the morning.

"That works for me." He grins his sexy megawatt smile at me.

"Really?" I ask unbelieving. "So you don't mind if your employees show up to work in their sexy lingerie."

"Well..." He pretends to think. "It is a way to get a rise out of me."

"You mean a raise?"

"A rise." He pushes his hardening dick toward me, proving his point.

"Christian." I giggle at him. "You're so naughty. And nobody better be giving you that kind of rise, except me."

"Only you, baby." He kisses me sweetly again.

"Mmm." I groan in protest when I pull away, not wanting it to end. "I have to go. Maybe I'll stay with you another night during the week."

"Promise?" His beautiful face lights up.

"Promise." And I will be using the clothes from that wardrobe too.

"I'll call you when I return from Portland so we can play this weekend, if you're available. I should return by Sunday morning, but I'll try to make it home by Saturday night."

"Call or text when you arrive in Portland as well, so I know you made it safely."

He blinks like he can't believe what I said.

"What?" I ask him, confused by his look.

"Nothing." He shakes his head as if to clear it.

"I'm going now, okay."

"Alright." He murmurs, kissing me one last time before I get into my car.

I blow him a kiss, wave, then drive away.

 _ **~..~..~**_

When I walk into our apartment, Kate is home and is sitting on our sofa, reading some paperwork that I assume to be something work related.

"How did your date go?" I ask Kate, remembering she was going to see Elliot today.

As I walk closer to her, that's when I notice she found her bag that she wanted to use for her date with Elliot today.

Her bag that I borrowed.

The bag I borrowed when I met with Christian at Escala and discussed our BDSM contract with him.

The contract that is now in Kate's hands.

"Ana." She says my name with worry. "What the fuck is this?"

 _Shit!_

* * *

 **A/N: _I know some will ask so I wanted to clear it up.  
Anastasia does not know or suspect Elena is Mrs. Robinson because Christian never told Anastasia the bitch-troll's name in this story._**

* * *

 ** _A lot of mixed reviews for the last chapter. Some loved it, some not so much.  
_** ** _But the majority of those who didn't like it was due to Anastasia talking with one of Christian's ex-Subs._**

 ** _This is actually a common thing in a BDSM relationship; to speak with previous partners._** ** _  
_** _ **In this story, at this point in their relationship, they are only in a BDSM Dom/Sub relationship.**_

 _ **Christian offered Anastasia to speak with one of his previous Subs because she's only been enlightened by Dominants.  
Anastasia agreed because she's intrigued with the lifestyle.  
(hence, why she was on the BDSM website & tried again, with Christian as her Dom.)**_

 _ **As for Christian leaving them alone to talk.**_  
 _ **What could she possibly tell Ana? His Subs weren't close to him & didn't 'know' him. **_  
_**She's just telling Ana about being a Sub from a Sub's perspective/point of view.**_

 _ **As this story's summary explains: She's exploring the lifestyle.**_

 _ **It's obvious to those who read this story that Anastasia & Christian are feeling 'more' for each other than they are willing to admit, so I understand why this part of the story would feel 'wrong' or 'weird' because in more conventional relationships this doesn't happen.**_

 ** _With that being said, I hope you are enjoying this story & continue to enjoy.  
_**


	18. (18) No One Can Know

**APOV**

When I walk into our apartment, Kate is home and is sitting on our sofa, reading some paperwork that I assume to be something work related.

"How did your date go?" I ask Kate, remembering she was going to see Elliot today.

As I walk closer to her, that's when I notice she found her bag that she wanted to use for her date with Elliot today.

Her bag that I borrowed.

The bag I borrowed when I met with Christian at Escala and discussed our BDSM contract with him.

The contract that is now in Kate's hands.

"Ana." She says my name with worry. "What the fuck is this?"

 _Shit!_

"Wh-"

"Is Christian Grey... Is he your Dominant?" She asks interrupting me, not that I know what to say.

"What?!" I squeak.

 _Why would she think Christian?!_ The contract doesn't have our names on it and we didn't sign it.

"What has he done to you?!" Her green eyes are so full of concern, as she finally looks at me.

"Kate." I can help but to roll my eyes. Chad was right, people do see it as 'wrong' and don't understand it.

I don't know what to say. I try to come up with something as I sit next to her.

"Ana, don't lie to me. I'm worried about you. Chains and whips," She shakes her head, not understanding. "I thought that was just a fun kinky song. I'm not naïve enough to not know this kinky freaky shit doesn't happen, but I never expected you to be involved with it. Is he hurting you? Do you need help?"

"What makes you think Christian Grey is my Dominant?" Is the only thing my brain can think of to ask.

"Well, I can't imagine you as a Dominant and he is very controlling and domineering. This contract and the NDA." She holds them up to show me as evidence, further proving that she's right about Christian being a BDSM Dominant.

"Kate, Christian Grey is my boss. Every employee signs NDAs that work for him."

"Ana, I can tell that that man is more than your boss. You got upset when he showed up for our double date because you thought he was married, and then you took him to talk alone after you found out he wasn't married. You said you met a man named Christian online and he lives at Escala's penthouse apartment. I Googled Christian Grey and found out he lives in Escala's penthouse apartment, and my computer history has BDSM websites on it. It's not hard to put two and two together. So what gives, Steele?"

 _I knew she let it go too easy Friday night!_

I can't tell Kate that Christian is a Dominant in the BDSM lifestyle, NDA or not, so I do the only thing I can think of. I throw Chad under the bus.

"Chad is a BDSM Dominant."

Good thing Christian and I never signed the contract.

"Chad?! He's your Dominant?"

"No. He was, but I broke up with him."

"Because he did awful things to you?"

"NO!"

"Why didn't you tell me about Chad and this freaky kinky shit before?"

"It's personal, Kate." I may not have signed an NDA with Chad, but it's still my personal business.

"Where does Christian Grey fit into all this?"

 _Well, Christian told his family, surely I can give Kate the same excuse, right?_ I mean, Kate is dating his brother and his brother knows so it wouldn't be long until Kate found out through Elliot and then be pissed at me that I wasn't the one to tell her.

"I met him online about a month ago." I finally admit to knowing Christian Grey personally. "I was browsing BDSM sites using your computer, and happened across a match making type site using screen names, not real names, and we connected." There, not entirely a lie. "We met in person a week after we met online, and after the double date we decided to try for... _more_."

 _More._

"On a BDSM match making website?"

"No, Kate." I'm starting to get irritated with her view of the lifestyle.

"So you're really into this kinky shit?"

"Yes, it's very pleasurable." I sound like I'm either apologizing or defending the lifestyle that is so new to me.

"But it says your Dominant hits you."

"Pain can be very pleasurable." I insist, repeating what Christian said, and now I really do blush, remembering how pleasurable that pain was.

"Is Christian Grey a Dominant? I would never of guessed Garrett, but I can totally see Grey as a Dom."

"No." I lie surprisingly smoothly, I hope. "We just have kinky sex."

"You're such a good girl, Ana, I can't believe you of all people are into this kinky shit. I guess it really is the quiet ones you need to look out for."

"I don't need someone who sees the good girl in me. I need someone who sees the naughty me and still wants me."

"What ever happened to the girl who read romantic novels, daydreaming of her prince charming, white horses, and her happily ever after?"

"I still love to read fairy tales, they're just a littler _dirtier_ now."

"Ana, you freak." She says playfully. "Grey's lucky to find a girl who's a hopeless romantic with a dirty mind. A real freak in the sheets."

I just smile at Kate.

"So Garrett knows you and Grey are together? That's why he and Grey were having the testosterone rush at the restaurant Friday night? They didn't look very pleased during their stand-off. If Grey isn't a Dom and he can get a Dom to back off just like that... Mmm. He'd make one helluva Dominant."

I giggle.

 _He does_. I want to say, but I keep quiet.

"Yes, Chad knows about Christian and I, and Christian knows Chad is my ex."

"Why didn't you tell me about Grey?"

"I signed an NDA," Explaining as I point to it. "I couldn't, and shouldn't be telling you this now. Kate, no one can know about this. Christian likes his privacy, and I don't want GEH employees to know. You haven't told anyone, have you?"

"No, of course not." I didn't think she would and now I've offended her. "I just wanted to make sure you're okay."

"I'm okay. More than." I assure her.

"I'm sorry to pry, and you're right, it is personal and none of my business how you enjoy your sex, but I was so worried when I read this. I didn't know what to think. I canceled my date with Elliot and waited for you to come home and explain this to me. Your happiness is all that matters to me. Your happiness and safety."

"I've never been happier." I whisper almost afraid to admit it, afraid that it will all disappear if Christian found out. "And I'm completely safe. BDSM is consensual, Kate. Safe, Sane, and Consensual. Chad, never did _anything_ to me that I didn't ask him to do."

I don't mention the belting incident that broke us because even though I asked Chad to show me the worst, Kate would have his balls for earrings if she found out he hurt me, whether I asked for it and didn't stop him or not.

"This actually answers a question I've been wanting to know for quite awhile now about Christian Grey. No wonder his love life isn't broadcasted for all to see. He has his lovers sign NDAs, which is actually pretty smart on his part."

"Mm-hm." Christian doesn't have _lovers._ He has _Submissives._

"Wow," Kate grins. "You and thee Christian Grey."

"Yup." I don't know what else to say.

Since it's already so late and we both have work tomorrow, we go to bed with me promising to tell Kate more about the lifestyle another time.

I put the contract and the NDA in my top drawer of my side table, change into my pajamas, and lay on my bed.

I can't sleep. I lay awake and think of what this means, this _more_ with Christian.

He let his family think I am his girlfriend, but told me when I asked him about it, that our relationship will remain the same. No romance, no hearts and flowers. Yet we made love, and he lets his family assume we're in a romantic relationship? He's giving me all these mixed signals. Combined that with Stephanie's warning, and I'm so confused.

I obviously can't talk to Christian about this. I need to talk to Stephanie as she knows what it's like to be his Sub. I plan to call her tomorrow and hopefully meet up with her. Maybe we can have lunch during my break if she's free. I didn't get very much information from her and her really weird Submissive-hypnotized-self before Christian came out, but surely she can help me decipher this.

* * *

I still have twenty minutes until lunch so I'm trying busying myself, even though today is a slow day with not much work to be done.

I've already talked to Stephanie and she agreed to have lunch with me today so we can talk.

 _~RING~RING~RING~_

My office phone rings so I answer.

"Anastasia Steele, Grey Publishing. How may I help you?"

 _"Good afternoon, Ms. Steele."_ Comes the familiar voice. _"It's Taylor. I need to speak with you privately, ma'am. Would you come up to the 20th floor please?"_

"Oh, yeah. I'm sorry about ditching you Friday, I was running late." I look around to make sure none of my coworkers are listening in, and lower my voice. "Umm. Christian explained everything to me so I know now. About what we talked about." I try to hint about Christian's alleged marriage as this is what I suspect Taylor to be calling for since I told him I would talk to him on Monday and today is Monday.

 _"Yes, ma'am. This matter is pertaining to that and I need your help as only you can."_

"Oh, um. But I have plans for lunch today. Can it wait?"

 _"I'm afraid not, ma'am. I need you to come as soon as it's convenient for you. Now would be preferred."_

"Okay. We're slow anyway, so I'll let my editor know I'm leaving for lunch early, and reschedule my lunch plans."

 _"Just let Ms. Parker know you are here to see me, ma'am."_

"Umm. Ms. Parker?" _Who is Ms. Parker?_

 _"Mr. Grey's assistant, ma'am."_

"Okay, I'll be right up."

 _"Thank you, ma'am."_ He hangs up.

I wonder what this is about? Surely he knows Christian and I are back together since he greeted me Friday night when I came to Escala.

I knock on Martha's door and enter when she grants me permission.

"I was called to meet with um, someone on the 20th floor." I tell her the reason I need to leave, sounding completely unsure and lame. "I've been asked to go now, if that's alright."

"Yes, Ana, that's fine."

I walk out of her office and grab my phone and my bag.

I text Stephanie while I walk to the elevator to let her know I may be a little late for our lunch date today. Maybe I should just reschedule since I don't know how long I'll be with Taylor, or whatever he needs from me. And if I'm going to the 20th floor, maybe I can sneak to see Christian and convince him to have lunch with me today. Though I'm not sure how we can have lunch and not be seen together, but I'm sure he can figure something out like he did Saturday when he took me to the Mile High club.

 **Hi, Steph. I may need to reschedule our lunch meeting today. Something came up at work. -AS**

 _ **No problem. I can meet you tomorrow if that works better? -SA**_

While I don't _want_ to reschedule since I want to get to the bottom of the Dominant known as Christian Grey as soon as possible, I have to.

 **Tomorrow works for me. Hopefully nothing comes up. -AS**

 _ **Okay. Let me know if you need to reschedule tomorrow. If not I'll see you then. -SA**_

When the elevator reaches the 20th floor, I eye Christian's closed office door, wondering if he's in there and what he's doing as I walk to his assistant's desk.

She's beautiful polished blonde, typing feverishly on her computer, until she hears my heels clicking across the floor.

"Hello, may I help you?" She asks me, smiling politely.

"Yes, hello, my name is Anastasia Steele and Taylor..." _Shit!_ "Um. I'm sorry I don't know his last name. He's Christian's driver." I explain.

Before I can continue, her eyes widen. I just realize my mistake. I stupidly called Christian, by his given name.

Seems it's not only a Submissive golden rule, not to call their Master by his given name, but also the CEO of the company golden rule.

It's now that I remember my welcome email, insisting he only be referred to as, Mr. Grey or Sir.

And by me slipping and calling him Christian instead of Mr. Grey or Sir, I can only imagine what his assistant must be thinking.

 _Nice job, Ana!_

I curse my brain to mouth filter, as it must be broken.

"I mean, Mr. Grey." I quickly amend my mistake. "I'm here to see Taylor..." I trail off. _Damn it, now what is his last name?! Why don't I ever get peoples full names, ugh!_ "Taylor somebody, Mr. Grey's driver. Maybe it's Jones? Taylor Jones."

Mrs. Jones could have been Taylor's wife, right.

"Mr. Grey's driver?" She checks, like he doesn't have a driver.

"That's what he told me. He's Mr. Grey's driver and his name is Taylor but he didn't give me a last name, and he called me to come up just now. He wanted to speak with me, and told me to inform you when I arrived."

"One moment, please." She picks up her phone, back to her professional self.

"Good afternoon, sir. You have an Anastasia Steele here to see you. ... Yes, sir." She hangs up.

"Taylor will see you now." She stands from her desk smoothing her designer dress. "I'll show you to his office."

"Thank you."

We walk down a hall, just a short distance from Christian's office.

Ms. Parker gestures toward the door so I push it open, nearly tripping, but thankfully I remain upright.

Taylor's office looks more like a security office than an office for a driver.

I look around the room with CCTV monitors everywhere. I remember him telling me the conference room had a camera, that's how he knew what Christian and I were talking about that day. And finally my eyes land on Taylor, who stands from his desk.

I glance back when I hear the door shut, and then back to Taylor.

"Thank you for meeting me, Ms. Steele. Please." He gestures towards a chair in front of his desk so I sit.

"I hope it wasn't too much of an inconvenience for you." He says after he's sitting behind his desk again.

"Not at all, although you didn't give me your last name." It will be helpful in the future to know his last name.

"It's Taylor, ma'am."

"Oh. Taylor Taylor." _Interesting._

He chuckles like I'm joking.

"No, ma'am. Taylor is my last name. Jason Taylor."

"Oh." I giggle, remembering he's military and they usually use their last names.

"Are you really Christian's driver?" I ask skeptically, remembering Ms. Parker's surprise that I labeled him as such, although, that surprise may have been more that I labeled Christian as 'Christian' than Taylor his driver, but Taylor seems to be other than, or more than his driver.

"Yes, ma'am," He admits. "I am, as well as many other things. My main title is CPO." He explains.

"CPO? Like a cop?"

"No, ma'am," He smiles a rare smile. "More like personal security."

"That makes more sense than the driver."

 _Why wouldn't he just say he's Christian's security when we met instead of saying he's his driver?_

"I'd like to get right down to business, ma'am." He picks up a paper from his desk, holding it. "Mr. Grey told me about the woman who approached you at the charity event and wants me to find out who it was." He explains the reason I'm here.

"Okay. How can I help?"

"I believe I know who it was, I just need more information from you."

"Okay. I'll try."

"Are you sure she was a brunette in her 30s?"

"Well, she was wearing a mask, but I believe I saw a hint of brown through the head piece she wore. And I couldn't really see her face through her thick full mask. I assumed she was in her 30s or 40s, but with the mask, I can be certain."

"Have you seen this woman before?" He hands me the paper which turns out to be a photo that looks more like a headshot of Elena, Dr. Grey's friend.

"Yes, I met her at the Grey's on Saturday when Christian and I went there for his birthday."

"Was she the woman that approached you at the gala?"

"I don't think so." I hand the photo back to him. "I would have told Christian Saturday, and Dr. Grey's friend looks older than the woman who came into the restroom."

"She's in her late 40s, early 50s, and has platinum blonde hair." He agrees with me.

 _Wow, that woman sure looks good for being in her 50s!_ Must be plastic surgery.

"But she's the only one at the gala that knows of Mr. Grey's... extra curricular activities." My eyes widen at his suggestion.

 _Taylor knows?!_ Christian said his staff only know what he tells them. Why would Taylor _need_ to know this?

"She's the only one who would know Mr. Grey was in a relationship, and I believe she sees you as a threat."

She knows what Christian enjoys... _Is she Mrs. Robinson?!_

 _Christian's mother's friend is Mrs. fucking Robinson?! Are you fucking kidding me right now?! His mother's friend?!_

"Would you know who approached you in the restroom if you heard them again?"

"Yes, I think so, but I heard Elena speak at the Grey's on Saturday, and I didn't recognize her voice."

"I suspect she altered her voice."

She didn't speak much and used a low tone so it is possible.

"I'd like to play some footage, however, I don't want to cloud your judgment so I'm not going to show you who's speaking. I just want you to listen and tell me if you believe it's the woman from the gala that approached you."

"Okay."

He pushes a few buttons and soon I hear someone speaking.

 _"Will there be anything else, Mr. Grey?"_

I shake my head. That's not the voice I heard, it sounds like Ms. Parker.

 _"Y-your coffee, M-mr. Grey."_

I shake my head again. I don't even recognize the stuttering husky voice.

 _"Am I disturbing something?"_

"Yes. That's the woman who approached me and said Christian was in a committed relationship, suggesting he was married."

"As I suspected." He nods.

"It's her, isn't it."

"Yes, ma'am, the woman who approached you was Ms. Lincoln."

 _Huston, I have a last name for Mrs. Robinson. Elena Lincoln_.

 _Ugh, did her last name really have to be Lincoln?!_

"She must have worn a wig to hide her signature platinum blonde bob, along with a head piece. And the botox can explain why you assumed she's younger than she is, along with the full mask."

"We have to tell Christian." I insist, sitting on the edge of my seat.

"I will, ma'am. Ms. Lincoln is scheduled to meet with Mr. Grey today. According to his schedule, she just arrived."

"I want to tell him."

"With all due respect, ma'am-"

"No." I cut him off. "If you tell him that I said it's her, it's just I said, she said. If I tell him, with her present no less, she can't deny it."

"I'll need to be in the room at all times, but that could work."

"Great. Well, if she's here now, let's go." I keep my purse in his security room and stand, with Taylor following.

Together we walk to Christian's office.

I admit, I'm extremely nervous about this, as this can go either way. He could continue to defend a pedophile, like he's already done before, since she's brainwashed him for years. Or believe me; some random Sub that doesn't want a total control relationship and he's only known for about a month.

Taylor gives Ms. Parker a nod, I'm not sure why, perhaps to allow us to enter or to give the okay for me to enter the CEO's office without the CEO's permission, but I open the door and walk in anyway, with Taylor right behind me.

I don't know what Taylor is doing behind me, but I hear the door shut so I know he's in the room with me.

My eyes go straight to Christian. He looks incredibly sexy in CEO-mode sitting behind his desk.

I can see the back of Elena fucking Pedo's head too as she sits across from him.

When they hear the door, they both look towards it. At first Christian scowls and opens his mouth, probably to snap at who dared to enter his office unannounced, but then he looks confused when he sees it's me. And Mrs. Robinson looks at me with wide eyes that quickly turns into a scowl before she looks back towards Christian.

"Anastasia," Christian stands, smiling at me. "To what do I owe this surprise?"

"I just thought you should know something about your _friend_." I tell him when he reaches me, kissing my cheek.

 _Let her try and crawl her way out of this one!_

* * *

 **A/N: _I know, I know, another cliffhanger..._  
 _Kudos to those 99% who knew it was Elena at the charity event._  
**

* * *

 ** _Can I just do a huge shout out to all you readers/reviewers! You all are amazing!  
From new readers who have just discovered me & readers who have followed me since my first story, to readers who found me in-between. _**

**_Sandie, whoever you are, thanks for the encouragement to continue writing, as well as all you loyal fans.  
_** ** _I can't believe this fanfic is doing_ better _than my story_ Enough _did at this point when_ Enough** _ **was at chapter 18.  
**_

 ** _Every time you review, Sandie, it lets me know I'm doing something right.  
That my stories are intriguing enough to capture your attention, and you continue to follow, read, and review.  
I appreciate the time you take out of your busy day to read and review my stories. _:)**

 ** _Thank you_ everyone _for reading & reviewing!  
_**


	19. (19) Exchange Of Power

**CPOV**

Everything has been going well with Anastasia and I, since I got her back. We've been in the Playroom, and even enjoyed vanilla all weekend. I never thought I would enjoy vanilla. I never fucking thought I would make love, for fuck's sake, but there's something about her, I can't explain it.

She's even slept with me, starting Friday night when she snuck into my room, and again Saturday when we napped together after making love, then Saturday night. At first I thought it was a fluke, that I wasn't having nightmares, but now I think it's because I was exhausted. That's surely a logical explanation, right? I mean, I've never taken a nap during the day before so that must be it.

Since her roommate is beating down my brother's door, Anastasia will have nothing else to do on the weekends but to play with me, and I don't mind playing with her at all. It just fucking sucks I have a business trip to Portland this weekend, however, it's not that far from Seattle so I plan to wrap it up as soon as possible, hopefully Saturday night instead of Sunday morning.

I'm pleased our arrangement will more than likely move to every weekend, since her roommate is busy with my brother. What I not thrilled about is Sunday fucking nights when she returns home. Yesterday was the first Sunday she had to leave, and I'm already dreading the next time she's to leave again. Perhaps we can work in a weekday thing as well.

I'm so fed up with Elena and her bullshit that I'm gifting her the salons. It's the least I could do for her, after everything she's done for me, but I've had enough. I don't know what the fuck her problem is; first she doesn't find me a Submissive for months, she tries to touch me inappropriately at my parents' Coping Together charity event, then she's acting like a bitch during my birthday dinner at my parents' house Saturday.

I've already had my legal team go through everything, all that's needed is our signatures. I've already emailed Elena and she sent me a confirmation email that she will met me today. In fact, she's scheduled to arrive shortly.

I'm getting the paperwork ready as I wait for her arrival.

 _~FLASHBACK~_

 _I'm not sure why the fuck Elena was being so quiet during dinner, she had to be just as shocked as my family to learn I have a girlfriend, thanks to Mia and her assuming big mouth. I found it amusing though, that my family was all over Anastasia like she was the last drink of water in a desert, just because Mia said she was my girlfriend._

 _If I thought this was all it took to make them happy, I would have done this sooner. No, that's not true. I never felt the need to introduce any of my other Submissives to my family. It just felt wrong if they ever found out. Anastasia's different. She's... normal._

 _After Anastasia and Mia left the room to get the chocolate cake that Anastasia made for my birthday, I saw the look Elena was giving me. I've seen it all too many times before, it's the look she gives me when she wants to discuss something privately._

 _I excuse myself with the pretext of using the restroom. Then I wait in our usual spot that we would talk when I was her Sub; near the boathouse. It's far enough away from the house and we'll be able to hear or see anyone coming in time to stop conversing._

 _"What?" I snap as soon as I see her coming._

 _"What do you mean, what?" She continues to walk towards me until she's standing in front of me. "A girlfriend, Christian? Really? Since when have you gone all hearts and flowers. You know that romantic bullshit is just that, bullshit, and now you have a girlfriend?! Love is for fools, darling, I've told you enough times. Why on earth do you have a girlfriend?"_

 _"She's not my girlfriend. I just let my family assume that. What was I supposed to do, correct them by telling them we're in a BDSM relationship?"_

 _"Well, why have you brought the girl here in the first place, Christian?"_

Why did I? I've never felt the need to before, but I wanted my family to meet Anastasia, and I wanted her to meet my family.

 _"I don't have to explain myself to you." I say simply._

 _"Christian, this is not like you, you've never brought a girl home before, why this one?"_

 _"What I do and what I choose to do is no longer your concern. Any relationship I enter into is none of your business and what I do with that relationship is between me and my partner, not you. You should know this by now, Elena."_

 _"Why so hostile, darling? I'm your friend."_

 _"I know." She's right, I don't know why I'm being so defensive of my relationship with Anastasia._

 _"Darling, are you sure this girl is right for you? She has you doing things you wouldn't normally do. I think you should end the contract."_

 _"No. I'm not ending things with her."_

Absolutely not. I just got her back and those 6 days we were apart were excruciating _._

 _"Susannah called me today asking if you were looking to renew her contract."_

 _I stay quiet, not giving her the information she's inquiring about, as I stay impassive._

 _I called Susannah before I called Stephanie, however, Susannah did not answer so I moved on, being sure to avoid those obsessed with me._

 _Elena has gotten every Sub for me, Anastasia being the exception, so naturally Susannah would call Elena since I didn't leave a message. My ex-Subs are not allowed to contact me after our contract has ended. Even if I call them first, they are to wait for my call back, if I choose to call them again, and I never called Susannah back since Stephanie answered._

 _And I'm not telling Elena that Anastasia is new to the lifestyle, as that's the reason I called my previous Subs. Elena already thinks Anastasia is changing me, she'd laugh if she found out Anastasia isn't an actual Submissive or a masochist. I could only imagine what Elena would think if I told her Anastasia and I made love._ Fuck! _She's-_

 _"Looking for a new Sub already?" Elena brings me from my thoughts._ _I know she's trying to goad me._ _"You know I can help you with that."_

 _"I don't need a new Sub. I told you I would let you know if I do."_

 _"I beg to differ. I think you do need a new Sub, Christian. It's so obvious that this girl is not right for you, you're losing control, why can't you see that?"_

 _I notice the kitchen light turn off so I know Mia and Anastasia are finished with the cake and will be heading to the dining room now._

 _"I have to get back to my family and my_ girlfriend _." I taunt her right back, not answering her, and walking away without a backwards glance._

 _"More?" She laughs. "That's what this is about? Christian, you and I both know-"_

 _~buzz~_

 _~END OF FLASHBACK~_

 _~buzz~_

My intercom disturbs me from my thoughts.

"Yes." I answer.

 _"Mr. Grey, Ms. Lincoln is here to see you."_ Andrea lets me know _. "She has an appointment, sir."_

"Send her in, Andrea."

I haven't signed the paperwork yet, but I can do that while she's in here as I explain what I'm doing.

"Christian," Elena begins before she's fully inside my office. "What is this about, darling?"

"Have a seat, Elena, and I'll explain everything." I don't bother standing to greet her.

"You have me worried, darling."

She sits, crossing one leg over the other.

"No need." I reassure her, then continue to tell her the reason for this meeting. "I'd like to gift you my share of the salons. They're doing quite well on their own and no longer need my backing."

"I'll always need you, Christian, but if you feel this is what's best, darling."

"If you'll sign here." I pass her the paperwork that I had my lawyers and financial team prepare.

She makes quick work of her signature on all copies of the paperwork.

All that's left is my signature.

I accept the paperwork back and as soon as my pen makes contact with the paperwork my door bursts open unannounced, pissing me the fuck off in the process. I look up before I can sign the paperwork, ready to chew out whomever entered without my expressed permission, but to my surprise, it's Anastasia.

"Anastasia," I stand to greet her, unable to control my smile, regardless of the fact that Elena is sitting here. "To what do I owe this surprise?"

 _How the fuck did she get in here?_

"I just thought you should know something about your _friend_." She says as I reach her and kiss her cheek.

I frown when I pull back, she doesn't look happy.

"What is it?" I demand, confused, not only by the look on her face but her reason for being here.

She said she thought I should know something about my friend, but the way she said friend wasn't friendly.

 _Is she talking about Stephanie?_

Anastasia turns to look at Elena, who is just sitting there, looking straight ahead, unaffected by the sudden interruption or Anastasia speaking out of turn, like she normally would be. I'm actually quite surprised that she's quiet, not going on about Subs knowing their place.

"Where are my manners?" Anastasia says overly sweetly, looking at Elena. "Good afternoon, Ms. Lincoln."

Elena turns her head slightly, gives Ana a tight forced smile then returns to looking straight ahead, not saying a thing.

"Anastasia, I'm in the middle of something right now. Can-"

"How are you today, Ms. Lincoln?" Anastasia interrupts me, continuing to speak with Elena still in her overly sweet voice.

Elena turns to face Anastasia again, smiling fake and tight.

"Fine." She barely whispers sounding nothing like herself. Elena even flickers her brow, a telltale sign that she's lying.

 _Why wouldn't she be fine and why would she lie about it?_

It's now that I notice Taylor standing near the door, in position. He must of allowed Anastasia permission to enter my office, but why? He knows I don't like to be kept out of the loop, and he knows my schedule so he would know I was in a meeting, especially with Elena.

 _What the fuck is going on?!_

Instead of asking Taylor, I start to turn my head towards Anastasia.

"Anastasia, what-"

"What's the matter, Ms. Lincoln?" I hear Anastasia continue, interrupting me before I can finish my sentence. I finally look at her, trying to figure out what is going on. "You don't want me to hear your voice so that I can tell Christian that you are the one that told me he was married at the charity event in the lady's room?"

At that, Elena snaps her head in our direction.

"I don't know what you are talking about." Elena sneers in her more Dominatrix voice.

"What?!" I roar at Elena, unbelieving. " _You_ told Anastasia I was married?! Why?!"

 _I lost Anastasia because of this bullshit!_

Elena stands now, her full Dominant height.

"She's lying, darling. I never said that."

"But you implied it!" Anastasia shouts next to me. "You're nothing but a sick child molester, and if it were up to me, I'd toss you into the seventh circle of hell and walk away smiling." Seems Anastasia has figured out Elena was the one to introduce me to BDSM and she's not too pleased.

"How dare you! I'm not a child molester!"

"You had sex with an underage boy, Elena." Anastasia growls. "That's a clear definition."

Elena opens her mouth to speak but Anastasia continues before Elena can say anything.

"Why are you still around?" Anastasia asks Elena. "He's too old for you, Elena, don't you think? I know how you like 'em young."

"Are you just going to stand there and let her speak to me like this?!" I know she's asking if I'm going to punish Anastasia.

I was going to say something to Anastasia, but I'm fuming, furious that Elena was the one to approach Anastasia at the charity event.

 _I never thought Elena would do this. To me, no less._

Elena just put her own nail in her coffin with this shit.

"You should know a wolf will always protect his kitten." I glare at Elena, as I gently push Anastasia behind me, protecting her.

"Christian?!" Elena shouts surprised that I took Anastasia's side over hers.

"You're his mother's friend for goodness sake!" Anastasia continues behind me.

"You need to keep your pet on a tighter leash, Christian, she's very disrespectful! She's obviously not right for you."

"She's perfect. Anastasia is everything that I want."

"But you have needs, Christian." Elena all but pleads. "She couldn't possibly fulfill your needs."

Anastasia suddenly bursts into a fit of giggles behind me.

"You think this is funny, Anastasia?!"

"I'm laughing at your audacity and your pathetic pleading attempts, Elena."

"He has needs, needs you cannot possibly begin to satisfy!"

"What do you know of his needs?!" Anastasia snarls at Elena as she comes out from behind me, now standing between me and Elena, like she's shielding me. "Our relationship is none of your concern. And the fact that you are jealous and intimidated enough to warn me of him is hilarious."

"Did he tell you he called me when you left him?" Elena asks in what seems like a last-ditch effort to rile up Anastasia.

 _Fuck! What will Anastasia think?!_

I didn't ask Elena for shit, I told her it was a mistake calling and hung up before I could say why I was calling for fuck's sake! I hope Anastasia doesn't think I was calling to get a new Sub, because that was exactly my reason for phoning Elena and my almost slip up, and right fucking now, I'm so fucking glad I did not slip. But I can't very well plead my case here in front of Elena.

"I don't give a fuck if he called you old and menopausal, unlike you, I am not insecure of our relationship."

I release a breath I didn't realize I was holding, relieved.

 _Thank fuck!_

"But you believe someone telling you he's in a relationship?" Elena gloats.

"You _should_ be proud." Anastasia praises Elena. "You're a master manipulator. The variables of that night were in your favor. But I wasn't leaving the bathroom to go home, I left to talk to him. And I guarantee if had known Mia was his sister, I would have talked to him about it then and there, and that would have foiled your plans. Your little ruse didn't work because it wasn't true. That was your first mistake. What would you of done then? Hire a look alike and take pictures of her with other men and tell Christian it's me?"

 _Shit, now she's giving Elena ideas._

"It's funny that you think you can fulfill Christian's needs." Anastasia continues. "That's why he came looking for me, because you weren't fulfilling his needs with Submissives, probably wanting him to be desperate enough to fuck you again. But unbeknownst to you, he wouldn't touch your nasty, old, loose, dried up pussy again with a ten inch pole, let alone his incredible cock that he pleases me with. _Every._ Single. Night."

It seems Anastasia has quite the backbone and can handle her own. My kitten's claws have come out to play.

"That's what this is about?" I finally speak up during the verbal cat fight and ask Elena. "You not finding me a Submissive for months. You wanted me to... what ... come back to you?" I remember her saying we should talk about what our relationship will entail when I sent her the email that I no longer needed a Sub. "That's it, isn't."

"I was the best thing that ever happened to you, Christian. I taught you everything you know, everything you need." She hisses. "You should be thankful. Look at you now, you're master of your universe and want for nothing. You know we were good together, baby, and we would still be together if Linc hadn't of found out! That's why no other has lasted as long as I have. We're made from the same cloth. This little girl cannot possible satisfy you like I can."

Elena _is_ the longest relationship I've ever had, but that's done, old news _._ Pun intended.

"You _are_ jealous." I accuse her, ignoring her pleas that we belong together. "Why else would you warn Anastasia to stay away from me?"

"I'm not jealous of _her_." Elena says like it's the most absurd thing, as she eyes Anastasia with disgust.

"Oh?" Anastasia says just as unbelieving as me. "Aren't you? ... I have what you want. The one thing you will _never_ have again."

"You'll do well to remember that I had him first."

"Because you molested him!" Thank fuck my office is sound proof as Anastasia shouts. "You're lucky you're not rotting in some jail cell, you sick disgusting pedophile! You may of had him first because you manipulated a hormonal teenage boy, but you will _never_ have him again, you washed up old hag!"

I can't believe how much of a fight Anastasia is giving Elena, and it's because of me. _Me._ She's protecting me. I've never had anyone so _protective_ of me before. I let Anastasia continue on while I just stand here with my hands in my pockets listening, ready to intervene if necessary.

"I'm the only one that can handle him and I am the only one to have his Submission." Elena's now taunting, gloating as she speaks. "Why do you think he's gone through so many weak Submissives? I've had him fully satisfied for _6 long years_ , and in the last seven years he's gone through Submissive after Submissive. You're nothing special, just on a long list of many others who couldn't satisfy him, darling."

I'm about to say something, but once again Anastasia is quick to interfere.

They continue to go back and forth, as if I'm not here at all.

"He's had so many not up to par with his standards, because _you_ handpick them, knowing full well they wont last. I bet if they lasted too long for your liking, you interfered, didn't you? You knew he would terminate their contract, hoping he would come running back to you, but he never did, did he?!"

 _I never fucking thought of that!_

"When he didn't give in, you stopped providing Submissives in your last-ditch effort to keep him and get him to come back to you. But that didn't work, because thanks to you, he went looking elsewhere and he found _me. He. Chose. Me!_ " Anastasia boasts. "So you know _damn well_ I am _exactly_ what he wants and _exactly_ what he needs, and you better believe I'm here to fucking stay."

I feel that strange emotion when Anastasia says she's going to stay, with me.

Elena humphs in dismay.

"You've gone weak, Christian. You're no longer the strong Dominant I-"

"That's what you think." Anastasia interrupts Elena. "But then, you'll never know again because he's mine. All mine, and only mine."

 _Can Anastasia look any fucking sexier?!_

"When a man loves a woman, she becomes his _weakness_." Elena sneers. "Love is for fools!"

 _Who the fuck said any-fucking-thing about love?!_

"And when a woman loves a man, he becomes her _strength_!" Anastasia bites back, not backing down. "It's called an exchange of power and is totally different than the power exchange in the bedroom."

"This," Anastasia continues as she grabs my dick trough my pants. _Fuck! Don't get hard, Grey!_ "is mine!" Anastasia growls possessively.

 _Too fucking late, possessive Anastasia is fucking sexy as hell!_

Elena glares but is unaffected. _She's had that_. Many, have had that.

I decided to show Elena, Anastasia can do something she can't and could never do to me. What nobody can do to me.

I put my hand on Anastasia's, that is still holding my dick through my pants, and move it. Anastasia falters a bit, probably assuming I'm going to contradict her, but I take a deep breath, holding it, and slide Anastasia's hand to my chest, and brace myself for the pain. Thank fuck I'm wearing clothing.

"This," Anastasia sprawls her hand on my chest, not putting any pressure but holding steady. Her voice slightly softer. I'm sure she can feel how fast my heart is beating, and she probably thinks I'm in pain, but surprisingly... I'm not. I'm able to release the breath I was holding. It ... _tingles._ No one has touched me in this area in over 24 years. And those who have, it felt nothing like this.

Elena's eyes nearly bug out of her skull seeing this, then she shoots a glance at my face. Instead of my usual impassive poker-face, I'm unable to help smirk a bit as I hold Anastasia's hand to my chest, adding more pressure. There's no fear in my eyes, and Elena can see that.

"This is mine, and it's something you can never and have never had. It's. Mine!" She growls. "And it will only ever be. Mine!"

I'm not sure what Anastasia is talking about, but whatever. I just did this to show Elena that Anastasia can touch me.

"He's mine."

Anastasia moves her hand, only there for a moment but I already miss it, as she takes one step closer to Elena.

Anastasia suddenly transformes. She's taller, more confident, sexier, ... _Dominant?!_

 _Holy fucking shit! Anastasia in Domme-mode is fucking to die for!_

 _I can just imagine Anastasia in full Dominatrix gear, and the thought is not helping my hard-on._

We're all three standing tall and Dominant, and that's when I realize, it would piss Elena the fuck off if she knew I gave my Submission to anyone other than her, so I immediately dial down my Dominant instinct and get into Sub-mode as Anastasia continues to crucify Elena in her sexy as fuck Domme-mode.

"Don't look at him, don't speak to him, don't even _think_ about thinking of him. If you so much as breath the same air as my man," _My man? I like it._ "I'll come after you, I _will_ find you, and it wont be pleasant when I do. I'd really like to smack you right now, but knowing what you enjoy, you'd probably get off on it. And since I know what you like; chains, whips or anything else to do with BDSM will not be a part of what I plan to do to you if you so much as come near what is mine again. Stay the _fuck_ away from him."

 _Just when I thought she couldn't get any sexier, threating Domme-mode Anastasia is beyond sexy as fuck! She's to die for._

My pants cannot be any tighter around my now painfully raging hard-on.

Since I'm in Sub-mode with my head bowed Submissively, I can clearly see the huge bulge in my pants, and if Elena sees this it will confirm that Anastasia is my Dominant and I am her Submissive. Elena has trained me to control my body, and my body is instinctively reacting to Anastasia, not only Anastasia, but Anastasia in Domme-mode.

I will never relinquish control, I need it, crave it, but Anastasia in Domme-mode is sexy as hell.

 _I need a release!_

"I haven't thought of you as a worthy adversary, Anastasia, but you've surprised me." _Was that a compliment?_

"I haven't thought of you at all." Anastasia says so smoothly, then again, she didn't know anything about Elena before other than what I told her. "Now if you'll excuse me, I have much better things to do than waste my time with the likes of you."

I hear heels clicking across the tiled floor, and I'm not sure whose they are, but they suddenly falter, stopping.

"Sit!" I hear Anastasia say in a sexy, hard, Dominatrix voice, so portraying the Sub I am not, I do as I'm told.

"Yes, Mistress Anastasia." I add for show, sitting behind my desk now.

"Why are you still standing there?" I hear Anastasia say, presumably to Elena. "Get the fuck out of this office before I drag you out by your hair."

"I'm not going anywhere until he signs over my salons."

"Your salons?" Anastasia says like it's a ridiculous thing for Elena to call them hers.

I've told Anastasia I'm a silent partner in Esclava Salons when I took her to one to get her pampered before the charity event, so she must know now that I'm backing Elena's salons. Thank fuck Elena wasn't there the day I took Anastasia.

"Yes!" Elena hisses at her. "Christian, sign the papers so I can be on my way and you and your little... _thing_ can play whatever silly game it is that you play. Call me when you've had enough of this little girl and want a real woman."

I don't react.

I was planning on signing them over to her, gifting them to her, because I felt I owed her that much, but now I don't want to, however, I'll fucking sign them to get rid of her, to get her out of my life. _Fucking jealous bitch_. But I know by me not reacting to her Domme voice is making her furious. I only wish I could see her face.

"I'm sorry, maybe you didn't hear me." Anastasia says to Elena in her sweet voice now. "I said don't speak to my man. He doesn't answer to you."

"Then you tell him to sign those papers and I'll be on my way."

I hear heels clicking on the tiled floor again, coming closer to me, so I presume it's Anastasia.

"These papers?" I see Anastasia's slender arm reach out as she picks up the paperwork from my desk. She's still speaking in a sweet tone.

"Yes, have him sign them." Elena demands.

I try not to smirk when I hear paper being ripped, then ripped again and again.

"Fuck you and your salons!" I see scraps flying everywhere. Anastasia must have thrown the papers at Elena.

"Christian has controlling shares." Anastasia gets back in sexy ass Domme-mode. "I control Christian."

 _Don't react to her lie, Grey_.

"Use your imagination for what I have planned for them."

"You little bitch!" Elena sneers.

I trust Taylor to be near. He'll protect Anastasia if Elena were to do anything, and Anastasia is standing behind my desk next to me. So I don't react, further portraying a Submissive to Anastasia.

"After everything I've done for you, Christian, this is how I'm treated?"

I stay quiet, as much as I want to lash out, I know my Submission to Anastasia is getting to her.

"What about everything he's done for you?!"

"I've done far more for him than you can imagine." Elena growls.

"And if he said anything when he was FIFTEEN you would be rioting in a jail cell, you sick bitch!"

"Taylor, please get her out of my sight." I hear Anastasia order my employee, who must be having a fucking field day with this show. No doubt it's taking all _his_ control to stay his usual impassive self.

"Yes, Ms. Steele." Taylor responds to Anastasia like she's his boss.

I know that will get to Elena as well, further pissing her off. Taylor takes orders from no one but me. And Elena has tried on more than one occasion to get Taylor to do something but he wouldn't react to her until I gave the okay.

"Look at me." Anastasia orders me as she straddles my lap.

When I obey her, I see Taylor 'escorting' Elena out of my office and her face is just as I pictured it to be.

"Kiss me." Anastasia demands in that sexy as fuck Dominatrix voice so I do as my 'Domme' has demanded of me and kiss her in full view of Elena.

"Noooooooo! Get off me! Get your goddamn hands off me, Taylor! Christian!" I hear Elena scream just before I hear my door close as I continue to kiss Anastasia, showing her how much I appreciate her, standing up for me, protecting me.

 **APOV**

As soon as the door of Christian's office closes, I pull away from our kiss.

Christian sets me on top of his desk then makes his way to the door.

 _Oh. My. God. I can't believe I just did that!_

I didn't know if Christian would go along with me or defend her again, and when she taunted me with being the only one to have his Submission, I wanted to throw it in her face that I am the Domme in our relationship, even though, I am not. When I turned to look at Christian, and noticed he was in Sub-mode, I just went with it. Thank fuck he went along with it too.

I'm literally shaking as the adrenaline leaves my body. _What must he think of me?!_

"Andrea," I hear Christian call to someone, but I don't dare make a move to turn around. "I want Ms. Lincoln added to my proscribed list, let Taylor know, though I'm sure he already does, and I want to speak to him about Sawyer's position when I'm available. Furthermore, I want Anastasia Steele available to me at all times."

"Yes, sir." I hear Ms. Parker reply, her first name must be Andrea.

"I want no interruptions, cancel everything on my schedule for the afternoon, and call down to Grey Publishing and let them know I said Anastasia Steele will not be returning to work today." _What is he doing?! No one here can know about us!_

"Yes, Mr. Grey."

"No interruptions. No exceptions." He repeats in a domineering CEO/Dom tone, then I hear the door close and a click, so I know he locked it.

I'm still to anxious to face him. I can hear him returning, as well as see his reflection in the floor to ceiling windows.

"Christian," I begin to apologize when he finally makes it back to me. "I'm so sorry, I just-"

"You were so fucking hot, Anastasia." He growls, crashing his mouth against my lips.

 _Oh!_

I wrap my arms around his neck, holding him to me, letting my hands run through his hair, grasping it.

He continues his less than gentle ways as he shoves my skirt up, bunching it around my hips.

"Oh fuck, you're wearing stockings." He moans against my mouth. "I need to be inside you, baby. Now."

"Yes." I pant out. _Please!_

He runs his hands up my thighs, and I feel and hear my panties being ripped from my body, then I hear his belt and a zipper.

He sits back on his chair bringing me with him.

I'm so wet, I easily slide onto his dick.

"Oooh!" I moan, tossing my head back as I hold onto the back of his chair.

"Ride me, baby." He demands. "Show me who I belong to."

I begin to move with Christian, rocking against his trusts.

I feel him grab my wrists and bring my hands to his exposed chest, that I didn't even realize was bare, completely bare.

 _Oh my god, I'm finally touching him!_

He groans, and I'm not sure if it's pleasure or pain, but he holds my hands there while we move.

After awhile, Christian moves his hands from mine and holds my hips as we continue to fuck in his office. He's forcing me to move harder and faster.

Christian grabs my head with one of his hands, pulling me toward him and kissing me like he just came home from war, and if that didn't make me even wetter and my sex clenching around him even tighter. I'm not sure why he's allowing me to touch him, but I move my hands into his hair while we kiss.

"Oh, baby, you have to cum." He sounds like he's just barely holding on as he pleads, practically begs me, so desperate for me to cum.

"I'm cuming! I'm cuming!" I let him know then I scream a mangled version of his name, soaking his dick in my arousal as I continue to bounce on his lap, riding out my orgasm. Oh, the delicious clenching my sex does around him, the way my muscles convulse, it feels as if I'm nonstop cuming.

"Anastasia!" He roars, exploding inside me.

"Christian." I moan his name in pleasure against his neck, tugging at his hair.

He puts his hands on my hips again, pumping his release inside of me. My sex is still clenching deliciously around him, milking every last drop of cum from him. I can hear his ragged breathing in my ear, and I'm sure he hears mine.

"Oh, baby." He moans after he's finished cuming.

We're both panting, as we try to calm our breathing.

I'm straddling his lap, still fully clothed, with my skirt bunched up around my hips. Christian's still in his suit with his shirt unbuttoned completely, but still on, and his pants unzipped and shimmed down his thighs. _It's naughty employee vs. sexy boss_.

My forehead is now resting against his while I play with the hair on the nape of his neck. My eyes are closed as I come down from my high. I'm not sure what he's doing, but his hands are still on my hips. We're both hot and sticky from sweat. The smell of sex lingering in the air. He's still inside me and I can feel him leak out of me.

I finally pop open my eyes to look at him.

As I stare into his eyes, I see it, and I can only imagine my eyes reflect his.

 _Holy fuck! I'm in trouble!_

* * *

 **A/N: _Yes, part of the Elena showdown was from the books.  
But as you know by now, that's how I do things. Take from the book & twist it._**

 ** _Thanks for reading and reviewing._**


	20. (20) Kiss With A Twist

**APOV**

This week has been a whirlwind of activity, none of which involved Christian after Tuesday morning. After having sex in his office we left to go to his apartment. There, he convinced me to stay the night with him, on a weekday. _What can I say?_ He's very talented and his persuading skills are phenomenal. Of course, my _'yes, yes, yes'_ was more of an orgasmic release than a _'yes, I will stay the night with you'_ but he ran with it.

A weekday morning was somewhat different than our weekend mornings. I slept in his bed, even though the last time I slept in his bed he said it wouldn't happen again. I think he's more for it now; me sleeping with him. I enjoyed waking up in his arms and even helped him tie is tie, like he needed the help, and I'm sure whoever saw him that day assumed he got dressed in the dark.

Instead of us making our own breakfast like we do on the weekends, Gail, his house manager, made our meal.

Since I had no clean clothes and I didn't stop at my apartment before we arrived at Escala, I used the clothing Christian bought me so I wouldn't wear the same outfit to work the next day. Thank goodness the price tags were not on any of the clothing because I know the outfit I chose is surely more expensive than my entire wardrobe.

Because he drove us to his penthouse Monday, I left my car at _Grey House_ over night, and he had to drive me to work Tuesday morning. He said he had a meeting somewhere, so he just dropped me off. Thank goodness no employees or my coworkers saw us, or me getting out of his car.

I had to cancel my lunch date with Stephanie Monday, because of the whole Elena ordeal, and rescheduled for Tuesday. I really needed to speak with her. She warned me not to do exactly what I feel I'm doing; falling. Without going into too much detail, I told her a little about what was happening. Instead of telling him what she said the first time I saw her, she tried to convince me to tell Christian.

 _~FLASHBACK~_

 _"Maybe... Maybe you should just tell him?" She suggests. "I mean, the worst that could happen is he ends your contract, but if what you're telling me is true, that he's acting this way with you, that you don't have a Total Power Exchange, maybe you should mention it? Because from what I know, he's never ever acted this way towards a Sub before, not towards me that's for sure, and I know damn well he didn't give more to any Subs in the Sub-Club. Maybe he feels the same as you do?"_

 _"But if I tell him... If he ends my contract..." I can't even finish my sentences, not wanting to even think about him leaving me._

 _"It's a risk you'll have to take, but I can understand your reluctance. You could always leave subtle hints."_

 _~END OF FLASHBACK~_

 _Maybe I could give him subtle hints_. After all, he's the one who is giving me mixed signals. He's the one who initiated everything, he's the one who wanted to make love, he's the one who is doing things he hasn't done with any other Sub, he's the one who introduced me to his family and let his family believe we are in a romantic relationship. _Maybe he does want more_.

Maybe I should just tell him. Maybe he feels the same. He's obviously giving me more than he's given any other, he's said so himself. It's only natural for me to feel something, and if he gets upset by it, I can blame it on him.

But then again, _I_ am the one who insisted on not having a Total Power Exchange relationship. As far as I know this is his first relationship like this, so maybe this is just how he acts when there's not a TPE. Besides, he told me after leaving his parents' house that just because his family thinks our relationship is more than it is, doesn't mean it will be.

It's a risk I can't take. I can't tell him. I can't lose Christian, so I have done my best to avoid Christian the rest of the week, although we do still message each other. _Shit!_ I mean, Mr. Grey. If I'm going to do this, prevent myself from falling, I need to get use to calling him by any other name than his given name. _Mr. Grey, Sir, and Master are all acceptable forms_. And only be around him during our contractual weekends together.

I've also been reading his contract word for word, studying it like I have an exam. Christian, _damn it!_ , Mr. Grey is giving me more than he has any Sub before, but that doesn't mean he's okay with falling in love, so I'm going to leave that up to him. If he tells me he wants _more_ , I will gladly give him more, but until then, I can't let my heart fall and I have to protect it.

It's the weekend, finally Friday, and since we agreed that I would play with Christian every other weekend, unless I wasn't busy, which I'm not, but he's in Portland on business this weekend, I'm staying home today. _Gosh, that was a lot to get out, and I still referred to him as Christian! Whatever._

I'm glad he messaged me, letting me know he arrived safely in Portland this morning. Christian, _yes I am using his given name_ , is going to try and come home tomorrow night, but he said it could be as late as Sunday morning that he returns. He's going to let me know when he's home because I told him I would come to Escala when he returned to Seattle.

I'm kind of nervous to go to Escala and play. How am I going to prevent myself from falling further if he continues to be sweet loveable Christian? Not that I don't want him to be sweet loveable Christian. _Ugh, I'm totally fucked!_ Wow, what a pun.

Kate is going out with Elliot tonight and I don't want to be alone, bored out of my mind, so I've invited Stephanie over to hang out.

We've become good friends, as weird as it sounds, and I even hooked her and Chad up.

 _~FLASHBACK~_

 _Stephanie and I have been hanging out more often and having lunch together. She's actually really nice and sweet._

 _Since we're both going in the same direction, Stephanie is walking me back to work._

 _"Ugh."_

 _"What's wrong?" I ask her as she reads her phone._

 _"My Mistress hasn't found me anyone yet."_

 _"Your Mistress hasn't found you a Dom?" I assume this is what she means._

 _"Yeah, she hooks me up with them."_

 _"Like your pimp?"_

 _"Kind of, I guess. I never really thought of it like that."_

 _It's now that I realize Elena fucking Lincoln set Christian up with all his previous Subs, so that means Elena is Stephanie's Mistress._

No, just no.

 _"I may know a Dom who's looking for a new Sub." I say thinking of Chad. If Stephanie falls for her Doms and they end her contract because of it, I know Chad wont. He and I were in a romantic relationship, so I know he wont have a problem with it if she does fall for him._

 _"Really?"_

 _"Yeah, I'll show you a photo."_

 _I pull out my phone as we wait just outside_ Grey House _, since I have a few minutes of my break left, and find a photo of Chad. Most have me in them but I do find a few of him solo. Maybe I should delete the ones of him and I together, not that it's a problem I have photos of us together, but they are photos of us when we were in a relationship. I'll have to retake some of us together as friends._

 _"This is Chad." I show her a photo._

 _"He's hot!"_

 _"I can give him a call on your behalf. Try and hook you up with him." I tell her._

 _"Yes, please." She grins. "Thanks, Ana!"_

 _"No, problem, it's the least I can do. I'll call him right now."_

"Hey, you." _He answers on the second ring._

 _"Hi, Chad. I was wondering if you're looking for someone... You know, looking for a Sub? I have a friend that's in the lifestyle and she's looking for a Dom."_

 _He's quiet for awhile._

"What's she like?" _He finally asks_.

 _"Well, her name is Stephanie Addams. Um, I'll send you her photo in a message with her number and you two can talk about starting a relationship, if you want. I have to get back to work."_

"Alright."

 _"Okay, I have to get to work but I'll send her photo now."_

 _I hang up._

 _"I'm going to send him a photo of you and give him your number if that's alright. That way you two can talk about it."_

 _"Oh gosh, do I look okay?" She asks, frantically fixing her hair._

 _"You look fine." I giggle at her attempt to look better than she already does. "Ready?"_

 _"As I'll ever be."_

 _She poses and I'm surprised she's not trying to look overly sexy but still looks her beautiful self. I don't know whether to like her, envy her, or what, but I find that I really do like her, regardless of her ex status with my man._

 _I take a few photos of her, Steph and I pick the best one, and I send it to Chad along with her number._

 _She grins as her phone immediately rings with Chad's number._

 _We hug goodbye then she walks away to answer her call._

 _I go inside Grey House to go back to work._

 _There, now Christian wont be jealous of Chad if he has someone, and Stephanie wont be affiliated with a pedophile._

 _~END OF FLASHBACK~_

Steph's the only one besides Christian and Chad, who knows what I like, to an extant. Kate knows too, however, she doesn't understand it. Thankfully, Kate does not know about Christian's involvement with the lifestyle. I've already told Stephanie about Kate, and when I mentioned not to say anything to Kate about Christian, she reminded me of the NDA she signed; stating that she can't.

It's getting late so Stephanie should be here soon.

 _~buzz~_

I skip to the door to answer the intercom, knowing it's Stephanie.

"Hi!" I answer.

 _"Hey, Ana!"_ I'm taken by surprise with the manly reply. _"It's me."_

It takes me a minute to recognize his voice through the door entry system.

"José?"

 _"Yeah, are ya gonna let me up?"_

"What are you doing here?" I smile as I continue to talk to him through the intercom.

 _"I'll tell you if you ever let me up."_ He chuckles.

"Right." I push the button to unlock the main door so he can finally come up, then go to the door and open it as I wait for him.

When I see him at the stairs I walk out into the hallway and hug him. He's dress in a pair of gray skinny jeans, gray plaid button up shirt, and gray sneakers. It makes me think of Grey, my Grey. _No, Ana! Don't think of him_.

"What are you doing here?" I ask again, trying not to fantasize about Christian Grey.

"I was in the area and thought I'd stop by. Sorry I didn't call before I showed up; you said if I was ever in Seattle, I should come over."

"It's okay." I tell him as we walk back into the apartment. "I'm sorry I missed your show. Chad and I..." I trail off not wanting to tell him about the argument we had on the way to his show.

"I understand, it's cool." I'm not sure what he understands, but I let it go.

"Ana, do you-" Kate starts when she walks into our main room, just as José and I walk back into the apartment, but she stops talking when she sees José.

"Kate, look who's here." I tell her, shutting the apartment door.

"Hey, José!" She grins and hugs him.

"Hey, Kate!" He hugs her right back. "I was just telling Ana I was in the area and thought I'd stop by to see her, and you." He adds her like it's an afterthought.

"Oh, well, I'm leaving in a bit, but Ana's staying in."

"Cool." José grins at me. "You don't mind if we hang out do you, Ana?"

"Actually, I have-"

 _~buzz~_

The intercom interrupts me.

Kate answers it since it's probably Elliot, but since Steph isn't here yet, it could possible be her.

"I have company coming over soon. It's sort of a girls only thing." I finish telling José. "I can't cancel."

"Oh." José looks down.

"Ana, that was your friend Stephanie." Kate tells me. "She's on her way up."

"I'm sorry, José, you really should have called before you stopped by."

"It's cool." He shrugs his shoulders. "I thought I'd take my chances."

 _~knock~knock~knock~_

When Kate opens the door, we're a little surprised to see Elliot with Stephanie.

"I didn't know we were coming to the same apartment, but I ran to catch the door when this lovely lady entered." Elliot explains then looks around. "Are we all going out?"

"You wanna join us?" Kate asks. "We're going to the Mile High club."

"What do you think, Steph?"

"I'm down, if you are."

"Sure, why not." I shrug my shoulders.

"Great." Kate grins.

"I guess I should introduce you." I remember Kate hasn't offically met Stephanie yet. "Kate, this is my friend Stephanie Addams. Steph, this is Kate, my best friend and roommate. Katherine Kavanagh." I look at Elliot and realize Stephanie has never met him. "And this is Elliot Grey."

I giggle a little at Stephanie's expression, meeting Christian's brother.

"I'm José." I turn around hearing José.

 _I thought he already left_.

"Sorry, this is my friend from college." I tell Stephanie. "José Rodríguez."

"It's nice to meet you all." Stephanie smiles politely.

"Ana, if your coming with, you have to change out of your comfy sweats."

"Oh!" Stephanie seems thrilled. "I can help you get ready."

"Do you mind if I tag along?" José asks. "Since you're all going out."

"No, not at all." I say as Kate pulls me towards her room with Stephanie following, to get me ready.

Stephanie is wearing jeans and a cute top, but she's going to borrow some heels from Kate; gold to match her top.

I have on my comfy sweats and a tank top, so I sit back and let Kate and Stephanie take over.

 **~..~..~**

"Do you mind if I ask Chad to join us?" Stephanie asks as she and I sit in the back of Elliot's truck.

Kate is in the passenger seat with Elliot driving us, of course, and José is following us in his car.

"I kind of feel like the fifth wheel." She tells me.

"Not at all."

I don't mind, but now José and I are the only 'single' people in our group. I'm not 'single' but my 'partner' isn't with me.

 _Oh, well, we're all friends._

 _ **~..~..~**_

It didn't take us long to find a table because Elliot's brother owns the club, so we're all sitting at a table in the VIP section. A waitress has already came over with shots on a tray, and is ready to take our drink orders. Apparently, if you're family of the owner, like Elliot is, you are served quickly.

Chad arrived minutes after us.

José didn't look pleased to see Chad but his mood quickly shifted when he saw Chad wrap his arm possessively around Stephanie.

"What's going on with you and that guy?" José whispers loudly in my ear over the club's music, nodding towards Chad.

"We're just friends now." I tell him, knowing he's questioning Chad's ethics with my friend.

"Really?!" He asks a little too excited.

"Yeah."

 _Come on, I wanna dance in the dark_  
 _Come on, we gonna light up the night_  
 _Come on, I wanna dance in the dark_  
 _Come on, we gonna light up the night_

"Ana!" Kate shouts when she hears a song begin. "Let's go dance."

"Okay! Come on, Steph. Let's 'dance in the dark'."

Kate, Steph, and I go to the dance floor and dance together for awhile.

The guys are either at our table, at the bar, or lost in the crowd, I don't really know.

 _I wanna dance in the dark_  
 _And never stop_  
 _We're gonna light up the night_  
 _Like shooting stars_  
 _Whenever you hear the sound_  
 _Don't be alarmed_  
 _Oh, oh, oh, dancing in the dark_

I continue to dance with my girls. We shout as we sing, song after song, without a care, until we need a drink break.

When we return to the table, Elliot already has 3 cocktails waiting for us.

We continue to drink, dance, and party.

I drink more and more as it is keeping me distracted from thinking about Christian, but I know my limits and keep to them so I don't get trashed. I'm not that drunk, but I am feeling good. I've never really been drunk before, not even for my 21st birthday, and I don't plan on getting shit-faced in public, so I'm drinking my last drink of the night, but I'll still dance and have fun with my friends.

"Ana." I look up hearing my name and see Elliot coming back from the restrooms.

"Yeah?"

"It's for you." I frown when he hands me his phone then sits next to Kate.

"Hello?" I answer but can't hear whoever it is over the music and crowded club.

"Hold on." I tell the caller.

"I'll be right back guys." I tell my friends, and get up to take the call somewhere more privately.

"Hello?" I answer the call again once I'm in the hallway for the restrooms.

 _"Anastasia."_ I bite my lip when I hear my name in a sexy as fuck Dominant tone. _"What the fuck are you doing?"_

"Oh." I giggle when I hear he's not happy. "I'm just having fun, sir." I somehow remember to address him properly. "What are you doing?"

 _"You're drunk."_ He states.

"I believe the terminology is buzzed." I correct him, giggling again.

 _"And your ex? What's the terminology for him being there?"_

"Chad?" I ask confused as to why he would ask about him.

 _"Do you have another ex I don't know about."_

"Mr. Grey, you don't sound very pleased." I giggle again. I've been told I'm very giggly when I drink.

 _"I'm not, Anastasia. I'm very pissed the fuck off."_

"Why?" I bite my lip so I don't giggle again because he indeed sounds very upset and I don't want to further upset him.

I suspect his business in Portland is not going the way he wants it too, meaning he wont be home tomorrow night, but Sunday morning instead.

 _"Because you're out drinking and partying with your_ ex _and you haven't bothered to inform me or answer your goddamned phone."_ He growls through Elliot's cell. _"_ _I was forced to call Elliot."_

"But I'm with my friends. ... And I don't have my phone. ... Hey, how did you know I was with Elliot?"

 _"Why are you with him?"_

"Because he and Kate where going out and they invited-"

 _"Not Elliot!"_ He interrupts my explanation of why I'm with Elliot even though he asked. _"Garrett."_

"We don't have a TPE relationship, Mr. Grey." I remind him. He knows Chad is my friend. "I'm allowed to have fun with my friends."

 _"Just because I don't control you outside the Playroom doesn't mean it's okay for my... for my Submissive to party and drink with her ex the first opportunity I'm away."_

"He's my friend." I defend myself. "What do you want me to do? Avoid my friends on my weekends away from you because you don't like me to have a life without you?"

 _"No, of course not. I would just prefer you not hang out with someone you've_ fucked _."_

"That's a low blow, coming from you, considering you hung out with AND have done business with your... that... Ugh! Why is it okay that you've slept around with all of who knows who, and still talk to them, but it's not okay that I've had sex with one, ONE, other person? You're acting like a jealous boyfriend, and I haven't even done anything. Chad is with-" I stop from telling him that Chad and Steph are together when I realize what I just said.

 _Oh god, I called him my boyfriend! I referred to him as a boyfriend._

"Is that what you want?" My drunkenness is making me bold. "For... for us to move forward in our relationship? To be my boyfriend?"

I hold my breath waiting for his answer.

This is it. I basically told him, I want him to be my boyfriend. I'm not so subtlety hinting and suggesting towards 'more' without asking for it directly, but asking him if that's what _he_ wants is 'more'. I hope he doesn't take it the wrong way even though the wrong way is the correct way; that I want more.

He takes way too long to respond and I end up checking the call's connection twice before he finally answers.

 _"No."_ He finally says, quietly and much more calm than he was before, effectively breaking my heart. _"I've told you, I don't do the girlfriend thing."_

"Mr. Grey, you're so confusing. I'm so confused as to what you want from me." I rub my temple as I'm already starting to get a headache from this conversation. "You're giving me all these... And I... You're... When we... But you've never..." I sigh. "I don't know what to say. I'm sorry. I'll just go home." I tell him sadly in defeat.

 _"Anastasia..."_ He trails off, like he wants to say more, then sighs. _"Have Elliot call you a cab or ride home with him."_ He says gently.

"Yes, sir." I hang up before he can say more or before he can hear the sadness in my tone.

I put Elliot's phone in my back pocket and lean against the wall.

He doesn't want more. I thought... I thought I was special since he was taking me to events, I've met his family, we slept in his bed together, we have vanilla sex, we've even made love for his birthday for goodness sake, but I was wrong. He doesn't want more.

Now more than ever I have to protect my heart.

Since I'm here anyway, I go inside the lady's to use the facilities.

As I'm washing my hands, and looking at my reflection in the mirror of this beyond luxurious bathroom, I'm wondering why I told him I would go home. I have every right to hang out with my friends on the weekends that I'm not his... _Submissive_. It's what we agreed upon, right.

With that mindset, I walk out of the restroom intent to party with my friends.

When I walk back to our table, José is sitting alone.

"What took you so long?" He asks as soon as I sit down, handing me my drink.

"I was in line for the restroom." I lie. "Where is everyone?" I ask him as I take a huge drink of my cocktail.

"They're dancing." He nods to the dance floor so I look.

Kate with Elliot and Steph with Chad, both couples are practically sexing it up as they move.

I continue to drink and drink and drink, ignoring the buzzing going on in my back pocket.

I've danced with and without my girls, I've drank well over my limit, and now I'm really starting to feel the effects of the alcohol take effect.

I feel dizzy, really dizzy, and I need some air.

I let everyone know I'll be right back and where I'm going.

I step outside on a huge empty balcony, being sure to stay away from the edge as lean against the wall, taking deep cleansing breaths.

"Ana?" I look behind me when I hear José and see him come out to join me.

"Hey, José." I slur his name.

"Are you okay?"

"Yeah, I'm fine. I guess I just had a bit too much to drink."

"Me too." He murmurs, standing closer to me.

"José, what are you doing?" I ask when wraps his arm around me, holding his hand on the small of my back.

"I want to kiss you." He tells me in a husky tone.

"No way, José." I giggle.

"Ana, I like you. I've liked you for a long while. I just wasn't brave enough to tell you before, but now that you and Garrett are done-"

"José, no." I tell him serious now, interrupting and pushing him weakly away. "I don't like you like that. You're my friend. We're just friends."

"Please, Ana. One kiss." His eyes go straight to my lips and darken as he leans down, tilting my chin up.

"No, José, stop." I continue to try and push him away as I pull my head away from him.

"I believe the lady said no." José quickly releases me, and takes a huge step back, as if he wasn't trying to shove his tongue down my reluctant throat.

I feel someone behind me pull me back and away from José.

"Garrett." José growls at his intruder.

 _Chad?_

"Rodríguez." It's definitely Chad, and his tone is much more threatening than José's. "I knew you were trouble the minute Anastasia introduced me to you. Is this the level you stoop too? Wait until she's drunk and force yourself on her? Someone should teach you some manners and how to respect a lady."

"I wasn't forcing myself."

"She told you no!" Chad roars, grabbing onto me when I sway, and holding me up.

"It was just a kiss." José defends himself.

"She said NO." Chad repeats in his Dominant don't fuck with me voice. "Kiss or not. She. Said. NO. That's fucking forcing yourself."

"I've been drinking, I wasn't thinking."

"That rhymes." I giggle, swaying again so Chad keeps holding me up.

"You're not drunk, José, you've barely drank all night." Chad continues, ignoring me and my silly drunkenness. "You've been starring your sad little eyes at Anastasia since day one, hoping she will look your way, hoping she will be yours, but she never will. It seriously pisses me the fuck off when a man tries to take advantage of a woman. She doesn't want you! Get that through your fucking head. She's with someone and it ain't you. It will never be you."

"She told me you broke up."

"We did. But that doesn't mean you can take advantage of her. She's with someone else. And you're lucky he's not here right now, because I highly doubt he'd let you see the light of day again for what you just tried to do to his girl. That fucker doesn't care who you are, he will ruin you without a second thought."

"She's my friend."

"Not anymore. Not after what you tried to pull."

"That's not up to you."

"If you come near her again, _I will kick your ass_." Chad threatens in his Dom voice.

"Whatever." José mumbles and walks back inside.

"Anastasia." I hear Chad try to gain my attention, holding onto my arms, so I try to focus on him. "Ana. Are you okay?"

"Yesss." I slur, nodding and swaying. "I'm fine."

"Let's get you out of here, sweetheart. I'll take you home-"

"Chad?" I look on the ground where Chad is now laying after a fist collided with his jaw.

 _Oh my god! Did José hit him?!_

I see a flash of gray, smell a very irresistible scent that makes me miss Christian, and soon Chad and José are going at it.

I didn't think José could take Chad, but he seems to be doing the job.

"Stop! Stop!" I try to get José off Chad.

Chad is giving it as good as he's getting it, though.

I feel buzzing in my back pocket so I take out my phone, but when I do, it's not my phone in my hand, it's Elliot's.

I end the incoming call without checking who it is, as I wouldn't know who was calling anyway, and call Kate's phone.

 _"Hello?"_

"Kate! I need Elliot! I'm on the balcony. Hurry!" I relay my message and hang up without waiting for her to respond.

I try to stop Chad and José again only to stop myself when I hear José speak, only it's not José, it's Christian.

"I told you to stay the fuck away from her!" Christian growls as his fist collides with Chad's face.

"I was helping her!" Chad shouts right back, hitting Christian now.

"By taking advantage of her?!" Christian goes towards Chad again.

"Christian?" I ask confused.

He's supposed to be in Portland until at least tomorrow night and I just got off the phone with him.

 _How is he here right now? Or am I just really, really drunk that I'm imagining him._

Two men rush out, one I recognize as Taylor and the other I've never seen before, but he's dressed similar to Taylor.

 _Why, oh why, do they have to dress like the characters from Men In Black?_

Taylor is trying to hold Christian back as the other Men In Black looking man is holding Chad.

I giggle as I imagine him taking out one of those memory eraser thingys I saw in the movie.

"What's going on?" Elliot asks as he rushes out to the balcony with Kate and Steph following him.

"I don't know." I say honestly. I frown, trying to understand what just happened.

I'm clueless even though I was here the whole time.

I look around for José, but don't see him anywhere.

"Nothing." Christian glares at me then Chad as he shrugs Taylor off of him.

MIB #2 releases Chad when he realizes they have stopped trying to go after each other.

"You've got the wrong idea, Grey." Chad pants as he tells Christian.

"You sure? Because it looked like you were trying to take advantage of Anastasia and take her home when she's drunk."

"What?!" Stephanie and I shout.

"No!" Chad shouts right back, but to Stephanie, not to me. "Look, this is all one big cluster-fuck. That fucker José was trying to kiss Anastasia when I came to check on her. She told him no but he wouldn't take no for an answer so I told him to fuck off, then innocently offered to take Anastasia home because she's obviously wasted. That's when Grey came in."

As Chad was talking, explaining what happened, I felt as if I was dreaming or drifting in and out of consciousness. And the next thing I know I'm being wrapped in arms that tingle and the last thing I hear is Christian before everything turns black.

"Fuck!"


	21. (21) Is This What You Want?

**APOV**

I groan, with a terrible headache. Since I don't want to wake, I turn on my side, pull the pillow next to me a little closer and burry my face. As soon as I inhale, my eyes pop wide open, only for me to quickly shut them because of the bright light.

Christian's scent is on my pillow. I flip on my front and squint as I look around the room I am in. I almost thought I would wake up at Escala, because of his scent on my pillow, but I'm in my room in the apartment I share with Kate. And I'm alone.

 _How did I get here?_

When I look at my side table, it feels as if I woke in the story _Alice's Adventures in Wonderland_. There are two tablets with a note that says _'Eat Me'_ , a glass of orange juice with a note that says _'Drink Me'_ , and an envelope that says _'Read Me'_ all in neat cursive handwriting that I recognize to be Christian's.

My head is pounding, so I sit up and take the tablets, drinking nearly half the glass of orange juice.

Just as I'm reaching for the envelope there is a knock on my door and it opens before I can say anything.

"Hey, you." Kate says with only her head poking through.

Since she sees I am awake she enters my room completely, shutting the door behind her, and getting on the bed next to me.

"How are you feeling?" She asks as she gets under the blankets with me. "I've been given specific instructions to check on you every half hour until you woke."

"I have a major headache." I admit. I suspect Christian told her to check on me. _Speaking of,_ "Where is Christian?"

"He had some business to attend to, but he wouldn't give me anymore information than that."

"What happened last night?"

"Before or after you passed out? Or both?"

"After." I answer her. "I vaguely remember Christian and Chad fighting."

"Yeah, they were brawling last night and both look pretty messed up. Grey showed up at club last night and thought Garrett was going to take advantage of you so he kicked his ass, but Chad got in a few good hits as well, mostly defensive. I sure wouldn't want to be on the wrong side of Christian Grey. Not only does he have a lot of influence in Seattle, but he sure can whip some ass for a businessman. Elliot said Christian's into kickboxing, has a professional trainer and everything."

Bits of last night come back to me.

"José." I growl when I remember he tried to kiss me when I told him no.

"I'm going to have that fucker's balls for earrings!" Kate shouts and means it. "He's the one who tried to take advantage of you and he gets away Scott-free while Chad and Christian, the two protecting you, get the shit beat out of them, by each other no less. You forgive people too easily, Steele, and that's great that you don't hold grudges, but you need to hold your ground with him. There's no telling what that fucker could have done."

"I know. I'm very upset with him, and I'm seriously reconsidering our friendship right now."

I can't believe José did that. We've been friends for four years. I always knew he liked me, but I didn't think he would ever do _that_.

"So what happened after I passed out?" I have never been that drunk before, and I vow to never do it again.

"Well, we all left. Christian carried you out of the club through a back entrance. Chad took Stephanie home, I rode back here with Elliot, and Christian brought you home in his SUV that some guy was driving. But before that, Chad explained everything that happened to Christian, and he didn't even thank or apologize to Chad after he learned what happened."

"I suspect he's wanted to hit him for awhile now, just for being my ex. Heck, I wanted to hit him for leaving me stranded awhile back."

"What?! He left you stranded?!"

 _Oh, did I forget to mention that to Kate?_

"He and I got into an argument on the way to José's show, that I never made it to by the way. Chad caught me messaging Christian while I was with him, and Chad was trying to reconcile. He obviously got upset, and rightfully so. We weren't even broken up for a week and I was already messaging another guy."

"Wow, Ana, that's a bold move."

"I wasn't thinking, I was just so caught up with _Fif_ \- I mean, Christian that I just... totally forgot Chad was even in the car with me. We had broken up, so I didn't see it as betraying him in anyway, but Chad didn't see it that way. He got jealous, I got out of his car, and he took off after I told him to leave me alone. He came back not even 5 minutes later and if I wasn't so relieved," _And scared out of my mind._ "I probably would have snapped on him. It's in the past, but Christian's now the jealous one. I just don't understand why he's so jealous."

He's fucked hundreds of women, and still has their numbers I'm sure. How else did he call Stephanie? I'm not jealous, and I'm friends with _his_ ex for goodness sake. Okay, when I first saw Stephanie, I admit, I did get a little territorial, but I've moved passed that and we're now friends. And because of that, I have been staying away from Chad, so Christian doesn't feel the way I felt when I first saw Steph. The only reason why Chad was there last night, was because Stephanie invited him, not me.

"Men are territorial like that." Kate explains.

I shrug, looking down and see I'm no longer wearing what I wore last night.

"Did you change me?"

"Christian did." Kate tells me. "I would have if he wasn't your boyfriend, but since he is, I didn't think you would mind. He even stayed here last night to keep an eye on you, which is really sweet if you ask me, but he left early this morning. He actually just left not too long before I came in."

"He's not my boyfriend." I murmur sadly.

"Oh, no! Did you two break up?"

"No, nothing like that. He has commitment issues," Is the only thing I can think of. "And he doesn't want to label our relationship."

"I don't understand. I thought you said he was your boyfriend?"

"I never said he was my boyfriend. I just told you I met him online and we decided to try for more."

"As in sex?"

I nod.

"Ana..." She trails off, whining my name.

I look down, knotting my fingers together.

"I think... I think I'm falling for him." I finally admit out loud.

"Have you told him?"

I shake my head. _I can't_.

"Why don't you tell him? You have to know that man has the same feelings. Elliot said he's never seen his brother act this way towards a woman before."

Elliot's never seen him act this way towards a woman before because he's never seen Christian with a woman. Christian keeps his lifestyle and Submissives a secret from his family. I'm not even sure why he brought me to his parents house and introduced me to them. He even let them assume I'm his girlfriend, when clearly that's not what he wants.

"It's so obvious Christian cares for you." Kate continues.

"He does." I agree with her because it's true. He told me he would be devoted to me, but surely he tells that to every Sub.

"So why don't you talk to him?"

"I did." _Kind of_. "I asked him if he wanted to be my boyfriend and he said no."

"Sweetie." I wrap my arms around Kate when she holds me.

 _ **~..~..~**_

After I'm showered, dressed, and ate some dry toast, because it's all I can handle right now, I go back to my bedroom to finally read the note inside the envelope that I never got the chance to do when I woke. I sit on my bed and grab the envelope, taking out the note inside, written in Christian's handwriting.

 _Anastasia,_

 _I hope you're feeling better.  
I'd like you to come to Escala today._  
 _As soon as it's convenient for you._  
 _We need to talk._

 _Christian._

I put the note back inside the envelope and grab my phone to look at all the missed calls, messages, and voicemails I missed last night. I have missed calls and voicemails from Christian last night while I was at the club, and a missed call last night and this morning from José, as well as voice messages and texts from the two. I decide to read through my text messages first.

 _ **What are you doing, Anastasia? -C**_

The time he sent this is when we had just arrived at the club and Chad showed up.

 _ **Call me! -C**_

 _ **Anastasia, if you don't call me, I'll be forced to call Elliot. -C**_

I reread that message again and again.

 _How did he know I was with Elliot?_

The only time I saw Elliot with his phone was when he gave it to me with the call from Christian.

 _ **Ana, I'm sorry about last night. Forgive me? -J**_

I roll my eyes at my so-called friend's message.

I ignore José's message, as I try to think of how to deal with him, and send Christian a message.

 **Thanks for taking care of me last night. Yes, we need to talk. I can be at Escala in 10 minutes, if you so wish, sir. -A**

He replies instantly.

 _ **I will see you in 10. -C**_

From his message, I can't tell what kind of mood he's in. I decided to pack my overnight bag anyway, just incase.

I say goodbye to Kate, letting her know where I'm going and that I may not be home tonight, then leave.

I know what I want to talk to him about... How he knew I was at the club... How he knew I stayed... But what does he want to talk to me about?

 _Oh god, I hope I didn't say anything to him about 'more' when I was stupefied with drink! Surely anything I said can't be held against me._

It doesn't take me long to pull into Escala's underground parking.

I take a deep calming breath before I exit my vehicle and walk towards the elevator.

When the elevator doors open in the penthouse apartment's foyer, I'm a little shocked to see Christian waiting for me instead of Taylor.

I get a look at his face that clearly shows he's been in an altercation; with his busted lip and small cut on his cheek bone.

Even though we agreed to only exchange power in the Playroom, I bow my head Submissively in the presence of my _Master_ , and I walk towards him, standing directly in front of him.

"How are you feeling?" He asks me gently.

"Better than I deserve, sir." I answer him.

"Look at me, Anastasia."

I look up, but try to avoid eye contact like the contract advised me; _the Submissive shall not look at the Dominant_.

"Would you like to explain to me why you stayed out after you told me you would go home?" He's in full Dom-mode.

"Would you like to explain to me how you knew I was out?" I reply defiantly.

I know he's glaring at me, but I choose to ignore it.

"Elliot." Is all he says, clenching his jaw, eyes blazing now.

"Bullshit!" I call, finally looking at him. "I was with Elliot and not once did he look at his phone or take a phone call until you called him, that, and you sent me a text message asking what I was doing as soon as we arrived at the club, which leads me to believe you knew _exactly_ what I was doing as you've never just sent a text asking what I was doing before. Furthermore, you knew I stayed after I said I would leave, how?!"

He opens his mouth to speak but I interrupt him before he says anything.

"Don't you dare lie to me, Christian. You said you wouldn't lie to me, and I know you didn't talk to Elliot after we spoke because I had his phone. Now tell me the truth!"

"I am your Dom. You are my Submissive." He growls, his voice is rough and demanding.

Those words have never hit me so hard. It feels as if someone has punch me in my chest.

"I don't have to explain myself to you!" He roars, glaring, and towering over me. " _You_ need to explain yourself to _me_. You said you would go _home_ , yet you stayed, why? And don't give me one of your smart mouthed answers, Anastasia!"

"I-" I try to stay in control of my emotions and blink away the hurt I feel. "I changed my mind."

"You changed your mind?" He asks, staying Dominant.

"Yes. It's what we do as humans. We change our minds."

"You lied." He accuses me, glaring and stepping closer.

"I _changed_ my mind." I step closer as well, not backing down.

We stare at each other for a long while, neither breaking eye contact, until he finally breaks our silence.

"I want you upstairs in the Playroom in fifteen minutes for your punishment." He orders me and tries to walk away, but I grab his arm, stopping him.

He looks at my hand on his arm then at me, and I can see the Dominant still lingering in his eyes.

"We agreed to power exchange only in a scene." I remind him as I remove my hand from his arm.

"You broke a rule, Ms. Steele." He says in his Dominant tone. "You're going to be punished."

"I didn't break a rule. We don't have any rules."

"We do. We may not have very many but I believe you agreed to obedience and personal safety." He reminds me. "Last night you put yourself at risk, did you not?"

"I-" _Shit, he's right!_ "I was fine, I was with my friends."

"Your friends. What about the _friend_ that tried to force himself on you?"

"It... It was just a misunderstanding. Besides, Chad interfered before anything could happen."

"Either way, you've earn a punishment. Playroom. Ten minutes now." He leaves me, without a second glance my way, standing in the foyer alone.

I take a deep breath and decided to just go with it. It is what I signed up for after all.

As I'm walking up the stairs to the bedroom he gave me, the bedroom I'm sure he gives to all his Submissives, I realize he never told me how he knew I was out or how he knew I stayed out after I told him I would go home. He said he doesn't answer to me because he's my Dominant and I am his Submissive.

 _If it's a Submissive he wants, it's a Submissive he's going to get_.

I can't lose him, so if I never tell him I'm falling for him, that I want more; I wont lose him. _Right?_

I hurry to get ready once I'm in the Submissive suite, putting on a pair of sexy panties, braiding my hair the way he likes it, then grabbing the robe and go to the Playroom to wait for my Dominant to punish me for my infractions last night.

Once I'm inside the Playroom, I hang the robe on the back of the door, get into the Submissive pose near the door, and I get into my Sub-mode while I wait for my Dominant.

It takes him well over ten minutes to enter. It felt as if I was waiting an hour or more.

I can see the frayed edges of his sexy distressed jeans that he wears in his Playroom.

I'm less nervous about this punishment because my last punishment felt so good. So good that I'd be naughty again just to receive that punishment again, however, this time he's more upset with me it seems and I'm not entirely sure why. Last time, I left him. This time, I got drunk and stayed out with my friends. Surely that can't be worse, can it?

"Stand." I hear his demand and do as I'm told.

I feel him walk around me, standing behind me. He moves my braid to my shoulder.

"Why are you being punished, Ms. Steele?"

"For going out with my friends, sir." I reply sarcastically.

 _smack_

He slaps my ass.

"Try again."

"For changing my mind, sir." Another sarcastic reply.

 _smack_

He slaps my ass again.

"Try again."

"For _lying,_ sir?" I guess, emphasizing, at what he wants to hear, and rolling my eyes, though he doesn't see this.

He doesn't slap my ass this time so I assume I'm correct, however, I didn't lie. Instead he wraps my braid around his hand, pulling me back to him, then running his nose just behind my ear. He snakes his other hand around to my front holding me to him.

"You have a very smart mouth, Ms. Steele, perhaps I should punish that too. You're being punished for not notifying me of your changed plans. For putting yourself at risk. For-" He stops from continuing. "Do you remember the first paddle you chose?"

 _I wonder why he stopped from continuing to list my misdemeanors_.

"Y-yes, sir." I end up stuttering as I remember the paddle he said wasn't for me because it would be too painful.

"Go get it."

He releases his hold of me so that I may obey his orders.

I wasn't nervous before, but now I am, as I hesitantly walk towards the paddles, canes, belts, and other implements used to punish.

With a shaky hand, I grab the paddle.

Before I turn around, I feel his hands on my hips, then he grasps my panties, pulling them from my body, destroying them and tossing them in front of me on the floor.

"Turn around." He demands.

When I turn around he's standing directly behind me, holding his hand out. I keep my head bowed, place the paddle in his hand, and await further instructions.

"Bend over." He instructs me, pointing towards his bench with the paddle in his hand.

I obey.

"I'm going to hit you 10 times, Ms. Steele."

 _10!_ I stay quiet.

"Remember your safe words."

 _SMACK!_

He hits me hard before he's even finished his sentence.

"Ahh!" I cry out.

"Quiet." He reprimands me. "Unless you need to safeword, I want you quiet. Will you notify me of your plans if you change them, Ms. Steele?"

"Yes, sir."

 _SMACK!_

He hits me just as hard as before and I try not to cry out this time. It's more painful than my last punishment, but it's nothing compared to the belt Chad used. I can do this, it's just more of the reason why I'm being punished more than anything that has me upset.

"Will you drink to excess again, putting yourself at risk, Ms. Steele?"

"No, sir."

 _SMACK!_

"Will you lie to me again, Ms. Steele?"

"I didn't-"

 _SMACK!_

"Answer me."

"No, sir!" I shout at him. A tear escapes as I give him the answer he wants to hear.

I don't know how much longer I can take, this is nothing like my last punishment and it's really starting to hurt. He said 10 and this is only the 4th spanking. There's nothing pleasurable about this punishment. I told him I don't like punishments, he told me punishments are supposed to hurt, but I don't like it.

 _Do I stop him?_

I didn't stop Chad and look what happened. I can't lose Christian. I can't.

I decide to take the punishment. It's a part of the lifestyle I want, and it's not that bad, I just don't like it. If it becomes too much, I will safeword.

I brace myself for the next blow but it doesn't come.

"Do you need to safeword?" He checks gently, dropping his Dominance.

"No, sir." I sniff.

"Anastasia."

"I'm fine, sir."

I hear something hit the floor with a bounce then I feel Christian pull me to stand, cupping my face with his hands. I try not to look at him, but it's proving difficult with his hands tipping my head back so I close my eyes.

"Anastasia, you need to safeword if you need to safeword."

"I'm fine, sir." I try not to sniff but it's a necessity.

"No, you're not. As your Dominant, it's my job to ensure you are. I can tell by your body that you're not fine. You _need_ to safeword, Anastasia. If it's too much, you need to safeword. I don't want to lose you."

I don't want to lose him either so I stay quite, ever the Submissive, because he didn't ask a question or give me permission to speak.

"Talk to me." He almost begs, his hands still cupping my face as his thumbs wipe my tears.

"I'm being punished." I say void of the emotion I feel, staying in Sub-mode, with my eyes remaining closed so I'm not forced to look him in his beautiful grey eyes. "I'm not meant to like it, sir." I repeat what he told me in one of our chats.

"That's true, but you are still able to safeword if you need to and I know you needed to safeword."

I stay quiet with my eyes closed and keep them closed when I feel him move away from me.

The next thing I feel is fabric covering me and I know it's my robe.

I want to ask what he's doing, but I stay in Sub-mode, not speaking.

I assist him in helping me into my robe.

"We're done with the scene, Anastasia." He tells me but I stay in Sub-mode.

 _Great!_ _He's ending our scene because I'm a failure at this lifestyle. I'm a wannabe amateur who can't take the punishments my Dominants dish out._ _And here I was, worried he would end our relationship if he found out I was falling for him, now he's sure to end our relationship since I'm not Submissive enough_.

Perhaps if I show him I'm the Sub he wants, he wont end this; our relationship. This is what he wants; a Sub.

He takes me by my arm and leads me out of the Playroom and to my Submissive bedroom, all while neither one of us says a word.

In the bathroom he removes my robe and rubs arnica cream on my behind.

After he's finished, he takes me back out to the bedroom and goes into the walk-in closet, coming back with gray sweats and a blush pink T-shirt. More adorable and expensive than any of mine.

"How are you feeling?" He ask as he helps me into fresh underwear and the clothes.

"I'm fine, sir." And I really am.

It hurt but I could take the pain, it was nothing like being hit with a belt, that's for sure, although I am grateful that he stopped.

"Anastasia, we're no longer in a scene." He reminds me.

"I know, sir." I keep up my Sub-mode, addressing him properly and head bowed.

This is what he wants from me.

I hear him sigh, and I know he's running his fingers through his sexy copper hair, but I don't dare look up.

"Lunch in 30 minutes." He says before he leaves the room.

 _Is he saying lunch will be ready in 30 minutes, or I'm to fix lunch and have it ready in 30 minutes?_

 _Well, at least he didn't end our relationship. Yet._

I sigh as I plop down on the bed, flinching since my ass stings, and putting my head in my hands with my elbows resting on my thighs.

 _How am I going to do this?_ I want to be with him, but being with him makes me want _more_. How did his other Subs last so long, we've barely been together long enough to know each other, yet here I am, already falling.

 _They didn't last long, Ana,_ My subconscious taunts _. He ended their contract as soon as they mentioned the M word_.

I never thought the four letter word, more, could be so powerful.

Maybe I should just tell him how I feel. If he ends the contract, better it ends now than later down the road when I've fallen completely and irrevocably in love with him. I'll probably turn into some psycho-ex-stalker-Sub if I wait too long to tell him and he ends this relationship, or wait on pins and needles for him to figure it out and ends our relationship because of it. However, if he feels the same, we can move forward with our relationship and not just as Dom/Sub.

 _Who are you trying to fool?! He told you LAST NIGHT he didn't want you to be his girlfriend_.

 _ **~..~..~**_

 **CPOV**

 _I need Flynn!_

I leave Anastasia in her room, and go to my study to call Flynn.

I don't know what the fuck just happened, but I was completely flaccid while punishing her, and when I saw her tears, my chest was hurting. I've made plenty of Submissives cry without a fucking care and still fucked them after their punishment, but why when I saw Anastasia's tears, did I feel...

I knew she didn't like being punished and I didn't like it either, for some strange fucking reason.

Nobody enters my office unannounced or without permission, but since Anastasia is here and I'll be discussing her with Flynn, I don't want her to open the door and hear anything she shouldn't, so once inside my office, I lock the door then sit behind my desk to call Flynn.

 _"Hello, Christian."_ Flynn answers my call.

"Flynn." I greet him.

 _"What can I help you with today?"_

"Anastasia."

I've already had a whole session dedicated to Anastasia on Tuesday. I've told Flynn all about her and what has been happening.

It was one of my most intense sessions, and that's saying something.

He knows she's only my Submissive in the Playroom, during a scene. I've told him I'm giving her more than I have any other Sub before. I don't control her outside of the Playroom, she speaks her mind, she uses my given name, we have vanilla sex, in my fucking bed, she sleeps with me and I don't have nightmares when she's there. I've taken her to meet my fucking parents for fuck's sake. By the end of that session, I was left more confused than before. I thought the solution to my problems was to stop acting like a boyfriend and more like her Dominant.

 _"Yes, I remember. What about her?"_

"She makes me... feel."

 _"And what does she make you feel?"_

"Emotions. Unknown emotions I'm not familiar with. I've spent all my adult life trying to avoid any extreme emotions. Yet she... she brings out feelings that are completely alien."

 _"How do you feel about that?"_

"It's very... unsettling."

 _"What emotions are you feeling, Christian?"_

"Sympathy. Jealousy. Unknown emotions I've never felt before."

 _"Love?"_

"No." I say through clenched teeth.

 _"How do you feel when she's around?"_

"I feel happy." I admit. "Overjoyed. Thrilled. Free. Young. Excited. Aroused." I list many of the things I feel when I'm around her.

 _The list is endless_.

 _"And you don't think what you're feeling could be love?"_

"Don't be ridiculous." _Why the fuck does he keep bringing up this love shit?!_ "I told you I don't do love, she can't love me."

 _"Why can't she?"_

"I don't deserve love."

 _"Is this about you being a sadist? Because we've talked about this."_

I don't bother replying to Flynn's sadist remark. We both disagree on the matter, that will never change.

 _"Everyone deserves love, Christian."_

"Not me."

I hear him sign, then continue.

 _"So have decided if you are going to continue to give her more? Make love? This part vanilla, part BDSM relationship?"_

"Of fucking course I am." What a ridiculous question. I'm loving this arrangement, I never want it to change. _Or end._

 _"You wont admit your feelings for her, you claim you don't love her, when it's so obvious that you do, but you should know, if you continue this type of relationship, what's to stop her from falling in love with you?"_

"That wont happen."

 _"You can't control who you fall in love with. Saying you'll never fall in love is like saying you'll never smile. No matter how hard you try, someone will come along and make you. Christian, you can't give her more emotionally, and not expect her to have feelings."_

"Can you just stop with all this love bullshit."

 _"Okay, tell me why you've called, if you're so unconvinced you're falling in love with her. You've already told me she makes you feel things, unknown and alien to you. So I'm sure there's a reason for this call."_

I sigh before I begin. "I was in Portland, scheduled to stay until Sunday morning the latest, but I returned last night, because Sawyer informed me that Anastasia was at a club. He also mentioned that she was with her ex."

 _"You left business matters because she, a submissive, was seeing her ex at a club?"_

"As well as others, including Elliot and her roommate; Katherine." I mention so he doesn't get the wrong idea of her. "I became jealous and tried to call her but she didn't answer my calls or texts so I called Elliot and spoke to her on his phone. Near the end of our conversation, she said she would go home. Not long after we ended the call, Sawyer informed me she was staying and drinking more than before. I ended my business in Portland before finishing and flew _Charlie Tango_ to the Mile High to get Anastasia. When I found her, it seemed as if her ex was going to take advantage of her drunken state, so I beat the shit out of him. He gave it right back. It felt great to finally hit the bastard." I smile as I remember hitting her ex.

 _"You haven't been in a brawl since high school. I'm sure he deserved it for what he was trying to do, however, violence is no way to solve a problem."_

"Actually, he didn't."

 _"He didn't, what?"_

"Deserve the fight. Well, that fight. It turns out, he wasn't trying to take advantage of Anastasia. I admit it felt great to finally hit him, but the reason for wanting to hit him was simple because he's had her."

 _"I'm not sure I follow."_

"I showed up near the end and only heard the tail-end of their conversation. Apparently he was helping her. Another male friend of hers tried to force a kiss and she told him no, but the fucker wouldn't take no for an answer so Garrett stepped in. I didn't see that, I only heard Garrett offering to take her home. I didn't think, I just reacted. We ended up throwing punches until Taylor and Sawyer broke us up. That's when Elliot, Katherine, and Stephanie came out on the balcony."

 _"Stephanie?"_

"Ms. Addams, a former Submissive of mine."

 _"A previous Submissive?"_ I could just imagine Flynn's face. _"She was with your brother?"_

My Submissives are forbidden to have _any_ contact with my family, but I guess I have to make an exception here. Anastasia and Stephanie are becoming friends, as many Subs do, and Anastasia's roommate is fucking my brother so it's inevitable that Stephanie would meet my brother. Anastasia didn't introduce Stephanie to my brother as my ex or to harm me so there's no issue here.

"Actually, she was with Anastasia." I tell him. "They've become friends."

 _"Interesting. She's okay with you having an ex, and has even made friends with her, yet you can't look passed the one ex she has."_

"Anyway," I continue not wanting to discuss that. "I took Anastasia home and stayed with her until morning, until her roommate woke. I had her roommate look in on her and I left. I had to deal with the aftermath of leaving Portland sooner than planned. Anastasia came to Escala... I planned to punish her."

 _"Planned to?"_

"I did."

 _"What for? Hanging out with her ex?"_

"No." I growl. "She told me she would go home. She stayed and drank well passed her limit, putting herself in danger."

 _"I see."_

"Only I couldn't do it."

 _"Do what?"_

"Punish her. I started to... I was getting into it, only I couldn't finish. I wasn't even getting aroused for fuck's sake."

 _"Why is that?"_

"I don't know. I just felt I was hurting her. I never want to hurt her."

 _"You've said before, punishments are suppose to be painful. If you were punishing her, it would be painful. Why stop?"_

"I told you. I never want to hurt her. It was hurting us both."

 _"It hurt her physically. How did it hurt you?"_

"Emotionally."

 _"The alien emotions she brings out of you."_ He repeats what I told him. _"Why don't you try for a more... romantic relationship with this girl? See where it goes."_

"No, I don't do romance. I told her that, she knows this."

 _"Try it."_ He suggests.

"I don't want romance." I growl. "I want a Submissive!"

 _~knock~knock~knock~_

"I have to go."

 _"I'd like to see you in my office next week, Christian."_

"Sure." I end the call and get up to answer the door.

Anastasia is standing on the other side of the door, head bowed submissively, hands clasped in front.

"Lunch is served, sir."

I frown confused by her behavior as we've agreed to only a power exchange in the Playroom or during a scene. I've gotten use to hearing her call me by my given name. I like it. _Why is she acting this way?_ I told her we were no longer in a scene.

"Anastasia, we're not in a scene." I remind her.

She stays quiet. Submissive.

"Let's have lunch." I say to fill the silence.

We walk together towards the kitchen. I want to hold her hand but she still has them clasped together in front of her with her head bowed.

I sit at the breakfast, she sits after she's served me, and together we begin eating the lunch she made us.

Gail left cold cuts in the fridge for sandwiches. I planned to have that for lunch, but a hot meal is always preferred.

"Thank you." I tell her.

"How was your week?" I ask after awhile of silence. I haven't heard from her since Tuesday morning.

"It was fine, sir." She doesn't elaborate.

I drop my fork, a little upset that she's still in the Submissive role.

"Anastasia," I wipe my mouth before I begin. "What's wrong?"

"Nothing, sir." She continues to eat, not looking at me, staying Submissive.

"Is this about your punishment?"

"No, sir."

"Then why the fuck are you still acting like a Sub?"

"I thought this is what you wanted, sir."

"Well, it's not." I grumble, petulantly, like a toddler not getting his way.

"You want a Submissive." She points out. "I am your Submissive. You've made that abundantly clear."

"Anastasia, I..."

She's right, I do want a Submissive, however, I've enjoyed the relationship we have.

My words to Flynn come back to bite me. _'I want a Submissive!'_. Yet, I don't like it.

Running my hand through my hair, I continue.

"We agreed only to power exchange in a scene." I repeat, reminding her.

"Yes, sir. However, I am your Submissive. This is what you want; A Submissive. And that is what I am to you; A Submissive."

"I don't want-" I abruptly halt from saying anything more. "We agreed that you're only my Submissive in a scene." I repeat, stressing this.

"What do you want from me?" She finally looks at me.

 _What do I want from her?_

"More." I blurt out before I can stop myself.


	22. (22) I Want More, I Need More

**CPOV**

"I thought this is what you wanted, sir."

"Well, it's not." I grumble, petulantly, like a toddler not getting his way.

"You want a Submissive." She points out. "I am your Submissive. You've made that abundantly clear."

"Anastasia, I..."

She's right, I do want a Submissive, however, I've enjoyed the relationship we have.

My words to Flynn come back to bite me. _'I want a Submissive!'_. I've only ever wanted a Submissive. Yet, I don't like it.

Running my hand through my hair, I continue.

"We agreed only to power exchange in a scene." I repeat, reminding her.

"Yes, sir. However, I am your Submissive. This is what you want; A Submissive. And that is what I am to you; A Submissive."

"I don't want-" I abruptly halt from saying anything more. "We agreed that you're only my Submissive in a scene." I repeat, stressing this.

"What do you want from me?" She finally looks at me.

 _What do I want from her?_

"More." I blurt out before I can stop myself.

 _Fuck!_

"More?" She questions the meaning. "More, what?"

"I want your Submission in the Playroom, but I want you to be you outside of the Playroom." I tell her what I've never offered a previous Sub.

It's what we've been doing, and I don't want it to change. _Why is she acting differently?_

"That's what we're doing now, so that's not more. You said you want me to be your Submissive so I am trying to be what you want me to be, what the contract states, that's what you said you wanted. Now you're saying you want more, but you don't want more? You're so confusing. I don't understand what you want from me."

"You. I want you, Anastasia."

"Me?"

I nod.

"Last night you told me you didn't want to move forward with our relationship, that you didn't want to be my boyfriend. Have you changed your mind?"

I can only shake my head, negatively.

"So you're basically saying you want to be friends with benefits?"

"That's fine." I can be her friend.

"Well, it's not for me. I don't want that."

"Anastasia, what do _you_ want from _me,_ specifically?" I repeat her question to me as I run my fingers through my hair.

"I agreed to be your Submissive, but. I-" She pauses to take a deep breath. "I want more, I need more."

"I _am_ giving you more." _Does she not realize that I am?_ "Tell me what _you_ want, Anastasia."

"I'm too afraid." She looks away from me.

"Afraid?" _What is she afraid of?_ "Afraid of what?" I ask.

"I'm afraid to say anything because I don't want to you to end our relationship."

"I will _never_ end our relationship." I express sincerely, sounding every bit of the possessive man that I am with her. "Talk to me."

She looks back at me, biting her lip in contemplation. As much as it turns me on to see her do this, I know now is not the time. When she releases her lip, she looks as if she's come to a conclusion. My heart is beating so fast as I wait for her to tell me what's bothering her.

"I'm falling for you." She barely whispers.

 _She's falling for me?! As in, falling in love with me?! Shit! NO! Flynn was right!_

"I know you feel something too," She accuses me. "I can see it in your eyes."

I can't speak. I can't think. _She's falling for me_.

"It's fine if you don't feel the same," She continues when I don't respond, coming to her own conclusion about how I feel. "And we'll continue our Dom/Sub only relationship, however, if we continue, I don't want any contact with you outside of our scenes. If... If you want to end our 'relationship' because I'm falling for you, and will only continue to fall, I'll understand and I'll leave."

 _Leave?!_

"I don't want you to go." I finally choke out, trying and failing to sound in control of my emotions.

"I don't want to go." Relief floods through me.

 _What do I do?_ If I want to keep her, I have two options:

Option 1; Give her the romance she's asking me for. The romance I don't do, can't do.  
Option 2; Only have a Dom/Sub relationship with no contact outside of our scenes.

She's been a Submissive outside the Playroom for 5 fucking minutes and already I don't like it. _Why?_

"I guess it's no surprise what my dark secret is, is it?" She brings me from my thoughts. "Although, it's more light than dark."

"What's that?"

"That I'm a hopeless romantic."

Her revelation has me sighing in defeat. _Fuck!_ There's no solution. We're both not getting what we want. She wants romance and I want... _what do I want?_ I thought I wanted a Submissive, yet when she's Submissive, I don't like it. There's no win/win for me. I don't want romance and I don't want her as a Submissive... _W_ _hat the fuck do I want?!_

"Can't we just continue the relationship we have?" I ask, almost pleading. "Dom/Sub in scene, friends when not." Like the friends with benefits she suggested.

"Christian, I'm going to be honest with you. I've told you I'm falling for you. I've told you I want more. I've also told you if you don't want more, that's fine, and gave you some options. Those options are not to hurt you but to protect me from getting hurt. If we continue the relationship we have now, I'm only going to fall harder. I can either give you my all and we embark on a romantic relationship... boyfriend/girlfriend with kink mixed in, or we only do the Dom/Sub relationship with no other contact so that I'm not around sweet loving Christian. I'm sorry, but you'll have to choose. I can leave to give you some time to think about it."

"No," I say quickly, almost in a panic, in response to her ridiculous suggestion. "I don't want you to leave."

"Okay. I wont leave. Do you want me to go upstairs, to the bedroom you gave me, to give you some time to think?"

I don't answer her because I don't know what to say.

"I'm going to give you a moment."

I grab her arm as she stands, afraid she's going to leave.

"I'll just be upstairs." She reassures me when she sees the panic look I no doubt have on my face.

She cups her hand on my cheek, and I lean my head towards her touch, closing my eyes. I feel her lips press against mine in a chaste gentle kiss, then she moves away from me, and walks out of the room.

I continue to watch her movements, making sure she's really going upstairs, until I can no longer see her.

Now more than ever, I need to talk to Flynn.

 _Can I not do anything without him?!_

 _"Christian, this is a surprise to hear from you so soon."_ He answers the call I make while walking back to my study.

"I need help."

 _"I would presume so. I'm here to help as best I can."_ I finally reach my office and sit behind my desk.

"Anastasia." Again, the reason I need help from my therapist. "She... You were right, she's falling for me. She's basically giving me an ultimatum."

 _"Such as?"_

"Either I give her the romantic relationship she desires, or we have a Dom/Sub relationship only, with no contact outside of our weekends here."

 _"I see. So it was an easy decision for you."_

"What do you mean?"

It's the most difficult decision I've ever been forced to make. Either I give Anastasia the love I can't, or I lose her but keep the sex.

I would laugh at this ridiculous battle I have to choose from, if it wasn't me that had to choose.

 _"We just ended our conversation, what, five minutes earlier, and you said, and I quote; 'I don't want romance. I want a Submissive.'."_ Is this why he writes shit down? So he can quote me later?! _"Therefore, this must have been an easy decision for you, is what I mean."_

"Just because I don't want romance, doesn't mean I want to lose Anastasia." I growl out, pulling my hair in frustration.

 _"It's not bothered you if you lost a Sub before, in fact, you terminate their contract as soon as the L or M word is spoken. Why haven't you ended Anastasia's?"_

"I- I can't."

 _"Why?"_

"Because I just can't." I growl getting frustrated with him.

 _"Tell me why."_ He pushes.

"I don't want to!"

 _"You don't want to tell me,_ _you don't want to end her contract, or you don't want to admit_ _that you could love her? You've said yourself, you've not felt this before. How do you know it's not love that you're feeling?"_

"It's not." My tone is firm, final.

 _"How do you know?"_ He continues to push me.

"I just do."

 _"You said you made love."_ He tries a different tactic. _"What do you think that means?"_

I run my fingers through my hair, grasping it.

"Look, it was just something I wanted to try as I've never done it before. I don't love. I don't. I _care_ about her."

 _"You've not_ 'cared' _about any other Submissive. What makes her different?"_

"She just is. Are you going to help me or not?!"

 _"I thought I was."_

"Well, you're not."

 _"Alright, why don't you tell me what you need from me."_

"What should I do?"

 _"I can't tell you what to do, Christian, nobody can. What you do is up to you. During our last conversation, only minutes ago, you said you don't want romance and that you want a Submissive. She's giving that to you. I fail to see the dilemma here."_

"So you're saying I should just have a Dom/Sub only relationship with her?"

 _"I'm saying_ YOU _have to decide what_ YOU _want. If you want a Submissive and she's willing... If you want romance and she's willing... It's up to you which route your relationship takes. Personally I think you should try it, but it's ultimately your decision."_

"What the fuck do I pay you for?!" I snap as I hang up.

"Fucking useless charlatan." I mumble as I toss my phone onto my desk and run my hands into my hair, grasping it hard, with my elbows resting on my desk.

I give her more. I make love to her, I introduced her to my parents, I take her out, to events, to dinner, she's allowed to address me by my given name, she sleeps in my bed, she's able to touch, look at me, speak freely without permission. We don't have a TPE relationship for fuck's sake. Yet she wants more, more than I have already given her.

 _What more does she want from me?!_

I knew it was a bad fucking idea to explore vanilla. Now she's had a taste and wants more, so to speak.

Then there's the Dom/Sub only relationship, which would be what I would have preferred and have always preferred, before I got to know Anastasia.

I enjoy our banter, smiling and laughing, our playfulness, vanilla. I never fucking thought I would enjoy vanilla, but I do.

I'm torn. On one hand, I want more, the more we've been enjoying, but I can't give her the more she deserves, and on the other hand, I want a Submissive, but if her punishment in the Playroom, just hours earlier when I couldn't go through with it, is anything to go by, I don't want her to be my Submissive anymore. Well, at least not full time. I want things to remain the same, yet she doesn't.

 _Why the fuck can't we just continue what we have?!_ _What the fuck do I do?!_

Do I end our contract? _No, that's not an option. I need her in my life._

I've never felt like this before. What I feel for her terrifies me.

Do I give her more? _No, that's not an option. I can't be what she wants and she deserves better._

The only option I see working is her being my Submissive only. It's what I've always done, it's what I know, and she's willing to give that to me. I'm a selfish bastard and I want her. If she feels she's falling, this is the only way. We'll need to renegotiate our contract with the rules added this time.

With the solution to our problem solved, I head upstairs to tell her.

When I knock on her door she doesn't answer. Without warning, I throw her door open, with my heart pounding at the thought of her no longer here. I breath a sigh of relief when my eyes land on her. She's curled up on her bed, napping. _How long was I gone?_

Slowly, I walk towards the beautiful brunette and perch myself on the edge of her bed as I stare at her, moving some of her hair out of her face.

 _Why do I have to be so fucked up? I don't deserve her love, but would_ _it really be so bad if she loved me?_

Seeing this as my last opportunity to do so, I lean down and press my lips to hers, savoring her lips on mine. As with our new relationship, I will no longer be able to kiss her. When I pull away from my chaste peck of the sleeping beauty, she begins to stir.

Her lashes begin to flutter and soon I see her big blue beautiful eyes starring at me. I have to look away, for she can see right through me.

"I've come to a conclusion." I tell her.

She stays quiet as she slowly sits up on the bed, waiting patiently for my reply.

I wet my now dry lips and slowly exhale, then I place my forearms on my thighs, clasping my hands together to give me something to focus on.

"I want a Dom/Sub only relationship." I say with determination. I can't look at her as I continue. "With this, I believe we should discuss our contract again and renegotiate some things."

"If that's what you want." I hear her say sadly.

"It is." I don't sound very convinced, perhaps because it's not what I want at all. I want our relationship to remain as it was.

"Would you like to go over the contract again now?" I still can't look at her as I ask.

"What do we need to go over?" She asks. "I thought we already agreed to everything."

"The rules. Our hard limits will remain."

"But I don't want rules."

"They are a part of a Dom/Sub relationship and if we're to do the Dom/Sub only thing, it's essential."

"Well, I'll only be with you every other weekend and no contact throughout the week so I really don't see the need for rules."

"If you are to be my Sub, I want you to follow the rules." I need the control they bring me, as I feel my control dwindle around her.

"Negotiable?" She checks.

"Yes." _Always._ "Shall we?" I stand waiting for her.

"Yes, sir." I already don't like it.

We walk together back to my office and I pull out our contract. I get out a new rules page so we can go over the rules.

"Let's discuss our roles." I say as I read our roles as Dominant and Submissive. "The Dominant shall take responsibility for the wellbeing and the proper training, guidance, and discipline of the Submissive. The Submissive accepts the Dominant as her master, with the understanding that she is now the property of the Dominant, to be dealt with as the Dominant pleases. The Submissive shall serve the Dominant in any way the Dominant sees fit and shall endeavor to please the Dominant at all times to the best of her ability."

"I understand the roles, sir."

"Anastasia," I mutter her name in frustration. "for the purposes of this renegotiation, can you please not refer me as sir."

"Of course, Mr. Grey."

I can't control the glare I give her before I return to the contract.

 _This is what you wanted, Grey_. My subconscious taunts.

"Rules." I continue. "Obedience, we've agreed upon. You are to obey any instruction I give you immediately without hesitation. You will agree to any sexual activity I deem fit and pleasurable. Vanilla included." I add and look at her.

"But vanilla sex isn't BDSM kinky sex."

"It isn't." I agree. "But I deem it pleasurable."

"Understandable, however, my no kissing stands and will now be added to our vanilla scenes."

"Fine." I growl. I already knew she would say that, and I'm not happy about it. "Agreed."

I read the next item on the list, skipping sleep and food since she wont agree to that anyway.

"Clothes."

"You've already bought me clothes."

"I may want to purchase more."

"Fine." She repeats what I've said. "Agreed."

"Exercise. I'll leave that up to you but I want you supple and strong with stamina. I have a personal trainer. I'll give you his number and tell him to expect your call." I say as I hand her Claude's business card.

"Thank you." She accepts his card.

"I'll also leave beauty up to you. I'll pay for any beauty treatments, however, I ask that you not do any major changes without consulting me first."

"Okay."

"Personal safety." I read with a smirk. She told me that wouldn't be a problem and it was.

I'm earned an adorable glare.

"I have no plans to ever get that wasted again."

I nod.

"I'd also like to change our availability to 3 weekends a month instead of every other weekend."

"Okay."

"The next rule is essential to our new relationship. As well as not entering into any sexual relations with anyone other than me, and I will be faithful to you; we will _both_ be monogamous, you will conduct yourself in a respectful and modest manner at all times. Your behavior is a direct reflection on me-"

"How?" She interrupts me. "How will my behavior reflect on you when no one knows of our relationship."

"Fair point well made. However, you will be held accountable for any wrongdoings committed when not in my presence."

"Speaking of... You never disclosed how you knew about last night, furthermore, how will you know if I've done anything 'wrong' when not in your presence?"

"I have my ways."

"I'd be very fascinated in learning how. Please, enlighten me."

"Sawyer." I admit.

"What's a Sawyer?"

"He works for me."

"You're spying on me?!" She shouts, outraged.

"I'm ensuring you're safe as being your Dom states. Sawyer is there to look out for you if you need it."

"I swear I've said this too much today, but bullshit." She looks as if she's remembering something. "The day after I agreed to be yours, I went to lunch with Chad. You knew. Last night I was out with my friends, there was no 'danger'. You use 'Sawyer' to spy on me." She accuses me.

"There was no danger?" I scoff. "You drank to excess last night. Anything could have happened." I ignore her statement about knowing she was having lunch with Garrett. "Your fucking 'friend' tried to force himself on you."

"That all happened _after_ you found out where I was." She points out. "And if you've hired this 'Sawyer' to spy on me, why didn't he intervene when José was trying to kiss me?"

"He said Garrett stopped it before he could. Believe me, I've already laid into him." _I almost fired that fucker._

"I don't like this, Mr. Grey." I involuntarily growl at her formality, but she continues. "You're not allowed to spy on me. If you're worried about my _safety_ while I'm out, this 'Sawyer' can watch me and intervene as needed, however, he's not to report back to you the color of my shoes that day."

"Agreed." I say hesitantly.

"I mean it, Mr. Grey."

"Damn it, Anastasia!" I pound my desk, annoyed that she's not using my given name, causing her to jump.

"I- I just don't see why you need to monitor everything I do when I'm not with you." She says getting the wrong idea of why I'm upset.

"Not that." I make a face as I shake head.

"Then... what? I'm confused at your outburst."

I sigh and rub my face with my hand, ending with rubbing my eyes.

"I want to fuck you." I tell her, instead of the reason I got upset.

She's quiet, not responding.

When I finally look at her she's now in blushing Sub-mode and I don't like it, her being in Sub-mode.

I added vanilla to our list and that's what I want right now.

Standing, I walk around my desk and hold my hand out to her. She immediately places her tiny hand in my larger one, and I pull her to stand.

Keeping her hand in mine, I lead her to my bedroom.

It fucking sucks that she's in Sub-mode and I never thought I would be one to want more, however, I can't give her the more she wants and deserves.

As I stand her, my Submissive, near my bed, I feel... _what?_ I'm not sure, but my dick is completely flaccid. Try as I might, I can't get hard. I've been able to get hard on demand, and with her I'm hard without demanding, without even trying, but he's not waking, try as I might.

I slowly peel her from her clothing like she's a gift, and that doesn't even get me aroused, seeing her naked body before me. However, it's not her body that is not turning me on, it's her in Sub-mode. I feel as if I'm taking advantage of her.

"Look at me." I request gently, wanting her beautiful eyes on me.

I feel my stomach drop when I see the Submissiveness in her eyes. That void of emotion that has always been missing from her normally warm and too bright eyes, is now what I see, and I absolutely hate it. I can't do this.

Trying to recreate our first time, and show her what she means to me, I tilt her chin up and lean down to kiss her.

"Red." She says as she turns her head, my lips landing on her cheek.

"What?" _She safewords for a kiss?_

"I told you my hard limit was kissing, sir, and it is now extended to vanilla scenes due to the nature of our relationship."

"It's just a kiss." I argue innocently.

She said kissing was her hard limit because if I kissed her during a scene she will lose her Submissiveness.

I admit, I was hoping to kiss her and she wouldn't act like a Submissive.

"And for you, it was just touching." She counters. "Yet, you wouldn't let me touch you."

"That's different and you know it."

"Either way, kissing is my hard limit, sir."

"Anastasia." I shake my head. "I want you."

"You have me, sir." Ever the Submissive.

"No. I don't. Not really. I want you. _You_ , Anastasia. I want more. I need more. I want... I want..." _Just say it, Grey!_

"I don't understand, sir."

"I want to see you smile, the way your eyes light up as you do. I want to be the reason you're happy. I enjoy your girlish giggle and your blush, your smart mouth and our banter. I enjoy every fucking moment of it. I don't want you as my Submissive, Anastasia, I want you... I want you as my lover."

Her head snaps up so fast, I'm afraid she got whiplash. She beams at me a mile wide grin and her eyes are now bright and glossy. This gives me this funny tingling in my stomach and increases my heartbeat.

"You..." Fuck she's beautiful. "You want... _more_?"

"Yes." I grin my megawatt smile at her.

"Seriously?!" She continues to question me. Her smile keeps me from being annoyed at the repeated question.

"I'm serious."

"Are- Are you sure this is what you want, Christian?" It feels so good to hear her say my given name again. "Because if-"

"Anastasia," I interrupt her. "I assure you, this is what I want." _More than anything_. "Now... Will you be my girlfriend?"

"Eeek!" She squeals with excitement, jumping on me and wrapping her legs around my waist. "Yes!"

I chuckle as I catch her, spinning her around. I only stop spinning her to kiss her, passionately.

It doesn't take me long to realize she's completely bare and I am still fully clothed, and it takes less time than that for my dick to seek her. The zipper of my jeans, her sex rubbing against my member, it's all too much. I slowly lay her down and rid my clothes.

I climb on top of her to make love to my... my girlfriend.

I grab her hands on instinct as I slowly push myself inside of her.

Our kiss is sweet, passionate. My thrusts are slow and deep with Anastasia meeting me thrust for thrust.

 _Will I never get enough of her?_ I can only hope not.

She moans as I push deeper inside of her, grinding. I bring my hand between us to play with her clit, and groan when her already tight pussy clenches my dick. _Fuck this feels so fucking good_. The feel of her wrapped around me, the sounds she's making, it's all too much. I need her to cum before I explode.

"Anastasia..." I groan, trying to tell her to cum.

"Christian!" Her sex convulses and spasms around my dick, soaking me as she cums.

"Fuck." I grunt, spilling my release into her. "Baby."

I softly kiss her lips as I pull out of her, collapsing next to her on my bed.

Panting and trying to catch my breath, I reach for her, pulling her toward me so I can hold her.

Her back to my front, we lay on my bed, enjoying our post-coital bliss.

I, Christian Grey, have a girlfriend. I finally want more and I want it with Anastasia Steele.

* * *

 **A/N: _Yay! No cliffhanger!_**


	23. (23) Missing Linc

**CPOV**

I'm laying in my bed with Anastasia wrapped in my arms after we've just had incredible morning sex. A perk to sleeping together. She's curled up beside me. I have one arm around her and my other behind my head, enjoying my time with her.

I admit, I'm nervous to allow her in my bed overnight. She's slept with me and I her a few times before, but I'm still nervous if I ever have a nightmare when she's here with me. I still have night terrors when she's not here so it's surely possible to have them while she's here. It hasn't happened yet, but it is possible.

I have warned her of my night-terrors and told her if I have a nightmare to not try and wake me but to leave the room immediately. I have a feeling she wont leave if it happens, and if she doesn't, we won't sleep together anymore. I couldn't bare to hurt her, aside from our controlled play scenes that we both enjoy. If I lashed out at her during a night-terror, it would kill me.

I enjoy sleeping with her though, not only do I receive the most amazing nights sleep ever, but I get to wake up with her in my arms.

You can imagine my surprise when I wake the mornings she's with me to find Anastasia sleeping peacefully next to me, some days she wakes before me, but whatever the circumstances, I always wake without a remembrance of my dream state. It's wonderful. I have had nightmares for as long as I can remember, so it's a welcome change.

Needless to say, that is what leads to me waking my girlfriend and having my wicked way with her.

I still can't fucking believe _I_ have a girlfriend. _A girlfriend!_

There's still a lot we need to discuss about our new relationship and what it entails, but right now, I'm enjoying our lay in. Another rarity for me.

"I've never done this before." I find myself saying.

Thank fuck I didn't blurt out I've never felt like this before. I'm still not sure what to think of her falling for me. I know don't deserve her, I should let her go, but I can't.

"What?" She asks as she plays with my 'happy trail' as she called it last night.

My dick is already starting to harden with the arousal I feel as her hands touch me so freely.

We're both laying naked, only the sheets covering our bits, so it would take less than a fraction of a second to flip her and fuck her.

We just had sex, and I already want more.

"This." I say like it's obvious. "I've never had a girlfriend before, Anastasia, so I don't know what I'm doing and I'm bound to fuck it up."

"I think you're a natural." She compliments, looking up at me. "I'm new to this dating thing too." She admits.

"At least you've done it before." I point out.

"Not for long." She adds. "I was nearly out of college when I started my first relationship, and it didn't last very long."

"So..." I trail off, not wanting to talk or think about her previous relationship with Garrett. "Do you want a regular vanilla relationship with no kinky fuckery at all?"

"Kinky fuckery?" She giggles at the phrase I used for kinky sex.

"Kinky fuckery." I repeat, smirking.

"I like kinky fuckery, sir." She purrs, biting her lip to fight her smile.

I chuckle. "That's right." _My baby's a freak_.

"I like vanilla too." She adds.

"I do as well." _As long as it's with you_.

"What does that mean for our contract?" She jokes, I think.

"Fuck the contract. It's a little redundant, don't you think? We've never really followed it, consider it null and void."

 _Of course we'll still have our Playroom fun_.

"Why are you willing to do this for me?"

"What do you mean?"

"You could have a nice Submissive. One who'd say 'how high?' every time you said jump, provided of course she had permission to speak. I mean, even I was willing to give you that just to keep you. So why me, Christian? I just don't get it. I'm not very Submissive."

"I think that's a majority of the reason why." I tell her. "You're right, I am used to women doing exactly what I say, when I say, doing exactly what I want. It gets old quickly. With you... It's different. It's refreshing. I've been enjoying our more vanilla relationship, and we still have a Dom/Sub agreement in the Playroom so it's not all vanilla."

"So it's because I challenge you?"

"It's not just that." I quickly set her straight. "There's something about you, Anastasia, which calls to me on some deep level. I don't understand it myself. I can't resist you. It's like you're a siren that calls to me. You are like a mythical creature, and I have to have you." _I'm still convinced she's into witchcraft._ "You make me look at the world differently, Anastasia. You give me... hope."

"Hope for what?" She asks.

"More." I answer quietly.

"More." She repeats, smiling, like she knows it means more than the four letter word defines. So much more.

I kiss her head, and pull her towards me.

It's Sunday so she's sure to go home tonight. I don't want her to go. Surely since she's my girlfriend now, that means I'll see her more than every other fucking weekend, right? I don't fucking know, but I sure hope it means more time with her.

"Will you stay with me tonight?" I ask.

"I work tomorrow." She mentions, reminding me, like that is supposed to be the reason she can't.

"You've stayed with me before on a weekday. Now that you're my girlfriend, you can stay with me more often, and I can give you a ride to work."

She opens her mouth to speak, but I continue before she can say anything.

"I'm not keeping you a secret, Anastasia. I don't want to hear any of that bullshit about coworkers or employees assuming you're sleeping your way to the top. I am as on top as you can get, and you've already been on top of me. More than once if I remember correctly." I grin, wiggling my eyebrows, playfully.

"Christian," She grins, pulling away from me, as she tries to chastise me for my 'naughty' behavior only to end up giggling.

"Baby," I pull her back down to lay with me. "We're together now, and I want the world to know you're mine."

"Well, I do want the world to know you're mine too, but I'd at least like you to meet my parents first. I can only imagine them reading it in some gossip magazine when they haven't met you or even know about you from me personally."

"Okay. We'll go public as soon as I met your parents then."

"Agreed."

As soon as I met her parents I'm going to shout it from the roof tops so all of Seattle will know she's mine.

"We both signed NDAs." She reminds me.

"You can forget about the NDA. Shred it." I honestly forgot about it and I trust her.

"Well mine can stay intact." She teases, at least I hope she's teasing. When she giggles, I know she's just messing with me.

 _~Feels so good being bad_  
 _There's no way I'm turning back_  
 _Now the pain is for pleasure_  
 _'Cause nothing can measure~_

"What the fuck is that?" I ask confused when a song starts to play out of no-fucking-where. _And those lyrics._

"Ugh. It's my phone." She tells me aggravated, reaching for the device. "I'm going to kill Kate!"

"I quite like it."

I admire her smooth silky exposed skin, fondling her bare ass, and enjoying her giggling as she reaches for her phone but the song has stopped with the missed called. _Perfect._

"You would." She giggles finally getting her phone to see who's called her. "It's a song about sex, chains, and whips. I'm just glad she didn't add the _'Sex in the air, I don't care, I love the smell of it'_ part of that song. Could you imagine; me getting a phone call in public with _that_ as my ring tone?!"

 _Sex in the air? Even better._

I smirk at the thought and move to capture her lips with mine, but the song stops me.

 _~Feels so good being bad  
_ _There's no way I'm turning back_  
 _Now the pain is for pleasure_  
 _'Cause nothing can measure~_

"Ugh, speaking of my parents." She groans, looking at her phone's incoming caller. "It's my mother."

"Don't answer it." I kiss her shoulder as I hold her waist, wanting her.

"I have to. If I don't, she'll just keep calling."

Perhaps I can hurry this phone call along.

When she answers, I begin to kiss her neck softly and palm her breast, gently tweaking her nipple.

"H-hi, mmmom." I smirk when she stutters, and involuntarily lifts her hips in response to my touch.

"Mom, slow down. I can't understand you. What's wrong?" She fails to push me away, trying to stop me, when I slowly trail my hand down her front.

"Oh, no!" She shouts before I can reach her sex.

Suddenly she sits up so I do as well.

I stop messing with her as badly as I want to right now, especially since she's disregarded the sheet as it pools around her hips and lap, no longer caring about her modesty. Her beautiful perky breasts are on full display, but I make no move to play with her as I can see the seriousness on her face. Something must have happened.

"Of course. Of course, I'll be there. ... I will, mom. As soon as I can, I promise. ... You too."

When she hangs up she seems sadden.

"What's wrong?"

"My... My mom's husband... He... He died." She doesn't seem as sad as she is just in shock.

"I'm sorry, baby." I give her my condolences.

"I have to leave. She lives in Georgia and I need to help her with everything."

I just now remember her mother has been married a multitude of times, according to Anastasia's background check I read over a month ago, although I didn't bother looking at any of her mother's husband's names as I was looking at the information pertaining to Anastasia specifically, and her mother's many relationships had nothing to do with Anastasia.

"I feel bad that I didn't know him well." She tells me as she now covers herself from my viewing pleasure but it's understandable that she wouldn't be in the mood for sex, and I shouldn't either, but tell that to my dick. I'm pitching a tent under the sheets here.

"When do you need to leave?" I need to distract myself from thinking about fucking her. "I can arrange for you to use my private jet to fly to Georgia."

"Thank you, Christian, but I couldn't possibly. I can just fly coach. My mother will pay for my ticket."

"Coach?!" I choke. That is the most absurd thing I have ever heard. No girlfriend of mine will be flying coach. "Anastasia, don't be ridiculous. If you don't want to take my private jet, you'll be riding first-class all the way, there and back." _Obviously I'll pay for her trip._ "I wont have my girlfriend riding coach." I say with finality in my tone, not to be argued with.

"Okay." She grins. I think the word girlfriend is what won her over, and I admit, it felt good saying it. "I do appreciate it, so thank you."

I smile against her lips when she gives me a simple chaste kiss.

"I know this isn't the best time, but... Would you mind if I join you?"

"Join me?"

"On your trip to Georgia." I explain. "I know it's not an ideal time, but I could meet your mother."

"You don't have work that needs your attention? Crap! I have to see about work first. I have to give them some kind of notice, and I don't even know how long I'll be gone. What if I can't get time off? What if-"

"Anastasia." I stop her from rambling and wait until she looks at me. Slowly I smirk. "Do you not see the state of undress you are in with the CEO of the company you work for?"

"Christian." I can hear the frustration in her tone as she says my name exasperated.

"It's a perk. You'll have to get used to it, baby, being with the CEO."

"Can you just not interfere with my job unless it's business related and not personal. I'll talk to whoever I need to and let them know I need to take a leave of absence. I'd appreciate it if you didn't."

"You're going to have to get used to being with the CEO, baby. There are many things you'll be able to get away with that no other employee would."

 _Kissing me in elevators for one_.

"I understand that, Christian, I do. However, I don't want you to interfere with my career if it's a personal matter. Maybe I should look for another job."

"What?" That's ridiculous. "Why?"

"Surely it's highly unprofessional and against some golden rule to be in a relationship with the boss."

"There are plenty of married couples that work together." _Shit! Did I just say-_

"Married?!"

"That's not what I meant." I quickly reassure her before she gets any ideas. "I meant couples. Couples work together."

"I- I guess you're right. Okay, I wont search for another job, but not because I probably wont find one, but because you'd probably purchase that company as well and move it to _Grey House_ until every company I could possibly work for is located in your company's main building  & then you'll have to move _Grey House_ to a new location to accommodate all the companies you takeover. I wouldn't want to be responsible for all that."

I laugh at her assumption, partly because it's true, as outrageous as she's making it sound. I would buy the next company that she was hired at.

"So... You never answered me." I tell her. "May I join you on your trip to Georgia so that I may meet your mother?"

"Hmmmm."

I tickle her ribs when she takes far longer to answer than it's necessary.

Tickling wasn't my greatest idea. Now her breasts are exposed and bouncing as she laughs and moves to escape my clutches.

"Okay, okay." She pants out through her laughter so I surrender. "Okay, you can join me."

"I'll arrange of everything." I say getting on top of her, kissing her neck. And when I say I, I mean my assistant will arrange everything.

"What do you mean?" She asks as she closes her eyes, tilting her head to give me better access to her neck.

"I don't fly commercial so we'll take my jet, and I'll arrange for our stay in a hotel."

I'm not sure if we'd stay with her mother, however, I plan to fuck my girlfriend while we're there, and I'd much rather do that in the privacy of our hotel room.

"You talk to whoever about your leave." I say to pacify her need to control her career, but I'll be the one who approves of her leave.

"I have to pack, and I need to let Kate know too." She starts to list things she needs to do before we leave.

She's breathing heavier now as I torture her with my mouth all over her body and my hand finally meets her sex. _She's so fucking wet._

"Enough talking."

I capture her lips with mine and help to spread her legs with mine. It's time for fucking.

Slowly sinking my dick inside her warm wet core, and moan against her lips.

Screw the fucking, let's make love.

* * *

 **APOV**

I've called GP and spoke to Martha, my editor. I was able to get the whole week off from work. I'm not naïve enough to not know Christian had something to do with my leave, especially since it's last minute, but I appreciate it since my mother needs me.

I used the rest of Sunday to pack for Georgia, and shop for a dress to wear to the funeral. Instead of buying new heels or wearing a pair I have, or borrowing from Kate, I just took some heels from the closet at Escala. They were too beautiful to pass up, and surprisingly comfortable.

I've told Kate what happened and she's taking time off from work to attend the funeral, so she'll see me in Savannah the day before Bob's funeral and will fly back to Seattle after Bob's service.

After I packed, I stayed with Christian and the next morning we were on a beautiful private jet headed to Savannah, Georgia. And yes, we joined the mile high club, the real mile high club, not the restaurant, and more than once.

We're in our hotel room now getting ready to go to my mother's so Christian can meet her and I can help her plan everything for Bob's funeral.

I have never seen Christian nervous so when his leg constantly bounces from where he's sitting on the sofa, waiting for me to get ready, and his hand flies into his hair for the millionth time, I stop what I'm doing and straddle his lap.

"Are you nervous to meet my mother, Mr. Grey?" I ask him playfully as I run my fingers through his hair at the nape of his neck.

"Of course not." He holds my hips as he gives me a sweet kiss. "I've just never done this before."

"I get that you've never done the 'meet the parents' before, but you have nothing to worry about with my mom. It's my father you have to worry about."

I giggle when I see his eyes widen a fraction, at the thought of meeting my father.

"I'm only kidding. My dad isn't the crazy stereotypical over protective father. And don't worry about my mom, she's going to be thrilled to meet you because I've 'finally met someone'." I feel his hands grip me tighter when I roll my eyes intended for my mother.

"You know, I've yet to spank you for rolling those beautiful blue eyes of yours. I'd like to do just that right now, however, we need to go."

"If you're lucky, I just may let you do that later, _Master_." I purr in his ear and giggle as I hear a deep primal growl come from his chest and feel his dick harden underneath my panties, thanks to this dress I'm wearing.

I give him a sweet kiss, and get off his lap, before we end up being late to my mother's with no plausible excuse that I could possible explain as to why.

 _ **~..~..~**_

Christian pulls up to my mother's home and opens the car door for me.

We hold hands as we walk up the path to the front door and just before I can knock Christian stops me.

"Anastasia, what do you mean your mother will be thrilled you've finally met someone?"

"Well, I've told you I didn't date until I was nearly finished with college. She doesn't know about Chad. I've not told her about him. My father has met him because he came to my graduatioin, but my mother didn't." Just as I finish explaining, the door opens and my mother wraps me in both an expected and unexpected hug.

"Oh, Ana." My mother cries.

"I'm here, mom." I hug her right back.

When we pull away, mom looks a hot mess as she wipes her eyes with a tissue and catches a glimpse of the man standing next to me.

"Ana?" My mom whispers, nudging me.

I roll my eyes and giggle at her reaction. I'm sure she's going to give me a mouth full when Christian's not around about how handsome he is.

She looks back at me with so many questions in her eyes so I decided now is a good time to introduce my mother to my boyfriend.

"Mom, this is my boyfriend, Christian Grey." Both Christian and I exchange shy smiles at one another at the word boyfriend. This is the first time we're telling someone of our status and it's actually true. "Christian, this is my mother, Carla Lincoln."

"It's a pleasure to meet you, Mrs. Lincoln."

 _Ugh! Why does my mother have to share the same last name as Mrs. Bitch-troll Robinson?_

"Carla." "Please, call her Carla." Both my mother and I say that the same time, though mine is more stressed than hers. My mother is being polite, but I'm being selfish, not wanting to hear _that_ name, and definitely not when it comes to my mother.

He's met my mother, I've met his parents. Now he just has to meet my father, and we can go public.

My mother looks happy now as she bypasses Christian's extended hand. I know what she's going to do and Christian must sense it as well because he takes a subtle step back to distance myself from my mother. I step between them, hugging my mother again, effectively stopping her from touching Christian. He's just starting to be okay with my touch, I don't know how he would react to hers.

"How are you holding up, mom?" I ask as I hug her again.

"I've most certainly been better, Ana. I'm glad you're here, though. And the lawyers just phoned to say we're needed at the law office to read through Bob's will."

"We?"

"Yes, he's left a few things to you."

"I can drive you both." Christian offers. "After, we can have dinner together and get better acquainted."

"That's very kind of you, Christian." My mother smiles at him. "I just have to lock up, but I'm ready now, if you two are?"

"Sure."

 _ **~..~..~**_

My mother, Christian, and I are waiting in the lawyers waiting area for my mother's appointment with Bob's attorney. My mother seems to be doing well and is telling Christian all kinds of stories of my childhood. _Ugh!_ I think it's helping her cope, but remind me to visit Grace when we return to Seattle to see if she has any embarrassing stories or photos of Christian.

Heels clicking on the tile floor grabs our attention and if Christian wasn't holding my waist on this tiny loveseat, I would have slide off, at who I see.

Elena _fucking_ Lincoln.

"What is _she_ doing here?" I find my venom coming out of my mouth instead of in my head. My brain to mouth filter malfunctioning again.

"That's Bob's ex-wife." My mother whispers to me.

"What?!" Both Christian and I shout in surprise in the library-like quiet room, causing Bitch-troll to look at us just as surprised.

"Christian, darling." She purrs as she walks our way. "What a surprise to see you here."

My mother looks a little confused as to why I'm giving Elena the death glare. It's unusual for me not to like someone. I'm confused as to why Christian hasn't said anything, but then I remember the scene in his office where we 'switched roles' for the Bitch-troll's benefit so that's what I assume he's doing now. Listening to his Dommé. Me.

"Mrs. Lincoln, Miss Steele, & Ms. Lincoln?" A paralegal calls for us.

Elena smiles politely at the paralegal, almost transforming into a different person completely. I see now how she's able to manipulate those around her. For a second, I almost thought she was a nice person with that fake smile plastered on her face.

"Mom, is it alright if Christian joins us?" I ask her as we stand.

"Sure, sweetie."

Christian holds my hand as we all walk to the conference room they are using to read Bob's will.

When we enter, we are all greeted by Bob's attorney, Jeffery Moore.

He sits at the end with all the paperwork, Elena sits next to his paralegal, Christian and I sit next to my mother who is sitting closest to Mr. Moore. My mother explains who Christian is, since the paralegal only called women, and soon we begin.

"Good afternoon, ladies and Mr. Grey. As I've said, I'm Mr. Lincoln's attorney, Jeff Moore. I send you my deepest sympathy and condolences for your loss. You're here today so that I may read Mr. Lincoln's will. He's recently changed a few things just days before his passing. Without further ado, I'll begin."

He takes out a pair of readers and starts shifting his paperwork around.

As to be expected, he begins listing item after item for my mother, then he moves on to me.

"To my beautiful step-daughter, Anastasia Steele. I leave my house in Bellevue, Washington. My-"

 _His house?! It's a mansion in Bellevue! What am_ I _going to do with a mansion?!_

"Pardon me," A sweet voice stops him from continuing. I'm extremely surprised to here that voice belongs to Elena. "I don't mean to interrupt, however, I have an appointment after this. If you don't mind, would you read what my ex-husband left in his will for me. I received a call saying I needed to be here during the reading, and I really must be going soon."

"Of course, ma'am." He looks and looks through all the paperwork, trying to find something Bob left for Elena.

"It's Elena Lincoln." The Bitch-troll helps him out, still sickly sweet.

"Yes, I have something here." He says then begins to read. "To my bitch Elena-"

I can't control my outburst as I laugh loudly then cover my mouth with my hand. Christian lets out a much more subtle and quiet chuckle.

"Excuse me?!" Elena lets her mock sweetness slip.

"That's our dog." My mom leans in to tell the attorney. "Unfortunately, she passed in the accident as well."

I never knew their dog's name was Elena. We've always called her Lenah. Or maybe they have and I just didn't catch the beginning sound.

I giggle inappropriately as I wonder what he left the dog, but stop when I've caught everyone's attention and press my lips together to keep quiet.

"My apologies, Ms. Lincoln." The attorney is slightly flustered as he tries to find what Bob left Elena, the bitch, not Elena, the female dog, then he begins to read Bob's will again. "I leave controlling shares to Esclava Salons in Seattle, Washington owned by Elena Lincoln to... Oh, I'm sorry, that wasn't left to you. Please, give me a moment as I'm going out of order here."

"No." Elena insists. "What did you just say?"

"You've asked me to read what Robert left to you, ma'am. I apologize, I saw your name listed on the Esclava Salons and just assumed, however, that was not-"

"That's not possible. He doesn't have controlling shares." She glares at Mr. Moore, then at Christian, then turning her cold blue eyes on me like it's my fault. I guess I did say that I control Christian and I would do whatever I wished with her salons, but I honestly did not know about this.

 _Why would I gift the controlling shares to her salon businesses to my step-father?_ I didn't even know they were married.

I glance at Christian, who is trying and failing to hide his smirk.

"Well, it was added just days ago," Mr. Moore explains. "So that may be why-"

"What?!" She glares at Christian again before she turns back to the attorney.

"Who did he leave it to?" She demands. I can hear the Dominant in her tone now.

Mr. Moore looks at the paperwork through his readers. "Anastasia Steele."

"Me?" I squeak, surprised, then slowly grin a mischievous smirk as I now hold controlling shares of Elena's salons and I can do anything I wish with them. The possibilities are endless. _Muahahahahaha._

* * *

We've been in Georgia a couple days now and today is Bob's funeral.

Christian said it's weird, hearing me call Bob by his given name, because when he knew him, back when the Lincoln's were married and living in Seattle, he went by Linc. You can imagine my surprise when I learned that Elena was also married to Bob when she and Christian had their sexual relationship.

 _What a horrible woman_.

And I guess there was some mistake as Bob never left her anything at all. They confused her with my mother since Elena kept her last name Lincoln. Though, I'm not sure how they would confuse her with my mother since they don't have the same given name. An intern is responsible for the mix up.

I have done most of the planning for the funeral, with Christian's help, because my mother was so heartbroken.

Christian and I are on our way to pick up my mother so we can all ride to the funeral home together. Christian looks so handsome in his black suit and I feel sexy in my simple black dress. We look so sophisticated, like we actually belong together as a couple.

When Christian pulls up to my mother's home, he gets out to help her while I sit in the car like he asked me to.

"Hi, mom." I greet her from my front passenger seat when she gets into the back.

"Hello, Ana." She sounds so sad, and I feel so bad for her. She lost her husband, the man she loves. That has to hurt. I could only imagine her pain.

When Christian gets into the drivers seat, I can't help but feel the sympathy tenfold, thinking of losing him. It hurt when we stopped chatting online, it hurt when we split-up when I foolishly believed lies told by a jealous bitch. I can't imagine losing him forever.

I reach for his hand and give it a gentle squeeze that he returns while he drives.

He really knows how to melt my heart when he brings my hand to his lips, pressing them lightly to my knuckles.

We continue to hold hands during the whole drive to the funeral home.

We are here early before anyone.

Since I've done most of the planning the director needed to speak with my mother privately so Christian and I are near the entrance, greeting Bob's friends and family as they come for the services and to pay their respects.

We've already seen Kate when she arrived, and said hello, before she entered the hall.

"Christian?"

We both turn when we hear a familiar sweet feminine voice and see Grace with Carrick.

"Hello, mother."

"Hi, darling, what are you doing here? I didn't think you liked coming to these things?"

"Anastasia's step-father passed and he happened to be Linc." Christian explains.

"Oh," Grace turns to me, giving me a motherly gentle hug. "I'm so sorry for your loss, dear."

I don't know what to say when people say this. _'It's okay'_ , seems mean. _'Thank you'_ , just doesn't seem right either.

Before I can say anything the main doors open, bringing in a blast of the Savannah heat with it in the otherwise air conditioned lobby of the funeral parlor.

When I turn around to greet who entered, I don't think the heat outside is what caused the heat to enter the building. I think it was heat from hell that she brought with her. Elena Lincoln is wearing a tight black dress and a black hat that covers half of her platinum blonde bob with a veil coming down to her chin. I didn't think she would come to the funeral. I hate to say it, but she looks beautiful.

"Hello, Elena." Grace greets her so-called friend and I cringe when they hug.

"Hello, Grace." She responds in her fake sweetness.

 _How can they be friends?!_

I get that Grace doesn't know what kind of sick disgusting person Elena truly is, but they are so opposite, totally incompatible.

I swear I'm going to throw up. I can feel the familiar vile build up in my throat, that acidy feeling. It's gross, sickening.

"How are you, Anastasia?"

It takes me a moment longer than it should when Elena asks me this, because she's still being overly sweet. I'm unsure why she would be sweet to me, but then I realize, she must be putting on a show for Grace and Carrick. I'll have to put on one right back if I don't want Christian's parents to hate me for not liking their friend.

"Fine." I just can't be nice to her.

Hopefully my standoffish approach will be seen as mourning the loss of my step-father.

"You look breathtaking in that dress, darling." She continues.

I look at her suspiciously. Surely she doesn't need to keep up with the friendly exchanges.

"Thanks."

Grace and Elena being a conversation about their flights here and back to Seattle. They learn they are on the same flight home and are thrilled.

"Grace and Carrick, if you don't mind staying an extra day, I would love for you to meet my mother." I find myself saying to keep Elena away from them. "You can fly back with Christian and I on the GEH jet. Right, Christian?"

When I look at Christian, he doesn't look pleased. His face is the usual impassive, however, his eyes give him away.

 _Oops, maybe I shouldn't of volunteered that._ But they are his parents, and I can't stand that they are friends with that vile woman who did unspeakable things to their son. I feel they should know what she's done, but I don't want to hurt Christian in the process.

"We'd be pleased if you joined us for dinner with Anastasia's mother as well as joining us on our flight back." He says politely, holding my waist, then he leans down to whisper in my ear. "I wanted to fuck you on the plane, baby. How am I to do that with my parents joining us?"

"Oh." That's why he's not pleased "But. We did... _that_ on the way here." I whisper back as I blush, glancing at his parents, hoping they don't know what we're discussing, but they are talking with Elena now, who is still smiling overly politely at me when she looks our way.

"I'll never get enough of your sweet pussy, Anastasia." I hear Christian whisper seductively in my ear.

"Christian!" I scold him a little too loudly, causing others to look at us and Christian to give a low chuckle.

My mother finally returns so we introduce her to Grace and Carrick, then we enter the hall to start Bob's extremely sad service.

I hold Christian's arm a little tighter throughout, and it's then when it hits me. I'm not falling for Christian.

I look up at him, and he looks down at me.

He gives me a small smile before kissing my head and turns his attention back to the service of Robert 'Bob' Andrew 'Linc' Lincoln.

I realize at this moment... I am completely and irrevocably in love with this man.

* * *

 **A/N:** ** _If you're wondering why Christian did not know Linc was Anastasia's step-father when he has her background check...  
He wasn't paying attention to all her mother's marriages but to the information pertaining to Anastasia specifically.  
(Did you pay attention to her mother's husbands on the background check in chapter 4?)  
I didn't receive any reviews regarding the breadcrumbs I left regarding this twist, did anyone notice?  
(Chapters 4, 10, & 18 all have little clues.)_**

 ** _And if you haven't noticed... I changed Linc's given name to Robert.  
_**

 ** _OH! & if you didn't catch it, Christian gifted his share of the salons to Linc. Which Linc then left them to Anastasia if he were to... well, you know.  
_**

 ** _Thanks for reading & reviewing._**

 ** _Until laters._**


	24. (24) Intrusions

**APOV**

We've returned to Seattle with Christian's parents and just finished having dinner with them at the Mile High club.

Christian and I are in the back of his Audi SUV with Taylor driving us.

We were in Savannah for a whole week to help my mother with the aftermath of Bob's sudden passing. And despite the fact that the circumstances of that visit were extremely sad and depressing, it was amazing because Christian and I have been together the whole week. We didn't have to hide, he took me to dinner often, we even went gliding as one of Christian's favorite pastimes is soaring. It was a much needed week of getting to know one another better.

I can't wait until he meets my dad so we can come out publicly here in Seattle. Not so the media or others will know, but so we can do the things we did in Savannah here in Seattle without being bothered. I'm sure there will be some kind of craze or frenzy when the media first discovers we're together, that Christian Grey has an official girlfriend, but hopefully it wont last long.

Even though I didn't work all week, I'm ready to curl in my bed and sleep for days, however, today is Sunday and I have work tomorrow, so I settle for leaning against Christian as Taylor drives me home. I almost don't want to leave him, okay I don't, but I have to work in the morning and I don't want to come off as clingy. I've been spoiled with having Christian sleep with me for a week straight.

Maybe-

"Will you stay with me tonight?" Christian interrupts my train of thought.

I look up at him, smiling. I think he can read my mind.

"I have to go to my apartment first, to get work clothes."

"You have clothes and everything you need at my apartment, Anastasia."

"Oh yeah. Okay, but I need to drop off my suitcase first. I don't want to bring my funeral clothes to your apartment."

It may be summer, but Savannah is hotter than Seattle, and I don't need these clothes with me.

"Alright." He kisses my head then tells Taylor to stop by my place.

I stay snuggled against Christian's arm as Taylor drives.

"Do you want me to come up with you?" Christian asks when Taylor pulls up to my apartment building.

"No, I'll only be a minute." I tell him.

He looks annoyed, and at first I think it's at me, but then he pulls out his phone, scowling at it.

"Grey." He answers, using his name, in his CEO don't fuck with me tone. It's so sexy. I'm going to call him on the phone more often, instead of texting, just to hear it. I can't wait to go back into his Playroom again so I can hear his Dom voice, and play of course.

He looks at me a little confused, with the phone still to his ear listening to whomever called him, probably wondering why I'm smiling.

"I'll be right back." I mouth.

He nods then he continues his call.

Taylor opens my door before I can.

"Thank you, Taylor."

"I've got it, Ms. Steele." He tells me when I reach for my luggage.

"I can take it, Taylor." I didn't pack much, I'm not a material kind of girl, and it has wheels so it's not that heavy.

"If you insist, ma'am."

"I do." I smile at him politely when he gives me my bag.

I walk up to my apartment building and reach for- _Crap!_ I forgot my purse in the SUV with Christian. Oh well, Kate should be home.

I click the buzzer for our apartment and hear it click, connecting, but she doesn't say anything.

"Hey, Kate. It's me." I say through the intercom. She still doesn't respond so I continue. "I don't have my key. Let me in."

The door buzzes, and I head upstairs to the apartment.

Kate was kind enough to leave the door open for me.

When I step inside the apartment, I see why Kate didn't answer the entry system.

She's sitting comfortably on the sofa, wearing her pajamas, with her legs crossed under herself. She's watching a movie, and eating a huge bowl of cereal.

"Hey, I'm going to stay at Christian's tonight." I let her know, closing the main door behind me.

"Okay." She says with her mouth full, swallowing before she continues. "How's your mom doing?"

"She's as to be expected after just losing her husband, but she's holding up." I give her a sad smile at the situation. "Thanks again for being there for his services."

"You know I'm there for you."

"I know. Me too."

"Sisters from another mister." She quotes the infamous saying.

"And another misses." I giggle. "I'm just going to leave my suitcase here and grab some work clothes for tomorrow."

"K." She goes back to her snack of cold cereal.

As I walk passed her, I think of all that Bob has left to me. The salons, enough money to pay off my student loans and then some. Christian is going to help me invest it so my money can 'work for me'. And then there's the house. Thank goodness it's not the house he shared with Mrs. Robinson when they were married. I'd probably bulldoze it if it was. He purchased it after their divorce. But still... it's a freaking mansion, what am _I_ going to do with it?

"Bob left me his house in Bellevue." I tell Kate, standing in the doorway for my room before I go inside.

Maybe she will know what I should do with it.

"Are you moving out?" She asks sad, putting her cereal down now.

"No. Bellevue is too far from my job. I wouldn't want to do all that unnecessary traveling. I don't know what I'm going to do with it yet." Then I smile mischievously thinking, "He left me controlling shares to a beauty salon here in Seattle too."

"What are _you_ going to do with a salon?"

"I'm not sure yet. Something mischievous for sure." I grin as such. "Perhaps, burn it to the ground."

"You hate beauty that much?!"

"No. Just the bitch running it." Insert evil laugh here, I think to myself, but don't do said laugh. Kate may have me committed.

"Why don't you torture her, not the salons."

"I like your way of thinking. I'm not sure yet... I'll think of something, though."

"I'll think too."

"Okay." I giggle as I walk to my room now.

Instead of putting my belongs away when I enter my room, I just leave them in the case for now.

I have everything I need at Escala, but I need a few essentials since I'm staying overnight and I have work tomorrow.

I take out the manuscripts I brought with me to Georgia since I will need them for work tomorrow, and my small travel beauty bag since it has most of my beauty supplies inside. I have everything I need except some elastics to tie my hair back with, since I seem to lose those darn things every time I turn around. I swear it's worse than the sock monster. I grab a couple from the top of my dresser, but stop from doing anything more when I feel like something is missing or has been moved.

My picture.

The picture of Kate, José, and I after Kate and I finished our finals.

We all went out to celebrate and Chad came with too. He took the photo of me with my friends.

It's missing.

I look on the floor, thinking it fell, but it's not anywhere I look.

"Kate?" I call to her from my room but I don't get a reply.

"Kate." I call again as I walk out of my room and go into the main room.

She's no longer in the main room. Her cereal bowl now empty and disregarded on the table, and it's eerily quiet.

"Kate?"

I turn around, hearing noises coming from her room. The only way I can describe the noise, is sounding like shoes in a dryer banging around.

I call for her again but I must be too quiet for her to hear me because she doesn't answer.

I slowly make my way to her room and push the door open.

I'm surprised at what I see, though I shouldn't be.

"Hey." I call her attention away from her shoes.

"I can't find my gold pumps." She complains as she continues to look through her shoes that are in a mountain around her, tossing different shades of gold heels aside, looking for a specific pair. "I wanted to wear them tomorrow. Have you seen them?"

"The ones Stephanie borrowed when we all went out?" I ask, remembering she borrowed a pair to Steph, but I'm not sure if they are the gold pumps she's looking for.

"Yes." She looks relieved that she didn't lose them.

"I'll send her a text. But, hey... Where you in my room while I was gone?"

"Only to look for my heels. Why?"

"Did you move my photo? The one of us after finals. I keep it on my dresser and it's not there."

"No. In fact, I knocked it over accidently and put it back on your dresser before I left for Georgia. That was the last time I was in your room."

"Hmm."

 _Then where is my photo?_

Kate gets up and walks to my room, so I follow her.

She looks on the dresser where it would be and where she returned it, and together we look around the dresser but it's nowhere to be found.

As we're looking, we're both startled by a loud banging noise in the main room of the apartment.

"Aaaaaaaaaaaaahhhh!" We both jump, scream a high pitch girly shriek, and hold each other.

In seconds, my bedroom door flies open, revealing a worried Christian.

Both Kate and I release each other and the breath we were holding, relieved that he's not a hash slinging slasher.

My poor heart is going to fail me before I'm 22.

"Christian." I say relieved. "You frightened us."

"You've been up here for quite awhile, Anastasia." I can tell his trying not to let his Dom tone slip through. "I was beginning to worry."

"I'm sorry, I didn't notice." I didn't realize I was gone long, and I did tell him I would only be a minute as I was only dropping off my luggage.

"Hey, how'd you get in, Grey?" Kate asks, and I just realize the same thing.

 _How_ did _he get in?_ Maybe he used my keys since I left them in the SUV _._

"What are you talking about? One of you buzzed me up."

"No we didn't." I say.

"We were in our rooms the whole time." Kate says.

"Someone buzzed me up." He tells us. "I pressed the intercom for your apartment. No one said anything, but they buzzed me up."

That's what happened with me, but I _know_ Kate let me up.

Both Kate and I look at one another with wide eyes as neither of us buzzed him up to our apartment. Which can only mean...

I look back to my dresser again at where my missing photo would be. _Did someone take it? Was someone in our apartment?! NOW?!_

"What is it?" Christian asks, seeing the look both Kate and I have now.

"I... I think..." I trail of not wanting to say it. If I don't say it, it can't be true.

"Someone's been in our apartment!" Kate says for me.

"What?!" Christian shouts.

"Oh my god!" The realization hits me. If they let Christian in... _Someone was in our apartment while we were in our apartment!_

"Pack your belongings." Christian snaps, pulling out his phone. "You're staying with me."

"What about Kate?" I ask him looking at my worried friend then back to him.

"Katherine too." He confirms.

"I can stay with my parents." Kate says to me. "My dad will want to know."

"It's late, Kate. You can stay with us tonight and just call your dad in the morning." I didn't realize how that sounded until it's too late. When I look at Christian he has a mixture of emotions in his eyes so I'm unsure of how he's feeling about that at the moment.

"Katherine, pack your belongings. You'll stay with us tonight."

Kate rushes to her room and I dump my suitcase out onto my bed, filling it with everything I will need. I'm not sure how long I will stay with Christian, and I do have things at his apartment, but I fill my suitcase with whatever I can fit inside of the bag. I make sure to grab the manuscripts I need for tomorrow too.

I can hear Christian speaking rapidly on his cell just outside my door while I hurriedly pack as much as I can.

"I want it done tonight." I hear Christian growl as I walk out of my room, packed and ready to go.

"I'm ready." I tell him.

He ends his call without saying anything more just as Kate walks out of her room with a suitcase and her travel case she uses for her beauty products.

"I have someone coming to change the locks to your apartment tonight." He tells us. "Does anyone have a spare key?"

"Just my parents and my brother." Kate says.

"Your locks will be changed on the door and windows, and you can return tomorrow." He says, but only looking at Kate.

"Shouldn't we call the police?" I ask.

"There's no proof." Christian says.

"I should still call my dad." Kate insists.

"Call him from the SUV or when we arrive at Escala. Let's go."

I jump when Taylor comes into view, grabbing our luggage with Christian.

"I've granted him access to the apartment." Christian explains gently.

We all walk out together.

Kate and I get inside the back of the SUV while Christian and Taylor puts our luggage in the trunk.

"Who do you think would break in?" Kate asks me as she looks around our neighborhood.

"I don't know." I answer truthfully following her stares. "But I think whoever it was took my photo. We couldn't find it. Why would they want it? It's just of us three. There's nothing special about it."

Try as I might, I cannot think of anyone who would want that photo. It's just of me and my friends after Kate and I finished our finals. We didn't check if anything else was missing, but it came from my room. The only 'enemy' I can think of is Mrs. Robinson, but it wouldn't make sense for her to take the photo. _What could she possibly want with it? What could she even do with it?_ It's strange that whoever broke in only took a photo. We didn't stay around to notice if anything else was taken, and it is just a photo, but with Christian being granted access to the apartment, that's just creepy. I don't know who broke in, but I'm scared.

"I'm scared, Ana." Kate brings me out of my thoughts, reflecting them. "I don't know if I want to come back tomorrow even with the changed locks."

"We can stay at the house in Bellevue that Bob left me. It's a longer drive to and from work, but nobody knows of it."

"Yeah, let's do that." She agrees. "I'm going to call my dad when we get to Christian's place."

Christian gets in next to me, wrapping his arm around me, and Taylor gets into the driver's seat to drive us to Escala.

While we take the short five minute ride to Escala, I try to think of who could have broken into our apartment.

It's scary to think someone was in the apartment with Kate and I. But who else could have let Christian in, furthermore, why would they let him in? Surely you would think they would know better than to do that as it's an easy way to get caught and he's a man. It doesn't make any sense.

All through the drive Christian is going crazy with his emails and such. I feel badly that I kept him from work all week while we were in Georgia, however, he did do business while there, via phone calls, emails, and Skype.

It doesn't take long for Taylor to park in the designated penthouse stall.

We all get out, Christian and Taylor gets Kate and my luggage, and we walk to the elevator together.

Christian keeps his hand around my waist as we ride the elevator up in silence.

Once we're in his apartment, Christian tells me to head to his room for the night and shows Kate to a room upstairs.

I wonder if he's showing her the Submissive bedroom. I hope not.

It feels both comforting and alien to be in Christian's bedroom.

I want to shower and wash away the day so I head to his walk-in closet to get a T-shirt of Christian's out of his drawer, but stop in my tracks when I see woman's clothing. Upon closer inspection, I notice it's the clothing from the Submissive room, my room. He must of had Gail move them because he was with me in Georgia and we just returned today.

 _Why did he move the clothes? Because I'm his girlfriend now? Does that mean I no longer have to use the Submissive room?_

There are silk nightgowns and pajamas I could wear to bed, but I choose one of Christian's T-shirts as planned then and go into the bathroom.

I love his bathroom, it's like a dream.

I turn on the shower, getting it ready, then I strip from my clothing and put my hair in a messy bun so I don't get it wet. I don't want to dry my hair before I go to sleep and sleeping with wet hair never looks good the next morning.

I step under the warm water and smile when I see a high-end feminine body wash next to his, but again opt for his.

I begin to cover my body with the suds from Christian's body wash and rise my body.

I finish up quickly, but I decide to wait in the shower, knowing Christian will join me.

As expected, I hear the bathroom door open, and it doesn't take long for Christian to wrap his arms around my shoulders.

He holds me close from behind, his nose in my hair inhaling deeply, as I hold his forearms. He kisses my head then he reaches for the purple feminine bottle of body wash, lathers some in his hands and fondles my breasts as he washes my body. I don't mention that I've already washed my body, and with his wash, because this feels so good.

"Mmmm." I moan, leaning my head against his chest.

"How are you, baby?" He kisses my head for a second time.

"About my apartment allegedly being broken into?" I assume the reason he's asking. "I'm terrified. Kate and I will probably stay at the house Bob left me in Bellevue. It's quite the drive to and from work, though. We'll be adding at least 20 to 30 minutes to our commute."

I feel his body stiffen behind me so I turn around.

"You can stay with me." He offers. "I live closer to _Grey House_ than Bellevue. I don't want you that far away from me. Someone granted me access to your apartment, and if it wasn't you and it wasn't Katherine... I shutter to think of someone in your apartment with you, of what could have happened to you, while I was waiting oblivious in my SUV. If anything ever happened to you, Anastasia..." He trails off looking lost.

"Christian,-"

Before I can say more, he leans down capturing my lips with his, wrapping his arms around me.

I have my hands on his biceps, and he moves one of his hands to grab a handful of my ass, bringing me closer to him. I moan against his mouth when I feel his hard dick between us. Our kiss turns heated as I wrap my arms around his neck, trying to get closer to him.

He knows what I want, and it doesn't take him long before he lifts me, pushing my back against the shower wall. I wrap my legs around him and continue to kiss him.

"Christian." I moan against his lips when I feel his fingers run along my sex, brushing my clit.

"I've got you, baby."

He removes his fingers, replacing it with his dick.

I arch my back, effectively pushing my breasts towards him, and fist his hair. He leans down, latching onto my nipple sucking gently and nibbling it, pulling it with his teeth. My sex clenches deliciously in response, causing him to moan when my sex tightens around him.

He continues to thrust hard and deep into me while kissing up from my nipple to my neck.

"Christian, I'm going to cum." I warn him, I can't hold it any longer.

"Cum, baby." His deep sexy masculine voice moaning in my ear is all it takes, combined with his thrusts, for me to cum.

"Oh! Christian!"

"That's it, baby. Cum for me."

The feel of his dick pulsing inside of me, only makes me cum again.

He pumps a few more times, enough for me to ride out my second orgasm, then stills emptying his release inside of me.

His forehead is resting on my shoulder as he tries to catch his breathing. My head is tilted back, leaning against the shower wall.

The sound of our heavy breathing and the shower running is the only thing heard.

Christian pulls out of me, lowering me to the tiled floor. Good thing we're in the shower because I can feel him leaking out of me.

"Say you'll stay." He pants out, looking intently at me. "Say you'll stay with me."

"I'll stay." I breathe.

He gives me one last hard kiss.

We clean ourselves again and turn off the shower to go to bed.

He steps out wrapping a white fluffy towel around his waist, showing off his sexy prominent V, his happy trail leading to what I know to be the promise land of pleasure. As he wraps me in a larger towel, I can't help but imagine kissing and licking the beads of water from his hard sexy body.

 _How is it that I've just been satisfied and already I want more?_

After we dry off, Christian puts on a fresh pair of boxer briefs and I put on his T-shirt that I laid out for me to wear.

I hear an animalistic growl come from him when he sees I'm not going to wear panties to bed. _Why should I?_ _He'll just take them off in the morning._

I smirk over my shoulder at him, and walk out of the bathroom, putting way too much swing into my hips, swaying my ass more than necessary.

I squeal, running when I see him come after me.

He ends up tackling me to his bed, kissing me all over my face as his hands lift his shirt that I'm wearing.

We're laying horizontally instead of vertically on his bed, laughing and rolling around as we struggle against each other.

Soon Christian growls, but it's not his sexy I want you growl, it's his annoyed growl. He pulls away from me, still straddling me, and reaches towards his bedside table to grab his phone. _Oh that's why he's annoyed_. We were interrupted by his buzzing phone... _again._

We often were interrupted by business calls or Skype meetings in Georgia so this is nothing new.

"Grey." Christian answers his phone in his usual CEO tone.

I bite my lip so I don't giggle, because he's still on top of me and we're practically naked while he conducts a business call, but that just makes his eyes darken with desire and want.

I rub my thighs together feeling the wetness, and hoping he ends his call soon. Or just fucks me like he did in Georgia while on a business call. It was hot. He had his phone on speaker, and he had to cover my mouth with his hand while he fucked me from behind to keep my moans and screams at bay. I don't know how he was able to conduct that phone call, I barely heard anything myself.

After a few more exchanges, he ends the call and attacks me again, only this time he kisses my lips instead of my face, pulling my bottom lip with his teeth.

"I love biting this lip." He murmurs against my mouth.

"Christian." I moan, bucking my hips up.

"Mmm, do you want me, baby?"

"Always."

"Oh, baby," He moans. "Me too."

I maneuverer myself so my thighs are now resting on top of his, effectively spreading my legs and opening myself up to him. My breasts are covered by the T-shirt I'm wearing, but my sex is on full display.

He looks at my exposed sex and growls appreciatively. I flex my hips up when he runs his fingers along my slit, trying to get them inside of me.

"You're so fucking wet." He moans in awe, like he's never seen me wet before.

My breathing has picked up, I'm hot, flushed, and horny as hell. My sex is instinctively clenching. I want him. I always want him.

I pull at the waistband of his boxer briefs, and his erection springs free. Grabbing him, I stroke his dick, feeling him pulse and twitch under my touch.

He bends down to kiss me, and I bring his his dick to my sex, coating him in my wetness, as we kiss.

I move my hand off his member when he begins to push inside of me, but before anything can happen his phone vibrates next to me.

"Fuck!" He shouts, pulling away and grabbing his phone. "I'm sorry, baby, it could be important."

"It's fine." I try not to let my annoyance show through my tone. He's annoyed enough for the both of us. He does have a multibillion dollar company to run and he has been away all week.

"Grey!" He snaps this time. "No, give it to me tomorrow morning. ... Then email it to me and I'll look at it tonight!" He ends the call, tossing his phone onto the bed next to me.

"Where were we?" He asks.

"FUCK!" He shouts when his phone vibrates again with another incoming call before we can do anything.

I huff annoyed, but stay quiet as he answers, conversing with whomever.

I'm much too busy admiring his physic but I do hear bits and pieces of this conversation. Something about a missing security ID at _Grey House_ and needing to change all GEH security's access badges first thing tomorrow morning.

This call seems urgent, I can hear the importance of it in his tone, so I try to get up, but he's holds me down, not letting me move.

While he speaks, his hand roams my body; grabbing my breasts under my shirt, running his hand down my stomach to my sex. I bite my lip so I don't moan while he's on the phone when he cups my sex, but a tiny moan escapes when his fingers slip inside of me.

Deciding to accept his challenge, I let my hands play with his happy trail then I wrap my hand around his dick, tentatively stroking his impressive length, as he continues his phone conversation. He removes his fingers from my sex, so I look up to check his reaction. His eyes are dark, hooded, and full of desire. I'm sure mine show the same.

I continue to play with him, boldly now.

I sweep the pre-cum from his head with my thumb and suck it off my digit, while looking at him through my lashes. I can taste both him and I mixed together since his head was in me before we were disrupted with these intrusive business phone calls.

He growls, and ends the call before saying anything to the caller.

"If it goes off one more fucking time, I'm going to-" Before he can finish his sentence, it goes off in his hand.

I giggle but stop when he throws it onto his bedside table, ignoring the call, and slamming into me. I'm so wet and ready he easily slides inside of me.

"Oh!" I moan at the sudden intrusion, tilting my head up.

He's kneeling up, one hand on my hip, the other on the mattress. He pulls back out and this time when he slams back inside of me, he circles his hips, grinding into me. He pulls out again, and again he thrusts into me, circling his hips. I'm moaning with each thrust and watching as his wet dick slides out then disappears deep inside of me, again and again. He pulls out, slams inside of me, and circles his hips. Out. In. Grind. Out. In. Grind. He keeps up this fast paced pattern, until I begin to meet his thrusts, then he falters a bit with a groan of pleasure.

"Fuck. Baby." His voice is breathy, husky, and so full of need.

My sex clenches deliciously around him, I can already feel my juices soaking us both. I'm so wet, hot and sweaty, and I can see that Christian is too, with his damp hair clinging to his head. A new rhythm is set now, with us both meeting each others thrusts. My sex is getting wetter and wetter. The only sounds you hear is our labored breathing, the slaps of our bodies when they make contact, his grunts, and my moans.

Our bodies are moving together in a beautiful rhythm. This man knows what he's doing and he does it well.

Since he discovered my touch is tolerable, he allows me to touch him freely, but occasionally he still instinctively holds my hands so I wont touch him. This is one of the few times Christian doesn't hold my hands when he's on top of me during sex. As hot as it is when he holds me down, I have free rein of my hands and I love touching his body. I take this opportunity to slowly run my hands up his arms, feeling how muscular he is, and enjoying it. Fisting my hands into his hair, I pull him to me and kiss him hard as we continue to have sex on his bed.

Christian continues to pull out and slam back into me again and again. I whimper each time he pulls out, and moan when he slams back inside. I bring my legs up, raising my thighs higher, so he can go deeper. I place my feet on his thighs and lift my ass slightly higher. The motion and the new angle is amazing.

"Anastasia..." He moans against my mouth, continuing to pound into me.

I think he's going to say more, but he just leans down capturing my mouth with his again, kissing me urgently.

The rough sex quickly turns from something primal to something desperate.

I have to move away from his mouth when he goes deeper now, grinding harder and harder into me without pulling out this time. My mouth now forms a perfect O as he continues to pleasure me. He moves to kiss my neck, while I keep my hands entangled in his hair and continue to move my hips matching his rhythm.

The way he's looking into my eyes, our bodies connecting in such a pleasurable way, it's all too much. I love this man, I love the way he makes me feel, both emotionally and physically, and right now the things he's doing to both my body and my heart... I have to tell him.

"Christian. I lo-" He grinds deep inside of me, effectively hitting my g-spot. "Oh god, Christian."

"I know, baby."

 _No, I don't think you do._

"Cum." He demands desperately. "I need you to cum."

That's all it takes for me to explode around him in a mind-blowing, toe-curling, body convulsing orgasmic bliss, falling into oblivion and back.

He pushes into me, and I feel his dick pulsate deep inside of me. He crashes his lips to mine as he continues to pump out his release.

My sex is still contracting, milking his dick long after he's finished.

When he pulls out, I feel some of his warm sperm leak out of me, mixed with my own release. _So much for the shower_. I giggle at the thought.

"Now's not the time for giggling, Anastasia." He chastises me playfully, pulling his boxer briefs back up that weren't completely off of him while we had sex.

"I'm sorry," I try to stifle my giggle as I lower the T-shirt I'm wearing that surprisingly didn't come off during our sex either. "It's just the purpose of the shower earlier is now irrelevant."

After we've cleaned up, again, we lay in bed together, ready to sleep.

Christian said he has work to catch up on, but said he'd stay with me until I fall asleep.

"Christian..." I trail off not knowing how to say it, like there's some other way around the actual words.

"What is it, baby?" He asks, holding me in his arms.

It's ironic how moments earlier I was ready to scream it out during sex, but now I can't find the courage to even whisper the words.

I smile when I feel him kiss my head and nuzzling his nose in my hair. The shirt I'm wearing has slipped up and my ass is fully exposed. He's still only wearing his boxer briefs, but his front is touching my back so I can feel him trying not to get hard, because he knows I need sleep. He moves his hand from my stomach, placing it on my bare hip, rubbing his thumb in circles. It's distracting

"You want more?" He teases, thinking I'm going to ask for more sex, when I don't say anything.

 _Just say it, Ana!_ _You've already told him you're falling, just tell him_.

"Iloveyou." I blurt out, like it's one word.

* * *

 **A/N:  
Con; _This story has more cliffhangers than the Grand Canyon._  
Pro; _I update often._**


	25. (25) The Calm Before The Storm

**CPOV**

 _~MOND_ _AY_ _EARLY AFTERNOON~_

"Ana, please. ... Baby, answer your phone. You know how I worry. Call me back, text me, just let me know you're okay." I sigh, running my hand through my hair before I change my tone to my Dom voice. "Anastasia, if I don't hear from you by the end of business today, I'm going to... Fuck!" I hang up, tossing my cell onto my desk in my office, then rubbing my face with my hand.

"You fucked up now, Grey." I mumble to myself as I stare at the man's reflection in the floor to ceiling windows in my office.

I should have just told her I love her, because I do. I can't believe that I do, but I do, I love her.

When she blurted it out last night like it was one word, I admit, I felt panicked. It wasn't until I was laying awake for hours last night, long after she fell asleep, it hit me like a ton of bricks. The unknown feelings I've never felt before, _is_ love. Flynn was right all along. I've not felt it before because I've not been in love before. That is until Anastasia Steele came into my life.

She's exquisite, honest, strong, witty, beguilingly, sweet, innocent; the list is endless, and everything I'm not. I'm in awe of her, how can I not love her?

I planned to tell her when we woke, but I had to be at _Grey House_ bright and early this morning to deal with this misplaced security ID issue, so I couldn't express how I felt, that, and Katherine was there, therefore, I couldn't tell Anastasia how I feel.

She seemed fine this morning, though. I woke before her so I could come to _Grey House_ earlier than usual, and I was leaving right as she and Katherine woke to have breakfast. Anastasia even gave me a sweet kiss goodbye and told me to have a good day at the office adding in a term of endearment, however, she could have been putting on a show for Katherine.

After I arrived at _Grey House_ , and settled things with the security issue, I did a lot of thinking about this love thing. I know I'm not right for her, I'm not the man for her, she deserves so much better than me. She can't love a monster and I can't make her happy. I can't be what she needs. She's good and pure, and I'm nothing but a fucked up monster. But I'm a selfish man and can't let her go. I want her, and the thought of anyone else having her is like a knife twisting in my dark soul.

I'm already in a mood from having to deal with this security bullshit issue. One of my GEH security employees misplaced his ID badge so that means all new ID badges for GEH security and a terminated employee. Fucker loses a laminate, what the fuck else will he lose. I had to do this without Taylor as I left him to give the girls a safe ride to work, since Anastasia knows him and is comfortable with him, and I brought Sawyer with me. I drove myself in my R8 today but had Sawyer meet me here.

Taylor notified me when he arrived this morning, and confirmed that Anastasia got off on the publishing floor. So I know Anastasia is here and she's also received her new GEH ID that allows her full access to any area of the building, including me. It's two minutes until her lunch break ends, and there's no proof she's left the building, so I know she's here, but I haven't heard from her.

I haven't heard a peep from her all morning, regardless of my relentless trying to communicate with her; between messages, emails, and phone calls. I've even called her extension so I can get her on personal GP phone at her desk, but she doesn't answer that either. It's set to go straight to voicemail so her colleagues don't even answer. She must have forgot to switch it back over from when she was on leave due to Linc's funeral.

I get that she's working and busy, but she could have at least replied to my emails and texts during her breaks. I expected her to respond during her lunch hour but that's almost over and she's not returned to her desk yet. I know because I've sent Andrea down there every 5 minutes to check if Anastasia has returned.

I'm not too worried since it's not shown on the main entrance security cameras of her leaving the building. She's probably in the building somewhere. _But where?_ I can't even call Sawyer to find out her location because he didn't notice her leave the publishing floor. I'm two fucking seconds away from tracking her phone. She may be upset with me regarding our conversation last night, but with this suspected break-in at her apartment... _Fuck it!_

"Barney." I say through my phone when he answers. "I need you to trace a phone. Anastasia Steele. I need to know where she is."

 _"Yes, Mr. Grey."_

"Top priority."

 _"I'll get right on it, sir."_

"I'll hold while you do."

 _"One moment, sir."_

I hear a bunch of clicks before he's back on minutes later.

 _"Sir, Ms. Steele's phone has been turned off, however, I was able to locate her phone's last known location."_

"Well, let's hear it." I growl impatient.

 _"Esclava, sir."_

"Escala?" I ask, hoping that's what he said and I heard him wrong.

 _"No, sir. Esclava Salons."_ He corrects me.

That's what I thought he said.

* * *

 **APOV**

 _~MONDAY_ _M_ _ORNING~_

 _"Iloveyou." I blurt out, like it's one word, holding my breath waiting for his reaction, which comes immediate when I feel his body tense behind me._

Fuck! What did I do?! Was saying the actual words too much?

 _"I know." He sounds... sad._

He knows?!

 _"You- You know?"_

 _"Yes, I know." He still sounds sad._

 _"Do you... Do you love me?" I ask, hopeful since he hasn't kicked me out of his bed, or his life. Yet._

 _I feel as if I may pass out from holding my breath, waiting for him to answer, but it's like he's fallen asleep. I'm much too afraid to move, but I know he's not sleeping. I can't hold my breath any longer and slowly exhale._

 _"Christian?" I breathe his name._

Please say something. _I internally beg him._

 _"I care for you, Anastasia, more than anything." I smile when I hear him say this, but that smile slowly fades as he continues. "I know you love me, I really wish you didn't, I don't deserve your love. You shouldn't love me. I know I should have let you go when you told me you were falling in love with me, but I'm a selfish man, and I want you."_

 _"Why shouldn't I love you?" I finally turn to face him, but he wont look at me._

 _"I'm a monster, Anastasia. I don't deserve love."_

 _"Christian, that's just not true, how can you think that?"_

 _"If you knew... You would leave me and I can't let that happen. I can't live without you."_

He can't live without me? If that's not a declaration of love, I don't know what is.

 _"I love you." I pull his reluctant face towards me and continuously kiss him. "I love you, Christian, I know you love me too."_

 _"Ana..." He moves my hand from his face and pulls away from me. "Don't..."_

 _"Why? Why is it so wrong for me to love you?"_

"I'm sure everything will be fine." Kate brings me from my thoughts of last night as we ride to work together with Taylor driving us.

"Yeah." I say absentmindedly.

She doesn't know about Christian not saying he loves me.

He may not have said the actual words, but he didn't say he didn't love me either. He said he cares about me, but I know he loves me, I know it. His actions speak louder than words. I just don't understand why he wont just tell me. At least he didn't leave me when I told him how I felt.

"Christian changed the locks for our apartment and my dad is talking with the landlord about adding security cameras. I'm sure my dad, and even Christian, would pay for them if he can't afford them." She thinks that I'm concerned with our break-in, which I am, but I'm more distracted with my thoughts from the conversation I had with Christian last night.

"We'll stay at Bob's house in Bellevue until everything is taken care of." She continues when I stay quiet. "I'm sure Christian will want you to stay with him again tonight, so I'll stay with Elliot, but if we have to, we can stay at Bob's or with my parents."

"Right."

"Hey," She calls my attention so I finally make eye contact with her. "Everything will be okay."

I give her what I hope is a reassuring smile.

Taylor pulls up to the _Seattle Times_ building and gets out to open Kate's door.

"Will you be needing a ride home, Ms. Kavanagh?" Taylor asks her when he opens the rear door.

"No, thanks."

"Are you sure, Kate?" I ask.

"Elliot's going to pick me up." She explains, reminding me. "I'm staying with him tonight."

"Oh, right. Okay."

Kate heads into the building, Taylor drives me to _Grey House_ , and I sit back trying to not to think of last night. Try as I might, it's impossible.

 _How can he think he's a monster? Why does he think he doesn't deserve to be loved? Because he enjoys BDSM?_ Well, I enjoy it as well. Okay, only the soft, less hardcore side, but still. Does that make me a monster? _No._ The only thing I can think of is the bitch-troll put some bullshit in his head about love, brainwashing him. She's already manipulated her friend and him enough. It always comes back to her, she must be part of it. I think it's time to pay _my_ salons a visit, but how in the world will I do that without Christian knowing?

Taylor parks in the RESERVED C. GREY parking spot in the underground parking of _Grey House_ , then gets out to open my door.

"Ana?" I hear a familiar voice ask in surprise.

 _Shit!_

I turn around to face Claire who looks shocked at seeing me; probably because I'm getting out of a SUV that belongs to the CEO.

I'm not sure if Claire would tell everyone what she saw, but I do get all the SIP/GP gossip from her.

"Hi, Claire." I smile like it's an everyday thing, for me to be seen getting out of CEO's SUV. Which I'm sure it will be since I've agreed to stay with Christian until whoever broken into Kate's apartment, that I share with her, is caught. I didn't even think about the fact that we have no proof, which means they could never be caught. And we have agreed to come out publicly after he's met my parents. I'm hoping to introduce him to my dad soon, probably this weekend, so next week we'll be official, publicly official. Once we're official, everyone will know, but until he meets my dad, I don't want it getting out that we're together.

"What..." She's dumbfounded. "What are you doing in _Mr. Grey's_ car?"

"Umm." _Think, Ana!_ "Mmmy.. car broke and um..." I look at Taylor for help.

"Ms. Steele's father and I are old buddies; military." He explains the lie smoothly. "She called me, saying she needed a ride. I was already out and we were both heading to _Grey House_ so I picked her up."

"Oh." She buys the lie.

I seriously need to learn how to do that, although it's not polite to lie, sometimes it's necessary.

Claire, Taylor, and I all board the same elevator together.

Claire and I get off at the publishing floor, and Taylor continues up to the 20th floor.

Claire sits behind the reception desk with the other receptionists for GP and just before I head to my desk she calls me over.

I walk over to the reception desk, hoping she doesn't question me further in front of the other employees.

"Martha had to call in. She said you can take the day or work on the manuscripts from last week if you haven't finished." She reads the message from her computer. "And security on the main floor needs to speak with you."

"Oh. I finished the manuscripts in Georgia so I'll just take the day. I have a few errands I want to run anyway and I can just do that now." I say thinking of the bitch-troll. _This is perfect!_

I didn't even walk to my desk and I'm done for the day. It would have been nice if I knew this before I came to work. I could have slept in at my boyfriend's apartment. I can't help but smile, thinking of my boyfriend, but then I remember he wont admit he loves me and I know he does.

I have a mission today: confront the bitch-troll. But first I need to see security on the main floor. Why wouldn't Taylor tell me before I came all the way up to the publishing floor? Maybe because Claire was with us? No, Claire thinks Taylor is my father's friend, and she's the one who told me about security needing to see me anyway. _Hmmmm._ Maybe since he was with me this morning instead of here, he wouldn't know yet. I don't know.

After I leave the manuscripts I finished in Georgia at my desk, I ride the elevator back to the main floor, wondering what security needs from me.

The security office door is open so I knock on the open door to capture their attention.

"May I help you, ma'am?" One of the men, wearing the typical MIB suits, asks me. Although, unlike Taylor, this man is displaying a GEH security laminate with his photo and name on the ID, similar to all GEH employee IDs.

"Hi, yes, my name is Anastasia Steele." I walk into the room now. "I was told security needed to speak with me."

"Yes, Ms. Steele." He grabs something off a desk. "We have a new laminate for you, ma'am."

"I'm sorry, what? What's wrong with my old ID badge?"

"I'm just the messenger, Miss. I was told to give you a new ID badge is all." He says, handing me a new GEH ID with my photo already on it and a logo that says all access.

 _Christian._

I look up, hearing a beep and see day light as another security guard enters the room.

"Can I use that exit?" I ask him as I point to the door.

"You can do whatever you like, according to your new GEH ID." He nods to it in my hand.

"Thank you." I smile politely and leave _Grey House_ through the back security exit.

 _Shit!_ I don't have my car or a ride. I can't very well ask Christian or Taylor to give me a ride to confront the bitch-troll. Kate's at work and doesn't have her car. I know how Christian feels about Chad so I don't want to ask him for a ride. I could just walk home to get my car, but I'm wearing heels and it's quite the distance. Wait, I can ask Steph.

 _"Hi, Ana!"_ She answers my call cheerfully.

"Hey, Steph. Um, could you give me a ride? I don't have to work today and Christian drove me so I don't have my car."

 _"Oh. I left my car at Chad's. He's going to pick me up after he finishes up some paperwork for the restaurant. You could try him."_

"Okay, thanks. I think I'll just call a cab." I don't want to upset Christian by asking Chad to pick me up.

 _"Darn. I thought maybe if he picks you up, he'll pick me up sooner than planned."_ She giggles.

Well... I guess Chad would be the faster option, as this is time sensitive, and we are friends. I don't want to end my friendship with him, just because Christian doesn't like him. And he is with Stephanie now so maybe it wont be so bad if I ask Chad for a ride after all.

 _Did anyone tell Christian that Chad and Stephanie are together after I passed out that Friday night?_

"Chad?" I ask when he answers.

 _"Hey, Ana. What's up?"_

"I don't mean to bother you, but can you give me a ride, if you're not too busy? I'm at work without my car and I'm not needed for the day."

 _"Sure. You at_ Grey House _then?"_

"Yes. I'm at _Grey House_."

 _"Gives me an excuse to take a break from all this paperwork. I'll be there soon."_

"Thanks." I giggle at his excuse to stop working. I'm sure Steph will benefit from him no longer working on the restaurant paperwork.

 _"No problem. See ya shortly."_

I'll have to wait about 20 minutes for Chad to arrive so as I wait I look through my phone to give me something to do.

I have a few texts from Christian. They are all pretty similar and don't require a response; _I miss you,_ _have a good day_ _,_ and such. Thankfully he doesn't know I'm not working today... yet. I'm sure he'll figure out, that I'm no longer at work, however, he was out of the office for a week and will need to stay until late tonight. At least that's what he told me. The texts are nothing that really require a response so I'll just wait until after I leave the salons to reply. I want to talk to the bitch first without him knowing so I just wont respond to his texts, at least until after I've spoken to her.

I hear a car and look up.

Seeing it's Chad, I walk to the passenger door before he has a chance to get out and open it for me, and hop in his car.

"Thanks." I say as I put on my safety belt. "Can you drop me at my apartment?"

"Sure." He begins to drive toward my apartment building. "So where's Grey?"

"He's working. How's it going Steph?"

"Wonderful." I see the smile and I know it well. I smile that smile when I think about Christian.

"Eeek!" I squeal a little in excitement. "I'm so happy for you!" I can't contain my face splitting grin.

"I guess I can't hide it, can I?" He chuckles.

"Nope. There's no disguising it. That's the look of a man in love." Christian has that look. That's another reason I know he does love me.

"I admit it. I'm in love, and she loves me too. It's great."

"You two sure do move fast." _I'm one to talk but,_ "You haven't been together very long."

"I guess when you know, you know." He shrugs. "I can't thank you enough for introducing us."

"You're welcome."

I try to be happy for him, but it's proving difficult when my man wont admit his feelings to me.

"What about you?" He asks me. "Are you happy?"

"I am." I _am_ happy with Christian, but after last night's conversation, I don't sound very enthused about it, try as I might.

He frowns. "Ana."

"Everything's fine." I assure him.

"Why doesn't it sound fine?"

"We just... see things differently."

"I don't want to interfere with your relationship, but if you need me, I'm here for you. Friends, remember."

"Thanks, Chad. I'm sure it will be fine."

It doesn't take Chad long to arrive at my apartment. I thank him and put my hand on the handle to open the door but before I get out, I turn to Chad.

"Chad... Do you think you're a monster because you enjoy BDSM?" I ask him, thinking of what Christian said since Chad is also a BDSM Dominant who practices the more hardcore stuff, like Christian. Well, like Christian did.

"No. We're all different and enjoy different things, Anastasia. I enjoy BDSM, that doesn't make me a monster. You don't, that doesn't make you 'normal'. Not everyone likes the same thing. Is that why you left me? You thought I was a monster?"

"NO." I quickly reassure him, shaking my head. "I just wondered is all. You know, because your lifestyle is so dark compared to a more conventional way."

"Is he treating you well?" He looks suspiciously at me.

"Yes." I stress more determined and confident than earlier when he asked if I was happy. "He's great to me."

"You love him." It's a statement, not a question.

"I do." I give him a small smile and get out. "Thanks again for the ride." I say before I shut the door.

Instead of going inside my apartment, which I'm not sure I want to do again, I walk to my car.

I get my keys out of my bag and get in.

Chad waits until I pull out of my parking spot before he drives off, I assume in the direction of Steph's house.

One of the Esclava Salons is not too far from my apartment so I make my way to that one first. If she's not there, I guess I'll forget about our confrontation unless I can figure out where the other location is. My paperwork regarding the salons is in my suitcase, and my suitcase is at Escala, so I could just go there to find out the other location, but I'm sure it wont be long until Christian finds out what I'm doing and puts a stop to it.

Luck is on my side today as a spot opens up directly in front of Esclava. I park and get out, walking into the salon like I own the place. _Because I do_.

"Good morning," A blonde receptionist, wearing a white uniform, sitting behind a white polished desk, greets me when I walk up to her. "Welcome to Esclava, do you have an appointment?"

"Hi. My name is Anastasia Steele." I sound confident as I channel my inner CEO/Domme persona. I have Christian to thank for that. "I'm the new owner." She certainly looks surprised at that. "I'd like to speak to Ms. Lincoln. Is she in?"

She seems to be in a stupor, just starring at me in shock.

"Greta." I call her by the name on her tag, gaining her attention back to what I need.

"I- I'm sorry, Ms. Steele." She blinks out of it. "Ms. Lincoln doesn't usually come to this location," _Shoot!_

So that's why I didn't see her when Christian first brought me here for the Coping Together charity event. She's not usually at this location.

"However, we've had a stylist call in sick and she's on her way to cover."

"Great."

I look around the white sterile salon. Everything is highly polished and shinning too bright and glossy. It's not too busy, with only two clients, though it is early. I wonder if there's somewhere we can talk privately so others don't hear our conversation.

"Is there somewhere private I can wait for her until she arrives?"

"Her-. Um... The office is located just down the hall and to the right." She points out then hands me a key.

"Thank you." _That was easy_.

I accept the key from her, and walk towards the back office.

 _This_ is who Elena has running the front? She didn't even question me saying I owned the place and now she gives me a key to Elena's office. I've obviously never fired anyone before, I don't think I could, but this girl needs some retraining.

Using the key, I unlock the office door and sit behind the desk where I wait for Elena.

While I wait my phone goes off with an incoming call. _Fuck, it's Christian!_ He's probably found out where I am!

I ignore the call, knowing he'll tell me to leave, then I turn my phone off. Hopefully he hasn't figured out where I am, but that's wishful thinking. I'm going to be in so much trouble, I know, but I feel like I have to do this.

Elena better hurry before Christian stalks me and puts a kibosh on my plans. I'm sure it wont be long before Christian arrives.

Luckily it doesn't take long for the office door to swing wide open, revealing a not so happy Elena Lincoln.

"Hello, Elena." I say as smugly as I can.

"Anastasia." She says brightly, smiling politely, like she's actually happy to see me.

"Please. Sit." I'm hoping I portray the Domme she thinks I am as I continue to stay seated behind her desk and offering her a chair on the other side.

* * *

 **A/N: _The next few chapters may be a bit confusing so pay attention to the italics/time of day. Just like this chapter.  
(~MONDAY MORNING/AFTERNOON~) _**


	26. (26) EX Confrontations

**APOV**

 _~MOND_ _AY_ _MORNING~_

It doesn't take long for the office door to swing wide open, revealing a not so happy Elena Lincoln.

"Hello, Elena." I say as smugly as I can.

"Anastasia." She says brightly, smiling politely, like she's actually happy to see me.

"Please. Sit." I'm hoping I portray the Domme she thinks I am as I continue to stay seated behind her desk and offering her a chair on the other side.

"I admit, I knew this day would come, but I honestly did not expect you so soon." She's still overly sweet, sitting where I told her to.

I may not be a Domme, but she doesn't scare me. The last time we had a confrontation, Taylor and Christian had my six. Now we are alone, however, I'm unintimidated by her. Perhaps because I have the upper hand here as well. I own controlling shares in her precious salon business. And that's when it hits me... She's being friendly because I own her ass.

"You can drop the act, Elena. The only one you're fooling is yourself."

"I know we've gotten off on the wrong foot, however, I thought we could start fresh." She smiles a very convincing smile. "Become friends."

"Friends?" I snort, very un-lady like. "I'm sorry, but if the way you treat your 'friends' is to manipulate them and fuck their children behind their backs, I'd much rather we _not_ be _friends_."

"You don't understand, Anastasia. I was helping him. I helped him gain control."

"I think you're the one misunderstanding, however, I did not come here to give you a lecture of what is right and wrong. I came here to talk to you about Christian. I realize there's something about his past that has him so reluctant, and I believe you are the common denominator. You fucked him up with your sick dominatrix pedophilia shit."

"Anastasia, I know what you think of me, and I cannot change that. But-."

"Even if you waited until his 16th birthday, to where he could _legally_ give consent, how can you not see what you did was wrong? What if it was your child? How would you feel if this happened to your child?"

"You didn't know him back then," Of course she avoids my questions. "He was so out of control. I honestly wanted to help him, and I did."

"I'm quite sure you did." I reply sarcastically. "You've brainwashed and manipulated him, that was extremely helpful, and now he doesn't believe he's deserving of love."

"Love? That's what this is about."

I don't respond, I just glare at her.

"Anastasia, I've never seen him this happy. It must be obvious to you that Christian is in love with you."

"He is." I agree with meaning, because he is, regardless of him not saying the actual words to me.

"That's great." She smiles, but now it looks almost forced.

"Funny, just days earlier you were singing a very different tune. Forgive me if I don't believe your bullshit today."

"I admit I was jealous. I wanted Christian back. Can you blame me?"

"Wanted." I repeat the word she used. "You don't want him anymore?"

"I can see that he's head over heels in love. As much as I disagree with your relationship, I wont interfere with that."

Again she avoids answering my question. I'm not getting anywhere with her. She's too good of a manipulator. _Why did I even come here?!_

"Since I'm here," I change the subject, not wanting to continue. "I wanted to let you know, I'm keeping the salons. And if you haven't already figured it out, I will be holding them against you. I want you to end your so-called friendship with Christian's mother."

"Excuse me?"

"It's _sick_ that you call yourself her friend with what you've done to her child. If you don't want your salons sold off piece by piece, or whatever my imagination can dream up, you'll end your friendship with Grace Grey, effective immediately. I'd like it if you told her what kind of sick fuck you really are, however, that would only hurt Christian, so you can tell her whatever bullshit you need to, but that's what will happen."

"And if you come up with another thing to blackmail me with?" She glares at me now with her cold blue eyes, her phony politeness from earlier long gone.

"You'll do it." I say simply.

"This is my lively hood, Anastasia."

"Do I look like I care?!" I jump up, letting my emotions show, putting my hands flat on the desk. "If you don't like it, go work somewhere else. You're not a registered sex offender, like you very well should be. You don't have a prison record, like you most definitely should have. It should be easy enough for you to find another place of employment. End your _friendship_ with Grace, or I will burn your precious salons to the fucking ground, you sick bitch!"

I don't want to be here a moment longer so I walk towards the door. She stays quiet but follows me with her eyes, turning in her seat since the door is behind her.

"Oh!" I say before I open the door "And I will be changing the name... Don't think I don't know what Esclava stands for." I may not know many Spanish words, but José has taught me a few words. We were joking around one day, so I know _exactly_ what Esclava means.

"It's meant women are slaves to beauty."

"Ha! You and I both know that's not why you named the salons Esclava. I may just change the name to Envy, since it's so obvious you're an envious bitch." I tell her just before I open the door. "Anyway, if I have any other demands you better believe you will do them."

"You're my bitch now!" I call out as I walk away.

* * *

 **CPOV**

 _~MO_ _NDAY_ _EARLY AFTERNOON~_

 _"Sir, Ms. Steele's phone has been turned off, however, I was able to locate her phone's last known location."_

"Well, let's hear it." I growl impatient.

 _"Esclava, sir."_

"Escala?" I ask, hoping that's what he said and I heard him wrong.

 _"No, sir. Esclava Salons."_ He corrects me.

That's what I thought he said, but I was hoping I heard wrong.

 _"The salon located in the Pike Market District, sir."_

I let out a sigh as I hang up.

I don't know what the fuck Anastasia is doing at Esclava, obviously she's seeing Elena, but why.

I try to call Anastasia again but it goes straight to her voicemail; as Barney said, the phone is off.

Instead of waiting around here all fucking day, I stand, putting my suit jacket on, and walk out of my office while I button it.

"Andrea," I snap as soon as I open my office door, but she's not at her desk. She must be down on the publishing floor again, checking if Anastasia is there.

Before I'm able to call the elevator it chimes it's arrival. The doors open, revealing Andrea.

"Oh." She's steps off surprised to see me. "Mr. Grey, Ms. Steele isn't at her desk yet,"

"I fucking know that!"

"Yes, sir, however, I did speak with a GP employee who told me Ms. Steele was given the day off, sir."

"That would have been nice to know hours earlier, Andrea!" I bark at her, gripping my hand through my hair.

"I apologize, sir." She's unaffected by my outbursts by now.

"I need you to cancel everything I have for the rest of today and reschedule my meetings. Anything of importance, send it to Ros."

"Yes, sir."

"Is this your new management approach?" Ros asks as she enters the hall, presumably to start our meeting. "To not be here?"

"Not now, Ros." I growl as I call the elevator back.

"Christian, we have meetings. Important meetings that can not be canceled or rescheduled. You've been gone all week, and the first day you're back, you're leaving early?" She snaps. "What the fuck, Christian? This isn't like you."

"I have an emergency." I explain, boarding the elevator, and hitting the garage floor button. "Take care of it."

I don't know why the fuck Anastasia decided to visit the salons, and I know she can handle her own as she showed that in my office, but Taylor and I were there to back her up. If anything happened, we would have been there within a matter of seconds.

Why wouldn't Anastasia just tell me she wanted to visit the salons, or see Elena. I have no idea why she would even want to see Elena, but she's alone now, and nobody knew she was there. I don't think Elena will physically harm Anastasia but she can tell Anastasia shit about me, fucked up shit that Anastasia doesn't need to hear, and Elena did succeed in breaking us up once before with bullshit lies, she can do far more damage with truth.

When the elevator arrives in the parking garage, I rush to my R8, get in and speed off towards Esclava.

It takes me no time at all to pull up and park in front of the salon.

"Good afternoon, Mr. Grey." Greta the receptionist purrs when I stroll passed her desk.

I give her a quick nod, not stopping to bother with pleasantries, as I continue through the salons.

I see Elena immediately, as she stands out from the other employees who wear white while Elena wears black. She's washing a customer's hair, but that doesn't stop me from pulling her away and walking her to the back office with my hand firmly on her bicep. Elena calls on someone to cover for her before we make it to the office.

"I expected you here hours ago." She smiles at me.

I clench my jaw and wait until we are alone in her office before I start conversing.

As soon as we're at the back office, I push her inside, shut the door behind me and begin.

"Where's Anastasia?"

"She left." She walks towards her desk with confidence.

"Why was she here?"

"You're not in control of your Submissive, Christian, she's doing all kinds of crazy things without your permission. Oh, that's right!" She exclaims, like she remembered something, and sits behind her desk. "She's not your Submissive, you're hers."

"Why. Was. She. Here." I repeat each word slowly and clearly.

"She wanted to talk to me about you."

"Me?"

 _Fuck, what the fuck did Elena say?_

"You." She confirms with a sly smile. "She wanted to understand why you can't love."

 _Fuck!_

"What did you say?" I ask wary of what she's told Anastasia.

"I simply told her you are head over heels, darling, and you wouldn't admit it."

"Why would you say that?"

"Because it's the truth, Christian, and I was only trying to help. I'm happy for you by the way."

"You've always said love was for fools." I remind her.

"It is." She agrees. "However, I am happy for you nonetheless, and I wish you the best. But it wont last. It never does."

"What else happened?"

"Well, I don't want to lose your friendship, so I offered her a truce, my friendship, and she laughed in my face." She says offended now. "Then she left."

"That's Anastasia." Speaking of which; she's not here. _Where is she?_ "I have to go."

I leave before she can say anything more.

In my R8 I loosen my tie and take it off as I try to think of where she could be. She wouldn't be at her apartment, surely not with the potential break-in. Perhaps she went back to Escala. But why would she turn her cell off? And if she was going to turn it off, why wouldn't she turn it off before she went to see Elena? She had to of known I wouldn't approve of this and would track her phone. My only thought is she's doing something worse that would cause me to worry. But what could possibly be worse than meeting with my ex-Domme whom she despises?

Before I drive I send Barney an email requesting Anastasia's phone location records for today. I want to know where she's been since she left my apartment this morning. I'm fucking stalking her now, but what does she expect me to do when she wont respond to my calls or messages.

I try Anastasia's cell a few more times, on my hands-free while I drive, but it goes to her voicemail each time.

I arrive at Escala in record time, and I'm relieved to see Anastasia's car parked in the stall.

Andrea said Anastasia didn't work today, and she was up late last night with our fucking and talking, so she must be tired and sleeping.

I ride up to my apartment and as soon as I arrive I head straight for the bedroom.

When I open the door, the bed is made and empty. I search every inch of my room, ensuite, and closet, looking for her, but I can't find any trace of her being here. _Odd._

I walk back out to search the rest of the apartment, and notice Gail in the kitchen cleaning up. If Anastasia is here, Gail will know where.

"Good afternoon, Mr. Grey." Gail says a little surprised to see me home so soon in the day.

"Gail." I nod to her. "Have you seen Anastasia?"

"Other than this morning at breakfast, sir, no I haven't."

"She's not here?" I ask confused since her car is parked in the garage.

"No, sir. Not that I know of."

I run my fingers through my hair.

 _Where the fuck is she?_

Her car is here so she must be.

My phone buzzes so I quickly fish it out of my pocket, thinking it may be Anastasia, but it's just Barney's email of Anastasia's whereabouts until she turned her cell off. I stop dead in my tracks when I read it. She started out here at Escala this morning, then it shows she went to _Seattle Times_ presumably to drop off Kavanagh, she then went to _Grey House_ but almost immediately after arriving she went to her apartment, then to Esclava. She turned her cell off while there. It shows she turned her cell back on when she came here to Escala, but what's stopped me is that it shows she returned to Esclava after she came here and that is her phone's last known location, like Barney said.

If she returned to Esclava, and her car is here, how the fuck did she get there?!

I feel the tiny hairs on the back of my neck prickle, and I remember Anastasia's saying about horses and zebras. I pray it's a horse but I have a feeling it's a fucking zebra. Something's happened, I fucking know it.

Instead of doing anything more, I head straight to the security office. If her cell said she was here, and her car is in the parking garage, surely the CCTVs picked up on how she left. Unless she walked out the front lobby, which I could then look at the main security footage.

Just as I'm rewinding the footage to the time her cell said she was here, Taylor walks in looking furious, presumably because I left _Grey House_ without notifying him. Well, I'm just as furious. I have him hire a guy to cover Anastasia, and the fucker doesn't even notice her leave the fucking building. Taylor pulls his chair out, sitting quietly next to me, as I play the video.

I'm transfixed on the monitors, trying to find her, when I catch a glimpse of her car park in the last PENTHOUSE stall.

The fucking garage cameras I have only cover my section so I don't see her pull in.

She gets out of her car and begins to walk towards the elevator as she pulls her phone out of her bag. I huff and roll my eyes seeing this. I've been trying to get ahold of her all day, she's been avoiding my calls and messages, and now I see she's messing with her phone. Obviously she's gotten my messages, why the fuck doesn't she respond or call me? _Because she doesn't think you love her, Grey_.

 _"Ms. Steele."_ I hear an eerily voice come through the monitors and my scalp now tingles as my heartbeat picks up.

Anastasia quickly turns around started.

Since the cameras only cover my section of the garage, I can't see the woman talking to Anastasia.

 _"Yes?"_ Anastasia replies cautiously.

 _"Anastasia Steele?"_ The feminine voice checks.

 _"Yes. May I help you?"_

 _"No."_

"No?" I ask the screen confused and frown.

 _"Okay?"_ Anastasia is as confused as I am. _"Well, I'm going to go now."_

Anastasia takes a cautious step back and toward the elevator without taking her eyes off the mysterious female, I assume, but stops for some reason.

 _"You look like me."_ Anastasia observes.

"No." I mumble to myself, fearing the worst.

 _"Master likes obedient ones that look like you and me._ _Master is dark."_

"Fuck!" _I knew it!_ It's a previous Sub of mine.

 _What the fuck must Anastasia think?!_

She's met a previous Sub of mine, Stephanie, now this one is telling her I like my women exactly the same. And the proof is starring her in the face.

I strain to listen, to see if I can recognize her voice, but I can't place it, I've had so many.

 _"What do you have that I don't?"_ The mystery Sub continues.

 _"What do you mean?"_ Anastasia asks, now more alert.

 _"Master..._ _Master is happy, I have seen him. He laughs and smiles. These reactions are rare... Very rare for him."_

My gaze shoots to Taylor and he looks just as pissed as I am, that a potential threat was in close proximity to me, and he didn't catch it.

 _"Um..."_ Anastasia trails off, obviously not knowing how to respond to that. She's only ever seen me happy.

 _"Mistress said he gives you more."_ The mystery Sub continues, and I become furious, knowing who she's talking about.

"Elena." I growl aloud. _That. Fucking. Bitch._

 _"She said you're allowed to call him by his given name. That you sleep in his bed. You are able to look into his eyes and touch him freely. She said that you are intimate during the week, not just weekends. And here you are, on a Monday."_ She says to point out as proof.

"How the fuck would she know any of that?!" I didn't mention any of this to Elena. Either she somehow knows, or she's bullshitting and guessed correctly.

 _"You're his girlfriend."_ She accuses Anastasia. _"I wanted more. I've asked him for it before, and he wouldn't give it to me. Instead he ended our beautiful relationship._ _Mistress said if I got rid of you, Master will want me back and will give me more._ _"_

Anastasia's eyes widen, and the Sub finally steps into the camera's view. I still can't see who it is, as I can only see the back of a brunette's head, and all of my Submissives, excluding Elena, were brunettes.

When the Sub steps further onto the screen, my eyes widen with Anastasia's. My heart is about to beat out of my chest, and I'm ready to jump up from my chair and run downstairs, when I see the gun pointed at Anastasia. However, this has happened earlier in the day and they are no longer down there so it would be useless for me to go down there now. Instead my sight is glued to the screens and I am literally sitting on the edge of my seat.

I jump with fear as Anastasia squeals when the Sub fires a shot. My heart has officially dropped out of my chest and has stopped completely.

The shot startles Anastasia as much as it did me, causing her to drop her phone. Thank fuck Anastasia takes off running, hiding behind cars.

The Sub turns to follow Anastasia, giving me a glimpse of her face, and I immediately recognize her as Leila Williams.

Another shot is fired followed by another squeal from Anastasia.

Leila picks up Anastasia's phone then follows in the direction that Anastasia went.

I can't see anymore, but I hear another shot coming from the CCTV audio, however, this time I hear a yelp of pain follow.

"NO!" I jump from my seat.

Wasting no time, Taylor and I run to the elevator.

The last known location of Anastasia's phone is Esclava Salons. Anastasia was here after she visited the salons and was using her phone. She dropped her phone on the garage ground so it's no longer in her possession. Elena was calm when I visited her, therefore, she must assume I tracked Anastasia's phone to the Salons from her earlier visit and not the second visit. And Barney's email confirms that Anastasia's phone was at Esclava twice. It's obvious that Elena somehow influenced or coerced Leila, giving her misguided advice, to get her to harm Anastasia on Elena's behalf.

That last shot and the yelp of pain has me on edge. If they harmed one hair on Anastasia's head, I will be going to prison for murder.

Taylor boards the elevator with me as soon as it arrives, and we ride down together.

"I'm going to have a little discussion with Elena." I tell him as the elevator goes at a painstakingly slow pace.

 _Has the elevator always been this fucking slow?!_

"I want you out looking for Anastasia." I continue. "I want everyone on this. Do not stop until you've found her. Check..." _Fuck!_ I run my fingers through my hair, gripping it to the point of pain. "Check the hospitals."

"Sir." He agrees, but I know he wants to say more.

"Also find out how no one saw or heard anything from their encounter in the parking garage."

"I'm on it, sir."

As we exit the elevator, I get the chills being in the same location as the encounter when Leila fired her weapon at Anastasia. I can see a small indentation in the brick from the bullet, no doubt it ricocheted off the wall.

"Taylor." I call to him just before he enters the SUV. "Call the police. Tell them what happened and... And give them the video."

"Are you sure, sir?" I know he's only checking because I would normally go to great lengths to hide my lifestyle from outsiders, including the police.

"Yes."

"Sir, the woman in the video footage was addressing you in a revealing manor." He warns me.

"I know."

"I'll get right on, sir." He seems proud, but I ignore him.

I climb into my R8, ignoring every sign of caution that they provide; speeding my way towards Esclava for the second time today.

I don't know how the fuck I'm so fucking calm. My drive is silent, full of thoughts, as I race to get answers.

That video may reveal my lifestyle that I've wanted to keep hidden, but it also shows proof that Leila tried to kill Anastasia. It doesn't implicate Elena as her accomplice, because Leila referred to her only as Mistress, but I'm sure they can use it to charge Leila.

It's been hours since their encounter took place, according to the time stamp on the video, so where the fuck is Anastasia and why hasn't she contacted me yet? Did what Leila say get to her? _Fuck, I hope not._ Was she injuried? _FUCK, I hope not!_

I guess I'll find out now since I'm here.

I pull up the salon and park. Before I get out, I take off my suit jacket, leaving it inside my R8.

I roll my sleeves up to my elbows as I walk toward the building, throwing the door open, almost to the point where the glass shatters. Too bad it doesn't.

I don't bother stopping as I stride straight passed the reception desk, ignoring the flirtatious receptionist, making a B-line to Elena's office since I don't see her on the main floor.

Without warning, I burst open the office door, seeing Elena putting away a file.

I slam the door shut, and go after her. She barely has time to turn around before I slam the filing cabinet shut, toss the manila envelope from her hands onto the floor, and slam her against the wall with my hand around her throat.

"Where. Is. She." I growl in staccato, being sure she understands.

"Christian." She gasps, grabbing my forearm to the hand that is around her throat.

I squeeze adding more pressure when she doesn't answer me.

"Where! Is! She!" I repeat just the same as before, only louder, making sure she's heard me.

"Christian." This time she moans my name. I can see the desire in her eyes as they fill with lust.

 _Fuck!_ This shit is turning her on.

I may have acted Submissive in my office, letting Anastasia take control, but now I'm glad I did, as my power is a turn on for Elena. However, if she wants to fuck around, I will show her exactly who I am, the Dominant she trained me to be. The sick son-of-a-bitch sadist I really am.

"Elena, don't fuck with me. Where is Anastasia?"

"I told you, darling, she left."

"You're lying." My anger causes me to squeeze harder.

"You should know..." She moans. "This is highly arousing."

"You should know, I will crush your fucking throat if you don't start talking."

"When you release, I will have an _amazing_ release." Her eyes darken and her breathing has picked up.

I squeeze tighter around her throat, cutting off her air way now so she can no longer breath.

"I wont let go until you tell me where she is." I warn.

"Then.. you'll.. never.. know.." She chokes out.

"I will find her. You know I will." But it will be a lot easier and faster if Elena tells me where to find her. "It will only be worse for you if you don't tell me. I don't need you to tell me, but whether you do or not decides whether you live or not. Now, where is Anastasia?!"

I'm squeezing so hard, she's about to pass out so I loosen my grip a bit, but not enough to comfort her, that way she can speak.

"You're.. no.. longer.. the.. Dom.. I..-" She chokes out again, but this time I squeeze her throat to stop her from continuing.

"I'll show you the Dom I am now." I growl. Wrong thing to say to the woman aroused by pain, pain that I'm giving to her at this moment. "I swear to god, Elena, I will fucking kill you if one hair is out of place on Anastasia's head because of you."

"I.. I.. didn't.."

"Lei-la." Her eyes widen when I reveal I know. "Now where the FUCK is Anastasia?!"

"I.." She chokes no longer aroused. "I.. can't.. breath.. Christian."

"Then you better start talking." I growl, squeezing harder.

"I.. I.. Can't."

I glare at her, squeeze her throat so hard my hand shakes, then finally release her, seeing as she is on the edge of consciousness and I need information from her.

Elena falls to the floor in a coughing fit. She reaches for her desk, trying to get up, with her other hand on her throat.

"Where is she, Elena?!" I roar over her coughing.

 _cough cough cough_

"Elena!" I shout when she doesn't answer, just continuing to cough.

"Give.. _cough_ me.. _cough_ a.. fucking.. _cough cough_ minute!" She shouts through her coughing, holding her throat, when I start to go after her again.

"You better start fucking talking, Elena, or so help me, I will fucking kill you." My venom clear in my low tone.

"Don't be.. ridiculous, Christian,.. you will.. go to jail." She croaks after she's calmed her coughing, her voice sounding like shit.

"If you harmed Anastasia, I would gladly go to jail after killing you with a smile on my face. Now where is she?!"

"What is so special about her?! Huh?!" She tries to shout, but it just sounds like she's smoked one too many cigarettes. "You've known me for years, Christian! You've known her for five fucking minutes!"

"Why the fuck are you so jealous of her?" I ask, not understanding. "I've had plenty of women after you. Hundreds. We've been over for years, and you've never, not once, acted this way with any of the other women I have been with. Why are you so jealous of _her_?"

"Because I see the way you look at her!"

"You're jealous of her because I _want_ her?!"

"We were good together, baby, and you know it! We should be together now. Don't you see Christian? We belong together. We were made for each other. Nobody can satisfy your needs like I can." She pleads. "You get bored too easily and move onto the next without a second thought. I've kept you fully satisfied for years. Years! And you just throw it all away for some young new piece of ass every few months! They can't keep you satisfied like I did. Can't you see that?!"

"How the fuck is that going to look at my family's Christmas party, Elena? 'Hi, mom. Elena and I are together. It started when I was fifteen. Would you please pass the wine?' What in the actual fuck?!"

"You're an adult now. You don't need them, and you hardly ever visit your parents anyway. We only need each other, baby. Family is overrated." She tries desperately to convince me. "We could have been good together, Christian, and we were years earlier. We can be together freely now, and we should be."

"Get it through your fucking head, Elena! I. Don't. Want. You. The only reason why I was ever with you was because you gave me a release. That's what they were all used for. Every Submissive I have ever had was used for sex, just a way to get off. I don't want you. I don't want them. I want Anastasia. Now tell me where she is!"

"I helped you, Christian! I was your everything! You told me you loved me!" She shouts, sounding hurt. "Does that all mean nothing to you?!"

"I was fifteen! I didn't know what love was, and you were quick to tell me love is for fools after you whipped me for saying it, so why the fuck are you so fucking jealous?! What the fuck are you so pissed about?!"

"She took you from me!"

"I was never yours to claim, Elena! I haven't been yours in 7 damn years."

"You've always been mine, baby, and she's taken you from me! She's taking everything from me! That bitch is taking everything that's mine! She's finding Dominants for my girls, you've given her your Submission. Now she has control of my salons! She's threating me, holding them against me, unless I end my friendship with your mother! Do you know how influential having your mother as a friend is in this city?! For fuck's sake, just being acquaintances with you Grey's is like a fucking gold mine!"

"Your true colors are finally showing through, Elena. How I was so blind that I couldn't see you for what you really are, is beyond me. If you think being acquainted with the Grey's is like that, just wait until you are blacklisted by us Grey's. And don't worry about ending your friendship with my mother, your friendship will be over as soon as I tell her what you did to her fifteen year old son."

"You wouldn't." She dares challenge me.

"Elena." I smirk maliciously. "You and I both know if the gauntlet is thrown down, I will only be too happy to pick it up."

She pales, knowing it to be true.

"Now I'm going to ask you one last time. Where is Anastasia, Elena." It's not a question.

"I don't know." She's glaring at me now, full Dominant stance in place.

"Elena, I'm warning you." I'm standing just as Dominant. "You have five fucking seconds to tell me where Anastasia is or I wont think twice about snapping your neck."

"What the fuck, Christian?!" She stomps her foot like a fucking toddler not getting her way. "This little infatuation you have over this girl wont last. She'll never fully satisfy your needs, you're a hard man to please. I should know, I've been finding you Submissive women for nearly 9 damn years, and none have lasted as long as I have. You know I can please you, baby. Forget about her. Let me remind you of how good we were."

"TELL ME WHERE SHE IS!" I roar.

She starts to go off on a rant about us, how Anastasia is changing me, and how wrong Anastasia is for me. I can't stop myself from lunging at her again, grabbing her throat once more to shut her the fuck up.

"Your time is up." I growl, squeezing harder than I have before.

"She.. she.. got.. away." She gasps out in almost a whisper.

"I don't believe you." I growl through my teeth as I squeeze harder, glaring into her cold blue eyes.

"It's.. It's true." She barely breathes out, trying to push me away, but is obviously unable.

"I'm giving you one last chance to explain. If you don't tell me what I want to know, I will kill you without a second thought."

She must see the truth in my eyes, because she suddenly pales and tries to speak but can't, so she settles for trying to nod in agreement.

I release her again.

"Where is Leila?" I demand.

She'll be able to give me more information.

"That.. stupid unstable bitch." She's wheezing now, holding her throat. "I fed her.. a bunch of shit lies.. to get rid of the problem.. and the stupid bitch.. can't even do that right. ... She is.. in the hospital. ... A bullet.. ricocheted.. and hit.. the stupid bitch. ... I sent her.. to the hospital."

Let's hope Leila is the only one hurt.

"Where is Anastasia? I know you know."

"She.. got.. away." She repeats.

I don't believe her so I go after her again.

"It's true!" She shouts as best as she can, trying stop me from killing her with my bare hands. "Leila.. chased her. ... Said.. Ana.. she got.. into.. a car.. with some.. love sick boy. ... Leila.. brought her phone.. to me."

 _Love sick boy? Garrett?_

Before we can say anything more, someone pounds on the door like the fucking police, then it bursts open, revealing the police.

"Elena Lincoln?" One of them demands.

"Yes." Elena wheezes out, trying to sound and look elegant, as she poses professionally near her desk.

"You're under arrest for the attempted murder of Anastasia Steele."

The was fucking fast. I _just_ told Taylor to send the video minutes earlier, and they are already arresting her?

I'm surprised they ignore the red marks on her neck with hand prints all over it, but I'm thankful nonetheless.

As they are cuffing her, the bitch has a look of pleasure on her face as she looks at me. I glare at her as they walk her out, reading her her Miranda rights.

"Elena Lincoln, you have the right to remain silent. Anything you say-"

The police begin to search her office, pulling out paperwork after paperwork, even Anastasia's phone, putting it in an evidence bag

"Christian Grey?" One of the detectives asks me just before I walk out.

"Yes, sir." I confirm.

"What is your relation with Ms. Lincoln, if I may ask, Mr. Grey?" He questions me.

"She was a family friend and I was in business with her until recently. Ms. Steele is my girlfriend." I explain. "Leila Williams tried to shoot my girlfriend in the parking garage at my apartment. My security sent the video to the police department."

"I'm sorry you had to experience this, sir. I'm not sure if we've received the video as of yet, since I've been in the field, however, I'm sure it will be of help in prosecuting those involved when we receive it. We interviewed Ms. Williams at Seattle Grace when they notified us of a victim with a gunshot wound. She confessed to the crime, naming Ms. Lincoln as her accomplice. We'd like to speak with Ms. Steele."

"I'm not able to reach my girlfriend." I try to stay professional but the worry I feel is clear in my tone. "I've been trying to find her."

"We'll start a search party right away, sir. We already have officers and a crime scene unit located at Escala apartments where Ms. Williams said the event took place. If you make contact with Ms. Steele, or have any questions, you can call me directly. Here is my card." I accept the business card and put it into my pocket. "We'll find your girlfriend, Mr. Grey." He assures me.

"Thank you."

We shake hands, and I give him my business card to call me if they find anything or Anastasia before I do.

The police continue their search while I leave to continue searching for Anastasia myself.

Before I leave Esclava, I receive texts from Taylor saying the police now have possession of the garage footage, and Anastasia is still missing. She's not at any of the local Seattle hospitals and the only brunette girl to be admitted with a gun shot wound is Leila Williams. I suspect Welch and Barney are now helping, as well as whoever else Taylor pulled into this mess.

I stride to my R8 and floor it, heading towards Garrett's Bar and Grill.

Elena said, Leila said Anastasia ran into a love sick boy and left with him. Garrett is the only love sick boy I can think of that Anastasia would be with.

I arrive in record time.

When I walk in, the hostess is all flushed and fluttering lashes at me, the usual affect.

"Good afternoon, sir." She purrs. "May I seat you?"

"No."

I don't bother stopping, continuing to walk towards Garrett's office.

I try to open the door but it's locked so without a second thought, I kick it in.

When I get the door open, I'm about to have a heart attack at what I see.

Red; that's what I see.

And the back of Anastasia's head.

She's naked on her knees with her hands restrained behind her back in front of Garrett as he sits behind his desk in full Dom mode.

 _I've been worried sick and she's over here sucking Garrett off?!_

"WHAT THE FUCK?!"

"Grey?!" The fucker shouts when he notices me, no doubt hearing the wood splinter from the door being broken.

He quickly stands, simultaneously zipping his pants and trying to cover Anastasia's naked body with a leather jacket.

Anastasia screams when I throw a hard punch at Garrett, knocking him off his feet. He falls back, bringing his chair with him and landing on his ass.

"Oh my god!" She shouts in a higher than usual pitched voice when I make a start to go after him. "Mr. Grey!"

 _What?_

I stop, confused, as it's not Anastasia's voice I hear.

"Fuck." I breathe when I turn around to face the girl.


	27. (27) Where Is She?

**APOV**

 _~MO_ _NDAY_ _MORNING~_

After parking my car in an open PENTHOUSE space in Escala's underground parking garage, I get out and walk towards the elevator so I can go to Christian's apartment. I'm sure I can find something to occupy my time while I wait for him to come home.

Since I'm no longer with Mrs. Robinson, it's safe to send Christian a message now. I'm actually surprised he didn't turn up while I was talking to Elena. Maybe I was wrong and he didn't know I was there. He has been gone from his company all week, regardless of still conducting business in Georgia, so he's probably preoccupied with business. I'm not exactly sure what it is that he does, but one doesn't become a CEO by being lazy and sitting on their ass all day. _Um, well..._ He does sit in his office all day, but he's busy with business. I totally understand he's a busy man.

As I'm walking, I pull out my phone and turn it on, so I can let him know that I'm not working today and will be at Escala.

I know he'll be upset with me when he finds out I went to see Elena, and alone, but I had to understand why he wont say the words. Even though I got no clear answer as to why, it was still a productive meeting. I hope she'll end her friendship with Grace effective immediately, perhaps she'll leave town, but I'm not naïve enough to think it will be that easy. I just wish I could get her out of the Grey's lives for good. _But how?_

"Ms. Steele?"

I quickly turn around, when I hear an eerily quiet unknown feminine voice call my name from behind me in the empty parking garage, before I can type a message to Christian.

Standing a few feet from me is a brunette woman that I've not seen before.

 _Who is she? How does she know my name? How did she know I would be here at Christian's apartment? Does she work for him? Does she live here? How else would she be in the secure parking garage of the exclusive Escala apartments? You need a code to even get in here._ So many unanswered, unasked questions.

"Yes?"

"Anastasia Steele?" She checks to be sure, mispronouncing my first name, but it's close enough to where I know she's asking about me.

"Yes." I confirm. "May I help you?"

"No."

 _No?_

"Okay?" This is a little weird for me. "Well, I'm going to go now."

I start to slowly make my way to the elevator without taking my eyes away from the woman, but as I make the subtle movement, she steps closer to me. I can see her more clearly this close up. She has strikingly similar features... with me.

"You look like me." I observe aloud.

I thought Stephanie and I looked similar but this girl is even more so, excluding her bourbon colored eyes, and her hair is a bit darker than mine. Other than that, the resemblance is uncanny. It's like she's almost a carbon copy, and it's extremely freaking me out.

"Master likes obedient ones that look like you and me. Master is dark."

As soon as she said the word Master, I knew. She's a previous Submissive of Christian's.

I've met Stephanie, and I now consider her a friend, but this lady doesn't look very friendly and the vibe I'm getting off of her is threatening. I'm immediately on high alert. Alarm bells are going off like crazy in my head.

' _Master likes obedient ones that look like you and me.'_ And Stephanie.

He likes women that look similar. Brown hair, pale skin, petite, submissive women. That's why he's attracted to me. I'm not special. Maybe that's why he wont say he loves me. I'm just another notch in his doppelganger Submissive special bedpost.

No. He _loves_ me. He does. I know he does. Even if he wont admit it to me or himself, I know he does.

"What do you have that I don't?" The mystery Sub continues.

"What do you mean?" I ask confused. Does she mean appearances, because that should be obvious.

"Master..." _Oh, I have him._ "Master is happy, I have seen him. He laughs and smiles. These reactions are rare... very rare for him."

"Um..." I don't know what to say about that. I don't know how he acted with his previous Subs, only from what Stephanie has told me, and she just said he didn't show emotions or give them _more_. He gives me more. _Why me?_ Apparently this mysterious Sub and I have the same unanswered question. _What do I have that they don't?_

"Mistress says he gives you more." The mystery Sub continues. _Mistress? Who is...? That Bitch!_ "She said you're allowed to call him by his given name. That you sleep in his bed. That you make love during the week, not just weekends. And you're here, on a Monday."

 _Fucking Elena Lincoln! Let's be friends my ass!_ I guess she meant it when she said she wanted to be my friend since this is how she treats her friends; manipulates them, stabs them in the back, fucks their children, tries to scare them off by sending ex-Subs to confront them. I'd hate to be that woman's nemesis, but I guess, technically, I am.

"You're his girlfriend." She continues, sounding accusingly. "I wanted more. I've asked him for it before, and he wouldn't give it to me. Instead he ended our beautiful relationship. Mistress said if I got rid of you, Master will want me back and will give me more."

My eyes widen and I stand stock still with fear, when she pulls a gun from the pocket of her trench coat, and steps closer to me.

Her intentions are clear; _'If I get rid of you'_ , She's going to kill me.

I'm frozen. I can't move. I can't breath. I can't think.

Then she fires.

I squeal with a jump, thinking it's hit me, but I feel no pain. She's a horrible shooter and missed me completely.

My brain finally decides to function, fight or flight has kicked in, and since she has a gun in a fist fight, I decide it's flight and take off running, hiding behind cars.

I squeal again when I hear another shot. Any other time I would curse my two left feet, but today I am thankful they have failed me when I fall just missing being hit.

I quickly get up and run again, dodging between cars to hide from her.

It's difficult to run in heels. And the heels I decided to wear today, thanks to Kate who helped pick my outfit after she discovered my designer clothes that Christian bought for me, they are ankle strapped heels that I need to unbuckle in order to take them off. I obviously don't have time to do that.

I continue to hide behind cars as I make my way to the exit so I can be out in the public, hoping that will stop her from trying to kill me, since we'll have witnesses.

Just as I make it to the exit door, I hear another shot and a yelp of pain. I hope that was her and not some innocent unfortunate bystander.

Instead of running around the city in heels, trying to get away from this psycho bitch with a gun, I plan to run inside Escala's main lobby to go up to Christian's secure apartment and call him and the police from up there, but as soon as I come out of the door of the parking garage, I run into a familiar face.

* * *

 **CPOV**

 _~MONDAY EARLY AFTERNOON~_

I don't bother stopping, continuing to walk towards Garrett's office.

I try to open the door but it's locked so without a second thought, I kick it in.

When I get the door open, I'm about to have a heart attack at what I see.

Red; that's what I see.

And the back of Anastasia's head.

She's naked on her knees with her hands restrained behind her back in front of Garrett as he sits behind his desk in full Dom mode.

 _I've been worried sick and she's over here sucking Garrett off?!_

"WHAT THE FUCK?!"

"Grey?!" The fucker shouts when he notices me, no doubt hearing the wood splinter from the door being broken.

He quickly stands, simultaneously zipping his pants and trying to cover Anastasia's naked body with a leather jacket.

Anastasia screams when I throw a hard punch at Garrett, knocking him off his feet. He falls back, bringing his chair with him and landing on his ass.

"Oh my god!" She shouts in a higher than usual pitched voice when I make a start to go after him. "Mr. Grey!"

 _What?_

I stop, confused, as it's not Anastasia's voice I hear.

"Fuck." I breathe when I turn around to face the girl.

It's not Anastasia, it's Stephanie, trying to hide her naked body with only Garrett's jacket on as best as she can with her restrained hands.

"WHAT THE FUCK, GREY?!" Garrett shouts, getting to his feet, looking like he's ready to come at me.

"I thought she was Ana." I inexcusably explain.

I'm standing between them, like I'm trying to keep them apart, but that was because I thought she was Anastasia.

I move out of the way, and Stephanie quickly pads over to Garrett. He releases her restraints and hands her a dress. Standing behind Garrett, to block my view, she quickly gets her dress back on then stands next to him. They are both staring at me, waiting for an explanation.

"I apologize." Is the only thing I can say.

"You really need to cool that temper of yours, Grey. Anger management classes will help with that." Garrett rightfully growls at me. I'd be fucking pissed if this was the other way around. "This is the second time you've overreacted because you thought Anastasia and I were together. She's not a cheater, Grey, and neither am I. You're supposed to trust your partner. If you don't, what does that say about your relationship?"

I really feel like shit now. I have nothing to say that can excuse how I reacted both occasions that I've physically attacked him for no other reason than being jealous. I've been wanting to hit him for some time now, but only for him having had her, and I let that and my jealously cloud my judgment. All I can do is stand here, like a fool, and run my hand through my hair.

"Where is she?" Garrett asks. "Maybe she can talk some sense into you."

"She's missing," I tell them. "Anastasia's missing."

"What?!" Stephanie shrieks.

"What do you mean, missing?" Garrett asks, our brawl now forgotten.

"I mean, I can't find her. I haven't been able to get ahold of her all day. Someone said they saw her with you."

"Yeah, I picked her up from _Grey House_ this morning." I try not to be upset hearing this, but I can't help the scowl now on my face as he continues. "She said she was done working for the day and needed a ride. I gave her a lift to her apartment where she got in her car and drove off. I picked Stephanie up after I dropped Anastasia off, and we came back here. I had some paperwork to get done that I didn't finish. I haven't see Anastasia since this morning."

"Did you take her anywhere else?"

"No. I drove her straight to her apartment, dropped her off, and left after I saw her drive away."

"Her car is at my place." I think aloud. "They said she ran into you after that."

"Not me, I haven't seen her since then. I was with Stephanie. Picked her up right after dropping Anastasia off this morning."

Stephanie nods in agreement, looking too worried to respond verbally.

"Do you know where she might be?" I ask him since he's at least heard from her today. "She doesn't have her cell, and she may be hurt."

"Hurt?"

"Someone..." I swallow hard before continuing. "She may have been shot."

Stephanie gasps, covering her mouth.

"Steph, honey, I have to help Grey find Ana."

She nods frantically, understanding, and accepts his car keys that he hands to her.

"Go back to my place, I'll be there later."

"Okay." She whispers.

He gives her a quick hard kiss then turns to face me.

"Let's go, Grey. We'll take your car."

"Where the fuck are we going?" I ask but follow him out.

"We need to figure out where Anastasia is. Tell me everything that's happened."

 _Where the fuck do I start?_

I begin to explain some of what's happened as we stand next to my R8.

"One of my ex's was jealous of Anastasia. They thought if they got rid of her, they would have me again. She involved another ex of mine to... To kill Anastasia." _Fuck that was hard to say_. "They said Anastasia got away, and left with a man."

"How do you know?" He asks me. "If they told you that, they could be lying."

"Both of my ex's have been detained and are in police custody. They don't have her and I haven't heard from her yet."

"And they told you they saw her leave with me?"

"Not you." I correct him. "'A love sick boy.'"

"Really, Grey?"

"She's your ex." I shrug. "You want her."

"Wanted." He corrects me. "I may have wanted her back when you first got together because we literally just broke up, but I never went out of my way to be with her or tried to get her to leave you."

I laugh, because that's fucking hilarious; him being able to take her from me.

"Listen, Ana's a really sweet girl. She's great. Everything you would want in a lover. You're a very lucky guy to have her, I should know."

"That I am." There is plenty of distain in my tone, a warning for him not to continue praising my girlfriend's qualities.

"But I'm with Steph now," He continues. "Anastasia hooked us up, and I love Stephanie."

"You didn't love Anastasia?" I counter unbelieving. He's fucking one of my ex-Subs. Her features are identical to Anastasia's.

"I did." _Fucker!_ "But I wasn't _in love_ with her. I know that now."

I huff not believing him.

"Look, I know you don't like me, and quite frankly I don't really give a shit about you either. But I do care about Anastasia. As a friend." He stresses the word friend. "This is the most we've ever conversed and we're already arguing. It needs to stop. We're going to have to set aside our differences to find her."

"Fair point well made."

"Alright. So they said she left with a love sick... Wait." He instantly becomes furious and growls a name. "José. Fucking. Rodríguez."

"Who?" I've never met the guy, but his name sounds familiar.

"He is Anastasia's college friend. That fucker has it bad for her. He's the one that tried to kiss her that night at the club when you thought I was trying to take her home."

I remember that. Never saw this Rodríguez character, though.

"He's had a hard-on for Anastasia since day fucking one, even though she's never given any indication that she liked him more than a friend." He continues. "Every time I was over her place, and he showed up, that fucker would look like someone shot his puppy. If anyone can be labeled as a love sick boy, it's that fucker."

"She knew him longer than you." I say aloud.

"Yeah."

Why wouldn't she have sex with this Rodríguez character then? She told me she only had sex with Garrett to lose her virginity. Maybe so she didn't lead him on, like Garrett just said, wanting to keep him as just a friend.

"But he lives in Portland." Garrett brings me from my thoughts. "He would of had to come to Seattle just to do this. I don't see that happening. Besides, the events of today, involving your exes, have been spontaneous. He wouldn't of known about your ex's plot. Where was the last place she was seen?"

"My apartment's parking garage."

"Yeah, he wouldn't know she was there. He would have went to _Grey House_ or her apartment, not yours. "

 _Maybe he did_.

"Last night, someone was in her apartment. Apparently a picture had been misplaced, the girls believe someone took it."

"That's all they took was a photo?" He asks confused. "Why would someone break in just to steal a photo? Maybe it was just misplaced, like you said."

"We were at her apartment to drop something off. When she took too long, I went up to check on her. Someone buzzed me up and when I entered the apartment Anastasia and Katherine were in the bedroom and neither buzzed me up." I explain. "The missing photo, along with me getting buzzed up, led us to believe someone was in their apartment so they both stayed with me last night."

"Why the fuck would whoever broke in let you, a man no less, up to the apartment. If they wanted to do something to the girls, they had the perfect opportunity to do something and could have done it then and there."

"I've been wondering the same thing." And worried myself sick thinking about it. "But if it was this José guy, he could have over heard us talking about staying with me. He could have followed us to my apartment last night, or followed Anastasia from _Grey House_ today." I would ask Sawyer if he's noticed any suspicious men following her, but we've been in Georgia all week and only returned last night, and if there was anything suspicious, Sawyer would have notified me or Taylor straightaway.

"Yeah. But José is harmless, and she's still missing. If she was with him, why wouldn't she call you? She could use his phone, and she would have turned up by now."

"Because I fucked up." I mutter, thinking Anastasia doesn't want to be with me anymore.

I didn't say I loved her last night and now she has to know I'm a sadist with what Leila said to her.

"What do you mean?"

"Nothing. Let's find out." I pull my phone out and make a call to my head of security.

 _"Welch."_ He answers on the first ring.

"I need you to track a phone, and run a background check. José Rodríguez."

 _"I'll get right on it, sir."_

I end the call without any further exchanges.

"Just like that?" Garrett asks.

"Just like that." I confirm. "If he has her, I don't think he'll turn his phone off since nobody would know he took her. Or at least, he thinks nobody would know. We can track him and confront him. If he doesn't have her, perhaps he will know something."

 _ **~..~..~**_

It doesn't take long for Welch to send me the background check and phone location of José Rodríguez.

Other than an incident with recreational drugs, his background check came back clean, but all fucker's start off clean. We're not born with shit on our background checks, it accumulates over time. For fuck's sake, even Elena's background check is squeaky clean and she had sex with a minor.

His phone confirms José Rodríguez was in Seattle near Escala at the time of the shooting. His phone shows he is currently somewhere between Seattle and Portland, and his phone hasn't moved for about an hour.

Garrett and I are on our way to where Rodríguez is to find out if he's seen Anastasia or knows anything about her whereabouts.

 _Why does this feel like the start of a really bad joke? Two Dominants alone in a car on their way to rescue a Submissive..._

We pull up to the location I tracked Anastasia's phone before when Garrett left her stranded.

I glare at the fucker, Garett, and get out to look around.

We're alone on the deserted road. Nothing's here, just a two lane road in the middle of no-fucking-where with trees, bushes, plenty of vegetation surrounding the area, only one side off of the road is accessible on foot, but no signs of Anastasia or Rodríguez.

I still can't believe this fucker left Anastasia here that night.

"What?" The fucker asks clueless, wondering why I'm giving him the death glare.

"You." I accuse him.

"What about me?"

"Why would you leave Anastasia here?"

"Not this shit again." He complains. "I came right back!"

"Something could have happened to her!"

"Nothing did, because I. Came. Right. Back. I just needed to cool off after we got into an argument. I was trying to reconcile with her and she was busy sexting this guy online. I needed space, she need space, so I left her alone, drove around the block, and came _right back_. I wouldn't leave her like that. I'm not a complete asshole, unlike the guy she was chatting with."

 _Did he just call me an asshole?_

I raise my brow in response.

"Fuck." He groans. "It was you, wasn't it?"

"You go that way," I say, ignoring him because we need to focus on finding Anastasia, not arguing. "I'll go this way."

We walk into a wooden trail area together, and go our separate ways, hoping to find something, anything.

It's summer so it's full of thick greenery and it's hard to see through. I start pushing branches and ferns out of my way so I can walk through the brush, even stepping over logs. I'm doing all this shit in my Armani suit and I don't give a fuck as long as I find my girl. I don't see anything related to Anastasia or any other person being here.

"Ana?!" I hear Garrett shout.

"Did you find her?!" My heart is beating so fast as I quickly make my way towards Garrett.

When I reach him he's found a small clearing.

"NO!" He shouts, but lowers his voice when he sees me. "I'm just calling her name, hoping she'll hear me."

"Fucker! I thought you found her."

"If I find her, I'll say I found her, dipshit!"

"Shut the fuck up and keep looking."

As I turn around to go back on my side, something on the ground catches my eye.

A phone.

How I found this small phone in such a wide open wooded area is beyond me.

I crouch down, get out my handkerchief, and pick up the phone using the fabric. It's an old flip phone so I open it. It's on, but that's not what surprises me. Starring back at me, on the screen, is my beautiful blue eyed girl, beaming, carefree and happy. It looks as if she's laughing at something amusing.

I give the image a small smile as I run my finger along the screen.

"Ana." I whisper to myself.

My eyes feel wet, and I realize I'm crying. I don't even remember the last time I cried.

"Grey." I hear Garrett from behind me, so I quickly wipe my eyes and turn around to look at him, still crouched down on the ground.

He's standing next to me, looking at the ground and nods towards something, so I turn around to look in that direction.

"No." I quickly stand.

What I see drains me of my blood, and stops my frantic heart from beating completely, with fear.

At this point, I'm no longer breathing.

The ground is disturbed as if there has been a scuffle, and there is blood.

 _Fuck! She's hurt._ _Is this from when she was shot, if she was? Or is this recent?_

I'm praying like crazy that this is blood from an animal and not my girlfriend.

"I'm worried, Grey." It's like he's moving further away from me, I can barely hear anything, but in reality he's right next to me.

"Me, too." I admit as I look around the wooded area for any other signs.

"I don't think it's José that has her. He's obsessed with her, he wouldn't hurt her."


	28. (28) He Has Her

**APOV**

 _~MONDAY MORNING~_

"Mistress said if I got rid of you," The mysterious ex-Submissive of Christian's says. "Master will want me back and will give me more."

My eyes widen and I stand stock still with fear, when she pulls a gun from the pocket of her trench coat, and steps closer to me.

Her intentions are clear; _'If I get rid of you'_ , She's going to kill me.

I'm frozen. I can't move. I can't breath. I can't think.

Then she fires.

I squeal with a jump, thinking it's hit me, but I feel no pain. She's a horrible shooter and missed me completely.

My brain finally decides to function, fight or flight has kicked in, and since she has a gun in a fist fight, I decide it's flight and take off running, hiding behind cars.

I squeal again when I hear another shot. Any other time I would curse my two left feet, but today I am thankful they have failed me when I fall just missing being hit.

I quickly get up and run again, dodging between cars to hide from her.

It's difficult to run in heels. And the heels I decided to wear today, thanks to Kate who helped pick my outfit after she discovered my designer clothes that Christian bought for me, they are ankle strapped heels that I need to unbuckle in order to take them off. I obviously don't have time to do that.

I continue to hide behind cars as I make my way to the exit so I can be out in the public, hoping that will stop her from trying to kill me, since we'll have witnesses.

Just as I make it to the exit door, I hear another shot and a yelp of pain. I hope that was her and not some innocent unfortunate bystander.

Instead of running around the city in heels, trying to get away from this psycho bitch with a gun, I plan to run inside Escala's main lobby to go up to Christian's secure apartment and call him and the police from up there, but as soon as I come out of the door of the parking garage, I run into a familiar face.

"José!" I don't even question why he's here, I just run to him.

"Hey, Ana." He beams at me, but his smile fades when he sees my fear.

"Do you have your car with you?" I ask him in a panic.

Instead of going up to the apartment, like I planned, I'll just get a ride from José and go straight to Christian. It's a split second decision I hope I don't regret later.

"Yeah. Why?"

I squeal when I hear the parking garage door open.

I don't bother looking, thinking it's the crazy ex-Sub. My first instinct is to just get the hell away from her and that is exactly what I do.

"Run!" I shout at José, and grab his hand.

Together we take off running through the crowded sidewalk without looking behind us.

He's basically leading, pulling me, since I can't really run in heels. I'm thankful, but I really need to take these damn things off.

 _I swear, after today, I will never wear heels again._

José leads us down an empty alleyway where we hide. We lean against a building trying to catch our breathing.

"What's going on?" José pants.

I just shake my head, trying to catch my breath.

"Can I use your phone?" I ask, ignoring his question. "I need to call Christian."

"Oh, sorry. I broke it yesterday and I haven't replaced it yet."

 _Shit!_

"Are you cold?" He asks me.

I'm shaking so badly, but from the adrenaline running through my veins, not the weather as he seems to believe.

Instead of answering him, I just nod to confirm.

"Here." He takes off his black jacket, and puts it on me.

 _I need Christian_.

"I need to get to _Grey House_." I say out loud.

"You want to go to work?" He asks confused.

I got away from the crazy lady, but I can't go back to Escala, not even to get my car, so I'll need José to drive me.

"Where's your car?" I ignore his questioning again.

"Just a couple blocks down."

"Can you give me a ride?"

"Yeah, sure."

I frown when he grins, but then he doesn't realize what I've just been through. All he knows is I told him to run and asked for a ride.

We wait a few minutes to make sure it's all clear then slowly make our way out of the alley.

We walk briskly towards wherever José's car is parked, with me looking over my shoulder every few seconds and suspiciously at every brunette on the street. Even if it's not that psycho bitch, it could be another one. Stephanie said there is a Sub-Club and Elena is basically their leader.

I'm grateful when José holds my hand to comfort me because I'm seriously freaking out. She tried to kill me for goodness sake.

When we arrive at his car, a block away from Escala, he opens the passenger door for me.

I'm still shaking like crazy from my adrenaline.

After I'm inside, and have my seat belt on, José walks around and gets in to drive.

I put my hands inside the pockets of José's jacket that I'm wearing, to pull his jacket tighter around me. I feel something inside the pocket that feels like a lanyard with a plastic card attached. I take it out and begin absentmindedly running my fingers through the lanyard without looking at it, to give myself something to do while I wait for José to drive me to Christian.

"José, _Grey House_ is that way." I point in the direction of _Grey House_ when he makes a wrong turn.

"Oh, sorry. I'm new to the city, I'll have to turn around."

"What are you doing in Seattle, anyway?" I ask not only because I'm curious, but to make conversation to calm me down. My heart still feels as if it's going to beat out of my chest, and it doesn't seem to be letting up any time soon.

"I came to see you." He beams like it should be obvious.

"How did you know I would be home?" _I wasn't home_. "How did you know I was at Christian's?" My voice is slightly higher than when I asked my first question.

"Kate told me." He explains, driving a little faster now. _Thank fuck, because I need Christian_.

I look around almost frantically when he takes another wrong turn.

"José," Before I can say anything more, the lanyard accidently falls from my hand onto the floor so I bend down to pick it up.

"Holy fuck." I breathe when I read _GEH SECURITY_ on the ID badge of a _Grey House_ security member. I remember last night when Christian and I were trying to have sex and he kept getting bombarded with phone calls. One of those calls was about a missing GEH security ID badge. Christian even had to go into work early today to deal with it.

Just when I thought my heart couldn't beat any faster, it picks up only to drop out of my stomach completely.

I reach down with a shaky hand, and pick up the ID. I slowly turn it over and read the name on the front that doesn't belong to my friend, but the photo sure does.

"Stop the car." I murmur sitting upright in my seat.

"What?"

"I said, stop the car." I demand louder and more assertive than before, but trying not to give it away that something is wrong.

"Why? I thought I was taking you to work?"

"I'll walk from here. Pull over."

"Don't be ridiculous, Ana, I'll drive you."

"You're not even going in that direction, José!" I finally yell, freaking out when I see we're leaving the city. "Let me out!"

"Shit!" He groans when he sees that I have the ID in my hand.

Instead of waiting for him to stop, I open my door, planning to jump, I don't care at the moment, but he pulls over when I get the door open.

"Ana!" He shouts my name trying to stop me.

I quickly get out and cruse my heels for the hundredth time today when I try to run through the grass of a tree lined area instead of running on the cement street. My heels sink into the soft ground with each step I take, and since they are strapped on, I can't very well slip them off. I should have took them off in his car before I jumped out, but I wasn't thinking. The only thing I was thinking was I had to get away.

Regardless, I try to run as fast as my heels will allow, hoping I can hide from him somewhere in these woods.

I don't get very far when José grabs me, easily picking me up from behind.

"Let me go!" I scream.

My father taught me some self defense so I jab my elbow into his ribs and hit him with the back of my head.

This gets me released, only I fall to the ground.

I quickly turn over on my back and when he comes for me again, I put my heels to good use for once today and kick him, stabbing him in his thigh with my stiletto.

"AAAAAHH! FUCK!"

 _I swear, after today, I will always wear heels. Just not strapped on ones._

I try to get away again, but he falls on top of me, turns me so I'm laying on my back, and straddles me.

I hit him everywhere I can reach him with my fists when he rips my skirt.

I'm trying desperately to get my legs out from underneath him, but he's too heavy for me to move.

He grabs hands, stopping me from hitting him, and ties the piece he ripped from my skirt around my wrists. I try to buck him off now, but try as I might, he is much too strong for me so I settle for screaming for help at the top of my lungs while I continue to try and get him off of me.

"HELP!"

"Ana-"

"HELP!"

"Stop yelling, someone will hear you."

"That's the point! SOMEBODY HELP ME!"

"Be quiet."

"HELP!"

"Shut up!"

 _smack_

I stop moving and screaming when he slaps me so hard across my face that I see a flash of white.

I hear another rip and feel my skirt being torn again.

In a daze from being slapped, I look at him. He's tying the fabric from my skirt to his thigh that wont stop bleeding, using it as a bandage.

I scream again and try once more to get away from him when I see him reach for my lace panties thinking he may rape me, but he stops and lays flat on top of me, covering my mouth with one of his hands and holding my tied hands above my head with his other.

"I would say I wont hurt you, but it seems you enjoy it."

 _What?!_

"You like being tied up, don't you."

He keeps his hand over my mouth so I can't speak, but even if I could, I don't know what I would say to that.

"I want you, Ana." His husky voice makes me want to vomit. "I've wanted you since the first time I saw you four years ago."

I shake my head and blink the tears from my eyes.

"Yes." He nods his head. "I've dreamed of being with you."

 _OH MY GOD!_

I try to pull away from him when he leans down, not knowing what he's going to do. He just runs his nose along my neck, inhaling deeply.

"Mmmmm, you smell so good." He moans in my ear.

I whimper from behind his hand when I feel him harden.

 _Please!_ I internally beg.

"I know now why you wouldn't give me a chance." He nuzzles his nose in my hair, inhaling again, as I try to pull away from him. "It's because I'm a nice guy."

I make a disbelieving noise behind his hand.

 _Nice?! Is this nice?!_

"I know, Ana." He finally pulls his face away from mine and grins at me like he knows a secret.

 _He knows what, exactly?_

"I know you like it rough."

My eyes widen at his statement, thinking the worst, and when his hand slips enough for me to wrap my teeth around him, I do just that, and bite him hard.

"Aaah!" He sits up, releasing me to hold his injured hand, but still straddling me.

"Get off of me!" I growl, trying to buck and push him off, but he doesn't budge.

"Ana, I'm only giving you what you want." He tries to reason with me.

"I don't want you!" I cry.

"You'll change your mind." He sounds so sure. "Let's get you out of the dirt. Pretty girls don't belong in the dirt."

I hold my breath when he reaches for my panties again, but he bypasses them and rips the rest of my skirt from my body then stuffs the remaining fabric into his pants pocket.

Finally he gets off of me, but grabs my feet before I'm able to do anything. I try to get my feet released, but he holds me tight and takes off my heels, tossing them into a bush.

He grabs me, lifting me up and over his shoulder, and hobbles as he carries me to his car.

I feel completely exposed, only wearing my work shirt and José's jacket with my lace panties on full display. And of course today I wore stockings with a garter belt to please Christian. I can see how dirty my hair is from me being on the ground when it falls down in front of my vision.

I scowl at José when he puts me inside his car.

"Don't touch me!" I grit out between my teeth when he takes much too long to fasten my safety belt and brushing his hand against my thighs.

"Relax." He warns me, shutting the door.

As soon as the door is shut, I reach up with my tied hands and lock the car as he limps around to the driver's side.

I hear a click and José opens his door.

"Nice try." He holds up his key fob.

I would try to get out of the car again, but I know I wont get very far so I lunge at him, hitting him in his face with my fits closed together.

I manage to hit him twice before he stops me.

"That's enough!" He shouts, holding my wrists. "I thought you enjoyed receiving pain, not giving it."

"What?" I say out loud.

"You're a Submissive, aren't you?"

"What?!" My eyes widen and my eyebrows raise to my hairline.

 _How does he know?!_

"I read that paperwork in your apartment." He answers my unasked question, reaching in the back seat for a black bag and hands my the contract that Christian gave me. It doesn't have anything on it saying it's from Christian and the NDA is no longer with it since Christian and I are together and he said I could destroy it, but I kept the contract because we still plan to play.

"See?"

"You're the one who broke into my apartment?!"

"I didn't break in."

"Then how did you get this?!" I shout holding up the paperwork.

"I had a key."

"How?!"

Neither Kate nor I gave him a key.

"The day you moved in, when Chad and I helped you and Kate. I went to grab lunch for everyone. I took your car, remember, and that's when I copied the key." He shrugs like it's no big deal, taking the contract back and putting it inside the bag and tossing it into the back where he got it.

"So you were in our apartment last night? You let Christian in?"

"Yeah." He seems upset. "That was a slip-up on my part. The buzzer went off so I tried to silence it before you or Kate heard and came into the living room and saw me, but I accidently hit the button to allow him access."

"José," I shake my head, not understanding. "Why are you doing this?"

"I told you." He reaches over to me, tucking some of my hair behind my ear, but I pull away from him so he can't reach me. "I want you, Ana."

"Well, I don't want you. Take me home."

"No. I've waited years for you to give me a chance."

"I'm never going to be with you! You're no longer my friend!"

"I don't want to be your friend. I want to be your lover."

"I will never love you." I cry.

"You'll learn to. People do it everyday."

"Are you going to rape me?" I express my fear.

"I would never do that. I want you to want me."

I breath a little in relief.

"You tried to kiss me, take advantage of me when I was drunk that night we all went out." I counter. "Who knows what you would have done if Chad hadn't of stopped you."

"Don't over exaggerate. It was just a kiss. I just thought if I kissed you, you'd see, or feel something. You forgave me easily enough."

"I didn't forgive you. This is the first time we've talked since then."

"Yeah, and you didn't bring it up. You obviously forgave me."

"Ugh!" _I didn't bring it up because I'm not going to have a conversation with him on the sidewalk with a crazy lady chasing me with a gun!_

"Don't worry, I won't force myself on you. I told you... I want you to want me."

"Please, José." I beg him. "Just let me go."

"No." He starts his car, and pulls out onto the road. "Now behave while I drive or I'll be forced to use the chloroform on you."

 _Chloroform?!_

The GEH security badge, the chloroform, breaking into my apartment, him being where I was at Escala.

He planned on kidnapping me, and what's worse, he doesn't want ransom, he wants me.

 _Oh my god! What am I going to do?!_

 _~MONDAY EARLY AFTERNOON~_

It feels like we've been driving forever. José keeps glancing at me and smiling.

I continuously pull the jacket around me to cover my body from his view since my shirt is too short to cover anything but my top half.

 _Why did he have to rip my skirt? He could have used his shirt_.

I see him pull out the extra material of my skirt from his pocket and hold it on his thigh where I kicked him with my heel.

He hisses through his teeth in pain when he applies pressure.

"Does it hurt?" I spit with hatred clear in my tone. "I hope it fucking hurts! I hope I severed your artery."

 _Or at least got his dick._

But I know I didn't get him as deep as I wanted or tried to. It's probably just a scratch instead of a puncture like I was aiming for.

"I'll be fine." He says like I actually care about him. "Don't you worry."

"I'm more worried about my Jimmy Choo's."

They were expensive and I know Christian wont care, but I care more about the ruined heels than José's injured leg.

"Your what?" He asked confused as to what I'm talking about since he doesn't know designers.

"My heels."

"Don't fret. I'll buy you a new pair."

"You couldn't afford it! Christian paid well over $800 for those heels." I know because they still had the price tag on them when Kate picked them out this morning, but what's worse, is they weren't the most expensive heels in the closet. That's just crazy.

"$800?!" He shouts the ridiculously high price of the designer shoes. "We'll get you some for 30 bucks at Target. Hell, we'll splurge and get you a few pair."

"They're designer." I argue, narrowing my eyes at him.

"They sound like someone sneezed, and you sound like a stuck-up rich bitch. Store brand heels do just as good of a job than designer heels."

"Designer brands are better quality."

"You're not the Ana I remember." He chuckles. "The Ana I remember didn't care about designer brands."

"You're right, I'm not the Ana you remember. I'm more high maintenance now." I lie. "You can't afford to keep me happy. I even own high end salons and a house in Bellevue now, so you better take me back."

"A house where?" He perks up.

 _Shit!_

"Kate's there." I say so he wont take me where nobody knows of, but I don't even know where he's taking me now.

"Kate's at work." He smirks, knowing I'm lying.

 _Double Shit!_

"Well, she gets off early today and she'll be there soon. We've moved in after you broke into our apartment last night." I continue to lie, and it doesn't matter if he knows of the house at this point because I told Christian I would stay with him.

"You stayed with that guy." He accuses me.

"What guy? Christian?"

"Yeah, him. And you owning salons explains why you went there today and didn't get any beauty treatments done. How'd that come about anyway, you owning salons?"

"Oh my god, José, please tell me you were not stalking me." I don't know why I say this, when it's clear that he is.

"I prefer the term, watching over you."

"José, you're nuts! Seriously crazy!" _Why didn't I see this before?!_

"Seriously crazy about you." He says with a cheeky grin.

"Oh my god." I end up putting my face between my tied hands.

"Lighten up, Ana. It wont be so bad."

"What are you planning to do?" I look at him again.

"What do you mean?"

"What are you going to do to me?"

"Nothing."

"Then why wont you let me go?"

"I want you to love me." He says like it's a logical reason why he has me and wont let me go.

"So you're going to hold me captive until I fall for you?! José, that's not love."

"Yes it is." He argues. "I watched _Beauty and the Beast_ with my little cousins last weekend and Belle fell in love with the Beast after he forced her to stay with him. I'm not a monster, but if Disney can get away with it, I thought; why can't I."

"You cannot be serious, José, that is a fictional story! It's _not_ real!"

"Either way, no harm in trying."

"You'll go to jail." I tell him. "I'm not going to be one of those girls that tells her capture she wont go to the police. I'm telling you straight-out. I. _Will._ Go. To. The. Police!"

"Then I'll never let you go." He says simply, stopping at a stoplight now.

"Ugh!"

I bang the back of my head in frustration against the headrest of the seat, but sit up when I see people. I try to roll the window down so I can yell for help, but it wont work. He must have the windows locked. I reach for the door handle, but this time José grabs my tied hands, stopping me before I can open the door.

"Seriously, Ana, you need stop."

"I'll never stop." I pull my hands away from him as he drives again. "I'll never stop trying to get away from you!"

He sighs. "I wish you'd just give me a chance."

"Never." I growl.

"Anyway, we're here."

I didn't realize he had stopped driving.

He's parked us behind a building where nobody can see us, and I'm beginning to freak out more than I already am. Even more so than when we were in the woods on the side of the road.

"I want to show you something." He smiles at me as he unbuckles my seatbelt, then he gets out, limps to my side and opens my door.

"Don't touch me." I growl when he tries to help me out.

"I'm just trying to help you."

"You're just trying to cop a feel. I can help myself. If you really want to help, let me go."

"I told you, I wont let you go, so stop asking me to." He's now just as frustrated as I am.

I smile a little when I see the huge blood stain on his jean covered thigh as well as a rip in his pants from my heel, when I get out of his car.

"I've always wondered what your body looked like." He says in a creepy husky tone, his eyes glazed over as they linger on my body for far too long. I even notice a bulge in his jeans. _Ew!_

I try to pull his jacket that I'm wearing down as best as I can with my hands tied together to cover my lace covered ass, but it's worthless.

He's injured and I no longer have my heels on, so I make a run for it again since we're no longer in such a secluded area, but this time he's ready and grabs my hair, pulling me back to him before I can take two steps away.

"Ah!" I bring my tied hands up to my hair. "Let me go!"

"Are you going to behave and stop running from me?" He asks, gripping my hair tighter.

"Yes." I hiss.

"If you run again or scream, I'll be forced to sedate you." He warns me.

"Fine." I growl at him.

I don't know what the hell he'd do to me if I was unconscious so I need to cooperate.

I glare at him when he turns me around, but he's all smiles.

He grabs my tied hands, pulling me toward the entrance of the building.

"You're going to love this." He says when he gets the door unlocked. "I wanted you to see this weeks back but you never made it."

 _What is he talking about?_

He leads me down a corridor to a door at the end of the hall, then down a set of stairs leading us to a basement, all while holding my hands so I wont run again. With each step we take, I'm more reluctant to follow him, but he just pulls me along.

We finally stop in front of another door.

After he opens the door, he forces me inside first.

Since it's dark, with no windows and the lights off, the first thing I notice is the smell; wood polish with a faint citrus scent. It almost reminds me of seeing Christian's Playroom for the first time, but surely this is not a BDSM sex dungeon José is showing me, right? _Right?!_ He does have the BDSM contract now.

When he turns on the lights, my eyes widen as I stare blankly around the room, stupefied, the blood draining from my face.

* * *

 **CPOV**

 _~MONDAY EARLY AFTERNOON~_

It's summer so it's full of thick greenery and it's hard to see through. I start pushing branches and ferns out of my way so I can walk through the brush, even stepping over logs. I'm doing all this shit in my Armani suit and I don't give a fuck as long as I find my girl. I don't see anything related to Anastasia or any other person being here.

"Ana?!" I hear Garrett shout.

"Did you find her?!" My heart is beating so fast as I quickly make my way towards Garrett.

When I reach him he's found a small clearing.

"NO!" He shouts, but lowers his voice when he sees me. "I'm just calling her name, hoping she'll hear me."

"Fucker! I thought you found her."

"If I find her, I'll say I found her, dipshit!"

"Shut the fuck up and keep looking."

As I turn around to go back on my side, something on the ground catches my eye.

A phone.

How I found this small phone in such a wide open wooded area is beyond me.

I crouch down, get out my handkerchief, and pick up the phone using the fabric. It's an old flip phone so I open it. It's on, but that's not what surprises me. Starring back at me, on the screen, is my beautiful blue eyed girl, beaming, carefree and happy. It looks as if she's laughing at something amusing.

I give the image a small smile as I run my finger along the screen.

"Ana." I whisper to myself.

My eyes feel wet, and I realize I'm crying. I don't even remember the last time I cried.

"Grey." I hear Garrett from behind me, so I quickly wipe my eyes and turn around to look at him, still crouched down on the ground.

He's standing next to me, looking at the ground and nods towards something, so I turn around to look in that direction.

"No." I quickly stand.

What I see drains me of my blood, and stops my frantic heart from beating completely, with fear.

At this point, I'm no longer breathing.

The ground is disturbed as if there has been a scuffle, and there is blood.

 _Fuck! She's hurt._ _Is this from when she was shot, if she was? Or is this recent?_

I'm praying like crazy that this is blood from an animal and not my girlfriend.

"I'm worried, Grey." It's like he's moving further away from me, I can barely hear anything, but in reality he's right next to me.

"Me, too." I admit as I look around the wooded area for any other signs.

"I don't think it's José that has her. He's obsessed with her, he wouldn't hurt her."

"He has her." I confirm.

We tracked his phone here and I have said phone in my hand. I know it to be his because who else would have Anastasia as their screen saver. She must have tried to run or escape and the struggle caused his phone to slip out of his pocket.

"How do you know?"

I hand him the cell phone wrapped in my handkerchief as proof.

"Fuck." He breathes when he sees the screen.

I continue to look around the area we're in, but I don't see anything suspicious other than what's right in front of us; the bloody disturbed ground.

"I don't think it's her blood." I hear Garrett say.

"What makes you think that?" I ask.

When I look at him he's holding up a Jimmy Choo stiletto with his finger hooked inside the heel. I immediately recognize it as heels that I purchased for Anastasia. I feel a sense of pride when I see the dirty nude heel is covered in red. _She's fighting._

But she's not here, and I need to find her.

"Call the authorities." I tell him, handing him the detective's card that I received when I was at Esclava earlier.

"We're just going to wait here for the dickless police to say what we already know?"

"No." I make my way back to my R8. "We're going to find her."

We get in and I drive us toward Boeing Field. I need a flight plan so I call Taylor on my hands-free while I drive.

 _"Yes, Mr. Grey."_ He answers on the first ring.

"Any luck on your end?"

 _"I found out Ms. Williams gave the Escala security on duty a sexual favor in turn to accidently turn off the garage security cameras. What she didn't account for was our cameras covering the penthouse parking area that can only be accessed via the penthouse security suite. Ms. Williams has been arrested for the attempted murder of Ms. Steele, as well as the Escala security and Ms. Lincoln for being accomplices to her attempted murder. Ms. Williams confessed, that, along with our video footage, they'll be prosecuted."_

"I see."

So that's how she was able to do this and nobody noticed. _Fucking security_. Taylor does background checks on those fuckers.

 _"The access code has since been changed. We change the codes every so often, but Ms. Lincoln still had access. That's how Ms. Williams got in."_

"When I return I'll give you a new list of those allowed the access codes. Basically only family and Ms. Steele."

 _"Yes, sir. ... Forgive me for speaking out of turn, sir, but you may want to speak to your father. Ms. Lincoln may plan to use his services."_

"Noted."

 _"We.. haven't found Ms. Steele yet, sir."_ He lets me know cautiously.

"She's been taken." I tell him. "The police have been notified. I need a flight plan to Portland as soon as possible. I'm on my way to _Charlie Tango_ now."

 _"Yes, sir. Do you require assistance?"_

"I have company. Chadwick Garrett is with me. We'll be fine."

I end the call around the same time Garrett ends his phone call, presumably to the police.

"The police have been notified." He tells me. "I told them we suspect José Rodríguez has kidnapped and harmed Anastasia, and that we found his phone along with her bloody heels and where to find them. I didn't tell them we left the scene to kick his ass."

I nod and continue my driving.

"Where are we going?" He asks.

 _To kick his ass._

"Portland." I answer.

"To his house?"

I nod to confirm.

"You do know you're going to wrong way."

"I know." I grit out between my teeth, irritated. "We're flying down, it's faster, and it will save us a couple hours."

"Flying?"

"My helicopter."

Thank fuck he's quiet the rest of the drive.

As soon as we arrive at Boeing Field _Charlie Tango_ is set and ready to go. The dumb fuck actually thought we had to wait for a pilot, but I quickly shut him the fuck up when I lifted my helicopter in the air and fly the damn thing myself towards Portland.

"Ana and I were talking this morning." I hear his voice through my cans.

I clench my jaw but stay concentrating on my flying and getting to Anastasia, not the asshole sitting next to me.

"She didn't seem very happy." He continues when I stay quiet.

"I assure you, I'm fully capable of satisfying her." This is so annoying, making small talk with him. "She's extremely happy with me. She loves me."

"Do you love her?"

The permanent scowl on my face softens a bit as I recall our conversation last night.

"I do." I finally admit out loud and it's to this fucker.

He just nods.

"Did she..." _Fuck, I'm forced to talk to him about this shit._

I take one of hands off the control stick to run my fingers through my hair before I continue.

"Did she say she wasn't happy?"

"No, she said she was happy." _Fucker had me worried for nothing!_ "But she didn't _seem_ very happy."

"She's happy." I try to sound sure of it. "We just... see things differently."

"That's the exactly what she said. What do you see differently?"

"None of your fucking business!"

"Alright, gees, chill man, I was only trying to help."

"Well, I don't need your fucking help, now if you would kindly shut the fuck up until we get there."

It's finally quiet but it doesn't last long.

"Did she tell you?" The fucker just can't keep quiet, can he.

"Tell me what?" I decide to humor him.

"That she loves you?"

"Are you still in love with her?!" I shout.

"No." He says quickly. "I was just wondering."

"Forgive me when I call bullshit." He still has a hard-on for Anastasia, I know it.

"It's true." He insists. "I love Stephanie. She's amazing."

 _Do I tell him I've had her?_ No, he's had Anastasia. It wouldn't be wise to get into a fight while we're in the air.

"Yes." I admit after awhile of silence. "Anastasia has told me she loves me."

"Did you tell her you love her?"

"What the fuck are we, twelve?!"

"I'm just saying, for a girl in love, she didn't seem very happy. Does she know you love her?" He repeats his question.

I'm quite for what seems like an eternity and I can see Portland in the horizon.

"No." I'm quiet. "She doesn't know."

"Why not?"

"Garrett, just shut the fuck up and leave me the fuck alone." I grit out as I continue to fly _Charlie Tango_.

I'm seriously reconsidering why I've even brought him along right now.

Thank fuck it's quiet now. I'm not used to making such casual conversation with anyone, not even Elliot, and Garrett is being extremely intrusive.

"Grey."

I spoke, or rather thought, too soon.

"What now?!" I snap.

"I don't think you're a monster."

His words surprise me, and I end up dropping altitude a bit, but I quickly right myself and the helicopter before ATC asks what's going on.

"What the fuck did you just say?"

* * *

 **A/N:** ** _I'm not sure if CG & CG's conversation would be recorded since they are in air, but I'm going to pretend it's not, if it is._**


	29. (29) Monster

**APOV**

 _~EARLY AFTERNOON~_

"You're going to love this." He says when he gets the door of the building unlocked. "I wanted you to see this weeks back but you never made it."

 _What is he talking about?_

He leads me down a corridor to a door at the end of the hall, then down a set of stairs leading us to a basement, all while holding my hands so I wont run again. With each step we take, I'm more reluctant to follow him, but he just pulls me along.

We finally stop in front of another door.

After he opens the door, he forces me inside first.

Since it's dark, with no windows and the lights off, the first thing I notice is the smell; wood polish with a faint citrus scent. It almost reminds me of seeing Christian's Playroom for the first time, but surely this is not a BDSM sex dungeon José is showing me, right? _Right?!_ He does have the BDSM contract now.

When he turns on the lights, my eyes widen as I stare blankly around the room, stupefied, the blood draining from my face.

Photographs surround the room. Photographs everywhere. Photographs of me. Me.

Me: pouting, laughing, scowling, serious, amused. All in super close up; some in color, some in black and white.

 _Holy shit! He has a shrine dedicated to ME!_

I remember some of these. I remember José messing with the camera on a couple of occasions when he was visiting and when I'd been out with him as driver and photographer's assistant. He took snapshots claiming he was trying to get the camera to focus, or so I thought, not these invasive candid shots.

 _He had these displayed in his photography show?!_

"What do you think?" I hear José ask from behind me and a lock being clicked on the door, but I don't face him.

I'm still staring, transfixed, at each of the pictures in turn.

"Your reaction is everything I hoped it would be."

I finally look at José to see him limp towards the far corner of the room, then he pulls things out of his backpack and sets them on a freshly polished table lined with useless items and smaller photos of me. When he moves out of my view of whatever object he's placed on the table, I see it's _my_ photo. The one missing from my apartment with Kate, José, and I, only now it's just José and I, Kate nowhere to be found.

"Sorry, I took this, I didn't have a copy and when I saw it on your dresser, I just had to have it. You look so happy here."

"You're obsessed me." I state the obvious.

"Who wouldn't be." He says like it's only evident he should be.

 _How could I not see it?_

 _I've been his friend since I was 17, that's 4 1/2 years of this crazy obsession. I knew he liked me more than a friend, but how could I not see it?_

"What do you expect to happen here? You have to know this is wrong."

"We can get to know each other more."

"José, we've known each other for over 4 years. We already know a lot about each other; granted I didn't know you were some sort of psycho stalker with a crazy obsession with me, but we know each other nonetheless."

"That was as friends. I want us to get better acquainted as lovers."

"Oh my god! You're never going to listen, are you? What part of I don't want you, do you not understand? I. Do. _Not._ Want. You."

"But I want you." His voice that sick husky tone.

When he comes toward me, looking intently and as if he's going to touch me, I back up suddenly, hitting my back against the wall and knocking a photo of me down in the process. I don't have anything I can use to protect myself from him, with my heels gone and my hands tied together now.

"Relax, cariño." He picks up the photograph, leaning it against the wall.

He comes closer to me again, close enough for me to act, so I do. I bring my knee up and hit him as hard as I possibly can in his balls then push him over as he holds himself, groaning in pain.

I rush to the door and as suspected he did indeed lock it, but to my horror, you need a key to unlock it.

"FUCK!"

I quickly turn back to face him, trying to determine if I can get the key from him before he's recuperated from my blow. He's still on the ground holding himself, but he's coming down from the pain, and I still need the key. The key I wont be able to get.

"Fuck, Ana!" He sits up, holding his junk still in obvious pain. "I was only going to untie you."

 _How the fuck was I supposed to know that?!_

"Yes, untie me! Let me go."

I hold my hands out to him even though he's too far away to reach me.

"I told you to stop running from me." He growls, coming to a stand and limping towards me.

"I told you I would never stop trying to get away from you!"

"I warned you what I would do if you ran from me again. Do you want me to sedate you?" I can hear the warning in his tone, I have never heard him like this before, and I will admit he's starting to scare me, more so than he did earlier in the woods, if that's even possible.

"No, I don't want you to drug me so you can do unspeakable vile things to me while I'm unconscious." Defiance clear in my tone. "You're already doing terrifying things to me while I'm alert, I can only imagine the sort of fucked up shit you would do if I wasn't."

"Don't be ridiculous, Ana."

I'm surprised he unties me even after I keep trying to get away and constantly tell him I will never stop trying.

"You're the one being ridiculous." I pull my freed hands away from him and back up to put space between us while I try to think of another means of escape.

"I told you I wont hurt you, and I meant it."

"What do you expect me to think when you kidnap me, thinking you can force me to fall in love with you, ripping my clothes from my body, telling me you know I like it rough, holding me against my will in a basement, coming at me with a sick look in your eyes and a bulge in your pants. I'm tied up with no way to escape for goodness sake."

"We're going to be together forever." He says like that's an explanation for his actions. "I untied you, didn't I?"

"Just so you know, Christian's going to destroy you for doing this to me."

"I repeat; ridiculous. Or have you forgotten, no one knows you've been taken, no one knows you're with me, and no one can find us here. That's one reason I brought you here instead of my place. One because I've been staying with my dad for the summer, and two because I work here. I've been cleaning this place so they will display my works of art. It's basically closed until another show is scheduled and since I have the schedule, we'll be out of here before then."

"He'll find a way." I say quietly unsure. "He loves me."

"You don't sound so sure."

I probably don't look so sure either.

 _How in the world will Christian know José took me? He's never met him. What if he thinks I left him because he wouldn't express his love for me?_

"Let me show you how much he loves you."

"What are you talking about?"

He limps back to his table, getting a large manila envelope out of his bag and bringing it back to me.

"Here. I found this when I was in your apartment. Kate must have checked the mail because it was just sitting there. I opened it, but it _was_ sealed."

When I look at the envelope it's address to ANASTASIA STEELE with no return address, but I've never seen this before.

I take out the contents carefully, which seem to be backs of more photographs, so I turn them around. I try to stifle a sound but end up gasping.

* * *

 **CPOV**

 _~AFTERNOON~_

"Grey."

I spoke, or rather thought, too soon.

"What now?!" I snap.

"I don't think you're a monster."

His words surprise me and I end up dropping attitude, but I quickly right myself and the helicopter before ATC can ask what's going on.

"What the fuck did you just say?"

"Ana asked me if I thought I was a monster because I enjoy BDSM. I suspect you're a closet Dom?"

"You don't know what the fuck you're talking about."

"I do, actually. I'm sure you already know, I'm a BDSM Dominant." He says it like he's proud. I would never so openly announce that to anyone, but then I am thee Christian Grey and it would be all over the tabloids before I could blink.

"What the fuck does that have to do with me?"

"I've read about you, everyone has. To be honest, I thought you were gay until I saw the way you were looking at Anastasia that first day at _Grey House_. Then when I turned Dominant to warn you off, you stood up, just the same. I realize it could have been you being in CEO mode, as they both immense power, but it wasn't. It was Dominant vs. Dominant that day. What I don't understand is, why you're ashamed of the lifestyle."

"I'm not ashamed." I admit to the lifestyle without the safety of an NDA.

"Then why do you hide it?"

"I'm a highly influential person, well known in Seattle and in some parts of the world. If people knew what I enjoy, they wouldn't want to do business with me."

"So does that include your family?"

"Why the fuck would my family _need_ to know I'm a Dominant?" I ask, continuing to fly to Portland. "They don't need to know the fucked up kinky shit I'm into."

"You're right, they don't. But why do they think you're not into women? Why are you keeping your sexual preference away from your own family? They don't need to know how you like to fuck or even meet the women you fuck, but why are you keeping _everything_ from them?" He asks, then explains how he knows. "When you all came to my restaurant that night for your double date, your brother jokingly told me he finally got his brother to go on a date with a chick. He obviously thinks you're gay as well, just like the public, and he's your brother. If you have to hide it from your family, from everyone, you're ashamed."

"What would they think?" My family would disown me if they knew what I enjoy.

"I don't give a fuck what people think." I've said that before, and now I'm contradicting myself. "Neither should you. So what if they think you're a freak in the sheets. So what if they think you're a master at kink. What does your sex life have to do with business or family? You shouldn't feel you have to hide who you are from your family."

"You wouldn't understand." He only owns one restaurant, I own multiple businesses around the world. He's not adopted, he has a loving family that love him unconditionally, and his birthmother's not a crack-whore. We are total opposites. The only thing similar with us are our initials and that we're both BDSM Dominants.

"You're right, I don't. I don't understand why you close yourself off from everyone, including your own family. I don't understand why you wont tell Anastasia that you love her, when it's so obvious that you do. You told her you were a monster, didn't you? That's why she asked me, because you told her you were. You would only say that to push her away. Why would you push her away, want her to leave you, if you love her?"

"I don't want her to leave me." _She can't. It would cripple me._

"Exactly my point. You're lucky she's attracted to darkness. She brings this light to it and makes it look beautiful and better than it really is. Trash to treasure sort of thing. You've got a great girl, Grey, I would know. Don't let that go because you're afraid to love. As you see, we're not promised tomorrow so you have to live for today. When we find her, tell that girl you love her and don't waste a single second."

I should pay Garrett to be my therapist. This fucker's getting to me. All Flynn does is sit there and listens, forcing me to work shit out myself.

Is this what friends do? Not that I would ever consider a friendship with Garrett.

"I-" Might as well tell him, he's been giving me good advice, and I could use the help. Flynn's not here and even if he was, I swear, that fucker is useless. Expensive charlatan, he is.

"How can I be deserving of her love when I enjoy what I enjoy?" I ask him.

 _I can't make her happy, I've never done this hearts and flowers shit before, I'm going to screw it up like I already did._

"Who says you can't be happy? That you're incapable of love? It's your choice whether you close yourself off from love, but to me, it looks like Anastasia is thawing that cold heart of yours. If it's the BDSM lifestyle you're worried about, there's no 'normal', there's only 'consensual'. There are plenty of couples, married ones even, who enjoy the dark hardcore kinky lifestyle of BDSM. There's nothing wrong with that. What makes you think you don't deserve to be loved?"

"If my own mother didn't love me, how can anyone else?"

"Your mother?"

"My birthmother." I correct myself. "She was a neglectful crack-whore. She let her pimp abuse me."

"You were abused as a toddler?" He sounds more like Flynn asking instead of the usual shock and pity I usually receive when someone knows about my start to life. It's starting to feel more like a session than, dare I say it, friends.

I nod.

"How old were you?"

"I was with my birthmother from birth until I was about four years old. She died, committed suicide, and I was left alone with her body for 4 days until someone finally found us and called the authorities."

"I know this may sound harsh and unsympathetic, but that happened 24 years ago, man, you need to let that shit go. It's bottled up inside of you and you're letting it control your whole life. You have a new family that has loved you for years, 24 years. And now you have a wonderful girl that hangs on your every word, and you're going to blow it because your birthmother and her pimp did unspeakable things to you 24 years ago so you feel you're undeserving of love?"

This fucker is better than Flynn.

"How'd you get into BDSM, if I may ask?" He questions.

"My mother's friend seduced me when I was underage."

"I know they say you can't rape the willing, but underage, you couldn't give consent. BDSM is all about Safe, Sane, Consensual, you know that, so it was wrong of her to bring you into the lifestyle underage of consent. You're a Dominant, but I'm assuming you were her Submissive that young?"

I nod. "Until she trained me to be a Dominant."

"She abused you." He comments rather than asking.

"I realize that now, but at the time, I didn't."

"So now you get off by abusing women?" His question confuses me and takes me by surprise. It's not one I would expect from a Dominant in the lifestyle as he knows BDSM is not about abuse. "You realize you're caught in a cycle, don't you? There's a difference between abuse and BDSM."

"I know there's a difference. I don't abuse my Submissives."

"You may not see it that way, but you were abused as a toddler and again as a teenager. You had no control, and you were taught a fucked-up, unsafe, nonconsensual, unhealthy version of control. Now you continue the cycle of abuse by being the abuser, taking it out on unsuspecting Submissive women who unknowingly give consent to your abuse."

Everything he's saying is hitting me hard. I've never intentionally abused my Submissives, it was all consensual, but I do take the fucked up shit that happened to me out on them. That's why they all look so similar to my birthmother. And I'm realizing now, it _is_ abuse hiding behind BDSM and using that as an excuse to beat them, to get back at my birthmother for all the shit I went through and had no control over. This explains why it hurt me to punish Anastasia when she stayed out drinking after telling me she would go home. It wasn't controlled, it was controlling, and that's not our relationship.

"Don't take this the wrong way, Grey" He continues when I stay quiet. "But you need therapy. I could recommend someone if you'd like. He could probably help you with that temper of yours too."

"I've been in therapy since I was four years old. I have a therapist."

"Okay, so you've been in therapy since you were four. It could have helped you but then some woman you and your mother trusted interfered and molested you so you needed therapy again. Now you're, what, 28, and you're still in therapy? Why? 24 years of therapy and you're still fucked up, thinking you don't deserve love and all that shit. I get that therapy takes time, and doesn't fix problems overnight, but 24 years? You do know why therapy isn't working, don't you? You were probably defending your abusers and the actions of abuse, saying you deserved it, it was your fault, and all that typical bullshit. You have to want the help for it to work, otherwise it's pointless."

"Are you a therapist?" I accuse him.

He chuckles a bit. "My Uncle is. You should go to him. His name is Johnathon Flynn."

"Are you fucking kidding me?" I laugh loudly.

"No, why?"

"Flynn?"

"Maternal Uncle." He explains the surname difference. "He married my mother's younger sister, Rhain. He's pretty good."

"That's my therapist." I continue to laugh.

I can't believe Garrett is Flynn's nephew. I read Garrett's background check and saw his parents, Sunny and Richard Garrett, but I didn't know Sunny was Rhain's sister as Smith is such a common name, and that was Sunny and Rhain's maiden name. I don't have his parents background checks, just Garrett's, but his parents are listed on his background check. And I have Rhain's since she's Flynn's wife, but I never knew as I didn't go digging through extended family.

 _How fucking weird is this shit?! You can't make this shit up._

"Now I realize why you were laughing." He chuckles.

We both laugh it off a bit more, and I hate to admit it, but if I wasn't searching for my missing girlfriend, it might be fun to hang with him. Wow. I've never in my life 'hung out' or 'chilled out' with someone, not even my own fucking brother. It's depressing now that I think about it, looking back.

"Look, you love her. You know you do, she doesn't." He continues after we've calmed down from our laughing at the coincidence. "How does she know, how is she supposed to know, if you wont tell her? You can't treat her like a mind reader, Grey. She told me we, meaning her and I, wouldn't have worked out because I enjoy and get off on the hardcore BDSM and she doesn't. In order for me to be with her, I would have not been able to do what I enjoy with her. I would have had to of found a partner to practice my hardcore shit on. Is that something you can do? Talk to Ana and agree to a Poly relationship?"

"NO." That's the most outrageous thing I have ever heard.

"No need to get so offensive. I'm just trying to help you out. You need to talk to Anastasia about this. If you want to stay monogamous, and keep the hardcore BDSM, you're going to have to work something out. She told me, when I tried to reconcile with her, _'you don't want to be with someone who can't be what you need, because you'll never be happy'_ or some shit like that, and it's true."

I radio air traffic control since we're approaching our landing, and after I finish with them, I continue my conversation with Garrett.

"She's everything I need." She fully satisfies me. "She just deserves better." That's the problem. I don't deserve to be loved.

"That." He says when I land _Charlie Tango_ smoothly on the helipad in Portland. "That right there tells me she has the best man for her. You need to tell her you love her. She loves you, what are you waiting for?"

I never thought Garrett would be the one in my corner to cheer on my relationship with Anastasia.

"You do know she's not a Submissive." He comments.

I laugh once in agreement, knowing he's speaking of Anastasia's poor Submissive qualities.

* * *

 **APOV**

~AFTERNOON~

When I look at the envelope it's address to ANASTASIA STEELE with no return address, but I've never seen this before now.

I take out the contents carefully, which seem to be backs of more photographs. I turn them around and try to stifle a sound but end up gasping.

I thought it would be more photos of me, but staring back at me is brunette after brunette in Christian's Playroom, in very vulnerable positions. It doesn't surprise me because Chad had the same photos, what does surprise me is Submissive after Submissive look identical to each other, myself included. The last photo the most astounding; it's stuck to the back of another photo so I'm not sure if it was meant to be included but when I finally free it, it's a photo of a young Christian in a very vulnerable position.

"Why are you showing me this?"

"I just thought you should know what kind of monster you were dating. Someone out there obviously cares about you enough, just as I do, to send this to you. Don't you see? You're nothing special to him, Ana, but you are to me. You're my whole reason for existing, Ana, and I will-" José continues but I ignore him, looking at the photos again.

The photos mean nothing to me, expect the fact that I'm one of many. I get that some people have tastes, specific tastes, attracted to different qualities, but the similarity is striking. It's not just Stephanie, the mysterious Sub, and I, that look alike. It's. Every. Single. Submissive. that he's ever had.

"Monster." I whisper the word.

 _Is this why he thinks of himself as a monster? Oh, Christian, no._

"Yup!" I hear José, popping the 'p', sounding proud of himself. "Good thing you have me now."

I look up at José who looks just as proud and happy, standing with a grin on his face and his hands in his pockets.

"You're right, José." I lie.

"I am?" He asks surprise. "I am." Sounding more confident and nodding in agreement.

"José, I'm really hungry." I continue to lie. I'm not hungry at all, I have no appetite, but it's been hours since I've last ate so it's plausible.

"Oh. I'm sorry. I'll go get you something. I'll grab you something to wear too."

"That would be great." I smile a fake grateful smile.

I just need to get him out of here so I can escape from this monster and get back to mine. I love my monster, and he's not a monster to me. He's just Christian. My Christian. _My FiftyShades_. I know the truth and it's not what Mrs. Robinson claims, it's not in these photos that show he's into women that look similar for some strange reason, it's not José saying I'm not special to Christian. They're all trying to fill me with doubt, pull me away, but it's not working. I don't care what they say, I'm in love with Christian. And I know he loves me too.

José walks back to the table and picks up something before he walks back over to me.

"I'll be right back." He grins.

"Great." _Yes, leave._

"Ana."

"What?"

"I'm only doing this so you don't go anywhere or try anything while I'm gone."

 _What is he talking about?_

Before I'm able to ask, he shoves a cloth on my face, covering my mouth and nose. I drop the photos and try fighting against him, but it's useless, and it doesn't take long for my body to give in and me to fall into unconsciousness.

* * *

 **CPOV**

 _~AFTERNOON~_

We exit the helicopter and make our way down in the elevator, most uncomfortable moment of my life, and walk out to the SUV that Taylor had organized for me to use. It's parked, waiting for us, with José Rodríguez's father's home address already programmed into the GPS since that's where he's been staying for the summer.

I climb into the driver's seat while Garrett hops in the passenger side.

"You must like the power of being thé Christian Grey."

"I do." I can't help my evil villain grin. I'm used to getting my own way; everything I want, I know how to achieve it.

Thank fuck it's quiet now while I drive, as we're much more focused on our task of finding Anastasia than we were in the air.

"Oh, fuck." I hear Garrett groan.

"What?" I ask him as we pull into the Rodriquez's neighborhood.

"I think that's Anastasia's father's truck. He's friends with the fucker's father."

I see a truck in the distance, parked in front of the house that seems to be our destination.

I've met Anastasia's mother but I have yet to met her father. I'd rather of met him with Anastasia and in clean clothes. I look like the world's most expensively dressed homeless man with my Armani suit wrinkled and dirty from my searching the woods on the side of the road for Anastasia.

"He doesn't like me."

"Why's that?" I laugh at his discomfort.

"Because I fucked his daughter."

My amusement soon dies, and I grip the steering wheel so tight my knuckles turn white, when I remember Garrett has fucked Anastasia, then I pale when I realize I'm fucking Mr. Steele's daughter now. _Oh fuck!_

"I only met him once." He continues to tell me when I stay quite. "She introduced me to her father at her graduation. He was very curt and taciturn. I could see the way he looked at me, like he wanted to kill me for touching his daughter, wondering what a man nearly 10 years her senior was doing with her, and coming to the conclusion I wanted her for one thing. For me being a Dominant, I was pretty terrified to be meeting her father. I'm sure you know, he's ex-Army, owns guns and shit. I guess Anastasia has never had a boyfriend before me. Talk about high expectations."

Actually, I didn't know until recently. I did run the background check and just like with Anastasia's mother, I didn't read much about her father either. After the incident in Georgia, I did go over Anastasia's background check once more, and found that her birthfather died, but noticed she carries the last name of stepfather number 1, husband number 2 for her mother, and the longest lasting marriage.

Oh well, I guess I'm meeting her father now as we've arrived and parked in front of the neighbors home. The Rodríguez's driveway in our front view.

"Wait." I stop from opening my door when I hear Garrett and look at him questioningly.

"What?"

"That's him." He nods toward the house. "Rodríguez."

I look at where he's gesturing to and see a young male, with tanned skin, dark hair, dark eyes, walking towards a car with a limp carrying a brown paper sack and a backpack. I don't see Anastasia anywhere in site. _Where is she?_

I'm about to get out and approach him when I hear Garrett again.

"Let's follow him."

"Let's kick his ass until he tells us where Anastasia is." I like my suggestion better.

"What if he doesn't tell us. What if the temper radiating from your body snaps and you do far more damage than necessary and you knock him out before he can tell us. What if we involve the police and he still doesn't tell us. All these scenarios leave us with no clue as to where Ana is and her being held for longer. Let's follow him, he's in his car now, he's probably going to wherever he's keeping her."

"Fine." I grit out between my teeth and follow the fucker.

I stay a close enough distance away so he wont notice anything suspicious but close enough to keep an eye on where he's going.

He leads us through downtown Portland to a warehouse type building.

"Portland Place?" Garrett asks, curious, when he sees where we've been lead to. "I was supposed to take Anastasia here to see his photography show."

We stay out of view as we watch him park behind the building.

We quietly exit our vehicle and follow him.

When Garrett and I enter the building, the silence is deafening.

We sneak around but don't see anything, Rodríguez, Anastasia, nothing. It's empty.

 _Where the fuck did he go?!_

We hear a noise so we turn around and follow it.

It's quiet again but we follow the noise we heard in the direction of some stairs.

After we descend in stealth mode, we come up to a door. There's light seeping through the cracks and some noises on the other side.

I check the door but it's locked, so I look to Garrett and nod. He returns my nod and together we break the door.

"Oh fuck." The fucker breathes when he sees us, dropping his brown paper bag onto the floor, and remaining stock still.

We're both standing in our Dominant stance, pinning him with our death glares. Even though it's just a look, I'm actually quite surprised this fucker is still standing, although he does look scared shitless, so he very well should be.

I leave Garrett to watch the fucker as I frantically search the room for Anastasia.

Much to my surprise, she's everywhere.

Photographs of her line the walls.

In the photographs she's pouting, laughing, scowling, serious, amused.

I continue to search around the room until my eyes land on a small figure in the corner, laying on a white leather couch.

Ana.

When I see the state she's in I feel venom fill my veins.

She's laying unconscious, only wearing a shirt, panties, stockings with a garter belt, and a man's jacket. Her hair and body are dirty, but I don't see any signs of injury from this distance.

I'm breathing like a bull, ready to strike, and it doesn't take long before I do.

I charge at the fucker Rodríguez, shoving him against a wall. A few of the photographs of Anastasia have fallen in the process.

I'm almost on auto pilot as I continue to strike him again and again. I don't know what the fuck happened, but what other reason could there be for her skirt to be off and her to be unconscious?! I may have overreacted with Garrett, but this fucker right here, fucked his life up when he decided to fuck with me and take my girl.

"Grey. ... Grey. ..." I ignore Garrett, I ignore everything except the satisfying crunch beneath my fists. "Grey, Ana's waking up. She needs you. Stop."

I drop the fucker and stand, panting as I run my shaking hand through my hair. Rodríguez is coughing up blood and wheezing in pain holding his stomach.

I turn around to find Anastasia stirring so I leave Garrett to deal with Rodríguez as I make my way to my girl.

I hear Rodríguez groan in pain and complaining about his leg, but I don't look to see what Garrett is doing to him, keeping my sight on Anastasia.

As I walk towards her I notice a bunch of photographs on the floor, spread out like someone dropped them. To my surprise they are not of Anastasia, but to my horror, they are of my previous Submissives in my Playroom. _How the fuck did the fucker get these?!_

 _Fuck! Anastasia has seen these! Now instead of Elena and Leila telling her, she has proof I'm a fucked up sadist._

I rush to her to help her and hopefully explain what I don't know how to explain.

"No." I hear her weakly squeak out when I approach her. She's trying to become alert, blinking her eyes rapidly.

"Ana, baby." I breathe with relief that she seems to be okay.

"Stay... away.. you.. you're a monster." She whispers.

"No." My whole world crumbles around me as she says this to me.


	30. (30) Now, It's Known

**CPOV**

"Grey. ... Grey. ..." I ignore Garrett, I ignore everything except the satisfying crunch beneath my fists. "Grey, Ana's waking up. She needs you. Stop."

I drop the fucker and stand, panting as I run my shaking hand through my hair. Rodríguez is coughing up blood and wheezing in pain, holding his stomach.

I turn around to find Anastasia stirring so I leave Garrett to deal with Rodríguez as I make my way to my girl.

I hear Rodríguez groan in pain and complaining about his leg, but I don't look to see what Garrett is doing to him, keeping my sight on Anastasia.

As I walk towards her I notice a bunch of photographs on the floor, spread out like someone dropped them. To my surprise they are not of Anastasia, but to my horror, they are of my previous Submissives in my Playroom. _How the fuck did the fucker get these?!_

 _Fuck! Anastasia has seen these! Now instead of Elena and Leila telling her, she has proof I'm a fucked up sadist._

I rush to her to help her and hopefully explain what I don't know how to explain.

"No." I hear her weakly squeak out when I approach her. She's trying to become alert, blinking her eyes rapidly.

"Ana, baby." I breathe with relief that she seems to be okay.

"Stay... away.. you.. you're a monster." She whispers.

"No." My whole world crumbles around me as she says this to me.

"I don't.. want you. ... Leave me.. alone."

 _No. Please. No_.

I never thought of myself as having a heart, but now I know I do because it's breaking.

"Ha!" I vaguely hear someone shout, but it's like I'm under water, as my world falls apart. "She doesn't want you! She wants me! We belong together. You're a mmm-"

I turn around when Rodríguez hums then suddenly stops talking to see Garrett gagging him.

"Shut the fuck up!" Garrett yells at Rodríguez pulling his hair before he roughly releases him, then looks at me.

"I was in the middle of a scene when you walked in." He shrugs unashamed, as a way of explaining the ball gag and... Are those cable ties?

 _He buys his BDSM shit at hardware stores? Why didn't I think of that?_

I turn back to Anastasia who seems to be moving around a bit more but is burrowing her head in the couch, refusing to look at me.

"Ana," I begin softly only to stop and run my fingers through my hair.

"Christian." It pains my heart when she cries my name. "I _want_ Christian."

 _What?!_

"Baby, I'm here." I go to her now, sitting on the edge of the couch to touch her.

"Christian?" She cries as she turns to face me.

"It's me, baby, I'm here. I'm right here."

She must have thought I was that bastard. Now I realize it wasn't such a good idea to use her nickname that I don't think I have ever used before. It's just I could barely get anything out, so relieved she's okay, so terrified she didn't want me anymore. Now she's saying she wants me after seeing the proof herself what kind of fucked up monster I really was.

"Christian!" She lunges for me.

I pull her towards me so she's draped over my lap. I wrap my arms around her, holding her tightly, and burry my nose in her hair, inhaling deeply. Her intoxicating scent instantly calms me, finally my frantic heart can rest a little easier.

"Oh, baby." I hope I'm not squeezing her too tightly.

"José." She pulls back speaking frantically. Her eyes are now bright blue and lined with red. "And Elena. And some Sub I don't know... They all-"

"I know, baby." I kiss her lips so thankful that she's in my arms and not running terrified of me. "I know."

"Oh, Christian." She cries and holds me tightly. "I thought I'd never see you again."

"No chance of that happening, baby." I put some of her hair behind her ear and kiss her head, as I continue to hold her close. "You can't hide from me, Anastasia, I will always find you."

"If I didn't love you," She sniffs. "That would sound creepy."

I chuckle a bit because I realize it does sound 'creepy', as she called it, and that wasn't my intention.

"Are you hurt, Anastasia?" I ask her serious now, as I check every inch of her body with my hands and eyes.

 _Please tell me you're not_.

"No." She shakes her head. "I'm fine."

As I examine her, I see that she has a scrap on her knee and her cheek is a bit red, but she's otherwise unscathed, just dirty.

"Where's your skirt, baby?" I try to sound gentle, but I can hear the demanding tone in my voice that I don't intend to use towards her.

I really don't want to know, but I need to know.

"José." She puts her hair behind her hair as she continues. "I kicked him with my heels trying to get away from him, and he ripped my skirt from my body to use it as a tourniquet and to tie my hands. I thought he was going to rape me, but he didn't touch me."

 _Fucker!_

I turn to face him.

He's now pale as he stares at me with wide scared brown eyes, cowardly trying to hide in the wide open space he's sitting in.

"Chad?" I hear Anastasia ask confused. She must of followed my gaze.

"Hey." He nods his hello, staying near Rodriquez.

"What are you doing here?"

"I came to help find you." He shrugs.

"With Christian?" She's surprised now. The matter with Rodriquez long forgotten as I smirk at her surprise.

"Yup." He confirms.

"And the two of you got along?" She asks me now, suspicious of us working together. "You didn't hit him or anything like that, did you?"

"Oh," Garrett speaks up. "He did hit me."

"Christian!" Anastasia reprimands me.

I would laugh if the situation where different.

"I thought the worst. I couldn't find you." I run my fingers through my hair as I explain a little of what happened, telling her how worried I was, leaving out the fact that I thought she left me for him and how I found him and Stephanie in a very suggestive position when I 'entered' his office unannounced, or the fact that I thought Stephanie was Anastasia.

"Your stalker tendencies knows no bounds." She hugs me again and I return it. "And for that I am immensely grateful."

"I would never stop looking until I found you." I tell her as I kiss her head and inhale her scent.

"I just can't believe you and Chad found me _together_. I knew _you_ would, I didn't know how, but I didn't think you would go to Chad for help."

"We set aside our differences to find you."

I hear sirens and look at Garrett who nods to confirm that he called them. I look at the floor to find my Submissive photos are no longer there so I look up at Garrett who now winks at me. _Fucker._ I smirk and nod my thanks.

"Let's get you covered a bit more, baby." I reach for the throw blanket that's draped across the back of the couch and cover her bottom half before anyone enters the room. _They're just legs, Grey... My legs._

It doesn't take long for what sounds like thunder coming down the stairs and dozens of uniforms fill the small basement room of the Portland Place warehouse.

Rodríguez is taken into custody and treated for his injuries he sustained by both Anastasia and myself. The fucker had a broken nose, they believe either cracked or broken ribs, and needed stitches to close the wound caused by Anastasia's stilettos which already started to get infected because he didn't clean it properly. Too bad they don't amputate it along with his dick.

Anastasia is tended to by an EMT. They give her a pair of scrub bottoms to wear instead of the throw blanket I found. Anastasia tells the EMT that Rodríguez used chloroform on her and she received the scrap on her knee at Escala's parking garage when she fell. They bandage her scrap and clear her from needing any further medical attention so she doesn't need to be taken to the hospital.

The EMT even cleans up my knuckles.

Next the detective investigating the attempted murder wants to ask Anastasia questions about the situation. He tells her he can speak to her another day, but Anastasia is adamant and wants to get it over with now. He asks Anastasia to confirm Leila Williams was her attacker and her point of view on what happened in the parking garage. I saw that scene on the CCTV, but hearing her prospective is intense.

They also go over how Rodríguez was able to kidnap Anastasia and what all happened with him. I don't leave Anastasia's side while she gives her statement so hearing all the shit that happened in the woods makes me want to hit that fucker all over again.

While Anastasia was giving her statement, I sent Taylor a message to let him know he can call off the dogs I know he hired to help find her, because Anastasia is safe, and with me.

The detective explains to Anastasia what will happen regarding Leila, Rodríguez, and Elena, which reminds me I need to call my father.

Once we're given the okay to leave, and Anastasia is fully checked over a second time at my request, Anastasia, Garrett and I head out to my SUV. I notice Garrett put a manila envelope in the compartment on the passenger side, and I'm assuming it's my previous Submissive photos.

"I just have to make a quick phone call." I let them know, before we leave.

I need to call my father, before Elena, to warn him off. I'd much rather talk to him in private, but I at least have to warn him not to help her if she calls before I get a chance to talk to him.

Anastasia gives me a chaste kiss, and I walk a few steps away to have some privacy, but I still have her in my sights.

She and Garrett are talking like old friends near the SUV. Anastasia is sitting in the back with the door open and her legs hanging out, and Garrett is standing near her, leaning against the SUV. I notice it's nothing like how Elena and I were when we were acquainted. Elena would always be overly friendly. Anastasia and Garrett's body language suggest they are more like siblings than friends, you wouldn't even think they've been together romantically.

I quickly pull my phone out, not wanting to think about that any further, them being together, and dial my father's number.

 _"Christian?"_ He sounds almost surprised to be hearing from me. _"Son, this is quite the surprise. To what do I owe this phone call?"_

Okay, not so much almost sounding as he actually is surprised. It makes me feel like shit, that I've neglected my parents and siblings all these years. I vow to myself to be more involved with my family. My family that chose me and loves me unconditionally regardless of what Elena brainwashed me to believe. I just can't believe it's taken me this long to finally figure all this out.

I guess that's the power of love, the love of a good woman.

I smile at Anastasia and my heart thaws a bit more as I watch her smile at me in return.

 _"Christian? Are you there?"_

"Yeah." I answer when he pulls me from my thoughts. "Hey, dad. Listen, a lot has happened, and I need to talk to you and mom about it. I'm in Portland right now, but I'd like to speak to you both in person. It's about... It's about Elena."

 _"Elena?"_

"Yeah, she's been arrested, so I'm sure you'll be getting a call from her soon when she's given the opportunity. I'm sure she will ask for your services, for you to help her, but I urge you to reconsider and not help her."

 _"Son, why are you asking me not to help your mother's friend? Why has she been arrested?"_

"Trust me, dad, she's no friend." I don't want to get too far into this conversation so I wrap it up. "She's been charged with accessory to murder."

 _"Murder?!"_

"Yes. She hired someone to... Well, you know. And that person she wanted 'gone' was my girlfriend, Anastasia."

 _"I don't understand, son."_

"I know. But like I said, I want to discuss this with you and mom in person. I'm leaving Portland now and I'll come right over as soon as I'm changed... There's more I need to tell you. You're not going to like it."

 _"Alright, son."_ He's apprehensive, so he should be. _"I'll let your mother know and we'll expect you in a few hours."_

"Thank you."

I hang up and make my way back over to my Anastasia and Garrett.

"You drive." I say, tossing my keys to Garrett.

I want to sit in the back with my girl and it's too long of a drive not to hold her.

Garrett strolls to the driver's side and I help Anastasia into the back so I can sit next to her.

Anastasia and I are sitting close to each other, wrapped in one another's arms as Garrett pulls out and drives toward Seattle.

 _How weird is this?_

I glance at Anastasia and she seems lost.

"Hey." I call her attention softly so she will look at me and stop playing with her hands. "You okay?"

"Yeah," She gives me a small smile. "I'm fine. I'm just over thinking as usual."

"About what, baby?"

She shakes her head as if to tell me she doesn't want to talk about it, and as much as I don't want to talk with Garrett present, I have to know we're okay. I've only ever known one way, and that way was fucking, but our relationship is different, we talk.

"Talk to me, baby."

"I'm just so glad you found me. I was so frightened."

"Baby, I would move heaven and earth to find you, I would never of gave up until you were safe in my arms where you belong."

"Thank you, Christian." She lays her head on my shoulder as she hold my arm.

"When we return home, I'll be assigning you a personal body guard. He's to go with you wherever you go. No exceptions." I use my Dom voice so she knows I'm serious and mean business, but she just smiles, then she bites her lip so her smile doesn't turn into a massive face splitting grin that is threatening to break through.

"What?" I ask curious of her behavior.

"Nothing." She shakes her head then agrees by saying, "Okay."

"When we get back to Seattle, I have to go to my parents' place and tell them about Elena. I'd like you to come with me if you aren't too exhausted."

I could really use her support, and I know what kind of day she's had, but I really don't want her out of my sight.

 _Fuck what was I thinking_.

"I'll just ask my parents to come to Escala." I reach inside my pocket to get my phone out, but she stops me.

"No, I'll come with you." She whispers on the edge of sleep now.

"Are you sure?"

"Yes."

"If you're too tired, baby, we can just stay home." I kiss the top of her head.

She doesn't reply, just smiles again.

"What?" I ask, suspicious now, pressing for a reason why she's so happy.

"You said... _home_." She whispers.

"I did." I agree, but I don't know why... _Oooh._ She was to stay with me until whoever broke in was caught, and he's just been arrested, but there's no way I'm letting her out of my sight again. Wait, is she smiling because I'm referring to Escala as home, as in _our_ home.

Now it's my turn to smile.

"Will you move in with me?" I whisper as I nuzzle her ear.

I hear a tiny gasp, but what she says surprises me. "I- I don't know, Christian."

"What?" I frown and pull away from her to look at her face. Maybe I was wrong. "What do you mean, you don't know?"

"I mean just that." She looks down at her hands now. "I'm not sure..."

 _Is this because of what I said, or didn't say rather, about loving her? Or is there some other reason why she's refusing?_

It reminds me of something Grandfather Trevelyan told me; it takes a real man to love a strong woman.

"Anastasia." I didn't plan to profess my love for her in the back of the car while her ex was driving, but here goes nothing, or everything.

"Before I met you, I was a coldhearted businessman without a care in the world. I exercised control, in all things. My world was neat, organized, disciplined, everything was how I wanted it, when I wanted it."

I see her frown and her eyes water like I'm telling her I actually miss my old way of life.

I may have been the master of my universe, but now she's the mistress of mine.

"Unlike anyone I have ever met before, you seem to see past the billionaire and penthouse lifestyle and see me as me, just Christian. My life was utterly empty, until the day I logged onto that chat site and started messaging a stranger who's penname was _BlushingRose_. ... I think I loved you then."

And it's true. I loved talking with her online before I even knew she was my type to a fucking T. I thought she was Katherine fucking Kavanagh, for fuck's sake, and I still enjoyed talking with her.

"You. Wait. What did you just say?" She asks stunned at what I finally said.

"I love you." It comes out so naturally, like I've been saying it daily, hourly, every second of the day.

"What?" She laughs unbelieving she heard me right.

"I. Love. You." I say each word carefully and with meaning so she hears me clearly.

"I know." She repeats what I said to her when she told me, though she's smiling.

 _Thank fuck she knows!_

"I'm sorry I didn't tell you when you told me, I just didn't feel I deserved your love. But I love you, Anastasia, I do. More than I have ever-" I'm cut off by her unbuckling her safety belt and climbing on my lap, straddling me and kissing me with passion.

My hands automatically fly to her hips as hers thrust into my hair, fisting it. I moan when she tugs my hair, pulling me closer.

"Say it again." She demands, her lips never leaving mine.

"I love you. I love you. I love you."

She moans, fisting my hair tighter.

"I love you, Christian."

We continue to kiss.

I sweep my tongue across her lips, begging for entrance which is immediately granted.

While we're kissing, I hear a throat being cleared multiple times. I almost forgot it was Garrett driving us and not the usual Taylor.

Anastasia doesn't stop, or bother acknowledging Garrett's discomfort, as she continues kissing me, deepening our kiss.

"Don't mind me." I hear Garrett say with amusement from the driver's seat.

I move both my hands off Anastasia's hips to double flip Garrett off while I continue to kiss my girl.

 _ **~..~..~**_

Anastasia fell asleep halfway through our trip but woke about 10 minutes before we got home. The drug wore off, but the events of the day have exhausted her. Thank fuck Garrett took a different route so we didn't drive passed the wooded area where Rodríguez took Anastasia.

Garrett drove us to Escala where Sawyer was waiting to drive Garrett home so he could bring my SUV back to me.

I still have to introduce Anastasia to Sawyer, her now CPO.

Instead of taking Anastasia through the underground garage where everything happened, we enter through the front main lobby of the building. She assures me she's fine with going in the garage, but I'm still recovering from just watching the footage, there's no way I want to go in the garage just yet.

Anastasia and I are now in the elevator on the way up to our apartment. Yes, our apartment. She agreed to move in with me shortly after our make out session, perhaps it was in the middle, I can't be sure, because after she agreed, I kissed her again. Seems she didn't think it was a good idea to move in with someone who didn't or couldn't express his love for her.

I never would have imagined kissing her in the back seat while Chadwick fucking Garrett drove us.

"He's not such a bad guy." I comment.

"Who?" She asks lazily as we hold each other.

"Garrett."

"Why do you think I stayed his friend." She frowns and I'm a bit confused. Before I can question why, she continues. "You don't have many friends, do you?"

I snort thinking I now have no friends since Elena is officially out of my circle.

"No. Just business associate and my family, though that's very different from friendships, I suppose. Apart from Elena, I didn't have any friends."

"No male friends your own age that you can go out with and do guy stuff with?"

I shake my head. "I've been working, building up the business. No time for friendships."

"Not even in college?"

"Not really." I had my rowing mates, but we weren't buddies who went out to parties, we were teammates and only for the two years I attended Harvard.

"She alienated you." She says with a frown and concern in her blue eyes. "You must of felt so alone."

I shrug. It didn't feel that way then, but looking back, I see that now.

"You know, if you weren't so jealous of Chad," She continues. "And you got passed the whole he had me first and the Alpha male thing. I could see you two as friends."

"I don't see that ever happening."

Regardless of him being with Stephanie now, he's Anastasia's ex, he's had her, he's had what's mine, and that's something I could not 'get passed'. I hate to admit though, we did have... fun... and connected in the helicopter, regardless of the severity of the situation that brought us together in that moment. Maybe... _Nawh, it wont happen_.

"I'm friends with Stephanie." She tries to make me see reason, when there's none to be seen.

"I'm very happy for you."

I feel aroused when she rolls her eyes, but control myself. She's just been through quite the traumatic experience.

It doesn't take long for the elevator to arrive at the penthouse floor. We both need to shower and Anastasia needs to eat before we leave.

"Welcome home, baby." I tell her as we step off the elevator.

She just smiles in response.

"You are not to leave here alone." I remind her again using my Dominant tone so she knows I mean it. "Do you understand me."

"Yes, sir." She smirks teasingly.

"Oh, Anastasia." I murmur as I hold her close and look into her beautiful blue eyes. "What are you doing to me?"

"Hopefully what you do to me."

"Go shower, baby," I kiss her gently. "I'll be right there."

She walks away, toward our bedroom to shower, and I walk toward our kitchen to arrange our meal.

"Mr. Grey!" Gail shrieks when she sees me.

I look down at my dirty business suit. It looks like I went hiking with bears.

Gail apologizes for her unprofessional outburst, but I wave her off apologizing for startling her, and ask her to arrange a lite lunch for Anastasia and myself.

I let Taylor know we'll be leaving for Bellevue shortly after lunch. He already knows Sawyer is to be Anastasia's CPO and they need to officially be introduced.

When I walk into the bedroom, I can hear the shower on in the master bath so I make my way, taking my clothing off as I go.

Through the glass shower wall, I can see her shoulders shaking like she's laughing but I know she's crying.

I'm naked now so I step in, wrapping my arms around her.

She quickly turns around in my arms and buries her face against my chest as she wraps her arms around me, continuing to cry.

"It's okay, baby." I kiss her wet hair multiple times. "It's okay. You're safe."

"I- I was so.. frightened, Christian." She shutters out. "I thought... I thought..."

"Did you doubt my stalking capabilities?" I joke, with a hint of sincerity, trying to take her mind off of the events that happened.

"How?" She sniffs, pulling away to look at me. "How did you find me? And so quickly?"

"I sensed something was wrong. We may have had a disagreement the night before, but it's not like you to not answer or return my calls and/or messages for hours. I tracked your phone to Elena's salon."

This earns me a small giggle. I kiss her head and continue.

"I saw the CCTV footage from the garage." I hold her tight so thankful that she's here with me, that Leila is terrible with a gun. "It killed me that I couldn't do anything, that it happened hours earlier. I died a thousand deaths when I heard those shots, and then someone in pain. I was terrified something happened to you."

We hold each other tight for awhile before I continue.

"I returned to Elena to get answers on your whereabouts. I threatened to kill her with my bare hands if she didn't tell me where you were. I'm surprised she told me what seems to be the truth, but she told me you ran away with a love sick boy. The only 'love sick boy' I knew was Garrett. I went to him and he told me about José Rodríguez. Together, he and I looked for you and Rodríguez. We went to his father's home in Portland. He was there, just coming out of the house, so we followed him, and he led us straight to you. It seems you had to deal with the envy of my exes on top of an obsessed crazy man that wanted you, all in one day. I'm sorry, baby, I'm so sorry."

"It's not your fault, Christian."

"I should have told you I loved you last night because I did, I do. If I had, maybe you wouldn't have saw Elena, looking for answers."

"It would of happened another way. José is the one who stole the GEH security badge. I suspect Elena sent me photos of your previous Submissives to try and scare me away because they all look so similar, but it wouldn't have worked and it didn't. Besides, I'm the one who gave her that idea. She probably became upset that it didn't work, that none of her efforts were working at splitting us up, so she resorted to having that Sub come after me. Everything that happened today wasn't related to each other, but it all would have happened, just a different way, and the outcome could have been worse than today's."

 _ **~..~..~**_

After our shower, Anastasia and I ate our lunch while I told her about my start to life, my birthmother, the pimp, why I thought I was a sadist, everything. I'm so fucking surprised she doesn't think I was a monster but I'm not questioning why, just grateful she doesn't agree.

We are now on our way to my parents' home to tell them about my relationship and past with Elena.

I know Anastasia is exhausted from the day she had today, but it means so much to me that she's here to support me. I tried to tell her we could stay home and just have my parents come over, but she wanted to get out.

Taylor drove us since I can't seem to keep my hands off of Anastasia. I have to hold her.

We've just arrived at my parents house, and we're heading towards the door when it swings open.

"Oh, honey." My mother rushes out to capture Anastasia into a motherly hug. "Carrick's told me a little of what happened. How are you doing?"

"I'm okay, Grace. Thank you."

"Let's go inside." I say to the two most important women in my life. Both changed my life for the better.

I keep my hand on Anastasia's lower back as I guide her into the foyer.

"Ana," My dad finally comes from the main sitting room. My mother must of been on the edge of her seat and jumped when we pulled up.

"How are you holding up, darling girl?" He asks her.

"I'm doing okay. It was just a really scary experience that I hope to never go through again."

They don't even know the half of it. They don't know she was kidnapped by a man who is obsessed with her, all they know is I told them Elena tried to have her killed. They don't even know how.

"Shall we sit?" I ask the group, ready to get this over with. "I have to tell you guys something."

"Of course, son." My father says, leading us to the main sitting room.

We all take our seats, my parents are sitting across from Anastasia and I.

I don't know where or how to begin, I'm just leaning my forearms on my thighs as I play with my hands and avoiding all eye contact. They're going to hate me. I don't want them to hate me. It's so quiet while they wait patiently for me to begin.

I flinch slightly when I feel Anastasia's hand on my lower back, not from pain, but from surprise.

She feels the way my body tensed so she removes her hand quickly from my back and putting it on my thigh, giving me a reassuring squeeze.

"You can do it, Christian." She encourages me. "They deserve to know."

I turn my head to look at Anastasia, still avoiding my parents.

"I should have told them sooner." I whisper.

"Yes." She agrees, sternly. "You should have, but they deserve to know. It's better late than never."

"They'll hate me." I'm still whispering.

"They're your parents." She reasons. "They love you, unconditionally, and that will never change. Tell them. You'll be surprised by their reaction, and it wont be aimed towards you, you'll see."

I lick my dry lips and nod, looking back down before I clear my throat and begin. I really don't want to see the disappointment on their faces.

"As you know, Elena was arrested for being the accomplice in the attempted murder of Anastasia." I begin. "What you don't know is why."

I risk a quick glance up at my parents. They are listening intently.

"Elena was, is, envious of Anastasia. She thought if she got rid of Anastasia, that she and I ... would be together."

"What?" My mother questions. "Why would Elena think that?"

I take a deep breath and let it out slowly before I explain.

"Because she and I... Elena and I... We... We were involved before."

"Involved?" My father asks but the way he says it, he knows exactly what I'm trying to say.

"We..." I clear my throat. "We had a sexual relationship." I clarify then clamp my hand over my mouth, with my elbow resting on my thigh, like I didn't just say that.

"What?!" My mother shrieks.

"Why did we never know of this?" My father asks.

"I knew you wouldn't approve."

"How long ago?" My father asks. Thank fuck he didn't ask when it began.

"When did it begin?" I thought too soon as my mother asks in an eerily quiet tone. I'm not sure anyone heard her, but I sure did.

"It ended when I was around 21." I admit, ignoring my mother's question and focus on my father's.

Hopefully my mother wont repeat her question even though I need to tell them everything without being too specific with the details.

"7 years ago," My father says to himself. "And she's just now doing something about it?"

"I've never been in a romantic relationship before Anastasia." I explain, holding onto Anastasia's hand for dear life.

"I've only had sexual partners, including Elena." I don't want to go into too much detail about the whole BDSM thing with my parents.

"So when Anastasia and I started to show more of a romantic relationship rather than just a sexual relationship, Elena became jealous and tried to get Anastasia to stay away from me, thinking she and I would be together again if I was available. When that didn't work, keeping Anastasia away from me, Elena..." I trail off not wanting to say more or think of the fucked up shit that happened today with Leila and Elena. It's bad enough I'm sitting here, 28 fucking years old, talking to my parents about my sex life.

"She organized everything to have Anastasia out of her way and my life... permanently."

"When. Did. It. Begin?" My mother asks slowly, loudly, and clearly being sure I hear her this time.

I stay quiet, avoiding the look my mother and father are giving me, and the look they will give me when they know the truth.

"Christian." My mother calls my attention. "How old were you? Tell me how old you were when this began?"

"Fifteen." I mumble shakily, but feels like I shouted the number.

The silence is unnerving, you could hear a pin drop it's so quiet, but I dare not look at them, afraid of the look I may see on their face.

"What?" My mother breathes, breaking the silence first, but it sounds like she's using a bullhorn to speak.

"Fifteen." I say louder but not by much.

"How did this happen?" My father asks. "How did it begin?"

"It started when you..." _No. It's not their fault._ "It started when I went to the Lincoln's to clear the debris from their yard as punishment. She brought out lemonade because it was a hot day. I made some smart ass remark, I don't even remember what I said, and she slapped me for it. ... Then she kissed me. ... I became... aroused, and she slapped me again because of it. She told me to come back the next day for more and I did. That's when it began."

"Why?" My mother whispers horrified. "Why didn't you tell us? Anyone?"

"I wanted it. At the time, I thought I needed it. ... I was ashamed, I felt like such a failure. Everyone in this family is all so fucking perfect, and I here I am, a fuck up; drinking, fighting, failing school, I couldn't stand to be touched or hugged, therapist after therapist, nightmare after nightmare. I tried so fucking hard to be what you wanted me to be. I thought... I thought... I thought if I continued to be such a fuck up, you would..."

I swallow hard, not telling them I thought they wouldn't want me anymore and would send me to a foster home. Not telling them that I thought they would regret adopting such a fucked up little shit who couldn't stand to be touched in even the gentlest of ways, who got into fight after fight, kicked out of nearly every school I attended, with night-terrors that woke everyone up every fucking night so they moved my bedroom to the third floor. I knew I was a disappointment to them and thought it would only be a matter of time before they realized it themselves.

"... After I began things with Elena," I continue. "You looked at me differently. You looked happy. _I_ was making you happy. When I saw the change, I continued to go to her so she could help me." Though now I know she didn't help me at all. All she did was teach me how to fuck in a _very_ different way.

"You had to know it was wrong, son." My father speaks up after a long moment of silence.

I nod. "Why do you think I didn't tell anyone?"

"Oh my god." My mother whispers. I still have yet to look at my parents. "This is all my fault."

"What?!" I snap my head up to finally look at her.

She has tears falling from her eyes.

"NO!" I shout. "It's not your fault, mom."

 _Why would she think that?! It's preposterous that she would even think that._

"How can it not be?" She cries. "I forced you to work for her. You were trying to please me."

"Mom-" I start, but she continues.

"I thought she was my friend. I thought the hard work was helping you. I saw the changes in you and did nothing. I'm a pediatrician, it's a part of my job to spot abuse, and I can't even tell when my own child is suffering. What kind of mother am I?"

"Mom, please. Don't say that. You're a wonderful doctor and an amazing mother. Please don't think otherwise. This was my fault."

"No." I turn my head towards Ana who finally speaks up. She sounds exhausted.

"It's no one's fault except Elena's. You two can't blame yourselves, it will drive you crazy." Anastasia continues. "It's awful that this happened to Christian and to you, Grace and Carrick. I could only imagine if this happened to my child. Yes, Christian should have said something years earlier, when it happened, so she could have been given the proper punishment she so rightfully deserves, but it doesn't change the fact that it happened and it's not anyone's fault that it did, except hers. She used you and manipulated you all, you can't blame yourselves."

"Ana's right." Dad insists. "And I think we need to take a breather. We've been given a lot of information to take in, and Ana's had quite the day. Christian, son, why don't you take Ana home to get some rest, and we'll talk about this another time."

I'd rather not discuss this topic ever again.

I nod and help Anastasia to stand so we can say our farewells to my parents.

And for the first time in 24 years, I hug my mother. It's alien and feels nothing like Anastasia's touch, but it doesn't burn, it's bearable.

"I'm sorry, Christian." My mother cries out while we hug. "I'm so sorry."

"I know, mom. I am too."

She sniffs as she pulls away from our hold, patting my cheek with a loving sympathetic smile.

"I love you, Christian."

"I know. I love you too, mom."

I shake my father's hand and wait a bit while my parents and Anastasia say their farewells then led Anastasia outside to the SUV where Taylor is waiting for us. He opens the rear door and I help Anastasia inside. I buckle both her and I and sit back with my arms around her while Taylor drives us home.

While we're driving, I think about everything that's happened between Anastasia and I.

I think about how I felt when I would chat with _BlushingRose_ , about how I felt when I discovered Anastasia was my type, about how I felt when I thought Anastasia left me that day in my apartment when she just went to borrow chocolate chips from my staff, about how it felt when Anastasia and I broke up due to Elena's influence, about how I felt when I got her back, about how I felt when I thought she was hurt.

I think about how much I love this girl and how she makes me feel. I never thought I deserved to be loved. Elena made me believe I was a monster, that love was for fools, that it would make me weak. She was wrong. I'm not a monster, love is everything, and it makes you stronger.

I was frozen but Anastasia melted my cold heart.

I never thought I could love, but I do. I love her, and I want to be with her. Only her. Forever.

"Anastasia." I call her attention.

"Hmmm." She hums on the edge of sleep.

 _I know this is the least romantic way, and it's rather sudden, but,_

"Will you marry me?" I whisper then hold my breath.

"What?" She sits up fast, suddenly wide awake.

"Marry me." I say clearly now, with more conviction in my tone.

"Are you serious?" She searches my face.

"Very."

"Okay." She agrees in a dead serious tone.

"What?" I breathe.

I didn't expect it to be this easy to get her to agree. I don't even have a ring for fuck's sake. It just proves that I don't need to flash my cash for her to love me, want me, marry me. I don't need some over the top proposal and can almost guarantee she will want a small simple wedding, and that's perfectly fine with me.

"Yes." She giggles at my reaction. "I will marry you, I love you, there's nobody else for me. There's a lot we need to discuss before we actually get married, and you still need to meet my dad. My parents are going to freak. And then there's-"

I cut her off, kissing her with so much passion, more so than I ever have before.

My start to life may have been fucked up. My teenage and early adult years may have been fucked up. But I wouldn't change my life right now for anything in the world. My parents don't think I'm disgusting, Elena is where she belongs, I'm richer beyond belief, I have a beautiful girl, the love of my life, in my arms who consented to be my wife. She's changed me for the better without me even realizing it.

"Taylor," I pant, pulling away from Anastasia, my fiancé, when I need to breath.

"Sir."

"Take us to Cartier." I demand, keeping my eyes glued to Anastasia's.

"Yes, sir."

I ignore the glee in his tone as he makes the turn toward the jewelry store.

I may not have the whole bended knee thing, but my girl is going to have the best damn engagement ring, guarantee.

She's mine, all mine, and will only ever be mine for the rest of our lives. I may have stumbled upon that BDSM website, but it was the best damn decision of my life. I don't subscribe to luck or chance, but I am the luckiest man alive right now and it's all because of a chance online meeting.

"I love you, Anastasia."

"I love you, Christian."

"My _BlushingRose._ " I call her by her screen name.

"My _FiftyShades._ " She smiles, calling me by mine.

 **To Be Continued...  
**

* * *

 **A/N: _They didn't take_ Charlie Tango _back to Seattle because Christian wouldn't be able to hold his girl during the flight, even if he got a pilot they would still need to be strapped into their own separate seats._**


	31. (31) Ever After

**_~Epilogue~_**

 **CPOV**

 _ **~Three Months Later~**_

I can't believe it. I can't believe what I'm seeing. The proof is right in front of me and I can't fucking believe it. I didn't think it would happen this fast.

Never could I imagine, that we'd end up pregnant on our honeymoon. I wanted to show her the world first before we started having our family, but she forgot to take her birth control shot before we left and I didn't want to spend our honeymoon, as man and wife, using condoms for fuck's sake.

We decided to just go with it, and if it happened, it happened. I can almost guarantee it happened on our first night.

 _~FLASHBACK~_

 _"What are you doing?" She squeals when I lift her out of our Audi SUV, carrying her bridal style, aptly named, towards our private GEH jet._

 _"Carrying you over the threshold, Mrs. Grey." I explain as I climb the stairs effortlessly._

 _I put Anastasia down to speak with our captain, then take Anastasia to our seats after Stephan, our pilot, and his first officer has congratulated us both on our nuptials._

 _We fasten our safety belts just as the flight attendant serves us the champagne I requested and congratulates us, just as the captain and copilot did, then leaves she us._

 _I've told them I plan to sleep while we're in the air, so they know not to disturb us, but we wont be sleeping._

 _"So, will you tell me where we're going now?" Anastasia asks, curious as ever, after she's taken a sip of her champagne._

 _"I told you," I say nonchalantly. "I'm going to show you the world."_

 _She grins at me, her eyes sparkling looking beyond beautiful, and just seeing her in her bridal gown is turning me on. We need to get in the air so I can fuck my wife, no, make love to my wife. My wife, god I love the sound of that, and I never thought I would._

 _"But first," I continue after I've taken a sip of my champagne, and, of course, shifted in my seat to ease my erection. "London."_

 _"London?" She grins. I know she's always wanted to go._

 _"Then Paris."_ The city of love _. "We'll finish our honeymoon in the South of France."_

 _"I've always dreamed of going to Europe." She lights up, reminding me._

 _"I want to make all your dreams come true, Anastasia."_

 _"You are my dreams come true, Christian."_

You have no idea how the other way around that really is, baby.

 _The plane goes toward the runway and soon we are in the air._

 _As we fly, Anastasia and I sip our champagne, grinning at each other like the love sick fools we are._

 _Once we're given the all clear to move about the cabin, I put my champagne flute down, unfasten my seat belt and reach across to unclip my wife's._

 _"Come, Mrs. Grey." I tell her, standing and offering my hand to her._

 _I lead her to the back of the cabin where there is a bedroom._

 _I plan on spending our first moment as husband and wife at thirty-five thousand feet, but first, I have to get her out of that fabulous dress._

 _Watching her look about the room in her bridal gown, her beautiful brunette hair done in a perfect up-do, she's the epitome of perfection._

 _And she's all mine._

 _I walk up behind her, holding her around her tiny waist with one hand, and kissing her bare shoulder with open-mouthed kisses. It's going to be such a turn on to undress her, more so than any other time I have done the task. But first, let's take her hair down._

 _I reach up and pull each of the pins out in turn. Each section of her beautiful hair falls down, one after the other, until it's cascading down her back and around her shoulders to her breasts. I sweep her hair to one side, over her shoulder, and trace my finger along the lace edge of her bridal gown. She shivers at my touch so I tenderly kiss her just above the first button of her gown before I begin to unwrap my gift._

 _"So beautiful." I breathe. She took my breath away when I saw her walk down the aisle. It's been hours, but I swear, I still don't think I've taken a breath._

 _Next, I slowly undo the back of her dress, but I can't keep my lips off of her skin._

 _"You have made me the happiest man alive, Anastasia." I kiss her neck, continuing to unbutton her gown. "I feel so alive when I'm with you, baby."_

 _Her dress falls in a pool of silk and lace at her feet after I've unbuttoned it completely._

Oh, fuck!

 _She has on a blush pink corset with garter straps, matching lacy panties, and white silk stockings along with her sexy wedding stilettos._

 _"Turn around." My hoarse voice demands._

 _I feel my sharp intake of breath, when she slowly, painfully slowly I might add, obeys the command._

 _The front is so much better. She's... Beautiful is too insignificant of a word to use._

 _I don't know how long we stand here; me, gazing at her body in appreciation, while she looks at me through her lashes, waiting for my reaction, for me to say something, for me to breathe, I don't know, but she ends the silence first._

 _"Do you like?" She whispers with a slight blush creeping across her cheeks and breasts._

 _"More than like, baby." I barely get out. The strain in my trousers is proof._

 _I take my time as I unwrap my wife. Unhooking the front garters from her stockings first, then moving my hands to caress her behind, and unhooking the garters from the rear. I gently sit her on the bed, then bend on my knees in front of her to take off her bridal Jimmy Choos, then slowly peel off her sexy stockings. As much as I would love for her to leave these on, I want her naked, completely bare, just her._

 _It's like unwrapping the best gift ever._

 _I gently cup her face in my hands and softly kiss her lips, then I stand, pulling her up with me._

 _Before I can continue to undress her, she takes over, undressing me._

 _She takes off my tux jacket, my tie, vest and slowly unbuttons each button of my shirt._

 _I lean down and kiss her as we continue to undress each other. Her corset and panties along with my bottoms are off next._

 _I slowly lay her on the bed, continuing to kiss my wife, as I climb on top of her._

 _She wraps her arms around my neck, holding me, as I settle between her legs, and just before I can enter her,_

~BEEP. BEEP. ~ BEEP. BEEP. ~ BEEP. BEEP.~

 _I pull away from her lips when I hear a beeping sound come from the luggage I had Taylor bring on the jet before we arrived._

 _"What is that?" I ask out loud. It's distracting._

 _"Shit!" I feel Anastasia tense underneath me._

 _"What?" I ask her. "What is it?"_

 _"Oh my god." She groans, getting up, and unzipping her luggage to shut off the annoying sound coming from her phone._

 _"Baby?"_

 _"I'm sorry, Christian." She turns around to face me. "I- I totally forgot, with the wedding, planning and everything, I totally forgot."_

 _"Forgot what?"_

 _"My shot." She explains._

Shit!

 _"I forgot to renew my shot before our honeymoon, and my original appointment is, was, today. I forgot to reschedule my appointment sooner so I would be covered during our honeymoon, but it totally slipped my mind, with everything going on, since we got married so suddenly. I'm so sorry. I'm still covered, I think, at least for a couple days, I'm not really sure how that works, but we can just use condoms until we return home."_

Condoms? On our honeymoon?!

 _We had a long talk before we got married, about what we wanted. I wanted to marry her as soon as possible, but she wanted a longer engagement. We decided to 'negotiate' a few things, children being one. She was adamant on being a mother, and wouldn't agree to marry me unless I agreed. There was no way I was going to give her up over something like that, so I agreed. After all, I wanted to be her husband, I want to make all her dreams come true, and if she I wanted children, me being a father was evident._

 _So she agreed to marry me straight away, if I agreed to give her babies. We married within a month's time, after deciding and agreeing that we would wait at least a year before we started trying for a baby. The stipulation being she would quit working at Grey Publishing to stay home with our children while they were little. She actually hasn't returned to work since the fiasco that happened last month, because the media has been going crazy since_ Grey House _released a statement, not only saying we are in a committed relationship, but we're engaged to be married._

 _I know we agreed, but being a father is still terrifying to me, and now she's telling me she's not protected. We're not protected. Even if I had a condom, I wouldn't want to use a one our first time making love as husband and wife._

 _I've never done this before, but what if..._

 _"I can pull out." I suggest._

 _"Pulling out isn't a safe option, Christian." She tells me what I already know. "It's too risky."_

 _"I don't have any condoms, Anastasia, and even if I did, I wouldn't want to use them on our honeymoon." We're scheduled to be away for two fucking months. We could find a doctor at our first location, but, "How about, I pull out, and if we get pregnant, we get pregnant. If it happens, it happens sort of thing."_

 _"Are you sure?" She asks. I'm not sure if she's doubting my abilities if I will be able to pull out or not._

 _"Yeah, we're married so what's the big deal."_

 _It would be careless of me to knock her up if we weren't married. Not that it's 'wrong' to have a baby out of wedlock, but now that we're married, I can get my wife pregnant without getting frowned upon, not only in the public eye, but my parents and grandparents._

 _"But we agreed to wait at least a year." She reminds me._

 _"It will be fine." I assure her. "I'll just pull out."_

How hard could it be?

 _"Oookay." She's more apprehensive than I am. "But if we get pregnant, don't you dare blame me, Mr. I'll just pull out."_

Now that that's settled, let's continue...

 _I grab her wrist, and pull her to me, quickly getting her underneath me in a matter of seconds._

 _We continue our kissing, my cock is still rock hard while we were discussing our new birth control method, because we had the conversation while we were naked, and seeing Anastasia's naked body... I swear I'm permanently hard around her. She could be in sweats, all dolled up, naked, it doesn't matter, she'd make my dick stand at attention, begging, seeking her like he is now._

 _I keep my lips on hers as I slowly push my hips forward. Just as the head of my erection enters her, she flexes her hips up, meeting me, and together we connect in the most intimate way. I still, keeping my dick deep inside her, to let the connection intensify as we kiss._

 _We've had bare sex every time, with the exception of our first two encounters, but for some reason, it feels so much better._

Is it because she's my wife? Is it because it's unprotected? Is it the possibility that I could impregnate her? Maybe it's because we're in the air and the effects of the mile high club are true. Whatever the reason, it's thrilling _._

 _I slowly pull out and thrust back inside of her, all without taking my lips off of hers. She meets my thrusts as we continue to move together, building our release higher and higher. Our movements are slow, sweet, sensual lovemaking, as husband and wife._

 _I move my mouth, so we can breathe, and start kissing her everywhere I can reach as I make my way to her neck and we continue to make love._

 _I slide my dick out again and push deep inside of her, circling my hips, and without warning she denotes around me, moaning my name. Her sex grips me so tightly, and convulses around me, as wave after wave rips through her, that she steals my orgasm and I shoot off deep inside of her._

 _FUCK! FUCK! FUCK!_

 _"SHIT!"_

 _I quickly pull out, still cuming, and end up cuming all over her pussy._

So much for being able to pull out.

 _Seeing my cum all over her sex is such a fucking turn on that I'm still cuming and getting hard again all at once. Since I've already came inside of her, I slam back in, feeling the aftershock of her recent orgasm grip my dick as I finish my release inside of my wife._

 _~END OF FLASHBACK~_

Needless to say, we had more unprotected sex, without me trying to pull out.

We planned on getting Plan-B, the morning after pill, as soon as we landed in Boston to refuel, but then we would have had to find a doctor and get Anastasia on birth control, then wait for it to take effect before we had unprotected sex again, because Anastasia prefers the shot so she doesn't have to remember taking a pill every day. The shot takes 7 days before it takes effect. It was either, wait 7 days without sex, or use condoms for 7 days, on our honeymoon for fuck's sake, and using the pull out method would just be useless since I obviously can't do that.

She can't very well continue to get the morning after pill, the _emergency_ contraceptive, after each time we have unprotected sex, and it being our honeymoon... So we decided not to get the morning after birth control pill, and instead of pulling out, which I proved I can't do, I came inside of her all throughout our honeymoon, unprotected.

Once we returned to Seattle, the plan was to see her doctor and use condoms until we were sure she didn't get pregnant during our honeymoon and she can safely return to her regular form of birth control.

It's now the last day of our two month honeymoon, our flight is scheduled to leave in an hour, and Anastasia has just told me she thinks she's pregnant.

How cliché is it, that I would knock her up on our honeymoon, but it's possible with the way we've been going at it, all unprotected.

We ran out to get a home pregnancy test at a local pharmacy, and thank fuck we're not recognized here as we would have been in Seattle. I could just imagine the tabloids and their accusations. At least this way, we'll be able to hide it a bit longer.

We're in the bathroom of our hotel room now, Anastasia was too nervous to look at the results so she asked me to read it, but I can't get out what it says. I'm just staring at the test's positive results.

My chest feels heavy, but not in the dreaded bad way I thought I would feel if this ever happened. I almost don't know what I'm feeling, but it feels almost like pride. _She's pregnant_. I'm going to be a father, it was my seed that knocked her up, she's carrying my baby. The possessive caveman in me can't wait to see her swollen belly. I can't wait to run to the local 24-hour grocer to grab a tub of ice cream for her late night cravings, to rush her to the hospital when her water breaks and she goes into labor, to hold our child, that we made with love, for the first time.

"Christian," I hear Anastasia's timid voice, bringing me from my thoughts just as I imagine myself reading to our baby every night.

"What does it say?" She asks.

"It's positive." I finally get out. "You're pregnant."

I finally look at her, and I see just when it hits her.

"Pregnant." She whispers, with tears lining her eyes, making them even bluer if that's possible.

I hold my breath, almost expecting her to be upset with me, because it was my bright idea to do this, if it happens, it happens thing, but then she slowly grins.

"Pregnant?" She asks, her smile threatening to split her face in two. "We're pregnant?"

"We are." I confirm, smiling just as wide as she is.

She quickly gets off the floor, where she's sitting, and runs to me. I gladly pick her up and hold her in my arms, kissing every inch of her my mouth can reach.

I never thought I could be happier, but I'm now officially the happiest man that ever lived.

* * *

 _ **~Seven Months Later~**_

When we returned to Seattle, I had the top OB/GYN, Dr. Greene, look after Anastasia, and she confirmed Anastasia was 7 weeks along. The first period Anastasia got, while we were on our honeymoon, wasn't a period. It was the egg attaching to her uterus. So she was further along than we expected.

Our loved ones, family and friends alike, were elated with the news when we told them.

As soon as I found out she was expecting, my animal instincts took over. I've been over protective of Anastasia, more so than usual, and have been waiting on her hand and foot. When I'm away on business, I know she's well looked after, with Gail, my mother, Mia, Katherine, and Stephanie, all looking in on her.

She was planning on returning to work after we came home from our honeymoon, but now that she's pregnant, and we agreed she wouldn't work, she hasn't.

Anastasia is now in her final trimester, she's 37 weeks today, and I am taking time off work to be with her until our baby boy is born.

I'm not sure when I will return to work after our son is born, or if I will even want to.

We decided to name him after people we adore and love, that way his name will mean something to us instead of some random name in a baby book, so we each picked someone special to us. I chose my grandfather Theodore Trevelyan and Anastasia chose her father Raymond Steele. Theodore Raymond Grey. Teddy for short.

I'm on my way home, from my last day at GEH, to our house on the Sound that I purchased for Anastasia as a wedding gift.

We sold Linc's place, not that we needed the money, but it was just too weird keeping it.

I even bought Anastasia a puppy for her birthday, who she named Fifty, so we could even have the dog that Mia was talking about. I also purchased Anastasia a plum R8 and a diamond necklace that she likes to wear when we scene. She calls it her collar, but the ring on her finger is the biggest turn on for me.

I pull up to our house and park my R8.

As soon as I step out of my car, I hear Fifty barking, probably at the squirrels Mia was talking about, or it could be that he hears me.

Fifty is great. I take him with me on my runs, and I love that he's protective of Anastasia. He follows her around wherever she goes, I think he can sense she's with child, however, we have to put him away when I'm being rough with her.

When I walk through the front door, and make my way to our great room, a goddess in a white maxi dress is standing near the floor to ceiling windows. Fifty is, of course, right next to her wagging his tail at me.

She turns around completely upon hearing me enter and grins a breathtaking smile. Her beautiful long brown hair is cascading around her supple breasts, making me want some of her breast milk that has been developing. She's beautiful, as always, and her bump is making me swell in my pants, but she has a wash cloth in her hands. She's been left to her own devices all day, now that she's no longer working, so I can only imagine what she's come up with now.

"Shouldn't you be resting?" I use my Dominant tone with her, even though I'm gentle, not wanting her to be over doing anything too strenuous this far along in her pregnancy, or at all during her pregnancy now that I think about it.

"I'm nesting." She explains.

I don't know what the fuck that means, until I remember reading about it in one of the pregnancy books she bought.

"You need to rest." I insist.

"Christian, please, I'm fine." She defies me, rubbing her 9 month bump. "Dr. Greene said everything is okay."

 _ **~..~..~**_

Two weeks later Anastasia gave birth to our beautiful baby boy, our heir to the Grey fortune, and he couldn't be more perfect.

We're home now, and Anastasia is resting, taking it easy after her emergency C-section. I have never felt so scared, terrified and thankful at the same fucking time. I almost lost them both. There is no way in hell I could ever live without Anastasia, and now that I'm holding my son, while his mother naps, I couldn't live without him. I can't live without them. I was merely existing, a shell of a man, before I met Anastasia.

Teddy's coo brings me from my thoughts.

"I love you too, son." I tell him. "I love you, and I love your mama. You both make my life so complete."

I kiss his soft newborn head, and continue to rock him near the windows in our great room, looking out at the beautiful view of the Sound.

I hear a sigh from Anastasia.

Thinking she's awake, I glance behind me, over my shoulder, at my beautiful wife, but she's still peacefully napping on the couch, with Fifty on the floor near her.

 _How the fuck did I get this lucky?_

* * *

 _ **~One Year Later~**_

I'm holding the photograph that I keep on my desk. It has recently been updated to show Anastasia and I with Teddy on his first birthday. We're all a chocolate covered grinning mess, because Teddy wanted to share his smash cake with daddy, and mommy thought it was funny when Teddy made a mess all over me, so daddy shared some with her. My mother captured this candid moment with her camera when we weren't looking. It could very well quite possibly be the most beautiful image in the world at this moment, priceless and exquisite.

My intercom buzzes, bringing me from my thoughts of my son's first birthday and remembering his birth.

I put the photograph of my family, that I was admiring, back in it's rightful place, and I answer the intercom.

"Yes, Andrea?" I connect her.

 _"Mr. Grey."_ Andrea's voice comes through. _"Mr. Garrett is here to see you, sir, and he doesn't have an appointment."_

Garrett.

I never thought I would see the day, especially Anastasia's ex, but I finally have a friend. He's grown on me, I guess you could say.

Anastasia and I go out with my siblings more, along with her ex-roommate, who is still her best friend, and Stephanie. Anastasia and Stephanie are very close, so Stephanie joins us when we go out, and since Stephanie is with Garrett, and Garrett is Anastasia's friend, he joins us. They even attended our wedding. I admit it is extremely weird as fuck hanging out with an ex-Submissive of mine and Anastasia's ex, but we've all become friends.

I've gotten to know Garrett quite well doing so, and we do have a lot more in common than I originally thought. So much so, that I find myself hanging out with him without the girls around, though sometimes with Elliot. Like when we watch the Seattle Seahawks play, while we sit in the luxury private box seats that GEH owns. I've never really used it before, always allowing Elliot the privilege whenever he wanted to attend a game. It's actually quite nice, having a friend. I even work out with Garrett from time to time. He's gotten me back for those times I overreacted and physically assaulted him, but we're an even match.

"Send him in, Andrea." I tell her, wondering why he didn't call before he came.

Soon Andrea opens my door and Garrett walks in.

I greet him as he sits opposite my desk. Andrea follows him in, bringing us drinks.

"How's everything going with Stephanie?"

I ask because I know she's complaining to Anastasia, who tells me, she's miserable with morning sickness and she still has six months left in her pregnancy. Everyone's saying morning sickness doesn't last long, but Stephanie is complaining that she's going to die. It's a bit overdramatic, I can just imagine how Garrett is doing with it. Since Stephanie has been sick, he's complaining about using his hand more often than not.

"We're both suffering, but the doctor said she should get passed this stage soon, and it's looking more and more likely for the home birth now, so she's happier about that." I want to laugh about them _both_ suffering because since hanging around Anastasia, Stephanie has gotten quite the backbone. I just sit back and watch the suffering.

 _I'm telling you, I'm a sadist._

Stephanie has Garrett's balls in the palm of her hand, but I'm one to talk, Anastasia has mine.

 _Some BDSM Dominants we are_.

I guess what Anastasia said is true. When a man loves a woman, she becomes his weakness, and when a woman loves a man, he becomes her strength. It is an exchange of power, but we still power exchange in the Playroom.

"So what brings you by?"

He waits until Andrea leaves and my door is fully closed before he begins.

"Elena Lincoln," He growls out.

 _Fuck, what happened?_ She's in prison.

"She's trying to sabotage you from behind a jail cell."

"How?" That's surely not possible, is it?

"Steph received a phone call from a blocked number. She had her phone on speaker so I heard everything. I told Steph to record the conversation. We have it all on tape." He sets a device on my desk and continues. "It's basically Elena trying to get your previous Subs to say you were an abusive monster. From what I heard, most of your previous Subs wouldn't agree, but there were a select few who did. Stephanie agreed, only to get more information out of Elena, so she knows exactly which Subs were going along with the plan." He laughs once. "Stupid bitch didn't realize that Stephanie is considered your friend and she talks to your wife on a regular fucking bases."

Just as he finishes explaining, my cell vibrates with an incoming call from Anastasia.

"Hold on, I have to take this."

He nods and I answer the call.

"Baby?"

 _"Christian!"_ She sounds thankful that I answered, even though I always answer her calls, always, no matter what I'm doing. _"Sawyer said there was a detective here to see me. I told Sawyer to allow him through since I thought it may have been about the incident that happened with José, Elena and that psycho ex-Sub, but he was going on about crazy stuff. Asking if I feel safe, if you ever hit or threaten me, if I need help getting away from you. I told him-"_

"Seriously?!" I shout outraged, that a detective has seen her already about this bullshit, before she can finish her sentence. "Alright, I'm going to take care of this, baby, I'll be home soon." I have to deal with this mess anyway, might as well do it now then take the day.

 _"Christian, the detective wouldn't leave after I told him to get out._ _I had to have Sawyer escort him off our property, but_ _he's still here, just outside the gates. Sawyer-"_

"What the fuck?!" _He wouldn't leave after she told him to?!_ "I'll be there as soon as I can, baby. "

 _"Okay. I love you, drive safe."_

"I will. I love you too."

"Looks like a detective believed the bullshit." I tell Garrett after I've hung up with Anastasia, standing to put my suit jacket back on.

"Already?" Garrett asks unbelieving.

"There's someone at our house, harassing Anastasia, wanting to know if she and Teddy are safe, if I ever hit them." I know she didn't specify Teddy in our conversation, knowing it would further piss me the fuck off, but I guarantee this asshole asked her about Teddy's safety, and that must have been the nail in his coffin to turn my sweet loving wife into the mama bear that threw his ass out.

Garrett follows me as I walk out of my office.

I bark at Andrea to arrange my schedule accordingly, as I walk passed her desk, because I'm taking the day.

I waste no time getting into my R8, and being the friend he is, Garrett follows me in his car.

On the way, I listen to the recording of Elena trying to convince Stephanie to lie about our relationship and say I was abusive.

I'm not ashamed of the lifestyle anymore, but I don't broadcast it for all to know how my wife and I enjoy kinky sex, so after hearing nothing incriminating on the recording, I call the police department to find out which of their men decided to fuck up their life and is at my home harassing my wife. I also get his name and badge number with the threat of suing him.

They explain to me that the detective at my home was to see me, not my wife, and he was to gather more evidence than the words of these girls that came forward with no proof, other than their voice, because it very well may have been a publicity stunt to throw my name in the mud since I am a well known businessman. With, or without, that being said, I demand he be fired without compensation.

While they have me on the call, they tell me about the few girls who have came forward with the allegations. I explain to them our sexual relationship was all consensual, then send them a digital copy of the evidence Garrett and Stephanie have gathered on my behalf, after laying into them about going to my wife, and intimidating her, instead of coming to me so I could sort the mess of a situation out.

Fucking useless assholes apologize profusely before I end up hanging up on them.

Blackmail is now going to be added to Elena's rap sheet. Legal charges will also be brought down on the few Subs that broke their NDAs and were planning to commit perjury. Elena now has her phone privileges taken away indefinitely. Stupid bitch.

As soon as I pull up to the house, I see an unmarked police car parked in front on my home.

Instead of parking in my driveway, I park my R8 on the street behind him. I get out, the same time Garrett pulls up behind me, and march over to the detective's car with Garrett hot on my heels. I swear he gets off on seeing me in action. I should let him sit in on a takeover meeting.

As I'm walking towards this fucker's car, I see Sawyer near the front of the house, and if Taylor wasn't on vacation, having finally married Gail, I know this fucker wouldn't be parked in front of my house, but Sawyer's duty is to stay near my wife and son at all times. We're already looking into getting another full time CPO specifically for Teddy.

Some detective he is, he didn't even notice me approach his car, and jumps when I knock on his fucking window.

Seeing I'm no threat, so he thinks, he gets out of his car.

"Mr. Gr-" He begins, only I don't allow him to continue.

"Who the fuck do you think you are?" I bark at him.

"I'm D-"

"That was a rhetorical question. How dare you come to my home and harass my wife."

"I see your henchman has called you."

"Actually, my wife did. She called to tell me about some ball-less asshole, who will be out of a job and blacklisted in Seattle-"

"For doing my job,-" He has the nerve to interrupt me.

"For harassing my wife after she told you to leave her the fuck alone!" I snarl at the bastard. "You have no need to be sitting in front of my house after you were told to leave. She told you everything you needed to hear, yet you're still here, why?!"

"Sir, I was just-" He tries to explain.

"It doesn't matter. I'm making a call to your supervisor, and I'm telling the chief of police that if you're not fired, effective immediately, I will pull all my charitable funding for the Seattle Police Department." It's not so much a bluff, as I have already done this.

"Sir, please, calm down-" He tries.

"Calm down? Calm down?! I am fucking calm!"

 _He harasses my wife, insisting I hit her and my child, and he wants me to calm the fuck down?!_

"I'm sure you can understand I was just looking out for the best interest of your wife and child, sir. Please, don't do anything-"

"MY WIFE AND CHILD ARE NONE OF YOUR FUCKING CONCERN!"

"Sir," The fucker quivers, trying to explain again. "I've talk to several young women who have..." He stops, but I stay quiet, fuming, waiting for him to continue. "Sir, I- I just- Sir, there have been allegations that have been brought to my attention, and I just wanted to be sure Mrs. Grey and the child were safe."

"They are safe." I growl through my teeth, "She told you that. You still being here is the problem." Now he's just trying to get one up on thee Christian Grey, hoping it will further his career if he arrests me with this scandal, but he just fucked that to hell.

"I- I understand, sir. I-"

"No, I don't think you do. What you should have done was talk to your supervisor before making the trip to my home and bothering my wife. You knew I was at work and decided to come to my home and question my wife. She answered your questions and then asked you to leave, but you wouldn't so she had to have security escort you off our property. If that wasn't bad enough, you decided to stay parked in front of my home, trying to intimidate my wife to the point she had to call me. You should have left when my wife asked you to. Now instead of getting a slap on the wrist, you're done, finished in Seattle."

"Mr. Grey, sir,-" He's interrupted by a radio call coming from his car.

"That'll be your supervisor." I smirk in victory.

The bastard is as pale as a ghost, realizing who he just fucked with.

I look up over his car when I notice movement coming from the front of my home, and see my beautiful wife, watching on, with Teddy on her hip. She's wearing yoga pants, one of my T-shirts, and her brunette hair is in a messy bun on the top of her head.

The most beautiful fucking sight I have ever seen in all my years.

* * *

 **APOV**

 _ **~Six Months Later~**_

Christian and I have been blissfully happy, and besides the incident a few months back involving Elena trying to get in the last blow from jail, nothing has bothered us and we are currently living our happily ever after.

Nothing has made me happier than being a wife and mother. But it's exhausting, being a mom of a toddler, however, I wouldn't change my life for the world. It's hard to believe Teddy is turning two in a few short months. He's grown so fast and he's so incredibly smart. Of course, I may be bias, I am his mother.

Christian has given Ros, his right hand, more responsibility so he can be home more with me and our son every night.

Steph and Chad just welcomed their first child last night, via a home-birth, so I'm taking Teddy to see his new 'cousin' and so I can meet my god-daughter. Stephanie and Chad asked me if Christian and I would be their baby's god-parents and of course we agreed. They aren't married, and don't plan to get married. Chad doesn't want any contracts in their relationship, which is totally understandable. They're both happy, so that's all that matters.

When I pull into the driveway of Chad and Stephanie's home, I look in my rearview mirror to see a sleeping Teddy, and Sawyer pull in behind me.

Just as I'm getting Teddy out of his carseat, I hear the house door open.

When I turn around, with Teddy in my arms, I see the proud papa smiling at me.

"Hey." He whispers so he doesn't wake my son, and takes Teddy from me.

"Hi." I say and thank him for taking Teddy.

"She's upstairs in our room, I'll go lay him down in the guest room."

"Congratulations, Daddy." I smile at him before I go.

"Thanks." He grins.

I leave Chad, and go upstairs to see Steph and their new baby.

I quietly tap on the door before I open it.

Steph is laying on their bed, holding a tiny bundle. She looks up when she hears me enter and smiles.

"Congratulations, Mommy." I whisper, coming into the room.

"Thanks, Ana." She grins.

"She's beautiful." I tell her as I step closer.

I climb on the bed, sitting next to Steph, as I look at the beautiful newborn baby girl.

"Would you like to hold her?"

"Of course." I'm only too happy.

I take the precious bundle in my arms and smile.

She really is beautiful and has a surprising amount of hair for a newborn. Her eyes are open as she gazes around her new surroundings. She looks so much like her mama, with her daddy's warm brown eyes and hair, a perfect mix of them both.

"What did you name her?" I ask, because Chad and Steph kept her name a surprise and said they wouldn't tell anyone until she was born.

Before she can answer me, the bedroom door opens, and my little boy comes bouncing in like he wasn't just napping on the way over. Chad is right behind him. I ruffle Teddy's unruly copper hair that he received from his father, in fact you would think Christian made Teddy alone, he's such a carbon copy of Christian. The only thing our son received from me is my big blue eyes.

"Did you have a good little nap, Teddy bear?"

"Uh-huh." He nods, eyes curious as ever as he stares at the new baby.

"Bae-bae." He points her out.

"This is auntie Stephy and uncle Garrett's baby." Teddy calls Chad by his last name, Garrett, well he pronounces it like Gawett, because he hears his dad call him that.

"Is his name?"

"He is a she, and-" I correct him, but then stop when I realize I too don't know her name.

I look to Chad and Steph waiting to find out.

"Annie." Stephanie smiles.

"Mama?" Teddy asks, knowing he heard my dad call me Annie.

I admit, I thought the same thing.

"No, buddy," Chad says with a laugh. "Like _her_ mama."

"We took the anie from my name, Stephanie, but added another n." Steph explains. "But then we thought it sounded like we named her after you. I hope you don't mind?"

"Not at all, you name your daughter anything you want. It's your choice."

"Good." Chad grins. "Because her middle name is Rose."

I giggle. "Annie Rose."

"Hey." Chad feigns offense. "At least it's not Anastasia Rose. Her first name is after Stephanie, it's just a coincidence that the end of Steph's name is like the beginning of yours. Besides, you did introduce us after all, so if it wasn't for you, we may not have met and she wouldn't have been born."

"Well, I'm honored." I tell them then smile down at little Annie Rose Addams-Garrett.

* * *

Teddy is staying with Christian's parents tonight to give us a break. They love taking him, and we enjoy our alone time.

We decided to go to Escala for the night, instead of back home, so we can scene and play together.

I'm already waiting, wearing my lace panties and diamond collar, in position near the Playroom door, when I hear it open and close gently behind him.

I try not to squirm when I hear a slap of something, like he hit a belt, or something similar knowing belts are my hard limit, against another object. I know I'm going to be punished, and I can't wait. It wont be bad because it was a misdemeanor, and Christian never goes too far with our punishment scenes anyway, always making them pleasurable. He's still very much in control, however, he knows my limits and I trust him completely.

We've been exploring and testing more of my limits as time has passed and I've only had to safeword, yellow, once.

We weren't planning on doing a scene as soon as we arrived, but I committed the ultimate sin. I rolled my eyes. That gets me in the most pleasurable trouble. I don't mean to half the time, it just comes so naturally, but more often than not I do it so he will spank me.

Christian was going on and on about what he plans to do to me tonight, trying to get me riled up with delayed gratification, one being he was going to finally fuck my ass. He's only used small butt plugs on me, so him thinking he would actually fit his monster inside my ass was hilarious. Needless to say, my little eye roll has landed me in hot water with my husband once again.

"Stand." I didn't hear him approach me so I do jump, a little startled by his sudden appearance.

I obey his command, getting to my feet as quickly as possible, keeping my head bowed submissively.

He tells me I'm allowed to look at him throughout our scene so I do. He looks sexy in anything he wears, but his faded distressed Playroom jeans are my favorite. Especially since he doesn't wear a shirt and I am able to admire his hard, sexy, toned physic.

Instead of taking me to the whipping bench, like he usually does when he spanks me, he leads me to the bed.

He sits me, so my ass is on the edge of the bed, then lays me down. He pulls my arms taught, restraining them so they are stretched out above me. It's a weird position to be in, but I don't ask questions. He slowly walks back to the end of the bed, grabs my leg and starts trailing openmouthed kisses up my thigh, my calf, my ankle, biting each of my toes, and finally restraining my leg straight in the air to the top of the bed post. He does the same with my other leg so they are now spread wide and straight. I'm in an extremely vulnerable position and spread wide for his pleasure.

"I thought I would have a little fun before I punished you."

I stay quiet because he's not addressing me.

He walks away, coming back moments later with a flogger.

Each strike is arousing and heating my body. He knows how to make me hot and bothered.

Once he's satisfied with the results of the flogger, he drops to his knees in front of his sex.

I feel and hear him rip my panties from my body, and I'm anticipating what's to come next, knowing what he's about to do to me.

"You're very wet, Mrs. Grey." He chastises me in awe. "Dripping."

"You make me very wet, Master." I counter with a moan. I love calling him master in our scenes.

"Let's see how wet I can make you before you are allowed to cum, shall we?" _Oh shit_.

He holds my hips down, so I can't move, and soon his mouth is on my sex.

First he runs his tongue flat, tasting me with a moan of appreciation, but then he pulls my clit into his mouth sucking hard. I wrap my hands around my restraints and pull at them, I want so badly to move my hips when he enters his fingers, but I can't. My legs are restrained in the air and he's holding me down so I can't move my hips or close my thighs. I'm forced to endure this torture, this sweet pleasurable torture.

Just when I feel myself close, he stops. I try not to whimper when he pulls his mouth away from my sex.

I hear him unzip his jeans and when I look at him he's standing, gazing at my sex with dark gray eyes. His lips are glistening, wet from my juices.

"Would you like me to fuck you now, Mrs. Grey?" Like he needs to ask, as he strokes himself, eyes glued to my exposed dripping sex.

 _YES!_

"If it pleases you, Master."

"Please me it does, Mrs. Grey, however, you still need your spanking."

I cry out in surprise when he slams inside of me only to pull out.

"But you look too good like this not to sample."

He slams inside again, and this time my sex clenches around him, but he immediately pulls out like before.

"Mmmm," He moans as he pulls out. "You made my dick wet, Mrs. Grey."

"Am I supposed to be sorry, sir?" I ask confused with a giggle only to end up moaning when he slams inside of me again, but just like the other times, he pulls out soon after entering me.

"You're a very naughty girl, Mrs. Grey." He slams inside of me again, immediately pulling out. "I think you need your spanking."

When he enters me again, I try to lift my hips to meet him, but he's still holding me down so I can't.

 _Is he practicing the pull out method? UGH!_ Just fuck me already, I want to scream.

He slams in twice more, pulling out without further stimulation, then pulls his jeans back up.

He unties my legs, and carefully brings them down, then moves to take off the restraints on my wrists.

I can barely stand on my wobbly Bambi legs, but he assists me, leading me towards the red chesterfield couch.

He sits in the middle of the sofa, then pulls my arm, bringing me down so I am laying across his lap. This is my favorite spanking position because I can feel how hard he is, and it turns me on even more so. He holds me still, hooking his leg around mine. One hand on my ass, his other hand wraps around my braid.

I bite my lip so I don't moan when he grabs a fist full of my ass, then kneads it.

"Why are you being punished, Mrs. Grey?" He demands.

"Because I rolled my eyes, Master." I purr.

"And do you think that's polite, Mrs. Grey?"

"Oh, no, sir." I roll them again, grinning because he can't see me. Thank goodness I don't giggle or else he would know.

"Good girl." It always makes me wet when I hear him say that, almost as much as I love hearing him call me Mrs. Grey, and just as much as I love him calling me baby. Even him saying my name, Anastasia, is such a turn on. He could literally call me anything, a dirty little slut, _his_ dirty little slut, and I would be turned on.

"Are you going to apologize to your Master?"

"Yes, Master."

"I'm waiting."

 _Oh._

"I'm so very sorry, Master." I play my part, even though I'm not and will most definitely do it again.

"You will be."

"Will I?" I challenge him.

He chuckles, knowing I will do it again and again and ag- _oh god!_ He slips his fingers inside of me. My pussy grips him instantly.

"You have a very smart mouth, Mrs. Grey." He chastises me.

"My husband loves my smart mouth and the things I can do with it, Master." I counter.

I moan out as he continues to move his fingers inside of me.

"Mmmm." I feel his dick twitch in excitement at the thought of me pleasing him with my mouth. "That he does, Mrs. Grey."

I whimper when he pulls his fingers out of me, even tightening my sex to keep them inside a bit longer.

"Ah!" I cry out as he brings his hand down on my ass. I can feel my wetness still on his fingers giving me a slight sting when his hand makes contact.

"That's it, baby," He fondles my ass. "I want to hear you."

 _smack_

"Oh, Master." I moan when he lands another blow to my behind.

"Two." He pants, caressing my ass. "We'll go to twelve."

After he's spanked me, at least a dozen times, I'm not sure because we weren't counting, I am dripping wet and quietly begging for a release.

"You're soaked, Mrs. Grey." He inserts his fingers again.

"Oh, please, Master." I disobediently push back on his fingers. "Please."

"What do you want, Mrs. Grey?"

"You. Please." I beg of him. "Fuck me, please."

"I am fucking you, Mrs. Grey." He teases me with his fingers on my clit.

"Oh, no, sir." I mewl. "With your dick. Please, sir."

He effortlessly pulls me up so I am now straddling his lap. He lifts me by my hips so he can undo his jeans, and take them off, before he slides me on his hard cock. Instead of keeping his hands on my hips he spreads them out across the back of the sofa.

"Ride me." He demands.

I eagerly do as I'm told, putting my hands on his shoulders hand, riding him hard and fast.

He keeps his arms where they are but leans forward to suck on my nipple. I throw my head back causing my breasts to push further towards him. He's latched on tight, and each time he pulls my nipple with his teeth, my sex clenches deliciously in response, but I must not cum, I must not cum until my Master gives me permission.

"Oh god!" I cry out when I feel something pinch my nipple.

I look down, continuing to ride him, as he latches onto my other nipple, sucking greedily. The nipple he just abandoned now donned with a nipple clamp, the new ones he just bought that have diamonds on the end. I cry out again when he attaches the other clamp to my other nipple.

"Beautiful." He moans, flexing his hips up to meet me with each bounce.

"Master." I beg, addressing him properly. I'm about to cum and he's yet to grant me permission.

"Oh, baby," He moans, throwing his head back, closing his eyes, and gripping the back of the couch with his hands so he doesn't touch me, as I continue to bounce up and down on his dick.

It's all too much, instead of keeping my fast pace, I thrust my hands into his hair, grip hard, and slow my movements, however, that just makes it worse. It feels so much better when I grind on him.

Try as I might, I'm going to cum within a matter of seconds. Then he goes and pulls me to him, kissing me. He knows damn well what that does to me when we're in a scene.

"Now," He finally grants me permission, releasing my nipple clamps, but it's too late, I cum before he's even uttered the word.

I slow my movements even more, so Christian puts his hands on my hips to move me himself, while he continues to flex his hips up and kiss me. My sex is contracting violently around his dick and it doesn't take long before I feel his sperm shoot inside me. His dick is pulsating and I can feel our juices leak out of me.

He continues flexing his hips and thrusting his tongue into my mouth.

Once I've finally finished cuming, he pulls out of me, but keeping me straddled on his lap.

"I love you, Anastasia Grey."

"I love you, Master." I stay in Sub-mode.

He shakes his head. "Say my name."

"That is your name." I tell him. "You are the master of my universe, Christian, and you always will be. I love you so much, Christian."

I kiss him with as much passion as I can, trying to show him with this single display of affection how much he means to me, but it's nearly impossible. Kisses and words can not express how I feel about this man, my man, my husband.

My _FiftyShades_.

* * *

 _ **~Six Months Later~**_

 **CPOV**

I've just finished reading Teddy his favorite bedtime story for the second time tonight. I can't believe he's already two, where does the time go? Our family and friends have just left. It's so hard to see Elliot as a family man. He doesn't have any children yet, but Kate is pregnant with their first child and they were married before he knocked her up. I never thought Elliot would settle down, regardless of Katherine being the longest relationship I have even known him to have, but then again, I never would have thought I would settle down either.

If you had told me before I met Anastasia, I would never of believed you if you told me this was now my life. Hosting barbeques and children's birthday parties at my home, not at Escala where I thought I would live forever, at an actual house that I share with my family.

I quietly close Teddy's door so I don't wake him, then make my way back downstairs to help my wife clean up, or perhaps make everything a bit dirtier.

When I make it back to the kitchen, she's putting left over chocolate cake in our refrigerator. Just thinking about Teddy, Annie, and soon to be Ava, it makes me want another baby. It's been far too long since she's been pregnant. I miss the feeling it gave me each time I saw her bump, knowing I did that to her. I want to do that again, and again. I'm surprised she's not getting baby fever, and it's me that's going to ask first.

"Let's have another baby." I tell her, coming up behind her and nuzzling my nose in her hair so I can smell her signature sweet intoxicating scent.

"Christian," She giggles, jumping a little. "Teddy just turned two."

"It's my ultimate goal, baby, to keep you knocked up," I tell her, rubbing my hands along her flat stomach. "Swollen with my seed, barefoot and pregnant in the kitchen."

"You would." Even though I can't see it, I know she rolled her eyes at me.

"Oh, Anastasia," I moan, she knows what that does to me. "Did you just roll your eyes at me?"

Even after all this time together, I can still make her blush, blush like a rose. My _BlushingRose._

 **~The End~**


End file.
